Funny / Creepypasta

• Arthur Lost Episode

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• The ending of Bored? manages to be both creepy and funny, as the narrator informs the protagonist ("you") that whatever you're thinking of when you open the next door will be what's on the other side, so whatever you do, don't think about your deepest, darkest fear. The problem is, the narrator won't stop mentioning it:
  I'm warning you, if you’re thinking about it, stop. Don’t turn that doorknob until you’ve cleared it from your mind. Are you still thinking about it? You are, aren’t you?
• This "Survival Guide" for Creepypastas. This Dramatic Reading makes it even funnier, based on the Deadpan Snarker tone of the already Lemony Narrator.
  • "The GMod Suicide Mouse Survival Guide", created by the late GMod Crack Fic God kitty0706, is the perfect Nightmare Retardant for an otherwise disturbing video/story. Complete with a list of steps, a la the aforementioned "Survival Guide", Gag Dubs, and with special mention for #24: THIS VIDEO IS FAKE, AND SO ARE YOU, BLAAAAAAAHHH- oh yeah, 25, read these boring credits, okay?
• This version of "The Third Wish". Poor Elvis.
• "The Only Sensible Ritual Pasta" To say anything will spoil everything, but to suffice to say, putting a person not holding onto an Idiot Ball into a "ritual" Creepypasta means that Hilarity Ensues.
• A Few Suggestions, Slimebeast's prequel to his own Abandoned by Disney, which plays the eventual demonic infestation of Mowgli's Palace for comedy by recounting the events through the park employees' suggestion box notes. Even the eventual From Bad to Worse Sanity Slippage gets a funny little twist at the very end: the infamous photo-inverted Mickey suit only wants to hang itself up on a coat hook, clean up nicely after itself and all that..
  Suggestion: Guests are complaining about the amount of towels in their rooms.
  Suggestion: Need a better or newer coffee machine for the break room.
  Suggestion: I wasn't going to say anything because I'm pretty tolerant, but please stop admitting children without faces. They won't stay in the guest areas.
  Suggestion: Frank is cheating at solitaire when he thinks I'm not watching. Please do something about this immediately.
  Suggestion: Stop Frank, he's a menace. It has now spread to Sudoku. I am not making this up.
  Suggestion: I swear, all these blank kids are getting into everything. Every time I kill one of them the others just misbehave more. I keep finding them in piles at the bottom of stairways and they think its funny. It's not funny. I can't get through.
  Suggestion: ha ha I'm a mouse
  Suggestion: i can't get my head off i can't get my head off i cant get my head off i cant get my hed off i can't get my head of
  Suggestion: ignore last card it was my real head i forgot
• Whatever is equally funny and Nightmare Fuel laden. Basically, it's an open letter written by your average young single guy to a...thing...that lives in his home. This thing is apparently a frightening Eldritch Abomination, but his letter to it shows that he wants to be understanding and try to work out a livable situation that is good for the both of them. He just has a few issues to bring to the attention of "whatever":
  Please do not breastfeed while I'm eating. I want to respect your privacy, but often I can catch sight of you in various reflective surfaces, even if you're in the next room. Again, I can only take wild guesses here, so if you are not infact breastfeeding and/or these translucent beings are not truly children, accept my apologies though my complaint in general should stand. It's not so much the act itself that is distateful to me, but rather the sight of their internal organs.
  Do not contact me at work. I can tell that you want something, and that it is quite urgent, but calling or e-mailing me while I am at the office is pushing the boundaries of respectful behavior. Furthermore, I can't understand what you're saying and/or typing. I recieved your letter with the subject consisting of archaic pictograms, but Google Translate couldn't make heads or tails of it. In fact, I recieved an e-mail from Google's abuse department that simply said: "never again" in small, red letters. Perhaps this makes more sense to you than it did to me?
  IF YOU ARE GOING TO PUT GLASSES ON ANY WOODEN SURFACE IN THE HOUSE, PLEASE USE A COASTER. I don't care what's in them; water, juice, or the viscous orange ooze that recoils from bleach. Use a coaster.
  I'm tired of stepping on miniature cars everywhere I go around the house, and I'm tired of cleaning up tiny blood spatter from the passengers.
  Everyone is telling me that people are supposed to have thumbs. Everyone I know has thumbs. No matter how much I insist otherwise, they tell me that I too had thumbs. I'm not blaming you or anything, but this seems like something you might be involved in. I'm only basing this on your past behavior and mean no offense. It's entirely possible I'm correct and have never posessed them.
• Any good Trollpasta, with honorable mention to the classics THEN WHO WAS PHONE?, AND THEN A SKELETON POPPED OUT.
  • Silver Prison actually seems pretty scary at first until you read the Wham Line at the end.
    "For you see, I am a dorito."
    • On a similar note, the ending to My Perfect World, Shattered. The name of the scientist writing these entries? Dr. Ivo Robotnik.
• "Grim's Boss", a Lost Episode of The Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy. Is it a horrifying, cursed episode that drives people nuts? Nope. It's not only completely ordinary, but it actually sounds like the premise of an actual episode.
• This bit from IT Dept. Water Cooler Thread:
  Bandish: The headsets we've been using are antiquated pieces of crap. Can we please look into new ones? My users frequently complain that they can't hear me, and sometimes its so quiet I can't even hear them when they're screaming. Also, I'd greatly prefer it if we can have cordless headsets. I don't much care for the feeling of being chained to my desk.
  Michelle: I appreciate your concerns, Bandish. I've spoken to procurement several times about upgrading our headsets, and right now they're waiting on approval from Finance before they order any. I can't promise the new ones will be cordless, however. And, as much as I know you don't like it, being chained to your desk remains company policy for the time being. If you prefer being chained by your ankles instead of your wrists, that can be looked into. I know they can be chafing, at times.
• "Does Anyone Know a Good Plumber" is a ritual pasta with a protagonist who simply does not give a fuck, to Deadpool levels of not giving a fuck. He drunkenly agrees to perform a ritual after mistaking an Eldritch Abomination's profile for that of a hot girl, then proceeds to half-ass the entire thing and inadvertently summon a demonic, faceless Humanoid Abomination. However, he's more concerned with the leak in his shower and getting his cat found by the landlord, and shrugs off the supernatural occurrences.
  • The comments are filled with even more hilarity. He reveals he chucked a mop at the monster to get a reaction out of it (it didn't) and a commenter advises him to perform the ritual correctly so he can get a hell portal like the commenter did, which he has been using to hold barbecues and get rid of his trash.
• One of the highest-rated pastas of all time, The Boy Who Loved to Read. That wasn't a discount at all!
• Michael Leroi and crew's Bad Creepypasta, in which they read and mock creepypastas, including Jeff the Killer, SonicExe, and The Real Chuck E. Cheese, Squidward's Suicide, etc.
• Any Creepypasta being So Bad, It's Good.
• As it turns out, Rap Rat was real, but way less scary and more So Bad, It's Good than the pasta states. So who was responsible for finding the full source? Why, people who make Youtube Poop, of course! Naturally, Rap Rat became a recurring character, though not as popular as others, and was pooped by many of the members there. It's a prime example of Nightmare Retardant.
• A Favor for a Favor has an entertaining depiction of the Devil as well as a few amusing lines:
  "I wouldn't be surprised if a whole civilization of the nasty things were living in the walls, laying their repulsive egg sacks where ever they please and multiplying faster than an asian kid on Adderall."
• The ending to "Whistler". After house-sitting for his grandparents and accidentally taking the monster haunting the place with its obnoxiously loud whistling home with him, the note that the protagonist's grandparents sent him with his payment just says "Thanks." It probably took all their willpower not to add "sucker" to the end of that.
• This Bill Nye the Science Guy lost episode pasta starts out pretty standard, with Bill Nye and his cameraman being killed horribly in a fiery explosion and the kids in the audience are traumatized into insanity over it, but then the narrator, instead of reeling in horror at what he just witnessed, just nonchalantly points out all the Fridge Logic of this so called "lost episode" (the fact that the real Bill Nye is still alive and active, the fact that the explosion reduced Bill Nye and his cameraman to a jumble of bloody body parts yet somehow didn't affect the kids, etc.) and concludes that it's a fake. A bit of Fridge Brilliance in there too: the narrator was thinking like a scientist.
• The reveal of who was behind "Spongecry.avi" in the sequel "Spongecry.avi II": a crazy woman who was stalking one of the animators and used the "episode" as an opportunity to rant and whine about how he dumped her.
• This Pokémon creepypasta. Just... the whole thing is so ridiculous, and intentionally so. The Funetik Aksent of the narrator and the implication at the end that the protagonist was just drunk and dreaming the whole thing up are particularly hilarious.
• The Supermarket Monster. It has to be seen (and heard) to be believed. This makes quite a bit of sense, considering it was apparently written by Call Me Kevin.
  • "[Roger] lived in a big city where unusual things seemed to happen everyday. For example, his uncle died. Anyway[.]"
  • The reason why everyone in Roger's life turned on him? He decided to abandon his life as a banker in order to become a hobo (including changing his name from "Ron" to "Roger").
    Because of this his friends thought they didn’t like him anymore so they said “your our enimy now!!!” and Roger was like “oh no, I have no friends but loads of enimes ”
  • "He can only buy things when they are on sale so he oinly buys things when they are on sale because he doesn’t have any much money."
  • It is put on record that on the instances where he had enough money, Roger would buy chicken from the store and then go to KFC to try and get the workers to cook it for him. And because the workers are his "enimes", they proceed to do so, while also spitting on it.
  • Roger winds up getting so mad (due to sensing one of his "enimes" dying, which he hates for some reason), he somehow manages to punch the fat off the fat guy bothering him, leaving him skinny.
  • The description of what happens when the lights go out is rather humorous: mist comes out of cereal boxes, bacon begins flying around, pancake mix spills over the counters and the freezers begin freezing too cold for their contents.
  • The aforementioned fat guy accidentally freezing himself to death by walking into a freezer.
  • The occasional words being misspelled, like Roger complaining that he will "strve" if he doesn't get the bread and one of his "enimes" saying that the pancakes are too "string".
  • After getting out of the supermarket, Roger (via the narration) boasts for a bit about how he was able to survive. He then promptly goes back inside.
    Roger ran to a exit and was almost out when he tripeed on something, he looked down and saw his enimie saying “help me, the pancakes were too string” and then he said “no i am roger, you were ron’s friend not mine, smelly” and he ran out the door. He was safe, he got out, he escaped, he avoided death, he was alive, he was tall, he was safe, he was ROGER. Then he wenty back in for the bread but forgot about the monsters!
  • Just about every blatant inconsistency, like how Roger is mentioned to fall over dead after being devoured by the grocery monsters and claiming that his last words were vowing that he'd become a supermarket monster when just earlier it was said that his last words were "I am all your enemies". There's also the fact the story took place "a very long time ago" according to the beginning narration but later it's mentioned (twice!) that this is in the future.
• Tired Yet is packed with cliches, accidental innuendos, and ridiculous events, that can all be summed up in four words: That Mii, was Mii.
• Maud Pie's Death. Don't let the morbid name fool you. The story is hilariously terrible.
• This Peppa Pig creepypasta has a red eyed Mummy Pig command Peppa to eat Daddy Pig's cooked corpse. Peppa is forced to eat it and proceeds to vomit, while the other pigs (it's not specified who they are) eat the vomit (which overlaps with Nausea Fuel).
• Fuck oranges is the nonsensical story of a group of people being haunted by a being of pure hate, which turns out to have been summoned for a marketing ploy to make them buy lemons.
• The first thing the narrator of Driftwood says when he sees an undead deer come to life before him? "I don't have any money on me."
  What a stupid thing to say.
• That's the Last Time I Make a 2AM Burger Run has the narrator bump into an Eldritch Abomination with a similar idea. The entity (named Bragnarok) has to talk itself up to ordering food (complete with "Can I get aaauuuuuuuh..." when the time comes), and due to a Glamour Failure, everyone can see what it is (a tentacled creature wearing a miniature stormcloud like a cloak, surmounted by a conical, eyeball-studded head) and hear its private thoughts. It debates with itself wether it "deserves" a cookie, and, despite participating in a community run and walking all the way from its home dimension, decides that it would rather be able to fit into a planet come date night. Then it tries to pay for its "perfectly normal" order of six bacon cheeseburgers, cheesy fries, 200 nuggets, a dozen chicken tacos, and yes you guessed it, a diet coke, with a heap of ichor-soaked bones and insect corpses, and it reprimands itself with "they probably don't have change for that." Its excuse? "I just came from the casino and forgot to trade in my chips." It then goes to wait for its meal, thinking to itself (read: loudly broadcasting to everyone at the diner) about all the horrid things it did over the day. Then it thinks the narrator is broke because he only got a burger combo and decides to share some of its meal with him (by which we mean, gives him the massive plate of chicken tacos it already drizzled predigestive acid on). After it's done, it decides that it did want a cookie after all, but dang, they put them away for the night. Maybe it can snack on that other guy...
• Albeit still a horrifying story, the monster from The Harbinger Experiment constantly emitting Livin' in the Sunlight by Tiny Tim can come off as funny.
• "Letter to the Landlord": How do you make a demonic possession story funny? Have it told as complaints from the POV of an extremely annoyed renter. It gets better as the annoyed renter learns that it's a demonic entity, and is only upset that the demon is staying in his apartment without paying rent.

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