Characters / Squidbillies

Early Cuyler

Our main character. A backwoods squid, inbred to the point of blacking out, and has a temper ready to go off at the slightest provocation.

Voiced by: Unknown Hinson

  • Abhorrent Admirer: To any female he fancies, but mostly Glenn's Wife.
  • Abusive Parents: Shooting Rusty, stabbing him, punching him, using his skin on a taxidermy model...yeah.
  • Ax-Crazy: He's one crazy violent hillbilly.
  • Butt-Monkey: He becomes this in several episodes due to his Too Dumb to Live status.
  • Comedic Sociopath: Abusive psycho, yes. But damn if it ain't hilarious.
  • Couch Gag: His hats
  • Cloud Cuckoolander: A combination of being a backwoods idiot, chemical and alcohol consumption of inhuman levels, and several decades in prison has left him with a...unique mindset.
  • Everyone Has Standards: Early will go to insane and moronic lengths to protest or support most anything. But marrying a bear to protest gay marriage is too insane even for him.
  • Expy: He's basically the character of Unknown Hinson in Cephalopod form.
  • Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow: Had a pretty wicked mane before going to jail.
  • Jerkass: Oh, big time. And that's putting it VERY mildly.
  • Karma Houdini: Usually, he does suffer for what he does occasionally and he has been arrested many, many times, but the sheriff lets him out just as often, this pretty much applies to every criminal in Dougal County.
  • Knife Nut: His usual weapon of choice, when not sporting his shotgun.
  • Laser-Guided Karma: Every now and then he suffers from actions.
  • Malaproper: His speechanating consistafies of addifying extra verbatages on the end of his wordamating.
  • Nice Hat: A seemingly endless collection of them.
  • Sawn-Off Shotgun: His favored Weapon of Choice.
  • Too Dumb to Live: Several episodes end with his death.
  • Trigger Happy: His trigger finger is perpetually itchy.
  • Villain Protagonist: Pretty much.
  • Yandere: For Krystal.

Ruby Jean "Granny" Cuyler

Early and Lil's mom (Or grandmother, as no one is really sure, not even her). A perverted, senile old squid with a walker.

Voiced by: Dana Snyder

Rusty Cuyler

Early's dimwitted, but more well meaning and kindhearted son.

Voiced by: Daniel McDevitt

  • Half-Human Hybrid: Squid father, human mother.
  • Hilariously Abusive Childhood: The kid has been a Butt-Monkey since he was born.
  • Jerkass: Given his upbringing, it's no surprise that he has moments of cruelty. In one episode, he threatened Granny with a knife. In another episode, he rolled a limbless Early down the street until Early threw up from motion sickness.
    • Jerk with a Heart of Gold: Has his moments. He genuine loves his family and often expresses doubt at his families more morally questionable actions.
  • Only Sane Man: Not on a consistent basis, but he's the only one even approaching this trope on the show.
  • Overly Long Name: His full name is Russell Jesse James Kenny the gambler Rogers #3 the intimidator Dale Earnhardt America's Number 1 Cuyler.
  • Raised by Wolves...horribly.
  • Token Good Team Mate: The closest thing to one. While he can be just as cruel as his family he tends to be the one to object to his families more evil acts.
  • Too Dumb to Live: Though a little smarter about it than Early and Granny.
  • "Well Done, Son!" Guy

Lil Cuyler

Early's frequently passed out, meth making (and meth using) sister.

Voiced by: Patricia French

  • Demoted to Extra: Courtesy of being passed out almost every episode.
  • Really Gets Around: Not as much as Krystal, but she still gets around. In "Green and Sober" alone, she does Ellis(Three times) the guitar player of the band, a mans wife, and a pervert from the Reverends addict group.
  • The Smart Guy: By Cuyler standards, anyway. She's the only one smart enough to know how to run the meth lab.
  • Throw the Dog a Bone: Finally becomes sober in "Green and Sober"
  • The Voiceless: Has largely become this.
  • Walking Shirtless Scene: According to Early, "She ain't wore a shirt since 89".


The rather hapless, useless, and frequently killed lawman of Dougal County.

Voiced by: Charles Naiper(Episodes 1-8) Bobby Ellerbee(Episode 9-onwards)

Deputy Denny

A tiny, malformed Sheriff clone, and basically the Sheriff's right hand man.

Voiced by: Dave Willis

Dan Halen

CEO of Dan Halen Sheetrock International. An evil little bugger, who can get away with just about any evil thing he wants.

Voiced by: Todd Hanson


A monstrously fat, monstrously ugly, and monstrously skanky freeloader, who lives in the local junkyard.

Voiced by: Mary Kraft

Gaga Pee Pap "Twelve Gun" Cuyler.

Early and Lil's freewheeling, criminal grandfather(Or father). Apparently raised the both of them before running off to who knows where.

Voiced by: Jesco White

  • Bi the Way: Pretty much says it himself.
    Gaga: Hey now, I said related is fine but it's gotta be a woman! I ain't into much.
  • Catchphrase: "I got you again!" and "Allegedly!"
  • Incurable Cough of Death: Got the cancer from his "Healthy Sticks".


White Sheep of the Cuyler clan. Got a GED, and ran off to the big city, marrying a white woman.


Early's perpetually uninterested and abused coworker.

Voiced by: Dave Willis

  • Dull Surprise: Even when he's getting his ass whipped.
  • Ugly Guy, Hot Wife: According to Early, anyway. What with his frequent lusting after his wife.
  • Vocal Evolution: Had a much higher voice in early episodes, compared to the deep baritone he developed later.


A gap toothed, more sane minded redneck girl, and Rusty's first girlfriend. Also the mother of his son, Macho Man Randy Cuyler.

Voiced by: Elizabeth Cook

  • Closer to Earth: Compared to...damn near everyone else in Dougal County, she's got a level head on her shoulders.
  • Incest Is Relative: Finds out a little late that she and Rusty share the same mother.
    • Possibly implied by she and her dad sleeping in the same bed. If they did more than just sleeping in there, it's not stated.


Unlucky proprietor of the local convenience store, and frequent victim of robberies from Early.

Voiced by: Pete Smith

  • Butt-Monkey: Robbed almost daily by Early, usually getting his hand blown off before it's over.
  • Character Tic: He's so conditioned from robberies, that he frequently talks with his hands held up.