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- The Everest College ads."You sittin' on the couch watching TV as your life is passing you by. You keep procrastinating over and over, well maybe I'll go to school next year or maybe next semester. No, do it right now! You spend all day on the phone anyway, why don't you make the call that's going to help you in your future? All you have to do is pick up the phone and make the call. Why are you making it so complicated? It's easy!"
- Could also be a Dare to Be Badass.
- This Public Service Announcement features Samuel L. Jackson giving one to anyone who hides behind excuses for resorting to gun violence.Let me tell you who to blame. Blame the boy lying at your feet, his body oozing life through the hole in his stomach where the bullet tore him apart. Blame him for challenging you, for not looking away and for not backing down when you pulled out the gun. Blame your mother for bringing you into this world when she was but a kid herself, and dragging you up, not bringing you up. Blame society for not giving you hope. Blame your father for not being there, the man who looked after himself, instead of looking after you. Blame the gun in your hand for making you a target, for making you more likely to be picked on. Blame the dead boy, blame your mother, blame society, blame your father, blame the gun, blame anyone but yourself for not being strong enough to put down the gun, to break the cycle!
- Ultimately averted in FoxTrot. Roger Fox is tasked with trying to secure a raise for his boss, Pembrook, at a time when the company is having to lay people off. He's prepared to tell him that it's unacceptably selfish of him to take a raise at a time when the company is in peril and good, hard-working people are losing their job, but a panel reveals that he's merely rehearsing the speech, and at the end of the arc, he doesn't manage to go through with it.
- In the first season of Survivor, fourth-place finisher Susan Hawk opts to use her time allotted to ask the final two (Richard Hatch and Kelly Wigglesworth) a question to instead deliver one to both but especially Kelly, who Sue had intended to take to the final two of the competition and instead both defected from their overall alliance but cast the deciding vote to get rid of Sue instead of Richard."Kelly, the Rafting Persona Queen... you did get stomped on on national TV by a city boy who never swam, let alone been in the woods or jungle or rowed a boat in his life. You sucked on that game. Anyways, I was your friend at the beginning of this, really thinking that you were a true friend. I was willing to be sitting there and putting you next to me... at that time you were sweeter than me, I'm not a very... openly nice person. I'm just frank, forward, and tell you the way it is. To have you sit there next to me, and have me lose 900,000 dollars just to stomp on somebody like [Richard]. But as the game went along and the two tribes merged you lied to me, which showed me the true person that you are; you're very two-faced and manipulative to get where you're at anywhere in life, that's why you fail all the time. ... but Kelly, go back to a couple of times Jeff [Probst, the host] said 'what goes around comes around?' It's here. You will not get my vote, my vote will go to Richard, and I hope that is the one vote that makes you lose the money. If not, so be it, I'll shake your hand and go on from here. But if I were ever [to] pass you along in life again and you were laying there, dying of thirst, I would not give you a drink of water. I would let the vultures take you and do whatever they want with ya. With no ill-regrets. I plead to the jury tonight to think a little about the island that we have been on. This island is pretty much full of only two things; snakes and rats. And in the end of Mother Nature, we have Richard the snake, who knowingly went after prey, and Kelly who turned into the rat that ran around as the rats do on this island, trying to run from the snake. I feel it that we owe it to the island spirits that we have learned to come to know to let it be in the end as Mother Nature intended it to be, for the snake to eat the rat."
"Mick: Day One, they put a leadership necklace around your neck. I go 39 days, struggling to find a reason that you deserve that title. You did nothing: you did nothing with your team, you did nothing to encourage them. Nobody on that team had any guts; you're responsible for that. Russell: this hurts me. We had nothing in common... You played an unethical game, admittedly played an unethical game. The crazy thing about it is you're sittin' there; I'm standing here. Did you get to the right place by behaving the wrong way? I've never been in a situation [in] my entire life where that was the case, but you sit there proud of it! Natalie: people will call you weak, people will say that you are undeserving... but you know what? Why are those characteristics any less 'admirable' [than] lying, cheating, and stealing? Why does [Russell] get a free pass but your 'wrong' way of playing is admonished? If there's one thing that I learned in this game, it's that (to the jury) perception is not reality! Reality is reality, and (to Natalie) you are sitting there, and that makes you just as dangerous as any one of those guys there. You would say that you are least deserving of the title of Sole Survivor, but maybe (just maybe) in an environment filled with arrogance [and] delusional entitlement, maybe the person who thinks she's least deserving is probably the most."
- Eighteen seasons later, twelfth-place finisher Erik Cardona uses his time allotted to deliver one that casts an Alternative Character Interpretation on the Final Three of Samoa: Mick, Russell, and Natalie:
"It's just a game. That's something we've probably all said a thousand times while we were out here. And I'm sure that for both of you, it was an excuse that helped wash away the guilt as you played the game the way that you played it. You know what? That phrase, 'it's just a game'? It's a big lie. It's not just a game. For all of us out here, for all of you, it's life. And the line between game and life is not cut and dried. Life blurs into the game constantly. This game exposes who we are as people to the core. It's like truth serum. And I think the way you play this game is representative of the kind of person you are. The hardest lesson I learned out here was about friendship and betrayal. And I think the true measure of a man is what kind of friend he is. What kind of a friend are you, Rob? What kind of a friend were you to me? You asked me to do you a favor. Bro to bro. Friend to friend. And I did the only thing I could do, and that was to answer the call of a friend in need. You repaid that by putting a knife in my back. As far as this game's concerned, I lost, and you both beat me. No sour grapes, no bitterness. With all sincerity, I congratulate both of you for making it to the final two. But as I see it, as good as your game was, you sold out your values, you sold out your character, and you sold out your friends for a stack of greenbacks. I hope it was worth it, because that money will never be enough to buy it all back."
- In All-Stars, ninth-placer Lex van den Berghe delivers one to finalists Rob and Amber that's littered with Moral Myopia, since he's berating them for making very similar moves that he made prior to being voted out:
- The Final Tribal Council in Heroes vs. Villains was one delivered to Russell Hantz, with all the jurors telling him that he had lied to and bullied them way, way too much for them to ever want to "reward" him for his sociopathic gameplay.
- On the UK version of The Apprentice:
"I could not have put more effort into yesterday. I fragged myself to the bone yesterday to try and make this thing work. Your reasons for bringing me in here just do not stack up. One, on a personal level, and two, on a business level. Sir Alan said he does not know about my personal stuff. He knows about it because you talked about it, because Kristina talked about it. Fine, been that, but if you want to go personal, I'll go personal. I very much strongly advise you not to take down the personal route. At a business level, you have one speed setting, and that speed setting is slow, slow, slow! Someone put the wrong speed dial in when they created you, sweetie, which is why when the phone rings, I always drop. Because I know that phone call will take forever to hear something either I know, or I can get done quicker myself. So you know what? You're just barking up the wrong tree!"
- Katie Hopkins delivered a particularly memorable one to Adam Hosker in Series 3.
"You are representing businesswomen today, one of which I am. And I have to say, it is outrageous the way you're behaving. 75% of my management team are women, and I've never come across anything like this. And I think you have to remember who you're representing in this process. Young women out there who want to have an opportunity to do this - you should be an example to them."
- Karren Brady delivered one to the losing team in the sixth series. The team were arguing amongst themselves in the boardroom, it grew heated, and after Lord Sugar called them 'a bunch of bloody amateurs', Karren stepped in.
"Well, first of all, everything was wrong. The volume was wrong, the margins were wrong, the techniques of selling were wrong. I struggle to find anything that you did right, really. But it wasn't just you — I think it was everybody in the team who just failed to perform."
- This is Claude Littner's interview technique. His first comment when he was a member of the panel on "You're Fired" carried on the trend:
Stand Up Comedy
- According to Bill Bailey, membership renewal requests from the Automobile Association become this on the third letter:Dear Mr Bailey; it appears you have not renewed your AA membership. Picture the scene: a lonely stretch of the B3174, a car that refuses to start. That car is yours. That terrified driver is YOU. Why would you leave the AA, one of the most glitteringly magnificent organisations the world has ever seen? And now, when you are at your most vulnerable: Your cholesterol levels are worryingly high; your friends talk about you behind your back, they pity you! Your arrogance has placed your family in mortal danger! You have stepped from the light into the abyss! Without us, you're nothing but a pitiful roadside MAGGOT, crawling along the edge of a straight razor! Crawling! Crawling! Crawling... Please let me know if you reconsider.
- Bobcat Goldthwait's bit about Star Wars fans.
- "Magic of Faerun", a Forgotten Realms sourcebook, has one given by Khelben Blackstaff to an intruder he's about to kill as its intro.
- Warhammer 40,000:
Angron: What would you know of struggle, Perfect Son? When have you fought against the mutilation of your mind? when have you had to do anything more than tally compliances and polish your armour?" [...] The people of your world named you Great One. The people of mine called me Slave. Which one of us landed on a paradise of civilisation to be raised by a foster father, Roboute? Which one of us was given armies to lead after training in the halls of the Macraggian high-riders? Which one of us inherited a strong, cultured kingdom? And which one of us had to rise up against a kingdom with nothing but a horde of starving slaves? Which one of us was a child enslaved on a world of monsters, with his brain cut up by carving knives? Listen to your blue-clad wretches yelling of courage and honour, courage and honour, courage and honour. Do you even know the meaning of those words? Courage is fighting the kingdom which enslaves you, no matter that their armies outnumber yours by ten-thousand to one. You know nothing of courage. Honour is resisting a tyrant when all others suckle and grow fat on the hypocrisy he feeds them. You know nothing of honour.
- In the short-story The Last Church, part of the Horus Heresy range, Uriah Olathaire, the last Christian priest on Earth delivers an epic one to Revelation AKA The Emperor Himself, calling him out on his hypocrisy and brutality, and pointing out just how his plan for a unified Empire of Mankind will fail, before choosing to burn with his beloved church rather than take part in His vision.
- The Horus Heresy consisted almost exclusively of these, at least in the parts where they wouldn't have been drowned out by gunfire. Battle for the Abyss, for example, has an Ultramarine call out a Word Bearer for his Legion being too weak to stand alone, hence their need to seek out gods, while Betrayer has Angron rip into Guilliman with one of the best examples of one of these speeches ever given in the franchise:
"Why do I still live? What more do you want from me? I gave everything I had to you, to them. Look what they've done to our dream. This bloated, rotting carcass of an empire is not driven by reason and hope, but by fear, hate and ignorance. Better that we all burned in the fires of Horus' ambition than lived to see this."
- To which Guilliman retorts "Youre still a slave, Angron. Enslaved by your past, blind to the future. Too hateful to learn. Too spiteful to prosper." Angron despised the Butcher's Nails but was happy to implant them into his own legion, and he ignored how much the other Primarchs struggled: Sanguinius civilised a world of mutant cannibals, Mortarion was raised on a poisonous world where everyone feared him but he still helped people, and Konrad Curze in all his horror and brutality brought a semblence of order to the most nightmarish Wretched Hive in the galaxy. All Angron ever did was blame others for the unfairness in his life.
- In between the inter-Legion shouting, you got some of these between members of the one Legion - for example, Solomon Demeter casually informing the future Lucius the Eternal that while he may once have had the makings of a great officer, now he's just a lickspittle and sycophant with a swollen ego.
- Sometimes you even got them between Primarchs on the same side of the war, best exemplified a) when Perturabo smashes Fulgrim's face into a model Titan and explains that the Emperor's Children are officially a complete disgrace to the Legiones Astartes, and b) when Guilliman breaks Lion El'Jonson in half with two sentences.
- Guilliman seems to be good at making these. He was not happy one bit with the state of the Imperium when he was revived at the end of "Gathering Storm":
- In Shadowrun, the Great Dragon Hestaby gives one of these to Aztechnology, the May Inca Tec Mega-Corp that runs Aztlan and secretly runs itself on Blood Magic, in the intro story to SOTA 2073. For added fun, she did so publicly. At the United Nations Assembly.
- In Ravenloft, the archmage Meredoth gave a rather vicious one to an agent of the Fraternity of Shadows, a group of illusionists and mind mages who believe themselves able to usurp the Dark Powers. Meredoth points out not only their incredible hubris in thinking such a thing is possible (the only entity in the multiverse we know of that has been able to overcome the Dark Powers was Vecna, a literal god!), but also their use of what he considers a minor and mostly useless type of magic compared to toher schools. Real mages, according to him, shouldn't hide in shadows. They should use their powers to take whatever they want.