Vince Noir's best friend, constantly attempting, in vain to make a better life for himself but always failing due to his High Opinion of himself and general insufferability. He worked at the Zooniverse with Vince, Naboo, Bollo and Bob Fossil in series 1, then moved into an apartment in series 2 and later worked at Naboo's antique store in season 3.
Small Name, Big Ego: At any given moment, Howard might call himself an artistic visionary, a nature photographer, a genius salesman, an inventor, or an undiscovered acting talent with "willowy" legs and an impressive mustache. He's usually proven wrong.
Vague Age: Continuity is totally ignored in the series, so Howard's true age is never revealed. Howard once stated he was 32, Ten years older than Vince, yet he's also claimed to be 50 years old, and in other episodes he despairs at the fact that he looks like an old man, even though he's the same age- sometimes it's implied that he's known Vince since they were babies, other times it's hinted that he took Vince out of school to be his apprentice at the Zooniverse.
Vince is Howard's vain, shallow, flighty and impossibly attractive best friend. Exceptionally Low on IQ, but makes up for it by possessing the social skills and large eyes that Howard so conspicuously lacks.
Ambiguously Bi: Vince is incredibly camp and flamboyant, and if he is anything like his brain cell, is probably bisexual.
Attractive Bent-Gender: Vince proudly claims this status. While he doesn't usually dress like a woman, he's frequently mistaken for one. Sometimes he's considered attractive, while other times he's called Howard's ugly wife.
Vince Noir: I'm the great confuser! 'Is it a man? Is it a woman? Oh, I don't think I mind...'
Brutal Honesty: In the radio show version of 'Tundra', when Howard tries to kill himself out in the tundra by going out and dying there, he keeps coming back to his tent, and Vince points out that it's because he's got one leg shorter than the other.
Fruedian Excuse: His obsession with material possessions and fame seem to be motivated by being raised in a forest by a father who would leave him alone for weeks at a time. If you lived in a treehouse made of bus tickets in a place full of monsters called The Forest of Death you'd want some luxury too.
Hidden Depths: Selfish, vain and incredibly air-headed, but is a talented painter, hair dresser, story teller, and is extremely gifted with a sewing machine to the point of making most of his own clothes and some of Howard's. He's also a talented singer (Despite what Bryan Ferry says). He's also brave, loves animals, and can be surprisingly kind when he isn't distracted by something shiny.
Hooked Up Afterwards: His prolonged make out session with Howard came after the party was done. Didn't last very long.
It's All About Me: Vince is rather selfish, and although he has the brain of a child, he has none of the innocence of one. Usually Howard is the only person he'll put himself in danger for.
YMMV. At least in the very first series; Vince is rather naive and innocent, at one point being in denial that his gorilla friend is dying, despite Howard's attempts to prepare him for the worst. Also in "The Strange Tale of the Crack Fox" Vince is simply too trusting and sympathetic to an evil fox and a tramp who was planning on raping him.
Not to mention, Vince often ends up saving the day by befriending creatures by doing kind deeds for them, like fixing the Ape King's hair or offering a tramp his cape.
Popular Is Dumb: Vince is... not very bright, and enjoys 'simple' tasks such as playing with toy cars; and expressly states at one point that he is confused by sentences that don't relate to fashion in some way
Pretty Boy: He's so pretty that he's frequently mistaken for a girl, usually Howard's wife or girlfriend.
A long suffering and cynical shaman who attempts to live a peaceful life with his best friend and familiar, Bollo the Ape, but finds his life constantly dirupted by his two colleagues and later roommates, Howard and Vince. Naboo is almost always high; he does not get along with the other Shamans, especially Saboo.Naboo is technically an alien, and posseses no genitals.
Tropes associated with Naboo:
Affably Evil: Naboo is a drug dealer, yet he's the only sane character and gains much of the audiences sympathy.
Talking Animal: Became this in the TV show; in the radio show only Vince can understand him.
Undying Loyalty: To Naboo- he goes virtually everywhere Naboo does. He's very fond of Vince, too.
Bob Fossil (Rich Fulcher)
The extremely odd manager of The Zooniverse, originally a sort of Ineffectual Sympathetic Villain but after the Re Tool became a sort of strange ally to Vince, although he always hated Howard. Fossil ran a zoo but didn't know the names of any of the animals, and sometimes vented his frustration by throwing small children into cages. He had an enormous crush on Dixon Bainbridge and is shown to be almost kind without his presence.
The Ditz: Fossil switches from being a Cloud Cuckoolander to a complete freak in a couple of minutes, become obsessed with Howard, Paper Cups and His 'Talk Box' (actually a tape recorder) in which he stores the names of his animals so as not to forget them. He calls the elephant 'The Grey Leg face man' for example.
Dumb Muscle: Is a sort of punching bag for Dixon Bainbridge.
Even Evil Has Standards: Was clearly very upset when Dixon Bainbridge stole credit for writing Vince's Charlie novels. He'll murder Vince for Bainbridge without a thought but stealing someone's art? That is just mean.
Hilariously Abusive Childhood: In the radio show "So my mom used to throw eggs in my bunker at breakfast and call me "Wimp Womp! And my dad used to dress up and scream at us, 'I'm a Chinese bear, walkin' around the wig hut!' Yeah!"
Except in the radio version of "Mutants", where he was keeping a bunch of mutants in his secret laboratory on a mountain.
Jerkass:.. is putting it lightly, particularly in the radio show where he was the closest thing to a main antagonist as a surreal comedy show is going to get. He feeds a little boy to the lions in the first episode, for corn's sake!
Jerk with a Heart of Gold: Has a very well hidden nice side. In "Charlie", he looks shocked and visibly disturbed when Dixon and Hamilton steal the credit for writing Vince's books, even though he normally sides with Dixon on literally everything.
Badass Bookworm: Dude goes to the Arctic Tundra, alone, survives falling off a cliff (his fall was broken by a wolf, which he then killed with a gun hidden in his mustache, but still), then makes his way back to England, goes off to the Tundra alone again, and somehow finds the fake Egg of Mantumbi, survives being frozen by the terrible "Icy Bastard", who he attempted to fist-fight, thaws himself out with heat hidden in his mustache, goes back to England using a whale's jawbone (he killed the whale, somehow) as a raft to get to another continent, then goes back to England, back to the Tundra, where he finds the real Egg of Mantumbi, and is celebrated as the best explorer and man of action who ever lived. Oh, and he's apparently smart enough to splice together man and snake. Bad. Ass.
Large Ham: He's played by Matt Berry, this was inevitable.
Playing Gertrude: Male version. He's clearly meant to be in his late forties to mid-fifties, but he's played by an actor who is actually younger than Noel Fielding, who plays Vince as somewhere in his twenties(and very early thirties in series 3).
Wicked Cultured: Swears, beats people up and drinks, but he's almost never seen out of a suit and says things like, "I said 'Good day, sir!' to end phonecalls.
Not so Above It All: He's one of the more frightening villains on the show (along with the Crack Fox and the Spirit of Jazz), but he's still delighted by a toy car Vince offers to sell it, declaring he will play with it when he gets home.
Pet the Dog: When The Hitcher caught Jack The Ripper (long story) stabbing up a woman, he killed him out of disgust because he 'doesn't hold for that sort of thing'.
Should be taken with a pinch of salt, as he is perfectly willing to do everything else to them.
Informed Flaw: Parodied and played for laughs. Everyone, especially Saboo, treats Kirk as a sort of sleeping monster, claiming he is 'a vehicular menace, mowing down everyone in his path,' or that he is a 'violent and sexually deranged being' whilst none of this is ever shown on screen, and to the audience Kirk simply seems like an adorable little boy.