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Fanfic / The End Is Near

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The End is Near (available at and Livejournal) is a Lighter and Softer Alternate Universe Death Note fan fiction by Tierfal.

Mello only wants his Cocoa Puffs, but Near just has to spoil his quest for sugar-laden cereal by disappearing, leaving behind nothing but puzzle pieces. Since Near would never, ever leave toys lying around, Mello deduces that something's amiss. He grabs Matt, and the two of them head off to Japan to enlist the help of the Great Detective L— and, by extension, the pretty-boy L's handcuffed to— in recovering the white-haired wonder.


That's where the fun begins.

Chock-full of puns, UST, crossdressing, Double Entendre, and other things of that nature, it's a well-done AU that forgets neither that canon does, in fact, exist, nor that it itself is supposed to be really, really funny.

The End is Near provides examples of:

  • Brand Names Are Better: Mello concedes that Light might not be so bad— after all, the boy did buy him brand-name chocolate chips.
  • Chekhov's Gun: The white chocolate bar contains the key to the Kinky Chain.
  • Everyone Can See It: There's a betting pool among the Wammy kids on how long it will take Matt and Mello to hook up.
  • Gotta Catch 'Em All:
    Mello: It's like Near's version of a breadcrumb trail, right? So we follow the pieces and find him.
    Light: Are you suggesting that we should comb the entirety of Great Britain for a couple of puzzle pieces?
  • Lampshaded Double Entendre:
    Light: Higuchi's still raving. Apparently he just says the same thing over and over-'Everyone who touched it should be dead.'
    L: Touched what?
    Mello: Bow chicka bow wow.
  • Not What It Looks Like
    The eyes of the young woman with the room service cart fixated immediately on the glinting silver chain between the shirtless Light and his rumpled companion.
    Ryuzaki paused tactfully. "Whatever it looks like," he told her, "rest assured that that is not what it is."
    Somehow, she didn't look convinced.
  • Running Gag:
    • Light's imaginary advice column.
    • Light overhearing Un-Entendre conversations between Mello and Matt that are invariably not what they look like... except for the one time he doesn't assume that he'll regret seeing what's going on behind that door.
    • His lack of creativity is disheartening.
  • Tastes Like Diabetes: Several in-universe examples. Matt wonders if you can get cavities from cuteness.
  • Yaoi Fangirl:
    "Man, if all you had to do to get the royal treatment around here was to make out with another guy, Matt was just going to—


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