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Comics: Season 8

• After Xander is forced to ride Centaurette Dawn (causing her to get soaking wet), this exchange happens:
  Xander: How're you feeling?
  Centaurette-Dawn: Like I was ridden hard and put away wet.
  Xander: AGH! Dawn, that's dis — oh. No. It's just true.
• How about the title of an issue of the Twilight arc. What issue? "Them F#©%ing (Plus the True History of the Universe)", of course!
• Andrew and his video camera, including:
  "I investigate farther. Further. I investigate more."
• We see Angel putting on the Twilight mask for the first time, with the narration stating that he has to do it so that Buffy won't know that it's him. Cut to Spike, seated at a computer and watching the footage of Twilight's first public appearance as it's being made.
  Spike: So that's Angel, then.
• The E-Comic "Harmony Comes to the Nation." It's a S8 tie-in. The plot? It's a two-page comic showing an interview with Harmony after her show. The interviewer? Stephen Colbert! Oh, and he, in his trademark style, points out her hypocrisy and stupidity.
• In No Future For You, Faith is sent undercover to bag Genevieve Savidge, a British Slayer who has gone evil, a story she should be familiar with. Even after being trained, she still has a bit of trouble with local slang, which leads to this exchange:
  Genevieve: Mind if I bum a fag?
  Faith: What do I care? You can bum whoever you... oh.
• Earlier in The Long Way Home, Buffy is angsting over the things she misses, sex among them. Later, she is trapped in a dream state with Ethan Rayne who claims to know all her secrets, before revealing Buffy's fantasy of her in a Naughty Nurse Outfit chained to a naked Angel and a naked Spike.
  "No. That's nothing worth... it's just been a slow year."
• The Unreveal of Twilight's identity. "Sorry, itchy neck."
• Everyone piling into Buffy's bedroom and catching her and Satsu together.
  Should I sound the alarm?
  I wasn't aware that we *had* an alarm for [Buffy sleeping with a girl]. But yes. Sound it.
  • For that matter, Willow tries to gently steer Satsu away from Buffy, fearing they'll get hurt. She then grills her on what Buffy's like in bed.
  • Then there's a vampire speculating that Buffy tastes sweet. Satsu stakes him and replies, "You have no idea." She cringes upon saying it.
• Buffy hits on Xander.
  Xander: Hey, that's a big deal! I'm a potential romantic interest! I'm on the list—right after being gay. I rate almost as good as trying to change your sexual orientation. You went—through gay— to me.
• Just the very fact that the villain is named Twilight. Many lines instantly become ten times funnier.
  Spike: You wanna put these demons down and end this Twilight crap once and for all?
• Hunting for Simone, Buffy takes Andrew along with her, seeing as he was Simone's Watcher. Well, for the whole trip, she puts up with his endless discussion of the most obsessive geek topics, until he gets onto the topic of James Bond, specifically Daniel Craig. Buffy just so happens to have a huge Celeb Crush on him and is so into him in, well, that context that Andrew (who is gay) is creeped out.

Comics: Season 9 (including Angel & Faith, Spike: A Dark Place, and Willow: Wonderland)

• Menacing demon: "Buffy Summers, it is time for you to pay. ... YOUR STUDENT LOAN!"
  • "Nobody say a fucking word." Buffy glares at the reader when making this comment, which makes the scene's Lampshade Hanging ever funnier.
  • Also the fact that after being locked out of his home dimension by the recent destruction of the Seed of Wonder, this menacing demon has been reduced to working as a debt collector. And that the people who summoned him thought that Buffy's case would need a menacing demon to get her to pay up.
• "Oh my God... this is the crappiest ritual dagger I've ever seen."
• The Angel & Faith comic In Perfect Harmony. Just... all of it.
  • Angel reminisces about his love for private detectives, how he enjoyed playing one for Angel Investigations, the cliche of a stormy night when a lady requests the detective's help. Well, it is a stormy night and a lady requests his help, and when Angel sees that it's Harmony, he remembers why he quit being a detective.
  • Faith complains that she's meant to be a slut when Spike had slept with everyone except her.
  • Harmony shows a sex tape where she sires someone, despite Angel repeatedly begging her not to. And Faith reasoning they're meant to boost the popularity of celebs with no talent.
  • Angel brings Angelus levels of snark.
    "Y'know, when you started this story, I didn't think it was possible for me to care any less. But here we are."
  • When trying to narrow down the list of suspects, Faith has a suggestion.
    "Anyone who really hates you... y'know what, never mind."
  • Faith's idea to blackmail Harmony, then release the tape.
  • A vampire calls Harmony "a slag with a fat ass," sending her into a Berserker Rage.
  • When asked about the sex tape, the vampire who slagged her off turns out to be a huge fan who has all the other videos she made.
  • Angel tries to say he didn't realize how famous Harmony was, but the words get stuck in his throat.
  • When the idea is made to make a list of people who really hate Harmony, Faith calls dibs on top spot.
  • Harmony shares advice she got from Charlie Sheen. Faith offers some herself.
    "When all else fails, bust some heads."
  • Harmony gets the idea of paying Angel by making him look good, even proposing a sex tape for him, before remembering he'd probably lose his soul. Not that it stops her from continually discussing the idea.
  • Harmony getting upset over her image in publicity campaigns.
  • Faith referencing Star Wars again.
  • Faith offers her opinion on seeing Harmony stripping at a club. Bonus points for looking envious.
    "Those are so fake."
  • Angel throws out the reward Harmony gives him, the realization that famous people are crazy much more valuable to him.
  • Harmony complaining that a magazine cover makes her look 25.
  • After Clem confesses he's in love with Harmony, she kisses him but says she can only date tens, as attractive people have that "responsibility", and she continues to treat him like dirt. Then he goes back to being her lapdog.
• Spike is amused when Buffy loses an arm, only to discover not only might she not be pregnant, but she's actually a Buffybot, which leads her to swear again.
  Spike...I'm a f&^king robot!
• Daddy Issues was really heavy, and we needed something light. We got it with Women of a Certain Age which revolved around Giles's aunts, and they're no better than Harmony.
  • They invite themselves in and when challenged said how "all residents of the country home" are allowed, as per the will. Faith abashedly admits she thought it was referring to horses.
  • Angel typically tries to apologize for killing Giles. They brush him off on account of magic but when he tries to claim it was his choice, he's told that his hair is much more cause to be sorry for.
  • Turns out one of the reasons they are there is because they had made a lot of deals with demons, and now an army of them are looking to collect. At this point, Faith asks the aunts if Giles hates them as much as she does.
  • After fighting several of them, one demon enters and says he just wants a kiss, chasing after Giles's aunts. When the next demon enters, Angel proposes a truce, not wanting to miss the funny scene. The demon readily agrees.
  • As a boy, Giles wanted to be a fighter pilot and was constantly playing with a toy plane. After he nearly tears a hole in one of his aunt's minidress, they claim they should have called the little blighter "Ripper."
  • When they're alone, Angel thinks Lavinia is trying to seduce him. As well as the whole losing his soul issue, she freaks him out. When she sees what he thinks, she laughs it off and says she would have gotten married if she wanted to shag a corpse. Meanwhile, Giles is thought to be Faith's sugar daddy, and denials of this are ignored.
  • The next comic's alternate cover proves the Fake Swami's (of Guise Will Be Guise) point: It has Faith cruising Hollywood in a convertible, Angel's old car, in the sun, having a ball. Where's Angel? Growling under his coat, sizzling. Irony.
  • When the aunts stay, one of them rummages through Faith's drawers and says she found earplugs where the Slayer keeps her vibrator. Faith maintains they're stakes, but she has alluded to using them as dildos before.
• In the first Spike issue:
  Elizabeth: "I have never seen his majesty like this before."
  Sebastian: "He has told us to sod off before, Elizabeth. Just last week, he told Scotty and me to engage in an activity so anatomically impossible that--"
  • Also from the same issue: "Tell my wife and larvae I love them."
• Buffy, after suddenly being teleported in the middle of a fight: "What the hell dimension?"
• "Good to see you dropped the Twilight act. I hear the chick who writes the gothic novels is litigous."
• From Live Through This:
  Angel: "If I avoided people who want to kill me, I'd never leave the house."
• In Death & Consequences, when Spike is called in to help, he's about to use a chalice as an ashtray to the horror of the magic expert that had been helping Angel and Faith, when Angel thinks Buffy dumped Spike. Shit's on. Faith looks like she is in pain and their fight and it takes a crazy-with-rage Slayer wielding a sword at them to get the pair to stop.
• This:
  Faith: Okay, I missed an episode. These guys are selling juice that grows back people's arms?
  Angel: Not just arms. That was the blood of a Mohra Demon. It can regenerate any organ. Any wound. Even necrotic tissue.
  Faith: You saying it could raise the dead? Ain't that kind of a leap?
  Angel: I've seen Mohra blood bring a dead body to life. Mine.
  Faith: I missed a whole damn season.
• Angel, Faith and Spike. Let's start with the covers, which is either Spike literally Chewing the Scenery and Faith amused, or Angel and Spike literally playing Betty and Veronica and Faith is not amused, nor is she when Spike jokes about the shackles Giles had.
  • Faith has to ward off a horny Spike, flatly shooting him down. Anyone else she'd be all for, but not him as she's matured past the bad boy phase.
  • As they go to fight the Enders, Faith mentions Spike is more like Angel. Spike immediately latches onto the idea of them being gay and is enraged, but his comments only make it worse. After the fight, Faith reveals needling him about Angel and Buffy was for motivation, since Spike was concerned about how much of a threat the Enders were. He thinks she only said it to piss him off and fight better; nope, meant every word.
  • Despite being the last person to give advice, Faith suggests Spike will get laid when he gets over Buffy. He enthusiastically agrees and claims he's over her, right now.
    Right. Not even I am buying that one.
  • With Faith keeping Spike at heel, he tries hitting on Giles's aunts, who also reject him on account of being too much of a Nice Guy and having a soul.
    A stake, I think. Stakes are quick. Though walking into sunlight and '''going down in flames''' seems an apt metaphor.
  • And to add to his woes, he has to watch a crazed Angel. He starts by blaming everything on Angel and using him as a life-sized puppet to mock him and because he got a soul Spike went and got one too like a wanker, then blaming Buffy for wanting a good man and when Spike became one thinking he was boring until Angel wakes up and reveals he was listening to Spike whine.
  • Spike claims his words were all a ploy to help Angel recover, just like Faith did. Because Spike did help, Angel gives him a phone number; Faith finds out whose when she threatens to make Spike eat his jacket if he uses all the hot water.
    Harmony: You're out of hot water.
  • Angel got Spike to call his ex, who took Faith's robe. When it's pointed out, Harmony promptly takes it off, but Faith no longer wants it. Angel's rather embarrassed about setting them up but it's quickly forgotten when Harmony finds the shackles and calls for Spike, who comes running out the shower as Faith screams for him to put a towel on.
  • Faith grills Angel on not bringing Daniel Craig back for her (whom Buffy had brought up wanting to do a few times), but he maintains it would be sleazy even though that was perfectly okay for Spike and Harmony. Instead, he takes her out for breakfast, hoping the sunlight will get him after having to hear Spike's antics.
• Angel, Faith and Giles's aunts are able to finally resurrect Giles. There's just one problem: his aunts were so vain they pictured him as a twelve year old boy. They stare, and they stare, then he looks in a mirror to see Harry Potter. Who stares down Faith's top when she inquires if it's really him, before she notices and looks like she's going to thump him. As Giles puts it...
  "Bugger. What have you idiots done?"
  • Giles finds Faith for a pep talk and apologizes for staring inappropriately, which she brushes off as him being a hormonal adolescent, prompting a temper tantrum that he's not before noticing her bemused smile at him acting exactly like a 12 year-old. She gives him a hug, then... well...he gets a stack of quarters.
    • Perhaps the best/worst/most embarrassingly hilarious part? Giles simply cannot reconcile the Quintessential British Gentleman he thoroughly enjoyed being with the Hormone-Addled Teenager he has become, and makes repeated rants to that effect... which come off as teenage temper tantrums.
      I'm a grown man, damn it all! I wear Saville Row clothes and drink Darjeeling tea and appreciate the nuances of Dostoyevsky in the original Russian! I am not some flighty, hormonal child who believes the world revolves around him and throws tantrums when he doesn't get his way! [notices Faith trying not to laugh at the Hypocritical Humor] Um. [Beat] That would have sounded better if my voice hadn't cracked.

Comics: Season 10 (including Angel & Faith vol. 2)

• The preview for Angel & Faith #4 suggests that Faith is screwing up. Again. As in, "Faith screws up. Must be Tuesday."
• Dracula treats Xander like a spurned lover, and gets pissy when he acts like he can control thunder and lightning only for Xander to tell Dawn he simply knows when it will strike.
  • Same comic, Dawn scoffs at the idea of willing things to happen, thinking if it was that easy she would be Black Widow. This leads to the revelation she and Xander dress up in things like Pirates of the Caribbean for sex, much to Buffy's horror.
  • Also from Buffy 10 3, Xander is having aged 12! Giles play XBOX, and trying to instruct him on the bad things to do in the game. Never mind that he lets a twelve year old Giles play Grand Theft Auto, he's trying to get him to kill hookers for money.
• Dracula steals the Vampyr book, which now has the power to define this dimension's mystical rules, to take control of magic and its effect on reality. His first entry? Make himself genuinely look young again, not just his glamor. His second? All vampires refer to him as their Lord. Spike is not happy about that one.
• Andrew tries to fix the book after Dracula accidentally turns himself into an Old One. First he tries a retcon, and the book rejects it. Then he tries claiming It Was All Just A Dream and the book rejects it.
  Xander: The book really doesn't like cliches, either.
• Issue five has Willow fly a priest to the top of a skyscraper to bless it in order to turn the giant spire into a giant stake for a vampiric Old One.
  Priest: There's normally a bit of ceremony...
  Willow: No offense, but I'm a Jewish Wiccan and we're all about to die!
  Priest: Bless this building and all who use it-
  Willow: GIANT VAMPIRE COMING RIGHT AT US!
  Priest: Weaskyourblessingthroughchristourlordamen!
• Issue #7, "I Wish", has Spike and Xander briefly enslaved by evil mermaid-types. Their dreamy chatter as they're led back to the sirens' hideout is gold:
  Xander: I think we'll be having the sex. Do you think we'll be having the sex?
  Spike: If that's what the ladies want, it's only gentlemanly to provide it. If they want me to disembowel you, I'll do that too.
  Xander: Yeah, that's the polite thing.
• In the same issue, while having a pillow fight in their underwear while under the sirens' thrall:
  Spike: You know, I'm starting to feel a wee bit objectified.
  Xander: Really? I find this empowering.
• Then the hypnosis wears off...
  Xander: Hey. Why am I so upset? Why am I practically naked? And why am I horsy riding— [Beat] We will never speak of this again.
  Spike: Bloody well right.
  Xander: How are your muscles so hard and your skin so soft?
• In issue 10, Harmony visits Xander and Spike's apartment, knocks Spike out and orders Clem to write her "ideal world" into the Reality Warper Vampyr book. Her changes include: everyone loves being fed on by vampires and won't freak out if they kill someone by accident, unicorns are totally real, everyone adores and listens to everything Harmony says, every woman on earth wants to be Harmony, every man who Harmony thinks is attractive will be in love with her... and that Buffy, Spike and Angel cut the crap and enter into a polyamorous polygamous marriage, to show that Harmony totally isn't selfish.
  • Clem declines actually writing any of that except the unicorn part.
• Issue 11 has the compulsory Take That! jab at Twilight. It's actually pretty funny.
  Spike: "But you're not sparkling!" Well, excuse me. I'll shove some pop rocks up me arse.
  • Buffy speed-dating in the same issue was also pretty funny, particularly when one of her dates turns out to be a vampire. Realizing she's a Slayer, he tries to break it off early... until he realizes she's the one Slayer with a rumoured "vampire fetish". At that point, he tries to convince her to give him a chance by claiming he's extremely self-hating.
• Giles tries to rekindle his relationship with Olivia, who's aghast that he really believed she'd be okay with being with someone in a 12-year-old's body.
  Giles: Well, you've never been one to follow convention. I'd hoped—
  Olivia: What? That I'm a pedophile?!
• Spike is less-inclined towards kitten poker these days, and manages to win the litter to spare them... and then brings them home with him. He at first claims he's planning on finding them a home the next day, but he and Xander end up keeping 3 while Buffy, Willow and Dawn keep the other 3.
  • Ghost Anya fawning over the kittens:
  "Oh, they're adorable! I don't know how anyone can compare them to rabbits! Cats have a sadistic, predatory streak you can't help but love!"
• Xander and Dawn trying to make up excuses for the noises they're hearing from Xander and Spike's apartment being anything other than rough sex. The agreed idea? Buffy and Spike are "making sandwiches".
  • Xander knows exactly what his maquettes smashing sounds like.
  • Dawn admits that she's not actually following the "making sandwiches" euphemism and Xander admits the same, "but it sounds filthy, doesn't it?"
• The morning after, Buffy complains that it's unfair that vampires don't get morning breath. Spike offers that they get blood clots between their teeth instead, if it helps. Buffy agrees that it does, as she now finds him just as gross as she finds herself.
• Spike confides in Xander about his worries about having killed the two murder victims in his dreams:
  Spike: That's why I had to tell someone. Someone I can trust. Who trusts me, y'know?
  Xander, holding a stake and crucifix: Oh, totally.
• When Spike asks Willow and Giles to keep his dreams from Buffy until they know something concrete about it, Giles accuses him of asking it purely out selfish intent. Xander points out that Buffy wouldn't exactly like the way they're treating Spike over the matter either. Giles, having already been on the receiving end of Buffy's protective girlfriend shtick, immediately folds.
  Xander: Sure. And you should be too. Ever think that Buffy might not cotton to you treating her snuggle-bat like a criminal without any proof?
  Giles: ...I suppose it's only decent to have some answers for her.
• Spike and Buffy are initially confused about what it means that the bit of a demon who starts a line of vampires resides in each vampire in the line, thinking it means each vampire is in some way the same person (instead of an amalgam of the person they were and the demon).
  Buffy: Angel... and Spike? I literally fell in love with the same guy twice?
  Spike: Wait, Dru too? I shagged myself?
• When they have to call Angel in, Spike is in a bad mood. Kid!Giles tells him to try and rise above it, and conduct himself with "grace and maturity" when making the phone call. Spike seemingly agrees as he dials...
  Spike: Hello, wanker.
  Angel: You'd think I would have blocked your number by now.
• Lavinia and Sophie are discussing how women are supposed to keep up appearances and look glamorous. Cut to Faith looking completely hung over. Later when Fred returns they again address this concerned the problem is spreading, with Faith and Fred looking like they had been up all night and in desperate need of sleep, or at least a shower and change of clothes.
  Faith: Definitely getting my own place.
  Fred: Take me with you.
• Preparing to fight the Big Bad, Dawn is in charge with handing out the arms. Never mind the Bratty Half-Pint being seen as the most mature of them and demanding they behave, Giles tells her not to be ridiculous before the group realizes that each of them have fought each other.
  Spike: Just give us the bloody weapons.
  • Andrew comes up with the idea of using radios to keep in contact, shaped like bananas for... some reason. He brings up to Angel that he's out of the closet. Angel's reply?
  You were in?
  • Later Willow mentions to Angel about how she believes immortals have trouble with change, and Angel reminds her that Spike is immortal too. Willow points out that he's already proven his capacity for change because of the whole choosing-to-get-a-soul thing, and asks Angel if he's any different than he was 90 years ago. He indignantly protests that he is, but only ends putting his foot in it:
    "I used to be this brooding, tortured mess. Racked with guilt. Half the time withdrawn from the world, the other half jumping into these crazy, grand gestures—that would inevitably blow up in my face--to try and make up for everything I'd...I'm gonna go guard the rear."
  • Spike finally comes up with a difference between him and Angel while taking to Buffy: he's British while Angel is Irish.
• Buffy, Spike, and the Magic Council teleport to Buffy, Dawn, and Willow's apartment... while Dawn has a study group over.
• Dylan, Spike's sorta-Love Interest from Into the Light shows up. Spike quickly tries to put his cards on the table by telling her he's currently dating Buffy... and Dylan laughs at him, asking if he really thought she was chasing a guy she knew for two days. She actually just wanted to catch up and see if he wanted to come to her art show.
• Ghost Anya spectating Buffy and Spike having a disagreement in the next room with her usual Anya bluntness:
  Anya: Now Buffy's trying to pretend she's not mad, but she's pouting and giving him the cold shoulder. Spike's upset because he was hoping they'd have sex, so he's trying to take back what he said, which only makes her madder because she knows it's true and he's only trying to get some.
• D'Hoffryn suddenly teleporting into Buffy's bedroom while she's in it, and Buffy protesting that she could have been doing bedroom activities.
• Dawn figures out how to use her key abilities in the hell dimension through yoga breathing techniques.
• Xander manages to gain himself a place of honour among the demons by teaching them about gabled roofing and repeating the advice he's learned from therapy to them.
  • The demons re-enacting The Princess Bride as a live performance for Xander and Dawn.
• When Buffy and Spike have a lovers' spat in front of a sadism demoness that culminates in Spike storming away, the demoness asks Buffy to call him back to do it again, but to ask him to take his shirt off this time. Buffy kicks her in the face for the comment.
• Andrew reappears after having been avoiding the group for a while. Buffy's response is hilarious:
  Buffy: Andrew! Where've you been? I got the impression from some passive aggressive Facebook posts that you were mad at us.
• Andrew uses a novelty Captain America shield to block D'Hoffryn's beam attacks. It actually works.
• How does the group catch up to D'Hoffryn after he teleports away in the finale? Dialogue implies Spike wrote a sonnet in the book about Dawn's key power over portals working on Earth. Given he jokes on his being a "crap poet" later in the issue, one can only imagine what that sonnet says.
  • Even better, when D'Hoffryn is trying to offer the group wishes based on their wants that have been showcased throughout the season, he gets to Andrew... and has no idea what his name even is.
    Andrew: It's Andrew! Andrew Wells! I've been here the whole time!

Comics: Season 11

• Dowling comments on Buffy and Spike's Flirting Under Fire, as they're getting romantic in the middle of killing a sewer monster, of all things.
  Dowling: Monster, dead bodies, reeking sewer... who wouldn't feel romantic in such a magical setting?
• Jordan taunting Buffy about her soft-spot for supernaturals:
  Jordan: You got weak. Developed a vampire fetish. "Once you go Drac, you never go back," am I right?
  [Buffy tackles her down the stairs]
• Buffy and Spike lampshading the Sexy Discretion Shot trope:
  Buffy: But for now... pan over to the fireplace.
  Spike: We don't have a fireplace.
  Buffy: Do you want to get lucky or not?
  Spike: Fair point. I'll set something on fire.
• Before leaving the Safe Zone, Spike reminds Willow and Buffy to make sure Xander hasn't let the cats get too fat, as he's hopeless against their manipulations.
• Spike manages to find an underwater entrance into a government facility with the help of a seal who... seems to have a crush on him.
  Spike: ...Say hello to my rather large friend. I think she fancies me a bit.
  Buffy: I'll try to contain my jealousy.
• When the gang needs someone to impersonate the Vice President, all eyes immediately turn to Xander.
  Willow: [We need] Someone who can talk fast without actually saying anything. Someone who can dish out piles of B.S. without blinking.
  Xander: ...I can't decide if I'm offended or flattered.
• When Willow makes the switch between Xander and the real Vice President in his hotel room, the VP yells in surprise, alarming his security, who burst in with their guns ready. Xander, all glamoured-up to look like the VP, walks out in a tiny robe armed with the best cover story he could think of:
  Xander: Sorry guys, false alarm. Saw myself naked in the mirror. Not something I'd recommend, time has not been kind.
• When Jordan and the other Slayers who'd been working for the Safe Zone return to Buffy's doorstep to beg for their powers back:
  Spike: The bloody cheek! Sod off, the lot o' ya!
  Buffy: Easy, Spike. You're getting extra British. Don't pop your stitches.

Comics: The Origin

• Merrick is telling Buffy about Lothos, but she's just doodling hearts in her notebook.
  Buffy: Uh-huh, yeah. Oh, yeah, right.
  Merrick: I have huge antlers growing out of my buttocks.
  Buffy: Uh-huh, okay.
• Buffy points out one thing she has that her short-lived predecessors lacked: a keen fashion sense.
  Merrick: Vampires of the world, beware.
  Buffy: Merrick, you made a joke. Do you want to lie down? I know it hurts the first time.

Comics: Schrodingers Canon Comics

• At the end of the "Slayer, Interrupted" prequel comic miniseries, Giles has gone through all kinds of grief to win the honor of becoming Buffy's new Watcher, then proceeds to read her file, muses that Sunnydale is a stupid name for a town, and then gets a Big "WHAT?!" reaction to learning his new charge is named Buffy.