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Quotes / Accidental Innuendo

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"Vibration does what no hand can!"
Advertisement for Maybelline Mascara With a Vibrating Wand

"Give us Black Dick, and we fear nothing."
Sarah Phillips, Liberty's Kidsnote 

"Putting all her weight on my body, Haruhi then pushed me down to the floor. Haruhi rode me like a horse, getting in the mount position."

Kyoki: (reprimanding Love Espada) "Espada-senpai! This year, I won't let you do as you please!!"
(Espada coaxes her into one of the school's clubrooms and does exactly that)

Stephen Fry: What you need is length and thickness...
Alan Davies: That is going to be snipped out, straight on YouTube.

Chugga: Look at her her (Peach's) hair and (notices Peach's animation looks rather "suggestive") What the hell? WHAT!?
Jon: Hump that chest, Peach! Hump that chest! You show it who's boss!
The Runaway Guys pointing out Peach's rather unusual animation during Mario Party.

"If I got it the right length precisely, I could spring the finishing ejaculation with effect enough to make some impressive girl deliver a startled little yelp and jump out of her seat- and that was what I was after."
Mark Twain explaining that timing beats is everything when telling a horror story (or a joke), How To Tell A Story.

Angus: Busy night, eh?
Hannelore: Yes, very!
Angus: It sure sounded like you were enjoying yourselves.
Hannelore: Oh no, did we keep you up? I tried to be quiet!
Angus: It's cool. It's hard to be quiet when you're that excited.
Hannelore: At first I wasn't really sure what was going on, but Marigold explained everything as we went along, and then I just got carried away, you know?
Angus: I'm impressed you were keep up with her all night like that.
Hannelore: Hehe, I'm sorta regretting it now. My butt is all sore!
Angus: No! Don't say it! You'll break the spell!
Hannelore: My favorite part was when you took on those four guys at once! And then that giant dog!

Take off that Supergirl costume right now! And remove those boots, too!
Superman asking his sixteen-year-old cousin to put on her civilian clothes

"I'm told I come across as awkward sometimes, but if nothing else, I'm good with my hands."
Eleanor Hume, Tales of Berseria

"I have no idea who you are, but I thank you for arousing me."
Beruga, Terranigma

"I'm coming!" (while trying to catch his car up)
"CCR" Motoki, Wangan Midnight Maximum Tune 4

Clara: (climbing out of a window) My bussel is stuck!
The Doctor: Your bussel?!
(he pulls her out of the window but falls backwards, Clara lands on top of him)
The Doctor: You're going to have to take those clothes off.
Clara: (gasps)
The Doctor: ...I didn't mean-
Clara: I know.
The Doctor: I just-
Clara: I understand, I do.
The Doctor: Good.
Doctor Who, "The Snowmen"

This is how we BANG!
— "THIS IS HDM" by Relect, crossbeats REV. SUNRISE

Marion: (while staring at Sonia's boobs) I see... Milk.
Shining Resonance, comedy skit

Estelle: "Victory calls, and I come."
Flynn: "As you will".
Tales of Vesperia, post-victory banter

Black: We are the protagonists.
Joy: And we fight for love and justice.
Black: I'm Black.
Joy: And I'm Joy.
Black: And on behalf of my balls,
Both: We shall punish you!

"This is no place where Mianus wants to be"
The announcer in a mixed martial arts match featuring Danny Mianus

"The time has come for me to clear my reputation... by assaulting this young girl!"
Schezo Wegey, Puyo Puyo Tetris

"I'm really going to enjoy this. Prepare to bleed."

"Don't worry. Rarity. I've got you covered."
Applejack, The Best Night Ever

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