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Characters / The Greatest Freakout Ever

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Meet the Quires.

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    Stephen Quire
"Screw you."

The main subject of the freakout videos. As the titles would imply, Stephen freaks out over a variety of things, often resulting in him breaking something.

  • Ambiguous Disorder: He might be on the autism spectrum due to his over-the-top freakouts and him having his shirt off a lot.
  • Berserk Button: Touching him, preventing him from playing MMORPGs, telling him to do housework, calling him gay, interrupting what he's doing at the time, having Jack videotape him, the list goes on.
  • Big Bad: Of the videos, excluding 4, 16, 23, 26, and 27.
  • Butt-Monkey: Dear god, where do I even start? He is this every time Jack films him.
  • Catchphrase: Plenty, including...
    • "I DON'T CARE!"
    • "SHUT UP!"
    • "SCREW YOU!"
    • "OH MY GOD!"
    • "DON'T TOUCH ME!"
    • Also, he tends to pepper his vocabulary with the word "frickin'".
  • Celebrity Resemblance: The comments often point out that Stephen looks like Thomas F. Wilson, the actor who played Biff Tannen.
  • Even Evil Has Standards: He hates heavy cussing.
  • Fanboy: Of Batman.
  • Hair-Trigger Temper: You have no idea. He has destroyed property when he didn't get his way and is frequently screaming at his family.
  • Hates Being Touched: One of his biggest triggers is being touched.
  • Hidden Depths: In 23, he built a Batmobile from scratch, and it's actually pretty amazing. He's also a pretty decent artist, and he can cook very well.
  • Jerkass: His spoiled and violent behavior is why Jack video-tapes him in the first place. And he has no respect for his family.
  • No Indoor Voice: He doesn't so much say sentences as he does scream them.
  • Not Me This Time: Despite him being the Big Bad, he is completely innocent of any wrongdoing in 4, 16, 23, 26, and 27. In those, Jack is actually the main instigator. Though Stephen still broke the guitar in 4.
  • Psychopathic Manchild: The things he flies off the handle about include his mom canceling his World of Warcraft account and not being able to get the Chaotic Crossbow in RuneScape because his dad turned the internet off.
  • Spoiled Brat: If you look at the Quire household, you'd see that it's quite a large property and that it's pretty beautiful. Stephen, on the other hand, is more interested in what they don't have.
  • Teens Are Monsters: He was a teenager when the series first started.
  • Villain Protagonist: He's the main focus of the series and is a huge Jerkass with a short temper.
  • Would Hurt a Child: In episode 30, Stephen forcibly yanks his niece's loose tooth out, fed up with her constant complaining about the pain.

    Jack Quire
"Stephen, what're you doing?"

Jack is Stephen's brother, and the filmer of his freakouts. He's usually very mischievous and happy in the videos.

  • Annoying Younger Sibling: He sometimes intentionally tries to annoy Stephen.
  • Big Bad: In 4, 16, 23, 26, and 27, where he deliberately tries to annoy Stephen and push him over the edge.
  • Catchphrase:
    • "Okay..."
    • "Stephen, what're you doing?"
  • Jerkass: He posts videos of his brother's freak outs for people to laugh at. Also, he deliberately antagonizes Stephen sometimes.
  • Jerk with a Heart of Gold: He does get along with the rest of the family and he's usually the one who tries to stop Stephen from breaking anything.
  • Mr. Exposition: Explains to us the situation at the beginning of every video.
  • Mr. Fanservice: In the later videos, he's actually gotten quite attractive. Downplayed, since he doesn't show a lot of skin.

    David Quire 

    Jennifer Quire 

  • Reasonable Authority Figure: Her punishments such as grounding Stephen and taking away Jack's camera are well within reason, and she usually tries to talk some sense into them before actually punishing them.
  • Team Mom: She just wants to have a nice family, but this can be tricky with the rest of the house's jerkass tendencies (especially Stephen's).
  • Women Are Wiser: She is the only woman who lives in the house, and certainly the one who is the most level-headed.

    Betty Lou Quire 

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