And this is just the first mission!
As a Moments subpage, all spoilers are unmarked as per policy. You Have Been Warned.
- Starting with the first mission, Zero Saints Thirty. The Saints team up with MI6 to hunt down and kill a known terrorist. After the events of the "Save Your Homies" ending of Saints Row the Third, Cyrus Temple could not stand the Saints being hailed as heroes, and plans to nuke Washington DC in retaliation. The Boss begins by rushing several guards and taking them out mercilessly while British spy Asha looks on slack jawed, and it gets better from there. After killing Temple the nuke is launched, and everyone is shocked as it looks like the Boss is doing a Heroic Sacrifice to stop it. Thinking it's their last chance each Saint pours their heart out as parting words only for the Boss to manage to grab onto the missile and disable it, in flight, all of this happening while Aerosmith's "I Don't Want to Miss a Thing" plays before it explodes. The Boss then flashes a thumbs up at the audience, before crashing into the Oval Office of the White House, and sitting in the President's chair, while the adoration of America, the Presidency, Keith fucking David and Benjamin motherfucking King is "Unlocked" for the Saints. Bad. Ass.
- The South Portico defense mission doubles as this and a Moment of Funny: The Boss is blowing alien gunships out of the air by the dozen while doing ridiculous hand gestures and dropping Bond One-Liners all over.
- What else do you say after shooting down an alien warship in front of the White House and jumping into its cockpit to fistfight a ten-foot-tall psychic alien warlord and being subsequently pinned down than:The President: "Get the hell off my lawn, you son of a bitch!"
- The fact that the President would have killed Zinyak DURING THEIR VERY FIRST MEETING if not for Zinyak having cheated via superpowers.
- The whole escape mission after the President wakes up from the simulation for the first time. After massacring his or her way through countless hardened Zin soldiers and jumping aboard Kinzie and Keith David's spaceship, the President proceeds to pilot the ship while Haddaway's "What Is Love" song is playing. Epic.
- Wearing his/her birthday suit, no less.
- The reveal of Johnny Gat's return is suitably epic. A low, panning shot of dozens of dead bodies, followed by the lone surviving Zin getting shanked through the skull with a combat knife, as Johnny casually recovers his glasses. "Fuck... yes." For thousands of fans who were hoping the gangster had found a way to cheat death, it was a moment worth cheering for.
- In fact, the very reason Johnny's alive. During what appeared to be his death in SRTT, Zinyak had actually captured him because he feared Johnny'd single-handedly stop his invasion. Zinyak feared JOHNNY GAT more than even the President!
- At the end of Shaundi's loyalty mission Veteran Child clones himself, take both Shaundis hostage and forces Boss to choose which one lives and dies. Both Shaundis go Fuck. That, overpower him, and old Shaundi shoots Veteran Child taking new Shaundi hostage and new Shaundi shoots Veteran Child taking old Shaundi hostage.
- The licensed music played during key moments in the game help to add to the sheer amount of kickass this game packs. To list a few examples:
- Aerosmith's "I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing", played at the end of the first mission when the Boss stops the nuke from destroying Washington DC.
- Haddaway's "What Is Love", played during the mission where The Boss pilots a spaceship (with Kinzie and Keith David aboard) to escape from the Zin mothership.]
- Thin Lizzy's "The Boys Are Back In Town", played during Johnny Gat's loyalty mission, celebrating his return as he and the Boss enjoy some Genkibowl.
- Stan Bush's "The Touch", played during the Grand Finale after the Boss dons power armor. The Boss and Zinyak reciting Optimus Prime and Megatron's dialogue from Transformers: The Movie makes it all the more awesome.
- And Montell Jordan's "This Is How We Do It" during the soul train before the credits of the Good Ending.
- The good ending itself is in danger of making one go blind from awesome. Not only do the Saints now lead the intergalactic Zin Empire, not only do they go on a drunken rampage through time, but they manage to save thousands of the best and brightest people Zinyak collected from Earth's history including the narrator of the story: Jane Austen. Oh. My. God.
- Kinzie's What the Hell, Hero? speech to the Boss for taking the crew for granted.
- This must be expanded on. The implication here is that over the past few years, the crew excluding you, Pierce, Shaundi, and Ben King, had to listen to y’all rant and rave about some dude they never met and have no reason to care about. Then, when one of them has the audacity to raise concerns, you beat the shit out of him. This is her speech in full:
Kenzie: “Stop it! He’s right, OK? It’s a terrible idea! In order to save Johnny we’re going to have to tap directly into his mind, and that means Zinyak is going to know exactly where we are. You’re asking Matt and I to paint a target on humanity’s last chance so that you can go rescue someone we’ve never even met. And what’s even stupider is that we’re going along with it. That guy you just beat the shit out of is risking everything to save your friend, and you wanna know why? Because we can’t save ours anymore! Oleg is dead. Viola is dead. Earth is dead. So how about you stop being a fucking asshole and say, ‘thank you for giving us the hope you’ll never have.’” - A complete list of the time traveling shenanigans:
- Johnny Gat explained to Columbus the Earth was round, worked for Attila the Hun, cut down Washington's cherry tree, pimped out the Trojan Horse, graffitied a dinosaur skeleton, stole the golden Transcontinental Railroad spike, scammed Custer with a life insurance policy, sabotaged a chariot race and took part in the shootout at the OK Corral with an M16 assault rifle!
- Kinzie replaced Marilyn Monroe in the famous skirt maneuver, replaced Raquel Welch in the latter's cavewoman pose, was the inspiration for the Lady Godiva legend and had phone sex with Alexander Graham Bell.
- Benjamin King helped build the pyramids, helped Shakespeare write Hamlet, stopped at least one Viking raid, boosted the wheels from the first car, and partied with Nero while Rome burned.
- Shaundi was the original model for the Venus de Milo (it lost its arms when she accidentally fired her gun), was responsible for Leonardo cropping the Mona Lisa after drawing her as a mermaid, plane surfed on top of the Wright Brother's plane, dressed up like Betsy Ross and pimped out the first American flag, and royally screwed up the world's animal population by sneaking all manner of monsters and mythological creatures onto Noah's ark.
- Pierce dumped a basket of apples on Isaac Newton, graffitied the Great Wall, traded hats with Davy Crockett, inspired the story of the boy who held back the sea, taught the Knights of the Round Table roulette, and gave Abraham Lincoln a punk rocker haircut.
- Asha pranked Neil Armstrong by placing a banana peel in front of his lunar lander, and fought against the British occupation of India with Ghandi (using kung fu, naturally).
- Then the whole crew got drunk as hell and went on a dinosaur joyride.
- Could one ask for a better ending?
- The "Nuke" ability. When slamming into the ground from a sufficient height it causes an explosion so big the camera has to zoom out to show the entire city block just to get a good view of it. Bonus points for smoldering embers floating through the air afterwards and the ground being on fire where you landed.
- Although sometimes a source of Nightmare Fuel (since they're, y'know nightmares designed to break the victims mind), the simulations for the lieutenants end up with them pulling a Moment of Awesome to break out, with their Loyalty missions often being to finish what they just started:
- After slogging through Zinyak's insufferable text-based adventure, Matt Miller takes out Killbane in a no-holds-barred pro-wrestling match. In his loyalty mission, he lives out his Nyte Blayde Self-Insert Fic, and somehow manages to convert the Boss into a fan of the show, who gives Matt all rights to the franchise!
- Shaundi has you fighting with Fun!Shaundi against waves of Veteran Children (Veteran Childs). Her loyalty mission has both Shaundis smoke up some drugs for superpowers, before challenging herself to a sprinting race and Kamehame Hadoken duel. After those good times, you fight DJ Veteran Child once again, and when he tries to force you into a Sadistic Choice, both Shaundis go Fuck. That., and both take out the last Veteran Childs themselves.
- Pierce has you fight off waves of demonic Saints Flow mascots, and a battle with a giant Saints Flow can named Paul ripped out of a Disaster Movie: first you fire rockets at his face, then you shoot at it from a helicopter, and then you fight it with a living statue. His Loyalty Mission has him pull of one of his over-complicated schemes to take out Maero and the Brotherhood.
- Benjamin King relives the moment Tanya and the Vice Kings betrayed him. After running to the Saints church to find Julius, the Boss helps him wipe out the VK's, and forces Tanya to flee the simulation - and King's loyalty mission is all about making sure that Manipulative Bitch is Rewarded as a Traitor Deserves.
- Asha has you aiding her in taking down your Evil Twin in one huge nod to the Metal Gear Solid series specifically, and stealth-based games as a whole. After kicking your own ass, you and Asha Double Tap yourself one more time for old times sake, and Asha flicks her cigarette on your evil corpse. Her loyalty mission starts off pedestrian with escorting a VIP, but quickly escalates to a high-speed chase out of a political thriller movie. And then Prof. Genki shows up, becomes Super Genki, and you both get to kick his ass with superpowers.
- Johnny Gat plays through Saints of Rage a 2D Beat 'em Up sidescroller to save Aisha, first against Warren Williams and the Vice Kings, then Jyunichi and the Ronin. After the Boss stops Jyunichi from executing Aisha, you both fight a sword-duel with Jyunichi, who becomes Super Jyunichi once his health bottoms out. Although it ends up a Bittersweet Ending by forcing Gat to realize that it was All Just a Dream, it's gratifying as hell to fight alongside your best friend once again. And his loyalty mission is even more badass, where you go all Bash Brothers through Professor Genki's Super Ethical Reality Climax, which culminates in a boss fight with Philippe Loren, allowing you both to get the closure of killing that Frenchie ("BELGIAN!!!" "Whatever.") in an actual boss fight.
- After Keith David turned against Zinyak shortly after he turned against you, you relive the most iconic action sequences of They Live!, with Rowdy Roddy Piper delivering a Curb-Stomp Battle in an alleyway, and you shooting up a brainwashing device that was driving Keith insane.
- To save Kinzie, you return to 50s!Steelport, to find that it has been taking over by a deliberately Flanderized Straw Conservative/Straw Misogynist Cyrus Temple (and has forced Kinzie to be his housewife against her will). After shutting down his propaganda machine, you take down Cyrus with weaponized Dubstep. Her loyalty mission has you taking out Cyrus and STAG once and for all, by plowing through his armies like they were made of paper. The hard-pumping rock and roll lets you know that SHIT JUST GOT REAL, and the way that Kinzie finishes off Cyrus and the rest of Stag is the definition of awesome: she drops a nuclear fart, taking out all the STAG, then delivers a No-Holds-Barred Beatdown to Cyrus, all while dropping a Cluster F-Bomb rant that is really cathartic (if a little weird) to hear coming from her mouth to tell Cyrus all the reasons he sucks.
- Volition letting fans see what Enter the Dominatrix (The DLC for the third game that would become this game) could have been by releasing it as a full DLC for this game. As well as bringing back Donnie and Zimos, on top of that. Oh yes, and making the Framing Device the Saints doing a full-on hilarious DVD Commentary track where they point out all the Obvious Beta elements like cut content and blatantly unfinished parts.
- The XMAS DLC is basically the Saints' Boss going on An Asskicking Christmas, going head-to-head with Santa Claus' Evil Twin, Clawz. And not only does it get Reference Overdosed on some of the most legendary Christmas Specials of all time, but it's still feels more genuinely Christmas-y than most other Christmas Specials that are Only in It for the Money.
- And, Volition keeps bringing the love! In the announcement trailer for the latest stand-alone expansion
, they reveal that you will play as Johnny Gat, and your mission will be to go into Hell and shoot the Devil in the face. Budge over, Doom Marine. Saints Row don't shiv.- And hey, on top of that Kinzie has seemingly proved her own popularity and is also playable in the expansion too!
- One of the recent trailers for Gat out of Hell...is a musical. A musical starring Satan, his daughter, Johnny, and Kinzie. And it's so well done it's like something out of a Disney movie. It has to be seen to be believed.
