I Just Want to Be Loved

"And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity"
The Bible, Colossians 3:14

"...for love is as strong as death..."
— Song of Solomon 8:6

"Aah! Aah! "Band of Brothers"? "The Pacific"? None of this means anything to you? All those motels, you never once watched HBO? Not once? "Girls"!. You're my Marnie, Moose. A-and Hannah, she just- she *needs* to be loved. She deserves it. Don't we all? You, me? We deserve to be loved. [shouting emotionally] I deserve to be loved! [softly, almost whispering] I just want to be loved."
—Crowley from Supernatural revealing to Sam that all his actions were mean to only one end: be loved.

Wish Fulfillment is an undeniable part of all fiction, and there is nothing at all wrong with it, in and of itself. I Just Want to Be Loved is a specific wish that some members of the audience would like to have fulfilled by the fiction they consume.

This wish is usually (but definitely not exclusively) expressed by females. Because at least some women believe that family is everything, said women are more likely to care about being loved, as opposed to actually doing something really cool. Feminists of multiple stripes (from radical types to completely sane and reasonable feminists) hate this. As such, this trope is seen as having its share of Unfortunate Implications about what women should aim for in life. In spite of these implications, the wish still exists and much media does indeed aim to fulfill it.

Note however that Tropes Are Not Bad. If a work appeals to this wish, it is not automatically Bad Writing or inherently sexist.

Contrast: I Just Want to Be Badass.

Related to: I Just Want to Be Beautiful.

See Also: Wish Fulfillment, I Just Want to Have Friends, I Just Want to Be Normal, I Just Want to Be Special.


Examples:

    open/close all folders 

    Anime And Manga 
  • Alois from Black Butler. It gets so bad that eventually he doesn't care whether it's Claude, and sells his soul to Hannah instead because she was pretty much the first person since Luka to earnestly say "I love you".
  • Miyako Miyamura's goal in ef - a fairy tale of the two. is this, ever since her parents's messy divorce that had them ignoring her completely.
  • This, coupled with I Just Want to Be Normal and I Just Want to Have Friends, and besides her wish to Kill All Humans, is what moved Elfen Lied's Lucy all her life. In fact, this is what moves most main characters in this series.
  • Despite what he'll tell you, this and I Just Want to Have Friends are the primary driving forces for Greed in Fullmetal Alchemist. By extension, Father also wants this.
  • Lyrical Nanoha:
    • Fate Testarossa just wanted to be loved by her dearest mother who tortures her on regular basis because she hates how Fate (who is a clone) resembles her deceased daughter. She gets everything she wished, though: she gets a new family (the Harlaowns) and later becomes one Vivio's two mommies with Nanoha. People even call the three of them "the Takamachi family". Probably the Most Triumphant Example of this trope in Girls Love.
    • On a non-eros(?), Hayate Yagami. From an orphan to being one of the aces, adored by her immediate underlings who are also her surrogate family.
  • Midori Days: Seiji "Mad Dog" Sawamura is a tough delinquent with a heart of gold who is lonely in love because girls reject him as being too scary. One day he begs heaven to send him a girlfriend, no matter who she is, and a girl named Midori, who—unbeknownst to him—was in love with him but too shy to confess, is inexplicably transformed into a miniature hand-puppet-like replacement for his right hand. Thus begins an unusual love story.
  • Naruto:
    • Hinata has always wanted to be loved and acknowledged by her family, who were abusive to her to the point where they stripped her of her rightful birthright as heiress to the Hyuga clan because they perceived her kind, gentle nature for weakness and even disowned her for a time, during which she had to live with her sensei Kurenai.
    • Naruto himself only wishes to be loved and approved of, which is why he pulled pranks and acted like the class clown. This was also his (initial) reason he wanted to be the Hokage.
  • All Neon Genesis Evangelion's Shinji Ikari ever wanted was someone to love him, and when he finally found that person in Kaworu Nagisa, he lost him in one of the most horribly heart-breaking ways imaginable.
  • Guts from Berserk. Having lived a life full of struggle, blood and battle, and trauma, Guts more than anything just wants to be loved, having been denied it for so long along with being sexually abused as a kid. He eventually finds it with his teammate Casca - who also yearned for the same - but their union is tragically abrupted when the Eclipse happens and Casca is driven insane, amnesiac, and mute. This pretty much sent Guts over the edge himself and he tried to wash the pain away by feeding his bloodlust and hatred, but in the end it didn't compare to the feelings and memories he had with Casca. Now, Guts desperately wants to find a cure for Casca's insanity so that they can mend their fragmented relationship, and it's made all the more difficult since Guts' Enemy Within constantly goads him to take advantage of his mentally and sexually traumatized lover - which he almost did at one point - and as a result Guts has clashing feelings of wanting to be with Casca and feeling shame for wanting her since it puts her in danger.

    Comic Books 
  • In Dork Tower, Matt McLimore's ongoing desire to be involved with someone repeatedly pushes him back to his ex-girlfriend, Kayleigh... even while his dream girl, Gilly the Perky Goth, hovers nearby.
  • Irredeemable. This is the Plutonian's motivation for being a superhero after spending years in several foster homes with people who were afraid of him. Despite being a respected champion, he's so obsessed with the negative comments and constant demands people give him that it drives him over the edge.

    Fan Fic 
  • There are probably too many fanfics to list that appeal to this wish. The appeal of the Relationship Sue is arguably derived from this wish (as well as the specific desire to be loved by a particular character).

    Films — Animated 

    Films — Live-Action 
  • The main character of (500) Days of Summer has this motivation.
  • All of the daughters in Eat Drink Man Woman, to various degrees.
  • In Citizen Kane, Charles Foster Kane is a total bastard who manipulates everyone around him with no interest in or respect for their feelings, but all he really wants is to be loved. He gets yelled at for this by many other characters, but the real problem is Kane's inability to love anyone back.

    Literature 
  • Twilight fulfills this wish. The whole point of Bella being an Audience Surrogate is so the audience can indulge their wish to be loved by Edward Cullen.
  • The Romance Novel exists to fulfill this wish.
  • Ayn Rand, in her novel Atlas Shrugged, deconstructs the trope as well as gender-flips it via the character of James Taggart. James wants to be loved, but not for anything he actually does. Rather, he wants to be loved for himself. Not for the benefits he might bring into the life of the person that loves him. Not for any of his virtues or good qualities. He says that he wants to be loved for himself. Ultimately, what he truly wants is to be loved for absolutely no reason at all, i.e. loved in spite of his own worthlessness.
  • In The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy Ford and Arthur try to flatter their Vogon captors poetry to avoid being thrown out of the airlock. The Captain asks them if they're saying that he writes poetry because "Underneath my callous exterior, deep down, I just want to be loved?" Subverted when he announces that he actually writes poetry to throw his callous exterior into sharp relief, and they're going to be thrown out the airlock anyway.

    Music 
  • Rick Astley's "Never Gonna Give You Up" shamelessly panders to this wish.
  • Most Boy Band songs fulfill this wish as well.
  • A Papa Roach song has this line in the chorus.
  • Queen's "Somebody To Love".
  • Prozzak's "I Want To Be Loved."
  • There are many romantic ballads featuring the singer singing about how they really love "you" the person they are singing to.

    Live Action Television 
  • Jon Lovitz of Saturday Night Live did an impression of Harvey Fierstein (playwright of Torch Song Trilogy). The parody version of Fierstein had a variant of this as his Catch-Phrase. "I just want to be loved. Is that so wrong?"
  • Phoebe of Charmed made it her personal mission to find love during the last few seasons. In the end, she got a Cupid. Yay?

    Theatre 
  • Chrysothemis in Richard Strauss's opera Elektra, who does not share her sister Elektra's thirst for revenge, and just wants to be a simple wife and mother — and this wish is what sustains her in her dark, fearful time as a prisoner. (Note: this is not her characterisation in the original Sophocles play.)

    Video Games 

    Western Animation 

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