The Patriot: Think of it as Braveheartin the Revolutionary War, as William Wallace (initially) refuses to get involved with the growing tensions between England and the Colonies, going as far as forbidding his eldest son the Joker from enlisting in the revolutionary army. He (and the Joker) eventually join after Wallace's youngest son is brutally shot by Captain Hook of the British army. Odo also stars as a preacher-turned soldier.
A Perfect Getaway: Lilu Dallas Multipass goes on her honeymoon in Hawaii (which is, for once, playing itself never mind, it's being played by Costa Rica) and meets up with skeevy hikers and Crazy Survivalists (or something).
Planet Terror (Hoo boy): Paige Halliwell is a dissatisfied stripper who has conflicted feelings about Rico Diaz. Meanwhile Sayid is a sadistic(?) terrorist(?) who tries to outfox John McClane who has relased The Virus, triggering a Zombie Apocalypse, one of the first victims of which is Stacy Furguson. The zombies attack a hospital, where Esteban the pimp's evil son-in-law George W. Bush tries to kill his wife with her own anesthetics. He fails, and she joins her father and Kyle Reese. Everyone meets at a BBQ restaurant, then goes to the army base for a big battle with the now-deranged soldiers who started this whole mess in the first place.
Alien vs. Predator: Nala (from The Musical) is part of a team that includes Bishop who goes to investigate a mysterious multicultural pyramid in the Arctic.
Predators: Morpheus and The Pianist are sent to a planet/nature preserve that's totally not Pandora for sport by the Predators.
The Prestige: Wolverine and Batman become magicians and continually try to one-up each other with disastrous results with help from Alfred, Gollum, and Jareth.Black Widow is the woman that comes between them.
This is what you call canned awesome. Of course, what makes it even better is that the film is actually pretty much as awesome as described here.
Psycho (1998 Gus Van Sant remake): Marin Frist steals some money so she and her boyfriend Aragorn can run off together. During the night she stops at a desolate motel run by EdgerFred Claus, who becomes a Stalker with a Crush. Later, Marin's sister Clarice Starling 2.0 comes looking for her, along with Aragorn and The President, who is looking for the money (I think).
