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Season 1: The Jade Homunculus
Episode 0: Pilot
- It should come as no surprise as Yahtzee, in all his Yahtzeeness, manages to set the tone of the entire series no less than three separate times in the first episode alone.
- The first thing he says in the entire series, right after everyone else has been introduced either ecstatically or comedically:
Yahtzee: (incredibly dryly) hiiiiiiiiii.- The first thing he says in-character as Mortimer as he wakes up in the back of a cart:
Mortimer: Oh, what was I drinking last night?- And his first observation after the character introductions wrap up:
Yahtzee: Is this an all-posh adventuring party?Jack: I think it's all posh, except for Dabarella, so yeah.Amy: Dabarella doin' her own thang! - KC tries his hand at a bad Australian accent at first, to which actual Australian Amy can only respond "I will hurt you".
- Jeremy Goodsex, everyone's favorite character, makes his grand debut in this episode. And while his name and demeanour are enough to bring laughter to the entire adventuring party (even Yahtzee), it becomes apparent very quickly that nobody cottons to his extremely transparent pervertedness.Sigmar: (stares threateningly)Jeremy Goodsex: Ooh, stare all you want, charge ya 5 bucks if you wanna stare longer. Hmmhmm.Jeremy Goodsex: I don't know what else you want of me, but uh, y'know, uh, stop yelling, I guess? I didn't put you in here, I'm in here as well, this feels unnecessary.Amy: He's a perv, he'll get what he gets.Jeremy Goodsex: And I might like it. Mmmmm.
- Jack's reaction to Yahtzee landing a Nat 20 on his first investigation check.Jack: Fucking fuck!Yahtzee: I'm that good.
- Mortimer's first con of the series goes off without a hitch, barring a brief miscommunication.Mortimer: Quickly, someone's dying of a hideous disease!Driver: 'Orrible disease? Which one?Mortimer: The ugly one.Driver: No, I meant which disease?Mortimer: Oh. Uh, same applies, I suppose.
- After everyone is evacuated for cart cleansing:Guard: Ehh, diseases got in the cart again. Jeremy! I told you diseases would get in the cart, you picked up that Goodsex fella!KC: No, Jeremy was the other guard, but that was also Goodsex's first name?Guard: It's a common name! Nuff outta you...
- After unleashing an entire horde of undead on Lady January and her guards, the horde starts closing in on Jeremy Goodsex. Mortimer pauses the horde to ask Jeremy Goodsex what he could offer them in return for sparing his life:Jeremy Goodsex: Well, uh... I'm pretty good at... fuckin'.
- Upon which Mortimer unpauses the zombie horde and sics them on Jeremy Goodsex.
Episode 1: Beginnings
Episode 2: Keep, Trying
- Sigmar and Dabarella's messing around in the kitchen results in the party having to battle a haunted stove.
- Three words: Minigun. Wielding. Centaurs.
Episode 3: Artificial Monsters and Natural 1s
Episode 4: Gold and Pastries
Episode 5: Oh, Fudge!
- Yahtzee concocts an elaborate and expertly-constructed backstory to try and convince Fudge Ruckersford that the group were on a secret mission for Lady January and that his aggression was going to blow their cover. It's probably the most convincing lie Mortimer has told thus far in the campaign. Too bad he rolls a natural 1 for persuasion, much to everyone else's shock and amusement.
Episode 6: The Quiver In The River
- The party meets a siren with the voice and personality of an obnoxious Cockney hooker. She takes an instant dislike to Sigmar, and loudly propositions him in order to embarrass him. Even better, she's named Anus Quiver, of all things.Mortimer: "Her name is what...!?"Dabarella: "Anus Quiver!"Mortimer: "That's what I thought you said...!"
Episode 7: A Minimum Amount of Flair
Episode 8.1: Split the Party.... Three-Ways
- Griderbin managing to distract a flowerfolk guard by giving him "Human Pornography".
Episode 8.2: Cons, Combat and Common Names
- The party interrupts Davorty Cornhole mid-coitus with a female flowerfolk and a giant bee.Jack: Because how else would flower people have sex?
- The reveal that the spirit trapped within the Jade Homunculus is named Jeremy.
Season 2: The Platinum Heart
Episode 1: Run The Jewels
Episode 2: Welcome to V Vestage
Episode 3: Adventuring Is No Yolk
Episode 4: Worm and Cozy
Episode 5: The Battle of Piss-Off Bridge
Episode 6: A Rest at Castle Oh-Frick
Episode 7: Murder-Dome!
Episode 8: Miner Inconveniences
Episode 9: The Wormshippers
Episode 10: Dear Celia...
Episode 11: Mother of All Mushrooms
Episode 12: It's... It's... a Mushroom Blitz!
Episode 13: As the Cookie Crumbles
Episode 14: King Fuzzyhug
Episode 15: The Price of Victory
Season 3: The Liar, The Witch, and The Wartorn
Season 1 and 2 Recap
- Frost lampshading the main characters' tendency to talk their way out of problems, using guile and diplomacy rather than violence where possible. Or, as he puts it, "lying."How would our heroes defeat the gang and escape with their lives? They lied. They just lied to the gang and ran away.
...As Season 2 began, our heroes kicked off this new adventure the only way they knew how: by lying to Eggolier. (animation shows Dabarella leading Eggolier around, using a sandwich dangling from a fishing pole)
...And then they discovered the great and hidden dwarven kingdom of Gorsiaden! There, our heroes lied to dwarven royalty (the ever-straightforward Queeno), and had an epic battle with a giant robot. - "The family reunion between Celia and Grinderbin was cut short, due to Mortimer exploding most of Celia, and what was left of her was pretty upset."
- The musical number at the end of the recap video (a parody of "Cecelia" by Simon & Garfunkel), with Mortimer on lead vocals. Fans were quick to point out that getting Yahtzee to agree to this must have been very difficult... or very, very easy.Mortimer: Headed down in the dusty gloom
To meet Celia, ancient crazy mushroom
Grinderbin: (sotto voce) Hey, that's my mom!
Mortimer: Had a cave where her cult could grow
But it all had to go, so we rigged her to blow
Celia, you're Grinderbin's mum
But you were no chum to the surface
Oh Celia, thought you had it made
Until my grenade spelled your doom
You went boom
Episode 1: Deal or No Deal
- We start off with Dabarella and Grinderbin reuniting with Mortimer and Sigmar after their side-quest, with Mortimer wanting to know where on Angond Arii they'd gone off too. After a rapid recap of the side-quest, including Dabarella's mirror encounter, the bridge fight with the Catholics, and Mul getting buried alive, it cuts back to Mortimer and Sigmar staring in a Stunned Silence.
- We also learn Sigmar was busy in this time, after getting a letter from Dabarella and Grinderbin, he and a squadron of bear-folk mercenaries went off to quote, "fuck up the Catholics."Mortimer: That's why you pissed off, that one time?Sigmar: (cheerfully) Yeah!
- Sigmar then tries to hire the bear mercenaries to the Adventure is Nigh-t club, prompting this exchange:
Sigmar: I also want the relationship to be like "This guy is cool, so yes, I'm down with working for him".Mortimer: You're so needy sometimes, Sigmar.Sigmar: I want them to think I'm cool! - Dabarella introduces the party to her Familliar, Toasty Cinnamonbuns; a gingerbread-wizard with the voice of, officially, Ed Wynn (but if you don't know who that is, think "the world's most annoying clown"). Mortimer immediately proposes they eat him for lunch!
- When Yahtzee rolls a 30 for his Deception check against High Chancellory Bendory, Jack gives beautiful, half-shocked, half-laughing "Fuck you!".Yahtzee: Deception check, 30, bitch!
Episode 2: An Unexpected Dump
- After the titular unexpected Info Dump, the party have to stop and let it sink in how much they've uncovered in such a short amount of time.Dabarella: Bread, this has been a unbelievable - [Amy then breaks character and speaks in her normal voice, as Dabarella looks into the camera.] - LORE DUMP.Yahtzee: [Also breaking character] Especially considering it wasn't planned.(Mortimer, Grinderbin and Sigmar also look into the camera.)Bread: Honestly! I really thought this would be doled out throughout the season, and that you wouldn't figure this out until later...(Jack's head is suddenly superimposed over Bread's, as the fourth wall finally collapses.)Jack: ...Says the DM.
Episode 3: Was Born A Shamblin'
- After helping the platoon of knights defeat the Shambling Mound, the party decide to introduce themselves to the knights with fake names. While Mortimer and Dabarella do alright with "Sigurd Lamulana" and "Abby Ella," and the knights assume that Grinderbin's "Bud" is a normal Mushroom Man name, Sigmar almost completely bungles his attempt.KC: Sigmar's brain was like: "I don't... have a name...?" [Turns away with a look of Oh Crap! on his face]Knight: Well, that's quite unusual.Yahtzee: Mortimer just goes: *facepalm*
- The party sets up camp for the night, and Sigmar takes first watch, followed by Mortimer. After six uneventful hours...Jack: Give me a perception check.
Yahtzee: Oh, bollocks. (rolls) Nat 1.- As a result, Mortimer is too engrossed in his plans to launder the platinum from Season 2, and buy nice things with it, to notice two assassins coming up on the camp.
- Thanks to one botched roll for the assassins, and Moped throwing his prosthetic foot, and Albert (the shovel) at them, the fight doesn't last long. The crew interrogate the survivor, and learn that he has traveled from the town of Cameltoe, where he was hired to kill them.
Amy: Nooo!
Episode 4: The Forest for the Tree
- Due to an error with the map, the gang come across a graveyard full of massive graves, which Jack insists are "human-sized". Yahtzee, KC and Jesse waste no time going full gadfly.Jack: These are not giant at all...Jesse: (snickering) We're so tiny!Sigmar: Hey guys, look at these human sized graves!(Mortimer and Grinderbin give sarcastic "Yeah"s and "Wow"s, while Jack cracks up.)Grinderbin: You know, the thing that gets me about them is that this is an illusion we're aware of, yet these graves seem so normal!Mortimer: I know, I'm so impressed by this grave, (as he speaks, Mortimer's character icon moves alongside the massive grave) I think I'm going to walk past it as slowly as possible...
- Sigmar's first meeting with Oob goes about as you'd expect...Sigmar: So, here's my next question, do you wanna eat pain?Oob: What is pain?(Sigmar attacks it.)
- Mortimer, who was watching from the top of a wall, simply sighs and shouts down to his teammates: "You better get up here, Bumblefuck's at it again."
- After meeting Oob, the party learns they're going to have to travel through a grave to get into Destiny's KeepMortimer: Well, I think someone's going to have to take a risk. Dabarella?
- Ultimately, it's Sigmar who takes the initiative, and stands on the grave to be pulled down. He even copies Oob with a cheerful "Bye~!"
Mortimer: You know, there's occasionally things to admire about Sigmar, I find.- Just when Sigmar's up to his neck in the dirt, Dabarella cries out "Not again!" and then grabs onto his head to go down with him, so she ends getting pulled into ground face-first.
- Grinderbin follows suit, holding onto Dabarella's ankle, before extending a hand out to Mortimer. Mortimer instead climbs onto Grinderbin's large mushroom head and sits on it like a bar stool.
Jesse: So I hold my hand out, but you just sit on my head?Yahtzee: Yeah.Grinderbin: Bastard.- As pointed out in the comments, there's some irony to be found in the fact that the gang never even think of using the actual shovel in their party to try and dig through the grave.
Episode 5: Paint The Town... Dead
Episode 6: A Perfectly Reasonable Plan
- While coming up with plans to convince Latavia to un-shovel Albert, KC comes up with the... unique idea to create a memory of Betty and Shovel!Albert attempting and failing to conceive a child. This is accompanied by a visual of a teary-eyed Betty and Shovel!Albert with a big censor over them, while everyone else stares in wide-eyed shock. Moped even covers Oob's eyes.
- As one would expect, Betty is not amused by the plan. And Sigmar's attempts to diffuse the situation don't exactly help.
Betty: (utterly offended) Are you...mad?Sigmar: I-it's a ruse! You don't have to act - Look, I'll go in the other room!(everyone stares at Sigmar, as the party cracks up)Amy: WHAT?!Betty: If you think the problem is people watching, then maybe you don't understand what you're asking me to do! Yes, I know this is Albert. He is the love of my life. But I will NOT try to fuck a shovel! - Jesse and Yahtzee then comes up with another plan, this one involving implanting memories into a creature, then letting Oob eat the memories and letting Latavia eat the memories from Oob. To do this, Jesse does an offhand dice roll and gets a 27 Arcana check, which makes Jack gasp with laughter. The subtitles even say "Jack is DYINGGGG".
- Yahtzee then lays out his first draft of the plan...
Yahtzee: Okay, we animate the shambling mound, and just as it comes to life...(stifles a laugh)...we put like a little puppet theater minor illusion right in front of its face...(Jesse walks off, laughing)Yahtzee: ...Depicting all this wonderful stuff we've been talking about. Just a little TV screen. And then the moment we're done, we go "NOW!" and slam a bag over it's head. Then we feed it to Oob, and then we feed Oob to Latavia.Jesse: My 27 Arcana check says this is a great idea! - During the preparation for the memory puppet show for Toasty, Mortimer giving Bardic Inspiration to Dabarella through words of encouragement would be heart-warming... if not for the fact that Mortimer casts his magic through lies, which he freely admits to the audience:Mortimer: Oh, I can bullshit with the best of them, can't I?
Episode 7: The War-Torn
- After being de-shovelled, Albert is not keeping it together, and the gang try and de-escalate the situation.
- Both of Mortimer's attempts fail miserably. First, his Persuasion attempt to calm Albert nets him a Nat 1 (again), and when he tries casting Suggestion, Albert rolls a Nat 20 and no-sells it.
Yahtzee: (Facepalming) This fucking episode...Jesse: You can't contain a man who's been a shovel for 20 years!- Ironically, Grinderbin has much better luck calming down Latavia the eldritch horror, which as Jack points out, is becoming a habit of his. Some people in the comments even suggested Grinderbin could multiclass as an Oath of Redemption Paladin.
Jack: Have we not learned our lesson trying to talk down super evil big bad guys?Jesse: I will never learn my lesson of not talking people down!- Ultimately, it's Dabarella who's able to calm Albert down, in the most Dabarella way possible.
Dabarella: Albert...you're not you when you're hungry.(Cue mass corpsing from the whole party)Captions: Laughs in a MF'n Snickers ad. - Outside of the keep, our heroes get the chance to ask Latavia about what he foresaw that got him banished. As he's describing his visions, Sigmar decides to interrupt, leading to a perfect example of the show's Bathos...Latavia: I tried to warn B...Grinderbin: What was the warning?Latavia: Creatures, but not creatures. Men, but not men. They were, aberrations, but...Sigmar: (As the background ambience cuts out) Not aberrations?(Beat as Sigmar smiles, while everyone stops to look at him, Dabarella glaring.)Mortimer: Shut up, Sigmar.(Once again, the whole party cracks up.)Jesse: That was somehow both in and out of character.Jack: That's the show, balancing dramatic moments with comedy. So, I'll allow it.
Episode 8: A Man, A Plan, A Flashback
Episode 9: Break A Few Eggs
- As Sigmar and Grinderbin talk to Eggilier in the castle courtyard about Queen Beyonce's plans, Eggilier's calm composure slowly but surely breaks, and it is a sight to behold.Grinderbin: You're here for plans. What was your plans?Eggilier: You saw my plan.Grinderbin: That was it?Eggiler: Oh, I'm sorry, that was it? That was it?! You mean returning a precious item under the guise of someone else, who I know didn't steal it, so I could make an alliance with the most powerful wizard in the land?! Oh, 'that's it'! FUCK YOU!
- As the party cracks up at Eggiler cracking, Sigmar simply responds with "There's the Eggilier I grew up with!".
- Eggilier's slippage continues after this. It's understandable, since Sigmar and Grinderbin are in their element, and she is very much... not.
Grinderbin: Latavia['s a] wild dude. Who knows what's gonna happen with that.
Eggilier: And what do we mean by 'wild dude'?
Grinderbin: If they see a big, red, oozy thing coming towards the castle— (Jack mimes Eggilier rapidly losing her remaining marbles) —with a person in it—
Sigmar: Hella jelly, mad skulls...
Grinderbin: Hella jelly. Probably talking about Florida—
Eggilier: AAAAAAAGGHHH!
Episode 10: The Witch
- As the castle's alarms go off and a fight looks imminent, Eggilier produces a sword from her Victoria's Secret Compartment (where she'd been hiding a Bag of Holding).(Beat)
Mortimer: Noice. - Eggilier and Mortimer argue over whether the party should have thought ahead and brought weapons like she did. Meanwhile, Sigmar takes issue with the lack of defensive magical items in the armory.Sigmar: So your castle defenses have zero magic users, is what you're saying.
Guard: We have one, incredibly powerful magic user—her name is Queen Beyonce! - Grinderbin runs into Bonesy, who is reuniting with Queen Beyoncé. Grinderbin tries talking with him, but Bonesy can only communicate through gestures and clicking his bones together. Grinderbin's first thought is to play "Charades." Jack is incredulous.
- When Mortimer shows up, he decides to ask Eggilier, in front of Queen Beyoncé, how much they need to worry about the Jade Homunculus. And as she's struggling, Mortimer just puts on his sunglasses and watches the fireworks.Eggilier: Oh... it is a power source.... I didn't do too much to it because I only caught the thief who stole it... MORTIMER.
- Kalandra Ticklepuss (who looks to be about 60-ish) makes her debut by kicking down the front gate of Castle Sasha and shouting "WHAT'S UP, FUCKERS! WHERE'S MY SISTER!? AHAHAHAHAAA!!!" at the top of her lungs. Upon being (understandably) shot at, she throws a shrunken head at Sigmar and a huge axe at a random guard. She then proceeds to flip the double-bird to the whole room while making "pew pew pew!" sounds.
- Prince Chessurick throws a tantrum because Queen Beyoncé's "lived for so long and I will never be king and IhateyouIhateyouIhateyou!," complete with petulant foot stomping. Amy immediately cottons onto the fact that Jack intends Prince Chessurick as an Expy of King Charles III.
- Prince Chessurick is killed mid-Evil Gloating while forcing Mortimer disguised as Queen Beyoncé to abdicate.Chessurick: I feel... I feel so powerful! I can feel it- [Falls down dead as a stone].
Episode 11: The Liar
- Kalandra Ticklepuss continues to be an amusingly belligerent Cool Old Lady:
- Grinderbin asks for her help in stopping Latavia. Her response is "Well, you can goOO FUCK YO'SELF! WAAAAAAAAH!" while rapid-fire Flipping the Bird. Except that her hands are tied so she can only flip the bird at the ground, depicted as her wiggling around a little.
- Dabarella asks for clarification on weather or not Latavia is alive or undead. Kalandra's response:
Kalandra: "It's a complicated question..."Dabarella: "What happened?"KC: [Bout of Corpsing]Kalandra: "Weeeeell... Lemmie tell ya a story..."Sigmar: "I am so ready for this...!"Dabarella: "Is it a quick story?"Kalandra: "It's a real quick story! Go fuck yaself!"[everyone loses it]Mortimer: "Saw that coming..."Dabarella: "That's not very nice!"- Mortimer casts Suggestion on her to try and make her tell the party how to stop Latavia. She pretends to play along for all of five seconds before cussing Mortimer out.
"His weakness, yes. It's about fucking yourself! That's yer 'weakness,' coz guess what!? I'm immune to being Charmed, motherfucker! Aarg, you can't see m' middle fingers!" - Eggolier noticing Sigmar's body-horriffic arm-bow."Sigmar, I don't WHAT THE FUCK!?!?"
- She chews him out for getting himself cursed, then lampshades that she can't take any satisfaction from it because they all have too much other crap to worry about.
- Albert, Moped and Betty Ticklepuss arrive by magical means, and are taken slightly aback by everything that's happened.Albert: Took care of her already! All right! My man! (makes finger-guns at Sigmar)
- KC gets sidetracked for a moment by the fact that Beyonce has unexpectedly reunited with both of her bandmates—er, sisters.
Betty: About my father—I just, I don't think you're ready for that jelly. - Prince Chessurick, upon arriving in Hell, immediately demanded to speak with the manager, little knowing that the lady in the golden skull mask who keeps sending him to the back of the line is actually the Goddess of Death herself, doing it for a giggle because she likes how he squeals when she does.
Adventure Is Nigh: Side Quest
Side Quest Episode 1: The Cat Café
Side Quest Episode 2: Foreshadowing
Side Quest Episode 3: Cat Cat Bang Bang
The Cabin That Calls Episode 1: The Cabin That Calls
The Cabin That Calls Episode 2: Pay Rent or Repent
The Cabin That Calls Episode 3: A Deer Caught in Twilight
The Cabin That Calls Episode 4: The Trouble With Wizards
