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"This has to have been the stupidest night in my entire life."
Pinot Noir, summing up the story in a nutshell.

Pinot Noir is an action/comedy/horror/sci-fi/supernatural story written by Therealjackieboy on Fictionpress.

Pinot Noir is an assassin working in Kaos city, a crime-ridden hellhole that really comes alive on Purge Night, where criminals, gangsters, and other violent miscreants are allowed to commit any sort of debauchery they can. Pinot however, chooses tonight to instead get some rest, as he hasn't been able to get any for a few weeks. But when things get too hectic outside, and Pinot realizes that he can't get any sleep at all, he decides to grab his weapons and trenchcoat and gun down every criminal organization in town in order to acquire the shuteye he needs. Hilarity Ensues.

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This story provides examples of:

  • Abusive Parents: Big D had a very abusive mother, who regularly beat his frail father (to the point where he died after one of her beatings) for any slight screwup, and would instill a masculine attitude and lifestyle upon Damien.
  • Acrofatic: Miss Himiko is not only revealed to be an overweight woman behind the scenes, but an overweight women capable of rapid punches, backflips, and high kicks.
  • Action Girl: "Red", an assassin in Kaos who is tasked by D's men to take out Pinot.
  • Affably Evil:
    • Timmy, despite being Big D's high ranked servants, is actually not that bad a guy. When confronted by Pinot near the end, he politely tells him that he's planning to leave, refuses to fight him, and even gives him a snack and some water to keep him fed.
    • The Master Torturer, given his namesake, is the leader of a gang of hedonistic torturers. Nevertheless, when he confronts Pinot, he has a friendly conversation with him before he begins his torture process, even calling him a "brother" should he survive his torture methods.
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  • Affectionate Parody: Of over-the-top action films, video games, vigilante stories, and B-grade exploitation flicks.
  • The Alcoholic: Implied with Jerrel, who shows up to his meeting for the Gangrew gang with an alcohol monitoring bracelet around his ankle.
  • Alliterative Name: Kleetus Klementine. Same goes for his real name, Christopher Cogswell.
  • Ambiguously Gay: It's heavily implied that Mr. Pow and Blam are in some kind of relationship. Mr. Pow's death proceeds to break Mr. Blam, the narration showing that he really cared for his partner in crime.
  • Ambiguously Jewish: Timmy, whose last name is Coen, and is a practitioner in Krav Maga.
  • Ambiguous Time Period: The time period isn't stated, yet has cell phones, tape recorders, cassettes, boom boxes, high tech cybernetic weaponry, and phone booths being seen as outdated.
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  • Arc Villain: While the story has its own overarching antagonists, each chapter starting with the third has its own Big Bad for Pinot to take down and kill.
  • Arms Dealer: Melon LaMar, one of, if not the most famous arms dealers in all of Kaos.
  • Asian Airhead: Miss Himiko talks like a ditzy Asian woman, similar to that of a little Anime girl. Subverted when she's shown to be more cunning and capable of speaking perfect English behind the curtain.
  • Asshole Victim:
    • Jerrel, who gets killed in a prolonged, painful manor, is a smug rapist who tried to hand over D's resources to a lesser gang. Even the gang's leader tries to kill Jerrel for being dishonest.
    • Richie Sallinger is brutally murdered by Timmy, but since he's a pedophilic necrophiliac, nobody complains.
  • B-Movie: The story is written in the style of one, with over the top scenarios, larger than life characters, hammy dialogue, and a plot that is just an excuse for crazy action-packed antics.
  • Bad Boss: Crank Gibson is a major example of this. He carelessly kills off his entire factory staff in order to kill Pinot, and even had one of his drug dealers killed for labeling this action as "horrible."
  • Badass Longcoat: Pinot wears a black one, while Melon wears a brown one.
  • Badass in a Nice Suit:
    • Timmy wears a dashing suit, and can kick ass.
    • "Red" also wears one, and can too kick ass.
  • Bald, Black Leader Guy: Big D is one towards not only his gang, but also Kaos as a whole.
  • Bare Your Midriff: Greta is an unintentional, non-fanservice example. Her stomach's so large, that the lilac shirt she wears ends up showing off most of her belly, and she can't even close her lab coat due to her gut getting in the way.
  • Batman Gambit: Kleetus knew that Alexander would play the hero and deliberately set the key to his and everyone else's cages, knowing that he would devise a plan to save him and the other captives. Knowing this, Kleetus, seeking to get rid of the other kids before Purge Night ended, waited outside the door to freedom and killed the escaping kids, except for Alexander.
  • Berserk Button: Do NOT call Greta a "Doctor," as she hasn't gotten her degree. Pinot learned that the hard way.
  • Bi the Way: Implied with Pinot, as he has posters of naked men and women in his room.
  • Big Bad: Big D is the crime boss who rules over all criminal activity in Kaos, and is responsible for Purge Night, a single night in which criminals are allowed to commit whatever crime they want. Eventually, he sends his men after Pinot himself, who is killing the criminals of the city to get himself some sleep. However, the real villains are Greta Ludwig von Hertz, D's head Mad Doctor who has her own plans that involve the death of D's son and the capturing of Pinot for her own personal needs, while also being the one to pitch the concept of Purge Night to D, making her just as responsible for everything that goes on in the story; and Kleetus Klementine/Christopher Cogswell, a separate villain and preacher who's responsible for multiple child kidnappings, hinted to be responsible for the rampant crime in Kaos via black magic, and is actually an immortal servant of Shub-Niggurath that wants to destroy all living things on the planet.
  • Big "NO!": Mr. Blam screams this after Mr. Pow gets stabbed by Kleetus.
  • Bittersweet Ending: A lot of bad guys are dead, the world has been saved from Christopher and Greta's plans, Big D has died, and Pinot has accomplished his goal. However, Pinot commits suicide due to only getting a minute of good sleep until his alarm wakes him up, and over 2 million people have died that night. The ending also hints at a possible, bloody battle for Big D's position.
  • Black and Grey Morality: Pinot Noir is a violent assassin who nevertheless shows himself to have standards compared to the cutthroat murderers, pedophiles, a sadistic drug kingpin, a cannibalistic organ harvester who wants to unleash a Zombie Apocalypse, and a child trafficking preacher who is an immortal worshipper of the Old Ones.
  • Body Horror: Greta's experiments, from what Pinot glimpses at, are this, with limbs growing out of one woman's mouth, a man's eyes and lips being sewn shut, and a human blob with two faces.
  • Butt-Monkey: Poor Schultz gets no respect with Greta, constantly enduring her pain, which includes verbal abuse, threats of gutting him for the slightest failure, strangling him for interrupting her experimentation of Pinot, and even castrating him for letting Pinot go.
  • Canada, Eh?: Crank Gibson hails from Calgary, Alberta, Canada, and is very proud of his heritage, to the point where he has a Calgary city flag hanging in his office.
  • Can't Take Criticism: CrunkFam, who would rather bust their critics' heads open than actually take advice for their music.
  • Cerebus Syndrome: The story, while having its share of dark moments, is for the most part an over-the-top fest of dark comedy and parody. Then the ending of Chapter 6 happens, and the tone darkens considerably, continuing that way into the next chapter.
  • Chubby Chaser:
    • Implied with Schultz. He would've found Greta's physique more appealing had she not been a disgusting person with a belly full of human flesh.
    • The narrator is implied to also be one, referring to Himiko's actual, bloated figure as "beautiful".
  • Corrupt Corporate Executive: Crank runs Pleasure Island like a sweatshop, forcing people to create the deadly drug Pleasure to be sold on the streets of Kaos, having their hearts detonated if they were to make a mistake. If that wasn't enough, the families of his workers are secretly murdered to make them continue working, his drug dealers also have explosives attached to their hearts, and Crank later on decides that it's better to just detonate his entire factory just because he wasn't thinking straight. Plus, Crank is secretly assisting Greta in a plan that would involve world domination, having been promised money and co-ownership of the world should her plan succeed.
  • Crapsack World: With a town called "Kaos", one isn't expecting sunshine and rainbows. Murder, crime, rapists, organ harvesting, child trafficking, and a special night where all of that and more commences.
  • Crazy-Prepared: Pinot knew that CrunkFam would be coming after him after he threw the brick at their boombox, so he grabbed his shotgun and waited for them to arrive at the front door.
  • Crippling Castration: Greta castrates Schultz after he lets Pinot escape her lab.
  • Creepy Monotone: Both Mr. Pow and Mr. Blam talk like this.
  • Curb-Stomp Battle: Timmy's battle with Richie's gang in Chapter 3. Four dangerous, armed criminals against one butler with a gun and a knife. Timmy wins.
  • Death by Irony: Melon's Death. "He's gonna pop that sucker's head open like a-"
  • Deconstructive Parody: Of dark action B-movies and Wide Open Sandbox video games. The main character isn't a selfless hero or vigilante, but a psychopath who wants some sleep and is willing to take down everybody in order to do so. Action tropes are constantly being questioned and lampooned by either the narration, or the characters, even Pinot's more dumber decisions are mocked by the narrator. At one point, Pinot even questions on whether or not he's murdering these people for fun, or because he actually wants some rest. However, most of the humor involves amping up the insanity of certain action tropes for comedy.
  • Deep South: Kleetus speaks in a very Southern accent. Except it's all an act, as his actual accent is British.
  • Did You Just Punch Out Cthulhu?: The zombified Pinot ends up suplexing the titan-sized Christopher by grabbing one of its tentacles and bending backwards. And if that wasn't enough, he's able to launch him in the air and tear his heart out.
  • Disproportionate Retribution: Pinot decides to kill everybody he can find in town simply because he can't get some rest.
  • The Dog Bites Back: After facing countless physical and verbal abuse from her, to the point of getting traumatized, Schultz is the one to kill Greta for good.
  • Dreadful Musician: CrunkFam are described as such by Pinot and everybody else.
  • Driven to Suicide: At the end, once Pinot has accomplished everything and gets some sleep, his alarm goes off after a minute of sleep. He then grabs a gun and blows his own brains out.
  • Drowning My Sorrows: Big D does this after all his and Greta's attempts to capture Pinot fail, with D still feeling misery over the death of his son. By the time Pinot encounters him, he's a drunken mess.
  • Dual Wielding:
    • Pinot prefers using two pistols.
    • Melon LaMar takes this up a notch by being able to dual wield every weapon.
  • Dude, Where's My Respect?: Greta thinks that D should treat her with more respect and credibility after pitching the idea of Purge Night to him.
  • Eldritch Abomination: Christopher turns into a giant one after sacrificing Clements to Shub-Niggurath.
  • Eldritch Location: One possible interpretation of the Torturer's hideout. Despite it being about a three floor building on the outside, it took Pinot a long time just to walk down an enormous amount of stairs, plus all the surreal torture moments and whatnot.
  • Embarrassing Nickname: Pinot really hates being called "The Moonface Killer", as it makes him insecure about his pale skin.
  • Even Evil Has Loved Ones:
    • D maybe be ruthless, but he truly cares for his son, Junior. The death of his son marks the second half of the story, turning D into a depressed, easily manipulated bastard.
    • Himiko may kidnap people to be used in her fighting tournaments, and even has some genetically enhanced to become monstrous fighters, but she sincerely loves her father, even remembering the day of his burial before her own death.
    • The Master Torturer is a dreaded being with a knack for, well, torture, but he legitimately cared for his son, and it's implied that his son's death broke him.
    • Subverted with Kleetus. In Chapter 7, he admits to Clements that he was going to spare him from his upcoming apocalypse, but because he found out his secret and killed his intended sacrifice victim, he casually tells him that he'll just have to use him for the sacrifice instead.
  • Even Evil Has Standards:
    • While D may be a ruthless mob boss, he does not tolerate rapists in his gang. Especially ones who rape his own members.
    • Pinot Noir, a psychotic hitman, believes Greta's human experiments to be horrific and disturbing. He later finds Schultz's forced castration to also be frightening.
    • Cruelly subverted with Kleetus. He knows it's bad to sell his children to obvious pedophiles, and feels disgusted by them... if they didn't pay him well. Then they're allowed to do whatever they want with them.
  • Evil Brit: Kleetus' actual accent.
  • Evil Chancellor: What Greta essentially becomes after D breaks down after the death of Junior, giving her boss advice on how to capture Noir, while knowing that he would obey her suggestions out of desperation.
  • Excuse Plot: Pinot's sleepless rampage is really just a silly excuse for action, gore, explosions, and other over the top scenarios. Interestingly, there is a plot in the background, mainly revolving around Big D, his cohorts, and a separate one involving Kleetus. But because we're seeing a majority of the story through Pinot, none of these are given much gravitas, with Pinot not even being aware they're going on.
  • Explosive Leash: Somewhat. Crank sews explosives in his employees'—both the chemists and dealers—hearts, detonating them should they give away his location or fail at their jobs.
  • Expy: Big D is one toward Wilson Fisk, specifically the one played by Michael Clarke Duncan, with elements of Marsellus Wallace thrown in.
  • Face Death with Dignity: Himiko dies while calm and accepting of her fate, while also tearfully recollecting the day of her father's burial. Compared with the other people Pinot killed before her, this was a more dignified death.
  • Fat Bastard:
    • Greta has a large beer gut containing mainly the remains of human organs.
    • Big D also has quite a rotund figure, and isn't exactly the nicest guy in the world, especially after the death of his son.
    • Himiko is revealed to be more selfish and greedy than she lets on, as well as more fatter than she appears.
  • Fan Disservice: Greta, from her grotesque appearance, her personality, and her eating habits/diet.
  • Fingore:
    • Jerrel's hand is blown off by Pinot's shotgun.
    • Timmy slices the fingers off of Richie's hand before killing him.
  • Faux Affably Evil:
    • Crank seems very polite and calm while talking to Clark, but that's all just a mask to hide his sociopathic tendencies. He completely loses it all near the end of his chapter.
    • Greta at points comes across as kind of silly, what with her somewhat broken English and jokes. This is despite the fact that she's a violent, temperamental, repugnant, cruel woman who does unspeakable acts of villainy just to get her way.
  • For the Evulz: The reason why Christopher Cogswell has participated in things like genocide, serial killings, witch hunts, and human trafficking; to satiate his boredom.
  • Forced to Watch:
    • According to Schultz, after Greta castrated him for letting Pinot go, she forced him to watch as she ate his severed penis.
    • From the same chapter, Mr. Blam was forced to watch as Christopher drained the youth out of Alexander just to extend his immortality.
  • Frame-Up: Greta does this to Pinot by brutally murdering Junior, pinning the blame on him and allowing D to become both broken and willing to bend to her every will. That, and it allowed her to have an excuse to bring Pinot back to her and continue experimenting on him.
  • Frickin' Laser Beams: Both Melon's Fabricator gun and his own laser dong from Chapter 3.
  • Friend to All Children: Downplayed. While Pinot couldn't give a shit about children, as the ones he comes across who end up in danger are just nobodies he doesn't care about, it's his conscience that makes him start caring for the children in distress, becoming one of these in the process.
  • Gilligan Cut: A flashback showcasing how Big D arrived in Kaos when he was young ends with him hoping to live a better life than the one he had a day ago. The next sentence has D, in the present, getting drunk, feeling miserable, and having lost everything in his empire all because he couldn't let go of his son's death, and even allows Pinot to kill him.
  • Genre Shift: While most of the story is considered action with elements of surrealism, comedy, and science fiction, Chapter 7 introduces two genres not seen throughout the story.
    • Lovecraftian themes. Christopher is a follower of Shub-Niggurath, and seeks to use her powers to make him a god above mankind.
    • Fantasy elements are introduced, specifically black magic, which allowed Christopher to maintain his immortality.
    • Chapter 8 involves the story turning into a giant monster film, with a miniature size zombified Pinot tackling the large, transformed, eldritch Christopher.
  • Gorn: The story doesn't shy away from the amount bloodshed and carnage committed by everybody. Especially prominent in Chapter 5 when Pinot transforms into a beast that slays countless goons in creatively violent ways, painting most of the room with blood.
  • Greed: A recurring theme of the work is criminals using people as a way to earn money, whether it be as fighters, as organ carriers, as playthings for pedophiles, and as slave labor.
  • Groin Attack:
    • Pinot shoots one of Carl Gangrew's members in the groin point blank with a shotgun.
    • Big D shoots Jerrel in the groin with his solid gold desert eagle.
  • Guns Akimbo: One of Pinot's preferred methods of attacking are firing his twin pistols.
  • Hell Is That Noise: People under the affects of Pleasure who have not taken another dose of it will experience an ongoing, horrifying siren noise that drives them insane until they take another dose.
  • Herr Doktor: Greta Ludwig von Hertz is a German woman who harvests organs for a living.
  • Hoist by His Own Petard:
    • Crank Gibson is killed by his sex slave Maggie while overdosed on his own Pleasure.
    • The Master Torturer is killed by Pinot thanks to getting all the blood drained out of his system thanks to one of his own torture devices.
  • Hope Spot: In Chapter 6, it looks as though Alexander will successfully lead the captured children to freedom... that is until Kleetus arrives and kills everybody but Alexander. This was actually invoked by Kleetus, who wanted to give Alexander hope and shatter it all for nothing but his own enjoyment.
  • Hot Scientist: Averted with Greta, who's disgusting and unkempt, both on the inside and outside.
  • Human Traffickers: Kleetus Klementine secretly runs a child trafficking operation where children are kidnapped and sold to various people.
  • Hyperspace Arsenal: Melon is a non-video game example. Within his coat, he's somehow able to carry two uzis, two short-range shotguns, two revolvers, and two rocket launchers.
  • I Love the Dead: Richie Sallinger, a pedophile who loves having sex with deceased children.
  • I'm a Humanitarian: Greta, to the point where often she often eats brains as a light snack, and devours organs deemed unsellable.
  • I'm Standing Right Here: D says that he values his son's life over his own follower's lives, even that of Timmy. Timmy, who was standing right next to him, lets out a loud sigh of annoyance.
  • Immortality: Kleetus is revealed to be immortal, and not even named Kleetus, but Christopher. He achieves this by draining children of their youth and placing it into him.
  • Infant Immortality: Completely averted. Junior witnesses the corpses of several children when he's trapped in the Richie's orphanage, and later on several children are killed by Kleetus, who knew that they were going to escape their cages.
  • Irony: Despite being Canadian, Crank Gibson, out of all the gang leaders Pinot chose to kill that night, is easily the worst, most repulsive figure Pinot's faced.
  • Jack the Ripper: Kleetus, real name Christopher, is revealed to have been the infamous serial killer, having killed those prostitutes to satiate his boredom.
  • Jerkass: Jerrel is an unpleasant man who not only insults everybody around him, but he's also a racist rapist.
  • Kaiju: What Christopher ends up becoming thanks to his pact with Shub-Niggurath.
  • Karmic Death: Crank is injected with his own doses of Pleasure, and killed by his own child sex slave while experiencing the nightmares he put his customers through.
  • Kevlard: Pinot couldn't properly punch Himiko in the stomach due to his fist bouncing off her flab.
  • Kill 'Em All: Out of all the named characters in the story only Penelope, Maggie, Timothy, and Schultz are left alive.
  • Killed Offscreen:
    • Melon LaMar, though it's at least implied that he was shot in the head.
    • Poor Junior is brutally murdered by Greta offscreen. However, we see the remains what what she did to him, and they aren't pretty to say the least.
  • Knight of Cerebus: Kleetus Klementine is far more darker than all the other villains, who are at least entertainingly over the top, goofy, or have at least one redeeming quality. Not him. Kleetus' actions are played far more seriously, his child trafficking operation actually portrayed as horrific and sad. His sections serve as some of the most darkest parts of the story.
  • Knight Templar: Kleetus' public persona is this, advocating the brutal murders of all criminals or people who look like they could be a criminal. Ironic considering he's a criminal himself.
  • Knockout Gas: Junior gets a whiff of this twice.
  • Last Episode, New Character: The epilogue introduces Deacon, aka "Deke", a mysterious man in black who has captured Pinot's corpse and is bringing him back to his superiors.
  • Large Ham: Everyone has their moments, but Pinot, Greta, and Crank especially stand out as the hammiest.
  • Lemony Narrator: The narration is a character on its own, often speaking their opinion on several characters, and even lampshades a good chunk of the story.
  • Light Is Not Good: Big D wears a white suit, but he rules the city from his criminal underground, and is one of the people behind Purge Night.
  • Loads and Loads of Characters: Multiple characters are introduced per chapter, though they're often dead by the end of their introductory chapter.
  • Loves the Sound of Screaming: Heavily implied to be the reason why Greta loves experimenting on living people. When asked by Pinot why she doesn't experiment on her corpses, she responds by saying they don't scream.
  • Mad Doctor: Greta could count as one, except she doesn't have a PhD, what with her obsession with human experimentation and her knowledge of collecting organs from corpses.
  • Manly Tears: Deconstructed. D starts shedding a few tears after his son gives him a "Reason You Suck" Speech. One of D's bodyguards starts chuckling at the picture of his hardened boss crying. D notices and murders him by bashing and scraping his head against the wall.
  • The Master: The Master Tortuerer from Chapter 6.
  • Meaningful Name: The sadistic Greta's last name is von Hertz—pronounced as "Hurts".
  • Mindscrew: Chapter 6 is mostly this, thanks to representing dreams. Was what Pinot had seen inside the Torturer's building real, or was he just imagining the events inside? Pinot himself even questions whether the building or the entire story was nothing but a bad dream he's having.
  • My God, What Have I Done?: Subverted for laughs. After Pinot transforms back into a human after his time as a muscular murderer, he glances at his blood-stained hands in horror... only to realize who awesome his new form is and how much fun he had killing those people.
  • Names to Run Away from Really Fast: The town is named Kaos. That town is a Wretched Hive that makes Roanapur looks like My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic.
  • Never Heard That One Before: Pinot gets annoyed when one of Himiko's servants offers him pinot noir as a joke. He even says this word-for-word.
  • New Job as the Plot Demands: Parodied with Penelope. She mainly works as a bartender, but she's also a professional doctor, audiobook narrator, dry cleaner, ammunitions marketer, telemarketer, bomb disposer, and contract painter.
  • No Celebrities Were Harmed: Jerrel is clearly based on Andy Dick, right down to looks, personality, alcoholism, and the various sexual assault accusations.
  • No Name Given:
    • Red, only referred to as such because of her red hair.
    • The Master Torturer is just that.
  • Not-So-Well-Intentioned Extremist: Crank Gibson claims that his Pleasure gives people what they want in the form of an escapist utopia away from the crapsack city of Kaos, but given how the drug practically forces people to buy more Pleasure in order to avoid living their worst nightmares and being driven to insanity, its shown that he's only exploiting the citizen's desires for profit, rather than out of genuine altruism.
  • Obfuscating Stupidity: From Chapter 5, Miss Himiko's innocent, dough eyed, Japanese Moe girl personality she shows off as the announcer is far from the more cynical, swearing, American accented personality that is truly hers.
  • Of Corsets Funny: In Chapter 5, Himiko's svelte figure is actually a facade thanks to a large corset, hiding the fact that she's actually quite obese.
  • O.O.C. Is Serious Business: Mr. Pow and Blam talk in a very stoic way, with both referring to each other and others as "Mr. X" at the end of every sentence. So when all Mr. Blam could say while watching the death of Mr. Pow is a loud "No!", then that means his death hit him hard.
  • Organ Theft: One of Big D's main sources of income.
  • Orphanage of Fear: The Mother's Keep Orphanage, a dark, abandoned building where Richie Sallinger and his gang hang out and murder children.
  • Papa Wolf: Big D is very protective of his son, Junior.
  • Pet the Dog: Pinot may be a crazed hitman, but protecting Maggie and giving her to Penelope for protection shows that he's not totally uncaring.
  • The Pig Pen: Due to working next to dead bodies and refusing to bathe or clean herself thanks to her lack of smell, Greta is seen by many as repulsive.
  • Politically Incorrect Villain:
    • Jerrel is implied to be racist, as he accidentally refers to D as a "Nigger".
    • Melon is also not fond of Canada.
    • Crank is racist towards Big D, not helped by the fact that D is an enemy of his.
    • Greta refers to Big D as a "baboon" in Chapter 7.
  • Pretty Fly for a White Guy: The boys who comprise CrunkFam, who make rap mishmash albums and talk like black people, right down to saying the N-word.
  • Psycho Supporter: Kleetus, real name Christopher, is revealed to be one for the Outer God Shub-Niggurath.
  • Rasputinian Death: Jerrel, throughout Chapter 2, gets his hand blown off, his other hand run over by a limousine, gets one of his arm bones snapped, gets kicked so hard in the torso that his ribs shatter, gets his dick shot off, before finally culminating in his head exploding via a bullet to the brain.
  • Reality Ensues: Quite a bit for a story that's ludicrously over the top.
    • Pinot's constant vomiting thanks to a combination of coffee scotchka and the fact that all the adrenaline is building up is ruining his body, combined with his lack of sleep.
    • Pinot's act of staying up in the wee hours of the night starts to take its toll on him later on in the story. He starts feeling drowsy, tired, and unfit to do a lot of fighting.
    • After Crank detonates his employees' heart bombs, he suddenly realizes that he would need to hire over 100 more people, which would end up costing him more money and time, meaning that his business would be heavily affected by this.
    • Once Pinot kills Red and aims his weapon at the final three members of her posse, the three gunmen just throw their weapons down on the floor and call it quits, as they have no longer have a leader, and Pinot had already killed nine of their own, so why bother trying to fight him?
    • Similar to the above, in Chapter 7 Timmy quits D's gang along with everybody else because of D's anger and grief destroying his own business, and his minions.
    • Schultz getting castrated by Greta is shown in Chapter 7 to have genuinely traumatized him, to the point where he has a breakdown once he recalls the event to Pinot.
    • After Greta announces her plan to Pinot involving creating an empire of zombies and rule over it as their queen, Pinot tells her how stupid and illogical her plan is. This causes Greta to become so mad, she cancels the plan entirely.
  • "Reason You Suck" Speech: Junior gives one to D in Chapter 3.
  • Rule of Cool: 50% of the story runs on this logic.
  • Rule of Funny: The other 50% runs on this.
  • Running Gag: Pinot passing out for contrived reasons, to the point where he lampshades it at one point before he passes out again.
  • Sacrificial Lamb: Jerrel exists mainly to showcase Big D's ruthlessness and Greta's position of harvesting organs.
  • Self-Imposed Challenge: In-Universe. Pinot, while fighting Red and her goons at an arcade, decides to intentionally kill them without using bullets so that he may save his ammunition for a fight that actually matters to him.
  • Sequel Hook: Big D's position is up for grabs in a ruined Kaos, and the enigmatic Deacon has taken Pinot's corpse to be used for some mysterious project of sorts.
  • Shoot the Shaggy Dog:
    • In Chapter 6, Alexander's painstaking plan to escape with the kids is foiled when Kleetus arrives and kills them all.
    • The ending. Pinot accomplishes his goal, tackles a giant monster, and gets the sleep he's been craving... until his alarm clock wakes him up after only a minute of rest. Pinot promptly pulls a gun from his mattress and blows his brains out.
  • Shot to the Heart: Pinot does this whenever he takes coffee scotchka. As tonight's the first time he had ever done this technique, it ends up hurting him.
  • Shotguns Are Just Better: One of Pinot's weapons is a shotgun, which proves quite useful at points.
  • Shout-Out: Dozens upon dozens, from multiple B-movies, to dumb action flicks, to music, to animation.
  • Sinister Minister: Kleetus is one in two ways. He encourages his followers to act violently around supposed criminals, making him a vicious Knight Templar to the public. Behind the scenes, he's a child trafficker who has children kidnapped and sold for money.
  • Sir Swears-a-Lot: While everybody's a little foul mouthed, Pinot himself is the dirtiest of them all, almost every sentence of his containing a curse word of some kind.
  • Skull for a Head: Kind of. Mr. Blam wears a large skull mask over his face.
  • Sleeves Are for Wimps: Penelope says this word-for-word when describing why her lab coat doesn't have sleeves.
  • Smoking Is Cool:
    • Melon smokes a large cigar in his introduction, which he puts out with his own forehead.
    • Red also smokes cigarettes, though she only does it after a successful hit.
  • Smug Snake: Jerrel likes to think he's hot shit, but once he crosses paths with Pinot and messes with Timmy and Big D, he constantly cries and begs for forgiveness.
  • The Stoic: Timmy, one of D's most loyal henchmen, hides his feelings behind his sunglasses and a stone cold frown.
  • Suck E. Cheese's: Happy Rat's Magical Funland of Fun is a pretty gross place, with broken down animatronics who sing songs with disturbing titles, a disgusting ball pit, a tube maze area that tells children how to finish it, children being repeatedly captured by Mr. Pow and Mr. Blam, and a character named Penis Pete.
  • The Starscream: What Greta hopes to become by the end of Purge Night, planning on killing D once she acquires Pinot and run D's business while her ultimate plan slowly starts to come together.
  • Static Character: Pinot starts the story a selfish psychopath and ends the story as just that. He even lampshades this at the end, by telling Penelope that he doesn't feel any different than when he started.
  • Stupid Evil: Deconstructed with Crank Gibson. He thinks that rather than send his men out to kill Pinot when he invades his factory and releases his employees from their collars, that it would be a better idea to just blow every single one of his employees up in hopes that one of those explosions would kill Pinot. Instead, the whole thing results in everybody in the factory dying except Pinot. Crank realizes what a colossal mistake he made and thinks about how his actions just affected his business operation. Even the narration points out how stupid he was.
  • Stylistic Suck: CrunkFam's music, which contains way too many music genres crammed into one mixtape, and their lyrics aren't exactly creative, either.
  • Stuff Blowing Up: Pinot's attack on Melon's meet-up in Chapter 3 involves loads of explosions, and loads of gibs.
  • Take That!:
    • CrunkFam is meant as an attack on egotistical, horrendous white rappers who can't take criticism.
    • Crank Gibson is one towards John Kricfalusi. Both are selfish, racist Canadian businessmen who run their businesses like tyrants, have very short tempers, work their employees to the bone, and are disturbing child groomers.
    • A more lighthearted example, also from Chapter 4, is Unleash the Rat, a show that tried to turn the lovable Happy Rat gang into a dark and edgy action show, mocking not only poor attempts at making darker kids shows based on cuter franchises, but also Loonatics Unleashed. Granted, Happy Rat wasn't exactly "soft" to begin with given the songs they sing.
  • Third Line, Some Waiting: There's a lot of plots happening in this story. The first being Pinot's sleepless rampage and taking down every crime syndicate in Kaos. The other plot concerns Big D and his doctor Greta, who plans on murdering him after acquiring Pinot for her own personal project. But while these two plots are at least linked together, the same can't be said for a third subplot that involves the priest Kleetus and his child trafficking operation, which as of yet, has nothing to do with the main overarching story.
  • Through the Eyes of Madness: We get a brief insight as to how Big Daddy Donny views the world. He sees Pinot as a frightening tentacle creature that must be destroyed, which is probably how he sees everybody else.
  • Those Two Guys: Mr. Pow and Mr. Blam, mercenaries for hire who work for Kleetus in his child trafficking operation.
  • Tome of Eldritch Lore: The Necronomicon itself makes an appearance in Chapter 7.
  • Torso with a View: During Pinot's battle with the assassin Red, Pinot defeats her by launching a foam bitch fist through her stomach, creating a clean hole that ends up killing her.
  • Torture Technician:
    • A whole gang of them show up in Chapter 6.
    • The Master Torturer from the same chapter is also a Deconstruction of this. He's not a complete sadist like all the other people who serve him, and he himself was once tortured until he cracked, which led to the death of his son and everybody else close to him. He even refers to Pinot as like a brother to him should he survive his methods.
  • Unusually Uninteresting Sight: Pinot's next-door neighbor doesn't bat an eyelash to the amount of bloodshed he committed a few seconds ago.
  • Vigilante Man: Pinot is not one of these, only killing people because he's told to, and because he just wants to get some peace and quiet. Parodied during his conversation with one of Himiko's servants, where he paints his backstory as being one, even thinking back to every single cliche he could remember off of the back of various comic books.
  • Villain Protagonist: Make no mistake. Pinot may be taking out criminals more evil than him, but he's still a selfish psychopath who's only killing people so he can get some sleep, rather than out of genuine altruism.
  • Villainous Breakdown:
    • Crank, after realizing that he had just killed everybody in his factory and had failed to kill Pinot, while also thinking about what he must do now that he had stupidly killed off everyone working in his factory, goes on a rampage, bashing his desk in, snorting a lot of cocaine, and even threatening to kill the little Maggie.
    • Greta goes through a massive string of these after Pinot tells her the reality of her zombification plan by screaming, stomping her feet, ordering Schultz to burn the children she got from Klementine, and doing the act herself once Shultz proves to be too kind to do it. She becomes even more crazed after Pinot blows her up, doing whatever she can to kill Pinot as an act of revenge.
  • Villainous Rescue: The mysterious cyborg ninja has saved Pinot from death twice. Pinot himself even asks the ninja on whether or not he actually wants to kill him.
  • Vomit Indiscretion Shot: Pinot spends some scenes vomiting his guts out thanks to the adrenaline and the coffee scotchka injections.
  • The Von Trope Family: Greta Ludwig von Hertz, to emphasize her German heritage.
  • We Hardly Knew Ye: Richie lasts only one scene before getting killed by Timmy.
  • Woman in White: The little Maggie, Crank Gibson's former sex slave.
  • World of Jerkass: Almost everybody in the story is an asshole, a murderer, a psychopath, or worse, all perfectly willing to murder one another or do horrific things to children.
  • Would Hurt a Child: A recurring theme throughout the story.
    • Kleetus Klementine and his child trafficking operation. It really speaks for itself. Then there's his slaughtering of kids at the end of Chapter 6, also the revelation that he absorbs children's youth until they turn into dried husks in order to extend his immortality.
    • Richie Sallinger loves murdering children and having sex with their corpses.
    • Greta at one point thought about eating Junior, with the narration mentioning how she hadn't had the taste of children in a while. To say nothing of what she does to Junior in Chapter 4, along with attempting to burn her bought children after realizing that her zombification plan is doomed to fail.
    • Crank Gibson not only keeps the child Maggie around his office to act as his pet, but is also willing to kill her in front of Pinot when he invades his headquarters.
  • Wretched Hive: Kaos is a massive one, filled with all kinds of lunatics and parasites who really come alive every Purge Night.
  • Yank the Dog's Chain: In Chapter 6, just when the kids are about to leave their prison and escape the church, Kleetus arrives and guns everybody sans Alexander down.
  • You Have Failed Me: While he doesn't come right out and say it, Kleetus killing Mr. Pow and preventing Mr. Blam from going to comfort his dying partner is essentially this.
  • You Have GOT To Be Kidding Me: Pinot says a variation of this when he sees Melon pull out two rocket launchers from his jacket.
  • You Killed My Father: Parodied. When Pinot encounters the cyborg ninja for the final time, Shinjoku the ninja reveals that he's after Pinot because he killed his pet mosquito right before his death.
  • You Need a Breath Mint:
    • Pinot tells Greta this when he meets her for the first time.
    • At one point, D actually offers Greta a breath mint due to her disgusting breath.
  • You Wouldn't Hit a Guy with Glasses?:
    • Jerrel tries this tactic when Timmy starts beating him up. In response, Timmy calmly removes Jerrel's glasses and starts beating him up.
    • Later on when D threatens Greta with a beating for her plans to capture Pinot failing, Greta pulls down her goggles and says an alteration of the phrase. D tries to do it anyways.
  • Your Head Asplode:
    • Jerrel's head explodes after D shoots it.
    • Jacky, one of Richie's men, has this happen to him courtesy of Timmy.
    • Implied with what happened to Melon LaMar.
    • Defied by Pinot when he encountered Big D. He intentionally shoots him in a part of the head that doesn't cause it to explode, all as a way of giving him a more dignified death.
  • Zombie Apocalypse: What Greta plans to cause throughout the entire story, all so she can rule over a world of the undead.
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