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    Kilian 

The star of the channel. He "reviews" and "recaps" a number of different video games, in the same way that The Onion "reports" the news. Naturally, most of his reviews are filled with deliberate factual misinformation and are more comedy routine than proper review.


  • The Ageless: Kilian claims to be this after beating Death in a game of karaoke. It's his explanation as to is why he makes so many historical references; he doesn't keep track of what's relevant.
  • Animal Motifs: Pictures of red pandas are how Kilian usually portrays himself, which gets lampshaded several times.
  • Been There, Shaped History: Spoofed in this video . According to Kilian, he causes the invention of the internet, the collapse of the Soviet Union and the eventual bankruptcy of Rare Entertainment.
  • Cloudcuckoolander: He fits the bill. He has an irrational hatred of manatees, he associates Christmas with DYSTOPIAN MEGACITIES, and (most visibly) he's prone to making wildly inaccurate readings of the games' lore.
  • Mood Whiplash: Anytime that Kilian's actual opinion on something comes up or he seriously answers a viewer question, you can be sure that an off-the-wall joke is sure to follow.

     Kilian's player characters 

These are the player characters in Kilian's games.


In General

Friskies (Dragon Age: Origins)

  • Casanova Wannabe: Friskies is very bad at flirting. He attempts to flirt with Morrigan using a pun, only for it to backfire because his pun didn't make much sense.
  • Dirty Coward: Rather than sacrifice himself to kill the Archdemon, he pleads Alistar to do it for him.
  • Fate Worse than Death: Listening to his rapping is considered this In-Universe. Alistair would rather die then hear it, and Loghain gives up right after hearing it.
  • Square Race, Round Class: Despite being a Fighter he puts all his stats into points into leveling up his Cunning, a bit like a Rogue would.
  • Who Names Their Kid "Dude"?: He is named after the cat food brand. Kilian points out he has no idea why.

The Inquisitor (Dragon Age: Inquisition)

  • Boring, but Practical: Left the winter castle because he didn't want to pay the heating bills.
  • No Name Given: While Kilian describes designing his character's physical appearance, he never mentioned the name.
  • Really Gets Around: Apparently slept with all the characters, as Kilian made a "guide" for players curious as to who they should date. Said guide is just Kilian describing which body parts the possible love interests show naked when romanced.
  • Wizards and Witches: This Inquisitor is a Human Mage.

Shay Cormac (Assassin's Creed: Rogue)

  • Sink The Life Boats: Kilian states that since the enemy ships are British, and since Shay is Irish, that he's going to kill them all.
    Kilian: "There will be no survivors!"

Galahad (The Order: 1886)

  • Bling of War: Kilian states that he has very fancy clothes.

Godlike Merchant (Pillars of Eternity)

  • Greed: This character's dream is to get filthy rich.
  • Intrepid Merchant: He's a merchant.
  • No Name Given: While Kilian describes designing his character's physical appearance, he never mentioned the name.
  • Politically Incorrect Hero: Kilian describes his player character as being "impressively racist", while showing him wearing a KKK hood.
  • Superior Species: Kilion picked his race, Godlike, just because of the impressive name.
  • Wizards and Witches: In addition to being a merchant, he's also a wizard.

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     Other notable characters 
These are other important characters in Kilian's games.

Duke Stephen of Some Place

  • The Ace: Manages to regularly defeat invasions from Kilian's Cornwallian Empire, despite only ruling one small island.
  • Badass Gay: Openly marries Kilian's old chancellor.
  • Idiot Ball: He accepts the offer of being vassal, meaning Kilian can just imprison him now.
  • Inexplicably Awesome: How is he able to befriend his assassins over a simple conversation, make Killian's chancellor defect (And have a gay marriage with him) and live for more 400 years? Not even Killian knows.

Grongo!

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