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Funny / Aladdin: The Series

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"Tails - you lose your head!"

  • Iago getting turned into a Frilled Lizard in Do the Rat Thing. There are no words.
    Iago: I could've said "If you're a street rat, then I'm the world's richest parrot!" But what do I say?! "I'm a frilled lizard!"
    • Also from Do The Rat Thing, there's Jasmine's stubborn insistence that Aladdin will recognize her no matter what, despite the fact that she's... you know... been transformed into a rat. Not only does Iago get all sorts of sarcastic about it, but just to make extra obvious that she's deluded she accidentally ruins her own case halfway through by absentmindedly scratching herself with her hind legs like... well... a rat.
      Jasmine: There’s still hope, Iago. Aladdin will recognize me, and he’ll have Genie turn us back.
      Iago: Yeah! That’s worth zero point nothing on the Hope-ometer.
      Jasmine: He loves me. He’ll know me no matter what shape I’m in. You’ll see. (scurries over to Aladdin) Aladdin! It’s me, Jasmine! A magic mirror turned me into a rat! (switch to Al's POV; all he can hear are squeaks coming out of Rat-Jasmine's mouth, eventually he picks her up and tosses her aside) He just tossed me aside like a… (watches Aladdin and Wazoo leave) like a rat.
      (Iago gives Jasmine a look that reads "why am I not surprised?")
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    • Like how Disney played with a similar situation in The Princess and the Frog, a lot of the humor in Do The Rat Thing comes from taking a character who isn't usually the butt of jokes when they're human and putting them through the wringer once they're not any more. Between Jasmine and Iago's misfortunes, plus everything it does to Prince Wazu, it's one of the slapstick-iest episodes in the series.
    • Jasmine's clever plan to catapult herself and Iago into a melon cart.
      Jasmine: Iago! (sees watermelon merchant) Isn’t that the man who delivers melons to the palace?
      Iago: Yeah, why?
      Jasmine: Where there’s a melon man, there’s dinner! (scurries with Iago following behind)
      Iago: Hey! Slow down! Remember? I don’t have wings anymore!
      Jasmine: Come on, Iago. We’ve got a melon cart to catch! (sees the cart driving away) Oh, no!
      Iago: Forget it. We’ll never catch it now. There’s no hope! Might as well throw in the towel! Cash in our chips!
      Jasmine: We’re not beat yet! (grabs Iago and drags him toward a man under a sheet held hanging from two wooden poles, held down by a peg.)
      Iago: Would ya quit yankin’ me around like that! You know, lizards have rights too. (Jasmine pulls him onto the sheet and starts gnawing at the rope holding it down) Hey! What are ya doin’? … Oh, I see! You’re gonna use this thing like a slingshot, and…uh-oh! (Jasmine nibbles it down, and they are slung directly into one of the watermelons on the merchant’s cart, leaving Rat-shaped and Lizard-shaped holes in the melons.) Just when I think there are no new kinds of pain...I find one.
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    • Every time the rat tries to sneak into the courtyard, Rajah always chases it out. After the rat attempts to sneak in through the wall only to be thwarted by Rajah once again, Genie decides to demonstrate how a "real hunter deals with a rat" and transforms into a hunter and begins shooting all over the place while laughing maniacally until he realizes he went overboard and Rajah, sporting the most priceless expression ever, and Abu slowly peek out from a bush.
      Genie: Well, there I go! I've gotten carried away and alienated everyone again.
    • Jasmine being put through a Baleful Polymorph run as Genie tries to revert her back to normal. Finally, Genie returns Jasmine back to her normal self, except when she leaves, it’s revealed she still has a large rat tail on her butt. Oops...
      • Genie somehow recognizing her and having to be told that she's been turned into a rat.
  • In another episode when Jasmine is forced to stay with a grumpy child king, Aladdin plans to appeal to the king's conscience by saying that her father and mother wish to say goodbye. Genie turns Iago and Abu into humans. Iago comes bustling in with a ridiculous British accent and fake crying about missing "my only daughter".
    • What really makes the king well up is Genie turning himself into Jasmine's "pet wallaby Edgar".
    • Jasmine gets a rather Crosses the Line Twice one reaction when Aladdin says her parents want to say goodbye. As she says "My Mother?", you can tell she's wondering just how Aladdin pulled that one off.
  • In Hero with a Thousand Feathers, Iago once abandoned Agrabah to the hands of a vicious demon he had accidentally freed, and decided to spend time on a tropical island. But then he's shocked by the arrival of his conscience (basically Iago with a halo) whom he apparently locked up and threw into the ocean at some point. Iago's conscience orders him to go back and fix his mistake or else. At that point Iago wakes up and figures he just had an insane dream, except some old chains just happen to wash up on shore.
  • In "Never Say Nefir", Aladdin is knocked out unconscious, and Carpet slaps him repeatedly to wake him up. This was used again as Stock Footage in "Web of Fear".
  • In The Secret of Dagger Rock there's this little gem where Mozenrath proves it's very possible to be a Deadpan Snarker even when you're Chewing the Scenery.
    Aladdin: You lost this battle the moment you made Jasmine mad.
    Mozenrath: Oh no! I've angered the princess.
    Aladdin: You don't get it. I've seen her mad.
    Mozenrath: Oh, should I tremble at the painted toes of her dainty little feet?! I don't think so!
    • Abu and Iago are hesitant on their decision to go and help the heroes, then they finally decide...only to find the action ended hours ago.
      Razoul: It was remarkable, Your Highness.
      Sultan: Not so remarkable, really. After all, Razoul — she is my daughter.
      Aladdin: My hero. (He and Jasmine lean for a kiss, when Genie pushes them apart, looking frantic)
      Genie: Hey, anybody seen our funny little animal sidekicks?
      (Back to Dagger Rock — Abu and Iago have just arrived. They're both equipped with guns, knives, arrows ... and ... well, let's just say they're prepared.)
      Iago: Dagger Rock — twelve o'clock high. IT'S SHOWTIME! (Even more weapons burst from the belt he's wearing. Abu follows and does the same thing. But there's nobody in sight.) Where is everybody? I think those shambling, half-dead Mamluk guys gave us bad directions. (They both collapse against the Crystal, with Mozerath and Xerxes trapped inside of it.) Maybe we're supposed to go to Danger Rock, or Dagger, I don't know, like more of a nautical thing...
  • In "Elemental, My Dear Jasmine", Jasmine's reaction to her question about his romantic past. When he says that he's had tons of girlfriends in the past she gets offended and Aladdin immediately takes back what he said as fast as possible.
    • Jasmine getting humiliated as a wave splashes on her, covering her with seaweed. The others can't help laughing at her and she storms off in a huff.
      Aladdin: Jasmine, are you... (desperately trying to suppress his laughter) ...OK?
      Jasmine: It's not funny!
      Iago: Okay, we're not laughing at you. Well, actually, yes, we are! AHAHAHA!
      (Genie and Abu begin laughing. Aladdin wants to laugh, but tries to stop the others.)
      Aladdin: Genie...
      (Aladdin then looks at Jasmine again, whose pants have now ballooned out with water. She grabs the material and pulls, spilling water and fish out of the pant legs and onto the beach. Aladdin joins the others, laughing hysterically)
      Jasmine: (furious) Ohhhhhhh… (storms off)
    • Jasmine meets Saleen who has her octopus Armand give dye the princess' hair Ariel red.
      Saleen: She looks like any other princess under the sea.
    • A merchant tries to sell Saleen a fish... whom she apparently knew.
      Saleen: Charlie? You reckless fool.
    • The guys trick Saleen in a fake date setting.
      Saleen: (looks at a menu) Hmmm... I don't know. Surprise me. (A pitfall opens below her seat; she splashes into the water)
      Aladdin, Genie, Iago, and Abu: SURPRISE!
    • After defeating Armand, Genie hangs him up on a big display rack and has Carpet take photos of him, Iago and Abu like they're on a fishing trip. Meanwhile, Aladdin and Jasmine are struggling with Saleen, and Aladdin has to cry for Genie twice before he realizes what's going on.
      Genie: Everybody smile! Say "Calamari"!
  • In "Caught by the Tale", Abis Mal tells an obvious re-edited version of the stories of Aladdin. He paints out Aladdin as a bald, weak, fat guy and painting himself as a muscle bound invincible man. The two kids he was telling this to obviously don't buy it.
  • At the end of the episode that first introduced Mozenrath, Aladdin and his friends have been manipulated to helping Mozenrath capture a creature, the Thirdac, that eats magic which he plans to use for his own ends. Aladdin is furious and returns to stop Mozenrath. He threatens that he'll release the Thirdac and sic him on Mozenrath if Mozenrath doesn't send it back to where it came from.
    Mozenrath: You wouldn't. You're not that ruthless!
    Aladdin: You're right - I'm not. But he is!
    Iago: And man, do I feel cranky!
  • The opening of the episode "Sneeze the Day" opens with Aladdin, his friends and the guards chasing Amin Damoola in Agrabah. He nearly gets away on on a passing cart, but smacks his head on an arc and falls off. When he gets back up, he sees Genie charging him in football gear. The look on his face is priceless.
    • There is also Amin’s shout outs to the movie.note  Unlike Aladdin in the movie, Amin gets caught rather easily.
    • While Aladdin and Iago are trying to retrieve the cure (called the Orb of Machana) Jasmine and Abu experience the worse from Genie's suffering. Genie's sneezes turn Jasmine into a tree, a Koala, a carrot, the Mona Lisa portrait and quickly back to normal. His sneezing basically causes a lot of trouble, to say the least.
    • Machana(a beetle disguised in several mechanical suits with a similar design(humanoid crocodile, spider and finally griffin) himself is a Deadpan snarker of the highest order. On the second trial, a panicky Iago delivers a classic question when the trial is a "find the dagger under the basket"shell game.
      Machana: (Scratches head for a few seconds) No.
    • After Aladdin and Iago retrieve the Orb of Machana, the guardian of the ruins reveals he's got an entire storage of orbs, muttering how it will take millions of years to get rid of them all.
  • The Lost City of the Sun is full of it.
    • Mozenrath towards his mooks for trying to slink away "while I'm ranting!"
    • "It appears Shamash had quite the sense of humor".
    • Iago getting the sprites to go on strike.
      • And the Mozenrath notices the disguised-as-sprites Genie, Iago, and Abu look odd for sprites.
      Genie-sprite: Uh...we're from Ohio.
  • From the guest villain Chaos (voiced by Matt Frewer): "But I never liked Fate. Predestination goes against the grain. Besides, he cheats at cards".
  • Just about all of “The Flawed Couple”. The Villain Team-Up between the two Laughably Evil Abis Mal and Mechanikles is an absolute joyride from beginning to end.
    • Iago's crowning moment of snark: after the gang is trapped in a mine by Abis Mal and Mechanikles, Genie questions whether going deeper in would be a good idea, stating that it might be a trap. Iago, in his own inimitable style, flicks Genie a coin and says, "Here's a dinar. INVEST IN A CLUE!!! WE ARE TRAPPED!!! THEREFORE, THIS IS A TRAP!!!"
    • And later on in that same episode, after he's affected by one of Mechanikles and Abis Mal's mood stones, Iago starts hitting on Jasmine.
    • Jasmine, when affected by another mood stone, is unexpectedly hilarious when she becomes jealous of everything and everyone. She gets jealous of Iago and Carpet ("I wish I could fly!"), of the giant mechanical monster that attacks them ("Ooooh, I wish I were a fearsome engine of destruction!") and of Aladdin and the Genie when they fall down a steep cliff ("Ooooh, I wish I were plummeting to my doom!")
  • This exchange from "Of Ice and Men" after Aladdin offers Frigeed to come back to the palace with them.
    Iago: This is a bad idea, Al! The guy's got the reasoning faculties of a boiled cabbage!
    Aladdin: Don't worry about it! I got us through the ice palace, and I can handle it!
    (Iago gives a perfectly timed Facepalm)
    • And at the end of the episode, Jasmine leads Genie, Abu, Iago, and Carpet into barraging Aladdin with snowballs.
  • "Eye of the Beholder":
    • The opening scene in Morbia where Mirage and Fasir are arguing about the former tormenting humanity. Fasir states love always prevails, but Mirage believes it's weak and pathetic. Fasir tells Mirage that no matter what she does, she will never be able to destroy Aladdin and Jasmine's love for each other. Determined to prove Fasir wrong, Mirage gains a fiendish plan.
      Fasir: Why do you persist in tormenting humanity, Mirage?
      Mirage: Why do you persist in tormenting me, Fasir?! You're so tiresome with your hopeless causes!
      Fasir: On the contrary, it's you who have the hopeless cause. Good shall always triumph over evil for love is the strength of good.
      Mirage: Ho, ho! Love! It is no more than a tingly feeling. It is weak!
      Fasir: No. Witness these souls, Mirage. (he opens a portal to reveal Aladdin and Jasmine strolling side by side)
      Jasmine: Hahaha! Oh, Aladdin, you didn't!
      Aladdin: No, Jasmine I really did!
      Fasir: All your spells, all your incantations, all your potions could never destroy their love. (disappears)
      Mirage: How dare you pull your cheap parlor tricks! (suddenly smirks) Never destroy their love? (chuckles maliciously) We'll see about that, Fasir. (turns into a lovely woman) We'll see.
    • Jasmine and Iago are in the marketplace run into a disguised Mirage, selling beauty products. Mirage tries to persuade Jasmine to buy a special product that will make any man love her, but Jasmine declines stating that she already has Aladdin. Mirage goes onto say that he must love her very much, but tries to convince Jasmine that Aladdin only loves her for her beauty and gives Jasmine a lotion stating it will increase her beauty. Iago, meanwhile tries several of Mirage's products on himself.
      Iago: Boring! This is boring!
      Jasmine: You could’ve gone for sugared dates with Aladdin and Abu!
      Iago: No way! I touch one date and wham! I'm bloated for a day! Besides, I’d much rather much be here with you.
      Jasmine: Love you too, Iago.
      Iago: [gasps] Princess, you shouldn't kid around like that. What would people think if they heard ya?
      Mirage: (disguised as a lovely merchant lady) Perhaps they would think she should get a new boyfriend.
      Iago: See?
      Mirage: Something to enhance your radiant beauty, my dear?
      Jasmine You... weren't here just a moment ago.
      Mirage: Oh, the heat can play tricks on the weary shopper. This is where Asha always sells her goods.
      Jasmine: I was sure that...
      Iago: Oh, do you have any shadow? Something to make my beak look smaller?
      Mirage: Perhaps some rose petals from Cairo? Your kiss will win any man you choose.
      Jasmine: I’ve already chosen a wonderful man.
      Iago: Oh! How 'bout an eyebrow thinning agent? Plucking doesn't do diddly.
      Mirage: A young man for the young lady. How nice. I'm sure he loves you very much.
      Jasmine: Yes, he does.
      Mirage: He probably doesn't even notice those wrinkles.
      Jasmine: Wrinkles?
      Mirage: (hands Jasmine a mirror) Oh, oh, small ones. Around the eyes. Hardly noticeable... yet.
      Iago: Yeah, I see 'em. Oh, look. They make a little smiley face.
      Mirage: It's a fact of life, my dear. The pretty face of youth just doesn't stay with us and then the man we love wants another pretty face.
      Iago: (rubbing cream on his beak) She's right. I've seen guys do it. Heck, I’ve done it... several times!
      Jasmine: IAGO!
      Iago: What? I got a problem with commitment. I admit it.
      Jasmine: Well, Aladdin’s not like that. He loves me for me, not just how I look.
      Mirage: Perhaps... but can you be sure? (holds out a fancy bottle) I have a very special lotion I use each night. When I awake in the morning, my beauty is flawless.
      Aladdin: Oh, Jasmine. (appears holding a flower) For you, my darling. I've loved you from the moment I first set eyes on your beautiful face.
      Jasmine: (gasps) You love me... for my beauty?
      Aladdin: Well, yeah!
      Mirage: Take the lotion, my dear. No charge. (places the lotion in Jasmine's bag)
      Jasmine: Um, it's getting late. We should be going.
      Aladdin: Uh, sure.
      Iago: So, notice anything about my beak? (Abu chatters mockingly) "BIG SCHNOZ?!" Who asked you?!
      (Mirage chuckles evilly as she watches the gang leave)
    • That night, Jasmine applies some of the lotion to her face. The next morning, however, she wakes up and sees to her horror that that potion has turned her into a half-snake hybrid creature. It starts with her waist being s-s-nakelike. It may be somewhat disturbing Nightmare Fuel, but it still has quite a lot of funny moments.
      Jasmine: Oh, no! I've overslept! (removes the covers and screams)
      Aladdin: Jasmine! (runs into Jasmine's room) Jasmine, are you alright? (gasps)
      Jasmine: (waist down turned into snake) Help me!
      Aladdin: What-what did this?
      Jasmine: (holds up the lotion) This lotion! That woman in the marketplace gave me this lotion and look what it's done!
      Iago: Cursed cosmetics! I'm doomed! Is my beak sprouting hair!? (Abu clasps his hand over Iago's beak to shut him up. Aladdin rubs Genie's lamp)
      Genie: You have summoned the almighty Genie of the...(sees Jasmine) la... Whoa! Never mind.
      Aladdin: Genie, find the woman who sold this to Jasmine! (holds out bottle for him to see)
      Genie: (has dogs smelling bottle) Get a good whiff, chaps. (dogs start running) The hunt is on! (Five seconds later, Genie reappears in the room) We looked everywhere. Not a trace. Zipp-o! She's history.
      Jasmine: (sobbing) What will I do?
      Aladdin: Don't worry, we'll find a cure.
      Jasmine: What if there isn't one?
      Genie: Why, sure there is! The Tree of Renewal. Its fruit is good for whatever ails you.
      Iago: Wait! Wait a minute! I've heard of this tree! It's impossible to get to!
      Genie: Not impossible! Maybe a little death-defying...."
      Aladdin: I don't care! (takes Jasmine's hand) I swear on my love for you, I will cure you. (they embrace)
      (Meanwhile, in Morbia...)
      Mirage: THE GENIE KNOWS OF THE TREE?! (growls, then calms down) Well, no matter. Go on your quest, Aladdin. Your love is no match for the pitfalls ahead. You will never make it to the Tree of Renewal!
    • Walking through a swamp four Genie clones are carrying Jasmine in a held float.
      Jasmine: Thanks, but I don't really need all this. I'll walk... slither... whatever it is I do.
      Iago: (flies to the empty seat) Well, no sense in lettin' it all go to waste.
      (Iago sits down in Jasmine's seat... then the Genie clones holding it up disappear, and the chair crashes to the ground, resulting in Iago's head ripping through and sticking out of the tarp)
    • Later after Jasmine uses her tail to scare off bandits and Iago congratulates Jasmine for defeating the thieves and tries to convince her to stay the way she is now since her tail can be very handy to use in battle. Jasmine grabs Iago with her tail and pretends it's a good idea and reveals that there is still some of the lotion left, telling him he can become a snake himself. Iago quickly realizing his mistake says no.
      Iago: Boy, Princess, that was some fancy tail work you used back there on those mugger jerks! BOOM! WHACK! You sure ya wanna lose that tail? It comes in handy in tense situations.
      (Jasmine grabs Iago by body with her tail)
      Jasmine: (slyly) Good point, Iago. It is handy. In fact, there's some lotion left. You could have a handy tail, too.
      Iago: AAAH! NO! No! Ha, you're right, Princess! Bad idea! Lose the tail!
    • The Genie turns himself into a hot air balloon to help Jasmine cross a chasm, prompting this line:
      Iago: For once, the Genie bein' an airhead's a good thing.
      • Shortly after they land:
      Genie: Well, here we are safe and sound on terra firma! (stomps on the ground, which crumbles underneath Aladdin, who falls)
    • At the climax, Mirage throwing a fit upon seeing Aladdin turn himself into a snake to stay with Jasmine. Returning to Morbia, She tells Fasir she may have failed but they'll still spend the rest of their lives as snakes. Fasir insists they beat her and restores the tree, to Mirage's dismay.
      Mirage: This can't be! LOVE IS WEAK!! WEAK!! (disappears back into Morbia) How is it possible for love to triumph over such adversity?!
      Fasir: Love is ever-triumphant, Mirage. Aladdin and Jasmine have proven that your hate is no match for their love!
      Mirage: That may be, but they'll suffer for the rest of their lives!
      Fasir: No, they won't. You lost, Mirage. There's no need for them to pay for your defeat. (lets out a magic beam to restore the tree)
      Mirage: No! NO!
    • Then as Al and Jas each take a bite of the Renewal fruit, and both turn human again. Iago looks at the remains of the fruit on the ground.
      Iago: You think that fruit could make my beak a little smaller?
      Abu: No way.
  • Sadira's premiere in "Strike Up the Sand" where she tries to get Aladdin's attention but fails as he was walking with Genie trying to explain how women work.
    Genie: (as a Frenchman) Ah, women, zey appreciate ze little things, n’est ce pas? Like when you notice their hair or their clothing. (They walk past Sadira, who is holding her hair up and has moved her shirt down off of one shoulder. They don’t see her.) Ze appreciate your willingness to lend a hand. (They pass Sadira carrying a heavy chest, but ignore her.) And, what is most of all, ze appreciate le compassion and le understanding. (They pass Sadira, who is crying, but she can’t catch their attention.)
  • "Poor Iago" is filled with funny moments.
    • The beginning of the episode. Iago explains to Abu how he’s been scoping out the palace and discovering the chamber that has gold dust stored right above it. Iago is a bit more short-tempered than normal, and we soon learn why; in all this planning that he’s been doing for this latest scheme, he hasn’t slept in three weeks.
      Iago: The incessant planning, the long nights working ‘til dawn, it’s enough to drive one to the very brink of… of… of… SKOODELY-WOODELY LAND!!!
    • After Abu saves the golden feathered Iago from drowning in a barrel, Genie restores him...except the feathers on his head are sticking straight up, and Iago has an absolutely insane smile on his face!
    • How Aladdin and the others discover that Iago made good on his “vow of poverty”.
      Aladdin: Wake up, everybody! We’ve been robbed!
      (Abu, Genie, and Carpet wake up to see Aladdin’s hovel completely trashed)
      Genie: Oh, you have to be pretty desperate to rob a place like this!
      Abu: (notices his fez is gone and starts chattering angrily)
      Genie: (looking around the hovel and notices something else is missing) Al, have you seen my Lamp?
      Aladdin: Wait a minute… where’s Iago?
      All: Uh-oh…
    • Later as the angry merchants and guards are vowing to do when they find Iago
      Farouk: We shall tar and feather him!
      Omar: He's already got feathers.
      Farouk: Well... We shall pluck him, then tar and re-feather him!
      (The merchants exit, then the palace guards enter)
      Razoul: We'll roast that bird over a small fire!
      Fazal: Mmmm, roast parrot, my favorite!
      (The guards exit, with Aladdin chasing after them.)
      Aladdin: Hey! You're just supposed to arrest him!
      Genie: (pops out from Al's canteen, sobbing) I miss my Lamp!
    • Then after Iago returns to his greedy ways.
      Iago: These jewels are MINE!
      Aladdin: What about your vow of poverty?
      Iago: Greed almost got me killed. Then poverty almost got me killed. If I'm gonna get it either way, I might as well be rich!
  • In "The Day the Bird Stood Still", Iago realizes that the cursed bath salts he inadvertently used are slowly turning him to stone. While on his own by the fountain, he declares that if he ever gets out of this, he's going to "kiss that stupid monkey". Then he proceeds to go the extra mile and bawls, "I don’t want to be stone! I wanna kiss the monkey!"
    • Then at the end when Iago is finally cured, the first thing he does is kiss Abu hard on the forehead! Seriously, he really DID kiss the monkey!
      Iago: Don't ask me to explain this! MWAH!
  • This line from "The Vapor Chase".
    Iago: The smoke from the fire stole your hat. Of course! Wake me up if anything unusual happens.
    • Aladdin and the gang go to the palace to test his suspicions of the on powder.
      Jasmine: Let me get this straight; you got us out of bed in the middle of the night because Abu had a bad dream?!
      Aladdin: There was strange soot all over the place.
      Abu: Yeah!
      Aladdin: And I think this has something to do with it. (presents powder container)
      Jasmine: Oh, you just won't rest until you prove I was wrong, will you?!
      Aladdin: Jasmine, this has nothing to do with you. I just think we should test it.
      Jasmine: Do whatever you like. (Aladdin opens the container, goes by the fire, and takes out from the container a pinch of powder. He nervously turns to Jasmine) I'm waiting. (Aladdin puts the pinch of powder into the fire and it rises, Abu and Iago take cover...but only a cloud of smoke comes out, then promptly fizzles out) Well, are you satisfied? It worked just like it's supposed to.
      Iago: You just didn't use enough. (snatches the container from Al's hand)
      Aladdin: IAGO!
      (Iago tosses the entire thing into the fire, resulting in a huge blast with enough force to knock the parrot backwards, leaving him pinned against the wall)
      Iago: I've had better ideas...
    • When the smoke creatures grab the Sultan and Genie uses not the best choice in words.
      Genie: Drop the Sultan, buddy! (The smoke demon drops the Sultan, and he falls, but Carpet manages to catch him) I didn't mean that literally.
    • Then as Jasmine checks on her dazed father.
    • Jasmine then admits that she knew Aladdin was right about being suspicious about the powder but was too overconfident to accept it.
      Jasmine: I'm responsible for this mess.
      Aladdin: Don't blame yourself.
      Jasmine: Aladdin, I knew you were right. But I was so excited about helping Agrabah, I guess I just didn't want to listen. (hugs Aladdin) It's all my fault!
      Aladdin: There, there, it's okay.
      Iago: Al, Jas? I hate to quash your emotional circus, kids, BUT WE'VE GOT BIGGER PROBLEMS RIGHT NOW!
    • Jasmine beating the living crap out of Abis Mal when she finds out he tricked her into buying the powder!
      Aladdin: Abis Mal! Haroud! I should've known!
      Jasmine: I can't believe I was taken in by these bandits! You… DOGS! (lunges and tackles Abis Mal)
      Abis Mal: GET OFF ME, PRINCESS! Get her off me!… goh— GET HER OFF!
      Aladdin: Jasmine, stop! Stop Jasmine before she strangles Abis Mal!
    • Then as the Sootanai begins destroying the building sending the ceiling falling. Abis Mal is hugging his loot while everything is collasping around him.
      Abis Mal: I won't abandon my loot! I WON'T! I WON'T! I WON'T!
      Haroud: Then enjoy it... in the valley of the DEAD! (sprints off)
      Abis Mal: Valley of the... WAIT! WAIT FOR ME! (sprints after Haroud)
    • Later as the gang try to hide from the Sootanai monster. As the gang try to hide inside a dark storage area...
      Genie: Sure is dark in here.
      Iago: Yeah, and there's a funny smell here, too. It kinda smells like... like... (Genie lights a fire with his thumb and the room lights up revealing barrels around the gang) ...lamp oil.
      All: LAMP OIL?!
      Aladdin: (shoves Genie's lit thumb into the blue guy's mouth) One spark, and this place will blow like... like...
      Iago: Like it's full of barrels of LAMP OIL!
      Genie: Sorry...
    • As Genie fights the Sootenai and the demon grabs him.
      Genie: Unhand me, foul demon! (Sootenai gets ready to throw him) This is not what I meant, and you know it!
  • Scare Necessities: Is full of hilarious moments. Abu and Iago steal a jeweled box from an ugly merchant lady as a gift for Jasmine and out pops Squirt, a little rabbit-wallaby-gorrilla-like creature who has the power to grant the wish of whoever scares him, allowing him to run away. He grants Aladin's wish of giving Jasmine a locket, and caviar for Iago and Banana Parfait for Abu.
    Iago: Get a load of the craftsmanship on this baby! Check out the roomy interior! (Struggles to open the box) Roomy interior. Hey, ya wanna help me here? Ah! (The box flies open and a creature pops out and hides under a pile of pillows. Gifts appear in Iago and Abu's hands— caviar for Iago, a banana parfait for Abu) Caviar? Banana parfait? (holds up his foot) And a manicure. Whoo! We were just wishin' for this stuff! Where's my vibratin' chair? Hey... this stuff can't be real.
    Abu: (takes a bite of the parfait) Yup, it's real. (dumps the entire thing into his mouth)
    • Then when Iago discovers the creature's power to grant wishes by whoever scares him.
      Iago: First the locket, now this stuff. That animal's got somethin' to do with it. But how? (Rajah approaches. He growls when he sees the creature with Jasmine. The creatures notices him and yelps; a steak appears before Rajah. He takes it and leaves) It happens when he gets scared. He makes stuff appear so he can get away.
      Abu: What?
      Iago: Every time the little squirt gets spooked, he grants a wish. The locket, my caviar, Rajah's dinner. Whatever's your heart's desire.
      Abu: And my parfait!
      Iago: (sighs) Yeah, and your banana parfait.
    • Later Iago and Abu steal Squirt to scare some wishes out of him. Abu is able to scare Squirt, but not Iago—he just makes Squirt laugh!
      Iago: Ahem! Stop with the laughing, already. What, you think I'm funny? Do I amuse you?! I'm not funny. (Holds his wing up to his mouth, like a vampire would his cape. He speaks, ala Dracula) I'm very scary. Really. (His own voice) Ask anyone! (The creature giggles) You dirty little... (stomps away, then pauses, with an idea) ahhh, element of surprise. (He paces, nonchalantly, then turns and leaps into the creature's face, jumping around and making "scary" noises. The creature watches him, a smile on his face. After a few seconds of his, Iago holds his throat, dizzy). Can't breathe. Oh, what am I not doin' right? (Abu, now very fat, sits surrounded by empty parfait glasses. He wobbles over to Iago and Squirt; he makes a funny face and Squirt screams. A banana parfait appears; Abu eats it) OH, LIFE IS SO UNFAIR! I don't wanna be your friend! I want gifts, big expensive gifts! PLEASE FEAR ME!
    • Later Squirt ends up stolen by Amin Damoola who takes more advantage. Squirt grants his wish of pie.
      (Amin sits alone at a table, a upside down pot in front of him. He lifts the pot slightly; Squirt is inside)
      Amin Damoola: Boo! (A pie appears.) Pie! Oh, how I've always wished to taste pie! (He stands, dancing merrily with the pie) The countless times I've failed to filch them from windowsills. This is the happiest day of my— (accidentally hits huge bulky thief Hamar in the face with the pie)
      Hamar: This is the last day of your life, Butterfingers!
    • Iago and Abu are outside of the Thieves Guild while Iago is hesitant to go in, when several thieves run past him and Abu panicking. Iago watches them run away, then looks toward the Skull and Dagger, and he decides to go in the Guild, since there are no thieves to snatch him.
      Iago: Ah, ok, let's review. Out here, safety and poverty. In there, prosperity and death. That's it, I'm not going in!
      Thieves: RUN! (The thieves flee past them, panicking)
      Iago: Okay, I'll go in.
    • Iago shows up to rescue Squirt, but finds a green dragon-like monster that Butterfingers summoned about to eat him. Squirt magically gives the dragon meat, and Amin kicks it away making the dragon angry and it chases him and Amin locks the dragon outside, only for Iago to trick him into opening the door again and the dragon grabs Butterfingers, with Iago and Squirt snickering as they listen to him struggle.
      Iago: Don't just stand there, give him something! This is no time to be brave! Be scared! BE SCARED! (Squirt poofs up some meat and the dragon eats it; Iago grimaces) That's a little close to home.
      Amin Damoola: NO, no stupid! (kicks the chicken away)
      (The monster growls; Amin, realizing what he's done, laughs nervously and raises his hat in salute to the monster. He runs, the monster in pursuit until Amin traps the dragon outside. Amin braces himself against the door; the monster bangs into it, but remains trapped. Amin slaps his hands together; a triumphant theme plays. Then Iago gets an idea. He knocks on the floor.)
      Iago: Mind getting that, Amin?
      Amin Damoola: No problem. (Amin opens the door, only to be snatched by the dragon. Iago slams the door, then he and Squirt brace it. Iago laughs, listening to Amin struggle.) Let me in! Oh, no! Nice dragon! Nice little dragon! Such a pretty little nice dragon! AAAAH! (sound of tearing clothes)
    • Amin then returns with his clothes all wrinkled and torn. Then tries to scare Squirt again...and Squirt turns into a huge beast or so it seems.
      Amin Damoola: (dazed with his clothes torn exposing his spotted undergarments) I'm alright! But you won't be!
      Iago: You'll never get away with this. (Amin stuffs him into a pot) Abu's getting help! He runs like the wind! (Squirt notices Genie around a corner; Genie brings his finger over his lip to quiet Squirt)
      Amin Damoola: Back to work, little gift giver. (grabs Squirt) Thanks to you, I will have all of my heart's desires... like, pie! And it's so easy. I simply say "Boo!" (He looks around; nothing's happened.) I said "BOO!"
      (Squirt transforms into a huge version of himself. He growls at Amin who flees the Guild in terror; then Squirt Beast advances on Iago!)
      Iago: Squirt? Easy, boy, easy! I was only kidding about all that scaring stuff. Honest! I'm your friend, remember? FRIEND! AAAAAAAAAH!
      (the creature advances on Iago as he screams in terror... then reveals himself to be Genie in disguise)
      Genie: Gotcha!
      Iago: I hate you...
    • Then when the others return with the real Squirt in Jasmine's arms. Then the ugly merchant lady arrives demanding Squirt back but Jasmine wants to keep him. Iago states this very sly solution to let Squirt decide.
      Jasmine: Why'd you steal my pet, Iago?
      Iago: Uh... would you believe if you scare him, he grants your heart's desire?
      Mystic: (appearing as if out of nowhere) Not anymore he doesn't! He's MY pet!
      (Squirt screams; a glass filled with dentures appears in the Mystic's hands)
      Iago: (to Aladdin) See?
      Mystic: Give him to me!
      Jasmine: He doesn't wanna go with you!
      Iago: Ladies, ladies! (to the Mystic) And in your case, I use the term loosely. Shouldn't we let the Squirt decide what he wants? Come here, pal. (Squirt leaps out of Jasmine's arm and goes to him) Just think of what you want. Which reminds me, I've got something to show ya. (holds up a mirror and screams; Squirt sees his own reflection, screams, then disappears.)
      Mystic: You tricked me!
      Iago: Correct! Give the crone a prize.
      Mystic: Why, you! So help me, if I ever see you again, I'll feed you to my ficus! (leaves)
      Jasmine: Where'd he go?
      Iago: (tearfully) Squirt scared himself. Wherever he is, we know one thing. He granted his own heart's desire. So long, Squirt, I'll miss you. And that vibrating chair I never got!
      (Cut to an unknown, tropical location. Squirt reclines on a grassy knoll with others of his kind as he eats grapes with a contented smile on his face, closing the episode)
  • In "Egg-stra Protection", an injured Aladdin sneaks off to find Abis Mal since he was getting annoyed by Jasmine and Genie's overprotectiveness. The two have this exchange.
    Jasmine: Fine! If Aladdin wants to put his life in danger, let him!
    Genie: Yeah!
    (the two stand with crossed arms. *Beat*)
    Genie: ...Oh I'm worried!
    Jasmine: Let's go find him!
    Genie: I'll look this way!
    Jasmine: I'll look this way!
  • The whole "carpet elevator" scene in "Fowl Weather". Genie turns into an elevator operator and uses carpet as one to slowly get everyone up to a certain height above the rainforest. All just stand there looking bored as elevator music plays, and Genie awkwardly tries to make small talk about the Mighty Ducks.
  • Iago's reaction being turned into a human's (That of his own voice actor Gilbert Gottfried) in When Chaos Comes Calling.
  • Practically any moment in "Dune Quixote". Jasmine gets angry at Sadira for once again trying to claim Aladdin for herself.
    Jasmine: You were stealing my fiancé!
    Sadira: And your point is?
    • Jasmine was annoyed that Sadira is insisting that the only way to turn Aladdin back to normal is if she kisses him. Jasmine then demands from Genie if there are other alternatives besides letting Sadira kiss Aladdin. They were less than desirable...
      Genie: (plays a movie projector of the "cures") There are a number of ways to cure him. You can press him flat under a pyramid... or you could feed him to a dinosaur. Squish him with a steam roller! Or blow him up with dynamite! Or purée him in a blender! Or boil him in molten lead! Or dress him up in a cat suit and throw him in a kennel! Or-!
      Jasmine: Are there any cures he might actually live through?
      Genie: Oh, uh, heh heh. Just one. (makes a hand puppet and smooches Jasmine with it) Kissy kissy! But it's got to be Sadira.
      Jasmine: I give up...
    • When "Dragonslayer" Aladdin, wearing a bowl for a helmet and using the ladle (which Sadira stole earlier), looking quite silly, comes face to face with two thieves.
      Aladdin: (brandishing his ladle) Let me pass! Or so help me, I'll... I'll...
      Thief 1: You'll what? Spoon us to death?
      Thief 2: Hahahaha! Good one!
      (Aladdin hits one of the thieves in the stomach with the ladle)
      Thief 1: Oooh! He spooned me!
    • When everyone arrives at Genie's set.
      Jasmine: What kind of place is this? It all looks so... so...
      Sadira: (picks up a boulder one-handed as if she has suddenly gained super strength) Fake?
    • Iago and Sadira criticize Jasmine's lock-picking skill.
      Jasmine: (looking through Abu's lockpick set) How do I know which one to use?
      Sadira: Try the 19Z double reverse Fatima pick.
      Jasmine: (points at one) This one?
      Sadira: That's the Faisal-head! Don't they teach you anything at the palace!?
      Jasmine: Not thievery!
      Iago: Ah, deplorable how they ignore the basics...
    • The end of the episode where Sadira finally gets her wish and locks lips with Aladdin. Jasmine's annoyed expression was priceless as she had no choice but to let it happen in order to bring Aladdin back to normal again. You can almost hear her mentally repeating to herself "It's just to break the spell. It's just to break the spell. It's just to break the spell".
  • In "Shark Treatment", Aladdin is transforming into a shark and trying to get into the ocean.
    Genie: We can't let him reach the ocean! Saleen will get him!
    Iago: Well, we can't just let him sit there! He isn't that wet enough, if you know what I mean.
    Genie: We'll give him some water! (turns his hand into a hose)
    Iago: That's not gonna work. He's a fish, not a tomato!
  • In "The Lost Ones", Mirage believed she has finally gotten Aladdin into her fold, until he suddenly comes out saying he wants his own parking space or the deal is off, much to her confusion. She then realized too late that he was actually Genie shape-shifted as Aladdin. He gives her a big smooch after commenting how cute she looks, resulting in her backhanding him into the wall.
  • In "Seems Like Old Crimes: Part 2", Genie literally falls apart into jigsaw pieces. Abu and Iago scramble to piece him together quickly.
    Iago: Come on come on! PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER!!!
  • In "Vocal Hero" where Aladdin exposes Iago's scam of operating a mechanical donkey to fool the Sultan into feeding the donkey treasures. The Sultan then throws the parrot out of the palace as punishment. He attempts to gain sympathy from him to be allowed back into the palace. It doesn't work.
    Iago: Donkey can't dance without... without... (sees Aladdin, Jasmine and Sultan glaring at him) Why, this isn't the palace of King Wasatutu! Why, I... when I get a hold of the chumps who delivered me to the wrong address... Pow! Zoom! Awk! (Sultan grabs him)
    Sultan: Are you trying to make a fool of me, Iago?
    Iago: Oh, there’s a challenge. (Sultan glares at him) Did I say that out loud?
    (cut to Iago being thrown out of the palace)
    Sultan: And you stay out till you learn some respect!
    Iago: I don't need your charity! I'll just live in the gutter. And eat scraps. And stagger to an early grave.
    Sultan: I'm glad you've made arrangements!
    Iago: That worked...
  • In "Forget Me Lots" after Aladdin manages to break the spell by reminding Jasmine of their love. He gets true love's kiss, with Rajah.
    Aladdin: Time for true love's kiss. (Rajah pushes Aladdin to the ground and licks him).
  • In "Sandswitch"
    Genie: Al, I can't believe you're finally tying the knot. I haven't been this stunned since I found the mutant spacegoats in my underwear drayer.
    Aladdin: Yeah, it seems kind of strange doesn't it? You know what else is strange?
    Genie: Sure! This is! (pulls out some green alien-like creature with a worm in its eye socket) Piggy, piggy piggy!
    Aladdin: Well, yeah.
  • In "The Hunted": Jasmine puts some new curtains in Aladdin's hovel, saying they have no holes. Proceed for Iago to come darting through them, ripping a huge hole in them.
  • In “Shadow of a Doubt”, after Genie discovers what makes the obelisk that Mirage created outside of Agrabah so dangerous (it’s shadow causes anything in its path to basically be erased), he comes back to the palace and this happens:
    Genie: (to the Sultan, calmly) Everything is going to be fine. (now to Aladdin, slightly panicked) Al, can I have a word with you?! (pulls him aside)
  • In “I Never Mechanism I Didn’t Like”, Mechanikles creates a robot named Gregarius, who infiltrates and hypnotizes everyone in the palace (except Genie and Carpet), which makes it all the easier for him to invade and take over Agrabah with no resistance. It finally reaches a point where Genie has had enough of this insanity and tries to talk sense into Aladdin.
    Aladdin: Genie! What’s the big idea?
    Genie: Al, there comes a time where a genie has to stand up and say what’s right. With that in mind, you’ll understand when I say (grabs Aladdin by the shoulders and gets right in his face) ARE YOU NUTS?!
  • “The Game” is loaded with them.
    • The opening of the episode. Genie is working on something and being extremely secretive about it, even when Aladdin and the others check on him. When he continues his work, we get this as he basically goes full Mad Scientist;
      Genie: It’s always the same. We play a game, Carpet wins. WELL, NOT THIS TIME! (laughs manically) …Uh oh. (Peeks out the door) Anybody have a bobby pin? Paper clip? Never mind, I’ll improvise. (Goes back in, shutting the door)
      Jasmine: Don’t you think he’s going a little overboard?
      Aladdin: “Going”? He’s there.
      • Then there’s The Reveal of what he was working on. A magically improved croquet mallet. And despite this, Carpet still wins.
    • When Ding and Oopo first show up, Genie pretty much guilts the rest of the gang into joining in. After they agree?
      Genie: Thanks, guys! (dressed as an airline pilot) I’ve made every effort to make your guilt trip a pleasant one.
    • Just the interactions between the gang and Ding & Oopo, the two game-obsessed wizard siblings.
    • After he and Abu are saved from a volcano at the last minute, Iago has this to say.

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