Characters / There Will Be Brawl

Matt Key (Luigi): "People wanna watch There Will Be Brawl because it's the entire Nintendo universe fighting. I mean, is way beyond the Mario Brothers, I mean, by end of the series we will have like 50 different characters that have made small little cameos parts in there, and that's..."
Paul Duraso (Mario): "That's what you always wanted as a kid. To play Mario and Zelda."

A Character sheet for the cast of the Deconstructive Affectionate Parody that is There Will Be Brawl. Now, we know that almost the entire cast is Darker and Edgier and many of them give away several Mythology Gags, so let's give those for granted already.

Now let's get rolling.

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     Our "Heroes" 

Luigi Mario
"It will not be a Melee. It will be a Brawl."

Mario's younger brother, a good man going through bad times, doing what he got to do. Secretly a drug dealer working with his not-friend Wario and some other not-so-noble activities, but he will still do what is right when it's needed.

  • Bad Ass Longcoat: Never seen without it. Until the finale at least
  • Batter Up: During his first fight, he uses a baseball bat as a weapon.
  • Deal with the Devil: Makes a bargain with Ganondorf for information.
  • Dramatic Shattering: In Episode 3. Yes, he does care for the Kingdom.
  • Gentle Giant: Somewhat. He is not a gentle as other giants, and he isn't that gigantic, but he IS kinder than most of the characters (the exceptions being Red and Peach), and he IS the second tallest characters in the show, shorter than only Ganondorf, so...
  • Heroic BSOD: Upon finding who the butchers are, and even more so when finding out Peach is dead. Who can blame him, when it basically means all he's been fighting for was worth nothing.
  • I Let Gwen Stacy Die: Before the movie started, he was unable to keep Kirby from killing Daisy.
  • Impressive Pyrotechnics: Oh, boy! His final attack was a darn big explosion.
  • My Greatest Failure: Failing to save Daisy.
  • Nice Hat: His customary green "Mario brother" hat.
  • Private Eye Monologue: Through the entire series.
  • Seeker Archetype: For most of the series, he just wants to understand what the hell is going on with his city.
  • Shut Up, Hannibal!: "I've had enough of your head games!" *punch*
  • The Stoic: Not that much, but there's certainly some degree of it.
  • Take Me Instead: In episode 6, when Red is captured and about to be interrogated, Luigi cannot bear the thought of letting it happen to someone as innocent as Red and shouts at Sheik to take him instead. It works.
  • Taking You with Me: He attempts this at the end with Kirby, Ness, and Lucas, but it turns out not to work.
  • Verbal-a Tic: He is a Mario brother, after all.

Mario Mario
"Alone? There are two Super Mario Brothers."

It's-a me, Mario! But not the same anymore. Our well known hero here has fallen into infamy and apparent depression. No longer a plumber, failed as a doctor, he nowadays resorts to drinking to drown his problems, but when Peach is kidnapped again, after falling at the bottom for a while, he got back up like never before, determined to rescue her.

  • Anti-Hero: He'll fight for the Mushroom Kingdom, but is very prone to violence and anger.
  • Aww, Look! They Really Do Love Each Other: While he does frequently insult Luigi and yell at him when things don't go right, he still loves his brother.
  • Ax-Crazy: Sometimes his fits of rage go too far.
  • Bad Ass: One of the best examples of the series. Especially during the finale.
  • Berserk Button: Never call Mario a plumber. Wario finds this out the hard way.
  • Big Damn Heroes: His arrival at the police department to rescue his brother and the others.
  • Big "NO!": Upon finding Yoshi's remains.
  • Bring My Red Jacket: Always wears his signature red shirt, and constantly gets into bloody fights.
  • A Day in the Limelight: Episode eight is pretty much all about him.
  • Drop the Hammer: Donkey Kong was on the wrong end of it.
  • Drowning My Sorrows: He spends most of the series as an alcoholic, but in Episode 8, upon seeing Peach's doll when he was about to take a drink, he realizes what he's doing and puts the bottle down.
  • Fallen Hero: How he starts.
  • General Ripper: He's pretty quick to assume Bowser is behind everything.
    Mario: "It is always-a Bowser!"
  • He's Back: In the finale when he puts his hat back on.
  • Limit Break: He performs his Final Smash against the Eldritch Abomination that is Game & Watch at the end.
  • Playing with Fire: Comes with Fire Flower in one scene and later unleashes a massive fireball attack with his Final Smash. And if that wasn't enough:
    Luigi: "Bro, you're playing with fire!"
    Mario: "The Super Mario Brothers are used to playing with fire!"
  • Rebel Leader:
    • When attacking the police station.
      Mario: "And you know me! If I can't do it myself... I will raise a fucking army!"
    • And even moreso in the final episode.
  • Rousing Speech: To Olimar's Cult. He brings them back to their senses, and then calls them all out to fight to reclaim the streets of their kingdom.
  • Supporting Leader: In the last episode, he leads his "fucking army" while Luigi confronts Kirby and the killers.

Princess Peach
"One child. No matter how far we fall, we are never past redemption as long as we can hear the laughter of one child."

Still the princess of the Mushroom Kingdom, Peach is having a hard time dealing with the newly corrupt city, while her relationship with Mario (and Luigi) is attempted to keep secret, yet it's causing her troubles. She's kidnapped by Ganon to clear the throne for his puppet, Zelda, and is executed by the butchers.

     Luigi's Allies 

Samus Aran
"Lucky for you, girls on my line of work have all sorts of contacts."

A popular stripper who uses her job to get plenty of information. Luigi recurs to her when seeking leads in his search for the princess, and from there onward she's been tagging along in his fight to save the kingdom. In the end, Samus dons her power suit one last time and participates in the final confrontation with Ganon and the butchers. She survives, but loses an eye.

"So, was I any good?"

A young Pokemon Trainer of an innocent and generous personality. He's possibly the only untarnished good guy of the entire cast. After he dares to stand up against Ganon, Ganon has Wario deliver a bomb that kills him. His death and subsequent funeral are arguably the biggest Tear Jerkers in the entire series, and spur Luigi and his allies on in their final assault on Ganon.

  • Cheerful Child: Despite everything that's happening around him.
  • Children Are Innocent: The most unambiguosly good character.
  • Dark Reprise: Done twice.
  • Kill the Cutie: After this, the villains are definitely beyond any redemption.
  • Meaningful Funeral: The end of Episode 9. Complete with a Dark Reprise of his theme tune.
  • Mons: Of course, if he has to do something for a fight, he'll do it with his Pokemon.
  • Morality Pet: Somewhat to Luigi; his death is what makes Luigi finally snap and attack Wario.
  • Red Herring: He was conspicuously hiding Jigglypuff from Luigi and his friends in the earlier episodes, and many viewers were suspicious enough of that to have either him or Jigglypuff pegged as the butcher. He gives his (completely innocent) explanation as he's dying, with his Last Words.
    Red: Luigi... I caught Jigglypuff! I didn't want you to know until I finished training her. She'll sing for you....
  • Tag Along Kid: He's this for Luigi and his allies.
  • Too Good for This Sinful Earth: At least, too good to survive in the corrupt Mushroom Kingdom.
  • Wide-Eyed Idealist / The Pollyanna: At first, his sunny disposition is strong enough to make him overlook his blatantly bad surroundings, such as insisting that the Pokemon fights, which everyone else treats as bloodsports, are just them "playing a little rough sometimes" and, in episode six, acting completely oblivious to the seriousness of the situation when he's captured by Sheik and about to be taken off to be brutally interrogated. However, he does have his occasional moments where he gains awareness of the situation while impressively not losing his purity or innocence, such as in episode nine, when he is the first to intervene in the standoff between Ganondorf and Captain Falcon. Goes into pure Crowning Moment of Awesome territory as he is visibly terrified by Ganondorf, yet steps forward anyway, telling him with a shaky voice to "Get out of our Kingdom!"

Star of Tingle's Gay Bar and Captain Falcon's personal bitch. As for himself, Pit is mostly innocent, yet not really heroic. He gets involved in the problems of Mario and Luigi, but remains mostly neutral about the situation. He has a change of heart at the end and convinces Captain Falcon to join the final fight against Ganon. He survives, but not before Ness and Lucas rip off his wings.

  • Domestic Abuse: Falcon angrily smacks him in the face at one point.
  • The Mole: For Captain Falcon, who sent him to stay informed of the situation.
  • Neutral No Longer: Towards the end, he decides he and Falcon cannot stay out of the battle any longer.
  • Non-Action Guy: He doesn't seem to have any combat skills.
  • Tag Along Kid: For Captain Falcon.
  • Took a Level in Badass: He was a True Neutral and Non-Action Guy party during most of the series, but at the end he has a change of heart at the end and convinces Captain Falcon to join the final fight against Ganon and take part in the final battle.
  • Winged Humanoid: As is to be expected of an angel. They get severed during the final battle, however.

Captain Falcon
"Come back sometime. Maybe... show me your moves."

The one in charge of Tingle's Gay Bar when the boss is out. Like his little boyfriend, Pit, he prefers to stay away from the conflicts arising around the city, but won't doubt to raise his legendary fist in order to rescue Pit when necessary. He skips town instead of helping Luigi take on Ganon, but Pit convinces him to turn back. He survives the final battle, and Luigi's courage reminds him of how to be a hero again.

  • Big Damn Heroes: His indisputable Crowning Moment of Awesome. And he gets another one near the end.
  • Domestic Abuse: He angrily smacks Pit in the face at one point. But he won't tolerate anyone else harming him.
  • Heroic Neutral: He just wants to care for his own and stay out of trouble... until the situations gets so bad that he cannot tolerate it any longer.
  • In the Name of the Moon: His lines and delivery leading up to the epic Falcon Punch would do Sanger Zonvolt proud.
  • Manly Gay/Macho Camp: He is still a total badass, but at the same time is also a flamboyant leatherdaddy toting an ascot.
  • Megaton Punch: His signature move gets featured with quite a bit of build-up.

    The Police Force 

"None of us are the heroes we're supposed to be."

Chief of the Mushroom Kingdom police department, and quite aware of how cynical he has become. He's willing to do what he has to in order to employ the law and bring down the mafia groups, regardless of what it takes. He comes to his senses and realizes he's being played by Zelda and Ganon, only for Zelda to stab him with the Master Sword. He recovers in the nick of time with a Maxim Tomato and makes his last heroic stand against Ganon, but fails—the sorcerer kills him.

"We'll rule this kingdom together!"

Former princess of Hyrule, a nation that has fallen and been absorbed into Mushroom Kingdom. She works for the police, either as an Office Lady as Zelda, or as a secret agent as Sheik. However, it seems that her ambitions go too far... It's revealed that, having lost her faith in Link, she's turned to Ganon to restore her to power. At the last minute she realizes the error of her ways—and is killed by Ganon when she tries, futilely, to save Link from his attack.

Ike & Marth
A couple (yes, in the romantic sense too) of officers working under Link's command at the police department. They pass out as mostly formal, but aren't really too nice. A flashback implies Marth's partner was Roy, before his death. Ike is mortally wounded in an alley brawl, prompting Marth to rethink his priorities. He joins Mario's army, and after Link's death becomes the new police chief, presumably doing a better job at it than Link did.

  • Adaptation Dye-Job: Ike is given black hair, likely to differentiate him from Marth, though it's shoulder length and straight rather than spiky.
  • Big Damn Heroes and Heel–Face Turn: Marth comes back to fight for Mario after Ike's apparent death.
  • Da Chief: Marth replaces Link as this at the end.
  • Dual Wielding: During the final fight, Marth shows up with his and Ike's sword.
  • Enemy Mine: Marth with Fox.
  • Police Brutality: They are not the best cops ever, nor the gentlest.
  • Red Oni, Blue Oni: Surprisingly, as opposed to their personalities in game, Marth's Red to Ike's Blue. Though they're mostly quiet, Marth comes across as much more hateful and merciless, openly mocking how much the Mario Brothers have fallen and even spitting at disgust at Luigi, who only wanted to help. Of course by the last episode, Marth becomes much more noble and responsible. Though just as arrogant, Ike seems to be less cruel and more dutiful. He also seems to be more sympathetic (despite his infamous quote), as he actually saves Luigi from getting shot by Falco, and actually reluctantly chooses to let Luigi go, prompting Luigi to come back and attempt to save him from Snake.
  • Straight Gay: They are in a relationship.

Saki and Isaac

Following the incapacitation and presumed death of Ike and during Marth's Character Development, these two were promoted to regulars.

  • Dropped a Bridge on Him: Vaporised by the Falcon Punch.
  • Jerk Ass: Even to their allies.
  • OC Stand-in: Like most of the characters, Isaac acts nothing like he does canonically, going from a noble silent warrior to a cruel and sadistic police officer. Especially since he is a minor character, and does not gain the justification behind their newer natures like more major characters (like Link and Bowser), with whom we get to learn what caused them to change so.
  • Screams Like a Little Girl: both of them

Meta Knight

"I'll be here... watching."

A... whatever he is, working for the Police Department for only one reason: Watch over Kirby. When Kirby escapes during a jailbreak, it seems Meta Knight will finally have his revenge on the cannibal... but Kirby kills him instead.

  • Bad Ass: He dedicates his whole life to prevent Kirby from escaping from prison.
  • Glowing Eyes of Doom: He is very menacing.
  • The Only One Allowed to Defeat You: He's been waiting a long time for an opportunity to fight Kirby to the death.
  • Red Herring: A lot of people guessed him as the butcher, thanks in part to believing him to be a Game Breaker in Brawl, and also due to Luigi's guess of the butcher being "fast and good with a blade."
  • Talking To Yourself: He and Kirby are both played by one of the series' creators, Matthew Mercer.

     Wario's Stable 

"Information sells high these days."

Sells drugs and engages in other unethical activities. Wario was working under Mewtwo's command until the mafia don was killed. Wario is potentially the most unlikable character in the series for how much of a jerk he is, and how willing he seems to be to backstab anyone as long as it benefits him. Working on Ganon and Zelda's orders, he sends the mail bomb that kills Red. Red's girlfriend, Leaf, tracks him down and kills him as revenge.

Played by Kyle Hebert. Yes, really.



Played by Jeff Lewis (you know, from The Guild!)

Wario's mentally disabled brother. Wario doesn't treat Wa very well, keeping him locked in a pen most of the time, but the fact that he looks after Wa at all is his sole redeeming quality. Wario heartlessly uses Waluigi to deliver the bomb that kills Red.

  • Children Are Innocent: Well, mentally he's a child, anyway. Subverted when Wario uses him to kill Red, but even then it's implied Waluigi doesn't realize that what he's doing is wrong.
  • Morality Pet: Subverted. He really does nothing for Wario's morality.
  • Mythology Gag: Most of Wa's lines are Shout Outs to the Mario spin-off titles he's appeared in.

Ice Climbers
They're working under Wario, and one of the most prominent examples of how far the Darker and Edgier setting has gone. They never speak, but you really wouldn't like to share a word with them. They're subdued by Marth in the final battle and presumably brought to justice.

  • Ax-Crazy: They have literally no characterization beyond this.
  • Chaotic Stupid: Is it a really a good idea to smack your brother on the head with your hammer in the middle of a battle and knock him out? No, but Nana did it anyway. Because she's evil and wanted to take Marth on mano-a-mano (AKA, Marth was duel wielding his and Ike's swords, so she wanted a second weapon).
  • Cold-Blooded Torture: They are in charge of delivering it, and enjoy it way too much...
  • Drop the Hammer: Their weapon of choice, like in the games.
  • Licking The Hammer: Nana.
  • Pink Girl, Blue Boy: The only difference between them.
  • The Voiceless: They seem to have no role in the universe beyond harming other people.


Used to be Mario's pet until he had to sell him and two other Yoshis to Wario for financial problem, after failing his medical practice. Yoshi seems to have grown aggressive and feral under Wario's watch. Still, when confronted by Mario, as he puts it, Yoshi remembers who the real Alpha Dog is. Killed by the Ice Climbers—at Zelda's command—to send a warning to Mario. (It doesn't work.)

     Kirby, "The Coral Cannibal"
"Only I can lead you to your butcher."

Forget everything you ever knew about the cute and lovable Nintendo character here, because this Kirby is a walking Homage to Hannibal "The Cannibal" Lecter. He was the monster who raised terror in the Mushroom Kingdom six years before the beginning of the series, until Mario and Luigi managed to stop and imprison him. During a jailbreak, Kirby kills Meta Knight and escapes. It turns out that he was the one who inspired Ness and Lucas to become the butchers. He kills Ganon and seems poised to begin a new reign of terror, but Luigi sets the building ablaze, apparently killing the cannibal once and for all... until Kirby resurfaces at the end, letting Luigi know he's alive and well elsewhere.

  • American Kirby Is Hardcore: Doesn't even begin to describe this...
  • Big Bad: Turns out he was behind the event that led to the creation of the Butchers.
  • Darkest Hour: His escape from and murder of Meta Knight.
  • Devour the Dragon: Implied that after the final battle he eats Ness and quite possibly Lucas to gain their PSI.
  • The Dreaded: Even years later, just about everyone in the city is scared shitless of him to the point that only the bravest among them call him by name.
  • Even Evil Has Standards - Subverted: This Kirby has no redeeming qualities. Still, as a Shout-Out to The Silence of the Lambs, Kirby pretends to have standards and behaves defensively over Peach when another inmate offends her while she was visiting him.
  • For the Evulz: His typical motivation for killing his victims. This in fact worked to his advantage during his reign, as it made it extremely difficult for the police to capture due to the fact he murdered indiscriminately.
  • Hannibal Lecture: Given the influences, this was inevitable.
  • I'm a Humanitarian: After all, his power in the games is eating his enemies.
  • It's Personal: For Luigi: he killed Daisy in the backstory.
  • Karma Houdini: Yet another trait he takes from Hannibal Lecter. When we last see him, he has made his way to Nintendo HQ and apparently just killed Masahiro Sakurai prior to calling Luigi.
  • The Man Behind the Man: Guess who's the Big Bad.
  • Manipulative Bastard: To a nightmarish degree.
  • Mind Screw:
    • The entire series was just him doing this to Luigi, using everyone else as tools
    • To the fans: he tricks Luigi into dropping hints that Meta Knight or someone similar might be the butcher. He outright implies it when he says that Meta Knight has come to understand the mind of a killer quite well. He then shows up with Meta Knights's mask, sword and voice in the finale, as he reveals the true butcher(s) was just his pawn.
  • Not Quite Dead: Well, honestly, anyone who has seen The Silence of the Lambs shouldn't be surprised with this.
  • Retired Monster: Once Peach sentences him to life in jail. Averted after Mario accidentally lets him out of prison.
  • Slasher Smile: He's good at these.
  • Sugar Apocalypse: He inflicted this on his own homeland. The damage could never be undone. He later tried to do the same to the Mushroom Kingdom and was only captured when Meta Knight stepped in.

    The Four Dons 

King Dedede
"The last thing this city needs is more bloodshed."

One of the four mafia dons, and the most likable around the kingdom, having gained popularity among both the poor and the rich. He runs a whorehouse and is somewhat unfriendly when dealing with people, but despite his position, he wishes for the arising crisis to end. Killed by the butchers not long after his first and only scene.

"Your kingdom will know its new ruler. And if it doesn't, it will burn."

Another of the mafia mobs, still resenting the Old Shame that was the fall of Hyrule, mostly due to the fact the kingdom fell due to a bad economy rather than his minions and magic. He plans to take over Mushroom Kingdom, manipulating everyone he can in order to get his way. He kidnaps Peach and tries to set Zelda in her place as his puppet monarch, using Mr. Game & Watch as his army and Ness and Lucas to eliminate his rivals, but he loses control of the two butchers to Kirby, who kills him.


"Those were the good days, weren't they?"

One of the four mafia dons and Mario's Arch-Enemy, but as he says to Luigi, days like these are no longer fit for old fashion brawlers like Mario and him, so he has grown apathetic, losing interest in villainy. Now he only cares about enforcing order among the Koopas. Despite being the main suspect for having kidnapped Peach, it turned out he didn't. Bowser was poisoned by Ganon and Mr. Game & Watch in their bid to conquer the Mushroom Kingdom, but chooses to take out as many of the G&Ws as possible with a suicide bomb.


One of the four mob bosses who run the Mushroom City's streets—until his untimely death. The police found his internal organs stuffed into a Pokeball. Ouch. Mewtwo was apparently a ruthless mafia don who nonetheless cared for his fellow Pokemon. In the final episode, we learn that in response to Kirby's rampage, Mewtwo tried to create a psychic army by experimenting on orphaned children. Two of his creations, Ness and Lucas, fell under Ganon's thrall.

  • Go Mad from the Revelation: Implied. Kirby is said to have "whispered" to him, and and afterwards he tried to raise the children as part of a "psychic army". It's possible that Kirby used him to set the Butcher event in play in the event that he would be arrested. If so, he's also an...
  • Hoist by His Own Petard: Mewtwo was murdered by the very two children he tried to use as psychic weapons.
  • Loners Are Freaks: According to Wario, Mewtwo spent almost all of his time in solitude.
    • Mythology Gag: Just like he did in the games you could catch him in; he is in solitude at the bottom of Cerulean Cave.
  • Man of Wealth and Taste: He's shown wearing a white suit/black tie/sunglasses combo (a Shout-Out to a piece of Fan-Art the creators took a shine to).
  • Posthumous Character: Though, given how the model looks later on when we see him, it would probably be nigh impossible to have an actor in that kind of suit anyway.
  • Psychic Powers: Not that they did him any good.
  • Wicked Cultured: The series implies this.

     Vagrants and Loose Ends 

Donkey Kong & Diddy Kong

They first appeared kidnapping Luigi for Ganondorf, and later as bouncers in Dedede's bar covering the whorehouse. Mario nearly kills Donkey Kong in a rage when he sees the ape with his former girlfriend, Pauline. Diddy tries to kill Mario in the final brawl, but ultimately puts it behind him.

Fox, Falco & Wolf

"Wave of future! Everyone having one!" (Regarding Landmasters)

Three bandits wandering around the dark alleys. They easily scream trouble from a mile away. Wolf is killed by Marth in an alley fight, while Falco is sacrificed by Olimar's cult. This prompts Fox to rethink his life and join Mario's crusade. He's killed defending Marth, Ike's boyfriend, from Mr. Game & Watch.

Snake & Sonic


Both Canon Immigrants appear depicted as homeless and crippled, surviving however they can around dark alleys, and seem to be look after one another in order to survive any hardship that comes their way. They unfortunately were cut from the final episode due to time constraints, but were originally going to appear.

  • Back Stab: Snake attempted this on Ike, in a possible reference to the fact that one of the earliest screenshots of the game showed Snake grabbing Ike by behind.
  • Canon Immigrant
  • Companion Cube: Snake seems too affective with his box.
  • Handicapped Badass: Being in a wheelchair doesn't seem to stop Sonic from giving his part when the time to fight comes.
  • Shellshocked Veteran: Snake

Captain Olimar
"We must have... sacrifice!"

Known as "End of Days", and damn insane. His actions and lines are the creepiest, his motives incomprehensible. If he's present, expect something nasty to happen. He's recruited by Mr. Game & Watch—his so-called demons—to join Ganon's plot to overthrow the Mushroom Kingdom. In the end, G&W kills him in a frenzy during the final brawl.

Mr. Game & Watch

Usually black (but also seen of other colors) 2-dimensional beings seen around the Mushroom Kingdom, usually in minor roles. It's unclear if they're separate beings or if they share a Hive Mind. They were the first inhabitants of the Mushroom Kingdom and secretly harbored a hatred for its current citizens. They make a deal with Ganon to help them reclaim the kingdom, acting as his army, but are killed by Mario in the final brawl.

Ness and Lucas


Two little kids seen around the alley at one point, serving as Luigi's inspiration for going on fighting. Their role is a little expanded for some of the scenes of the finale, but they are pretty much background characters. Just kidding. Later they revealed to actually be the butchers, endowed with Psychic Powers from Mewtwo's experiments and taken in by Ganondorf—and, later, Kirby. They are able to kill by using their powers to rip the organs right out of their victim's bodies (also using a snake and baseball bat for more damage) and you don't even want to know what they do to the bodies afterward. It is implied that Kirby eats them (or at least Ness) after the final battle.

"Fuck it, we'll do it live!"

The popular Koopa anchorman of Channel 8 News, Lakitu hasn't given up his ties to the mafia. He uses his position to influence public opinion against the Mario Brothers.

    Cameos and minor characters