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Take That / Epic Rap Battles of History

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Ignoring the obvious digs that the rappers do on each other all the time, rappers do incorporate other media references in their disses.


  • One in "Lincoln vs. Chuck Norris":
    Lincoln: I got my face on the side of a mountain; you voted for John McCain!
  • Dr. Seuss gets pissed off when Shakespeare claims that he probably wrote the Twilight books in addition to his own works.
  • Mitt Romney says that Barack Obama married "the female version of Patrick Ewing."
  • To Mozart, Skrillex reeks of "dead mouse."
  • Picasso calls Bob Ross "the PBS version of Nickelback."
  • Muhammad Ali says that Michael Jordan's rapping "sucks more than Space Jam did."
  • In "Gandalf vs. Dumbledore":
    Dumbledore: Your spells are a joke, and not funny ones, either / Mines of Moria? Ha! More like Mind of Mencia!
  • In "Blackbeard vs. Al Capone", Capone brags that he's "ruining pirates faster than Johnny Depp did."
  • "Spielberg vs. Hitchcock" is filled with shots at Michael Bay, with every one of the four opposing battlers reproaching him at some point or another in their raps. Spielberg himself has executive-produced Bay's Transformers movies and was the one who demanded Megan Fox be fired from the third film after her disparaging comments toward Bay.
    • Also, Alfred Hitchcock calls Spielberg "more horrible than Megan Fox's acting", and Michael Bay stresses that he can "even make Mark Wahlberg make some motherfucking money!"
  • Given "RoboCop vs. Terminator", you can imagine which films are given this treatment here.
    RoboCop: And I didn't think I had any feelings left inside me / but my heart was surely broken after Terminator 3!
    The Terminator: I have detailed files on the conclusion to your trilogy / that movie failed Detroit worse than the automotive industry!
  • Harry Houdini claims David Copperfield is "the saddest thing to happen to magic since the Gathering."
  • According to one of Deadpool's voices, Boba Fett is like The Star Wars Holiday Special — "full of bad choices." Fett then retorts that Deadpool "should have made the choice to ditch the prick from Van Wilder".
  • While rebutting George R. R. Martin, J. R. R. Tolkien gets in a rant about people who think that True Art Is Angsty invoked or The Good Guys Always Win is an inherently bad trope:
    Tolkien: Now, we all know that the world is full of chance and anarchy / So, yes, it's true to life for characters to die randomly / But newsflash — the genre's called FANTASY / It's MEANT to be unrealistic, YOU MYOPIC MANATEE!
  • In the same battle, Tolkien mocks Martin for the fact that his books have sold less copies than Fifty Shades of Grey.
  • James Bond (the Sean Connery one) dismisses his Daniel Craig counterpart with "If I wanted shitty acting in my action film, I'd go and watch Taken."
  • Charles Darwin mentions to Ash Ketchum that it took millions of years for mankind to evolve, but now they're all hunched on their cell phones, playing with their balls.
  • Wolverine calls Freddy Krueger "a pedophile from the Midwest", making him look even worse by adding that "at least R. Kelly could sing".
  • Robin Williams' line "I love the Prince, but you'll never have a friend like me" is a shot at the remake of Aladdin starring Smith as the Genie, which Williams played in the original movie.
  • Jacques Cousteau tells Steve Irwin "I have Oscars, you're in Dr. Dolittle 2."
  • Dracula claims that Vlad the Impaler has "less taste than an Anne Rice cake" and is "losing so bad, [he] should join Team Jacob". Vlad, for his part, mocks Dracula for inspiring Count Chocula.
  • Pennywise the Clown takes one at Jared Leto's performance in Suicide Squad (2016):
    Jack Nicholson played you just fine, but lately the casting's declined
    Jared Leto came out trying to look like he was Tekashi 6ix9ine!
  • Later in the same battle, Joker takes a shot at the infamous teen orgy scene from IT, saying that even he would never stoop to writing something so tasteless.
  • In ''Harry Potter vs. Luke Skywalker", Harry takes multiple shots at the sequel trilogy and especially the way it portrayed Luke, saying the people behind it "compact[ed his] character to trash".
  • In Ragnar Lodbrok vs. Richard the Lionheart, Richard tells Ragnar that his story "ended worse than Game of Thrones" and says that if he wanted to fight loser Vikings, he'd go to Minnesota. Richard also compared the tattoos on Ragnar's head to that of Post Malone.
  • "Godzilla vs. King Kong":

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