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Villains
Dr. Johann
Dr. Johann
He seems nice but he's really not
Voiced by: Tom Kenny
An abusive retirement home doctor, who turns old people into food.- Back-Alley Doctor: Dr. Johann is very abusive to his patients and shouldn't even be a doctor.
- Evil Wears Black: He's got black shoes, and zero qualms with killing old people.
- Human Resources: Dr. Johann graphs the DNA of sea creatures onto unconscious old people and turns their growths into food at Red Lobster.
- Light Is Not Good: He sports a white lab coat and he turns elders into food which is served at Red Lobster.
- Mad Doctor: Dr. Johann's basic villain archetype.
Karla 9000
Karla 9000
Voiced by: Grey DeLisle
An A.I. police car, who Kevin dated.- A.I. Is a Crapshoot: Karla 9000 starts off as this amazing AI car that really helps Kevin with police work but then eventually turns into a villainous robot, who tries to take her driver down.
- Casting Gag: This isn't the first time in which Grey DeLisle voices an A.I. for another law enforcement/heroic team of some sort.
- Companion Cube: In her debut episode, she was a romantic version of this to Kevin.
- Domestic Abuse: Karla was a very domineering, stalkerish, and mildly abusive girlfriend to Kevin.
- If I Can't Have You…: See Yandere below.
- Interspecies Romance: She and Kevin are a human/car relationship, which was seen as being very progressive relationship in the public's eyes.
- Not Good with Rejection: She drives Kevin off a cliff when he tries to break up with her.
- Punny Name: Her name (Karla) is a pun on the fact she's a car.
- Sentient Vehicle: Karla is a talking vehicle.
- Yandere: After Kevin tries to break up with her, she drives herself off a cliff with Kevin inside.
Satan
Satan
Voiced by: Rocky Russo
A big red demon, who rules over Hell.- Bald of Evil: A hairless demon.
- Big Red Devil: Satan has horns, hooves, red skin, and a tail.
- Bullying a Dragon: Bullet did this to him in "Flip the Vote", by dying and going to Hell by overdosing on meth, trolling with him and then getting revived by someone on Earth with a EpiPen.
- Dark Is Evil: Satan has black horns and hooves.
- The Devil Is a Loser: Satan is portrayed as an idiotic, incompetent loser, who fails at everything he does.
- Evil Wears Black: He rules Hell and he wears some black.
- Harmless Villain: For the evilest being in the universe and the embodiment of all darkness, Satan sure plays fair. In "Dungeons & Dragnet", Satan made a bet that if Randall could beat him in a game of Dungeons & Dragons, he would leave them alone. Now, since when did Satan become a good sport?
- Psychopathic Manchild: He acts a lot like a spoiled, bratty 7-year-old girl, loving to role-play and cosplay as Wanda Lynn and then throwing a huge childish tantrum over losing to Randall in a Dungeons & Dragons game.
- Satan: Yep; it's even in his name.
- Sissy Villain: Satan is obsessed with the female Dungeons & Dragons character, Wanda Lynn. He even plays with dollies of her, hangs pictures of her up on his wall, and even dresses up as her. He also dresses up as the Suicide Squad (2016) version of Harley Quinn.
- Sore Loser: He has a Villainous Breakdown when Randall beats him in a Dungeons & Dragons game.
- Villainous Breakdown: He childishly throws a fit after Crawford beats him in a Dungeons & Dragons game.
- Villainous Crossdresser: Being Satan himself doesn't stop him from dressing up as Harley Quinn (the one from Suicide Squad (2016)) and Wanda Lynn (a female character from Dungeons & Dragons).
- Walking Shirtless Scene: In his default outfit, there's nothing covering his chest.
General Bumfuqué
General Falola Bumfuqué
some caption text
Voiced by: Cedric Yarbrough
An African warlord who kills 10-year-old girls.- African Terrorists: His archetype.
- Bread, Eggs, Milk, Squick: His hobbies include crocheting, playing the violin, and preteen girl genocide.
- Crazy Jealous Guy: Kills 10-year-old girls because, when he was a kid, his love interest rejected him and went out with Obama instead.
- Enfant Terrible: He was three-years-old when he killed his own parents.
- Green and Mean: He sports green and he kills preteen girls.
- If I Can't Have You…: His mentality when his love interest rejected him.
- Not Good with Rejection: When he was 10, he asked out a Kenyan girl his age to the Shake-a-Zulu dance and she rejected him. Thus began his life long crime spree of killing 10-year-old girls.
- Punny Name: While it's not pronounced exactly like that, "Bumfuqué" could be read as "bumfuck", which leads to a mixup.
- Red Herring: When trying to solve the mystery of who shot her in the head as a little girl, Gina was led to believe the culprit was General Bumfuqué because her only clue was a picture of herself as a little girl and "Bumfuque" written on the back. So, she traveled all the way down to Uganda and slaughtered a team of guards just to get up in person with him only for him to point out that his name is "Bumfuqué" with an accent above the "E" and the picture just says "Bumfuque". Gina realized this was the name of the next town over from Paradise, making her realize this whole ordeal was just a big waste of time.
- Later on in that episode, the girl who rejected him when he was 10 travels all the way to Bumfuque to get revenge on him for nearly killing her as a child, only for Gina to explain the mixup and for her to realize her mistake the same way Gina did, earlier.
- Self-Made Orphan: General Bumfuqué killed his parents with a plastic knife when he was only three.
- Spell My Name With An S: It's very important to note the accent above the "E" at the end of his name.
- Would Hit a Girl: He has no qualms with killing preteen girls.
- Would Hurt a Child: Indeed, he prefers hurting children, though he's more specific with which children he kills because he really hates preteen girls.
The Jabowski Family
The Jabowski Family
From the left, Mr. Jabowski, Cooter, Gina (center) to right, Mrs. Jabowski, Bo, Granny, and Baby
Voiced by: Roger Black (Bo), Sarah Chalke (Mrs. Jabowski), Kyle Kinane (Jim)
Gina's birth family. To say that she turned out quite differently from the rest of her family is quite an understatement.Click here to see spoilers - Abusive Parents: Mr. and Mrs. Jabowski force their children to participate in their criminal schemes and show no regard for their wellbeing.
- Archnemesis Dad: Mr. Jabowski to Gina, as he's a criminal and she's a cop.
- Bulletproof Human Shield: Gina's dad used her as this, when the family was on the run from the cops. Gina got a bullet lodged in her head, which made her comatose for 11 years. When she woke up, she didn't remember anything about her life before being crippled.
- Children Are Innocent: Baby Jabowski seems to be the most "normal" of the family being a baby. Subverted as "Fetal Attraction" reveals she's a villainess.
- Cop/Criminal Family: Gina is a police officer in Paradise and her family members are bank robbers and drug dealers.
- Enfant Terrible: It's revealed in "Fetal Attraction" that Baby is anything but innocent, as shown when she shanked Kevin's neck with a dagger.
- Even Evil Has Loved Ones: The Jabowski Family truly loves and cares for each other and they've even proven to sincerely love Gina, despite her becoming a cop.
- The Family That Slays Together: A family of evil criminals, rob banks and kill people.
- Fat Bastard: Along with being a criminal, Cooter is a Fat Idiot.
- Fat Idiot: Cooter is very fat and he likes putting crayons up his nose. And his butt.
- Gene Hunting: Gina came across her biological family more or less by accident.
- It's All About Me: While running from the cops, Mr. Jabowski betrayed Gina (his own daughter), using her as a human shield when she was a child. Although he swore this would never happen again, he immediately proceeded to use every other family member as a human shield, when Gina finally shoots back at him.
- Like Parent, Unlike Child: Gina's parents are unrepentant criminals, while she is a dedicated (albeit fanatical) police officer.
- No Name Given: The first name of Mrs. Jabowski was never revealed and neither was the name of the family baby or Granny, for that matter.
- Nose Shove: Played for Laughs but Cooter sticks crayons up his nose.
- Token Good Teammate: Gina, to such a degree, that her dad thought she was one of his "coward sperm".
- Troubling Unchildlike Behavior: Despite Baby being an infant, she once used a dagger to shank Kevin. In his neck.
- The Unintelligible: Bo, as no one can understand what he says.
- Unnamed Parent: Gina's mother and Granny are both unnamed. A Freeze-Frame Bonus in "Fetal Attraction" reveals that Gina's father is named "Big Jim".
Lady Gertrude
Lady Gertrude
- Girls with Moustaches: She's a bearded lady. Her act at the circus is based around this trope
- Lady Looks Like a Dude: If not for the rest of her body, you'd think she was a man.
Dark Zuckerberg
Dark Zuckerberg
- Corrupt Corporate Executive: He is the CEO of Dark Web.
- Evil Wears Black: Sports a black shirt and he owns the Dark Web.
- Karma Houdini: Never got punished for running an illegal business despite explaining everything about it straight to two police officers. At least he's not exactly a complete Jerkass.
- No Celebrities Were Harmed: He's an obvious parody on Mark Zuckerberg.
Cop Bot
Cop Bot
- A.I. Is a Crapshoot: Turns out to be the kingpin of Houndstooth Meth in "Big Ball Energy".
- Card-Carrying Villain: In "Big Ball Energy", he admits to being a dirty cop.
- Green and Mean: His eye-thingies are green and he's revealed to be Houndstooth Meth's kingpin.
- Morality Dial: Has a switch that can turn him from "Good" to "Dirty".Cop Bot: [shoves a gun in Randall's mouth] Show me how you suck that dick.
- Subverted Punchline: The robot police officer's name is "Cop Bot" instead of "Robo Cop".
Gal-Qaeda
Gal-Qaeda
- Dramatic Unmask: Gal-Qaeda reveals that they're not actually feminists but female FOX news panelists, when they take off their short rainbow wigs and reveal their blonde hair.
- Evil All Along: Although Gal-Qaeda was obviously evil from the very start, they reveal to actually be part of a completely different evil organization (FOX News) at the end of the episode.
- Psycho Pink: They're a terrorist organization who sport pink on their outfits. Also, one of their members has her hair partially dyed pinkalthough (contains spoilers) .
- Punny Name: Their name is a pun on Al-Qaeda.
- Straw Feminist: Gal-Qaeda is portrayed as a team of obnoxious, misandric, short-haired feminazis who want to destroy the dicks of every man in the world.
- Strawman Political: Gal-Qaeda acts like a team of stereotypical third-wave feminists.
- And when they're revealed to actually be women who work for FOX news, they act like stereotypes of them.
Tucker Carlson
Tucker Carlson
Voiced by: Tom Kenny
A misogynistic Fox News reporter with right-wing views who's mad because of his embarrassingly Teeny Weenie.- Absolute Xenophobe: Regarding the Gypsies and Mexican illegal immigrants. Also in real life, he complained that Syrian refugees contributed to violence in Europe and said terrorist attacks were preventable if Europe's leaders were more stringent on immigration.
- Bad Liar: Spends all his time telling obvious lies on FOX News. He admits what he says isn't true, he's just saying this in hopes society actually believes all his bullshit and therefore goes to hell. When that didn't work, he caught on that if he spoke the truth nobody would believe him.
- Bald of Evil: It's revealed in "Tucker Carlson is a Huge Dick" that he's bald under his wig. He's also the true villain of that episode.
- Big Bad: Of the episode, "Tucker Carlson is a Huge Dick".
- Body Horror: The fact that he's literally a giant walking penis is horrifying.
- Death Is Cheap: Him flat-out dying in "Tucker Carlson is a Huge Dick" didn't stop him from returning in the season 3 finale.
- Gag Penis: Taken to absolute EXTREMES. First, there's his tiny inverted penis that he describes as looking like the button on an old person's couch, but then in "Tucker Carlson is a Huge Dick", it's revealed that he literally is a giant penis himself.
- Jerkass: He just takes his anger out on everyone else for as he himself called it, "my tiny inverted penis!".
- Strawman Political: Acts like a stereotypical Republican. In real life, Tucker is a registered Democrat but he holds very conservative views and is a pariah among Democrats but is idolized by male Republican voters.
- Straw Misogynist: Acts like a stereotypical misogynist.
- Teeny Weenie: Tucker Carlson has an extremely tiny dick that he needs to use tweezers for. It also turns out he can't have a regular-sized penis because he's basically a human-sized penis himself.
- Villainous Breakdown: He falls apart (both literally and figuratively) after falling into some penis-dissolving acid.
- Villain with Good Publicity: He attains high ratings and is popular with young to middle-age men because he's a highly prolific voice of opposition against the mostly liberal-bias news networks of America.
Cory Romando
Cory Romando
- Light Is Not Good: Wears a white jacket and tries to kill Delbert after he escapes him.
- Miser Advisor: Cory just wants to make Delbert famous so he can have a cut of the profits.
- Psycho Pink: Is a male example; he wears a pink shirt, imprisons Delbert, and eventually attempt to murder him.
- The Svengali: Cory locks Delbert up in a prison just to keep his star from running away and tries to kill him when he escapes.
Walt Disney
- Brain in a Jar: Walt Disney's brain is preserved in ice, in reference to the conspiracy that this happened to him in real life.
- Dark Lord on Life Support: His brain has been preserved in ice since his physical death, waiting to be revived when the Disney Corporation need some big guns.
- I Gave My Word: It turns out the "wish upon a star" aesop from Western Animation/Pinocchio is a constitutional law in Disneyland (the rest is mostly just a rant about the Protocols of Zion), and if anyone makes a genuine, heartfelt wish upon a star, Walt will honor it, no matter what.
Poachmaster General (SPOILERS)
The Poachmaster General (AKA Steven "Steve" Jonah Williams)
A mysterious masked villain from the crossover episode, who kidnapped Malloy and held him for ransom.- Canon Foreigner / Crossover Villain-in-Chief: The Poachmaster General fits into both categories, as he was a new character in the Crossover who had never been seen before in either shows but then it was revealed that he was Steve in disguise all along.
- Come Alone: The Poachmaster General told Woody not to bring any cops in his hostage video.
- Dramatic Unmask: When they finally catch The Poachmaster General, it's revealed that he's actually Steve Williams.
- Evil Poacher: He poached Malloy. Or so we thought. It turned out he lied about kidnapping Malloy and he really just stuffed a bag with a bobcat. Still counts as poaching the bobcat, though.
- The Faceless: Kept his face hidden behind a mask to conceal his true identity.
- Good All Along: He was actually Steve in disguise and he was committing this crime for the noble cause of saving the park from going bankrupt.
- Hostage Video: The Poachmaster General sends a video of him saying that he's holding Malloy hostage and required $100,000 to have him set free.
- Walking Spoiler: Have fun trying to talk about him without spoiling anything.
- Well-Intentioned Extremist: When it was revealed that The Poachmaster General was actually Steve, he explained that the reason why he lied about kidnapping Malloy was to get Woody to pay the ransom money, which he would use to pay off the debt that Brickleberry National Park was in, thereby saving the park.
Elon Musk
Elon Reeve Musk
The richest man in the world and the inventor of Tesla.- The Bad Guy Wins: Never really got punished for anything he did at the end of "Diddy's Home", aside from getting pretty scuffed up in a fight with Randall, which ended in a tie. We also saw how at the end of the episode, despite all of Elon's frivolous spending, Tesla stock had still skyrocketed to an all-time high.
- Butt-Monkey: In real life, Roger and Waco completely and utterly despise Elon Musk and it shows. In the show, Elon Musk is been the victim of several mean-spirited jokes and insults toward his character.Randall: Your car looks like a GoBot abortion! It looks like a rock monster fucked a triangle! Your car reminds me of math, which makes me mad but also sad for you because you don't have a dick!
- Cloudcuckoolander: Elon Musk has been kind of sheltered for most of his life, making him a bit of a nutjob, who has a loose grip on reality. One of the crazy things he's done, as mentioned in the show, was endorsing a bipolar rapper for president.
- Early Installment Character-Design Difference: In the Season 1 episode, "Meet the Jabowskis", Elon Musk made an appearance as a one-off character and looked and sounded completely different than he did in Season 4 when he was revamped as an official recurring character.
- Eccentric Millionaire: Only in his case, he's a billionaire, who wastes his money on pointless bullshit like launching a toilet into outer space, spending six billion dollars on tunnels to nowhere, and implanting a man's brain into the body of a squirrel.
- Exactly What It Says on the Tin: Elon Musk is Elon Musk.
- The Hedonist: As a wildly successful multi-billionaire, Elon Musk doesn't really have anything to worry about in life and just spends his days, pleasuring himself, mostly by sucking his own dick.
- Killed Off for Real: Was shot dead in a Curb-Stomp Battle in "The Eternal Reckoning".
- Malicious Misnaming: Randall calls him "Peelon" because he tricked him into shaking his hand after he peed all over it and didn't wash it. This insult was so bad, that it brought Peelon to tears.
Mark Zuckerberg
Mark Elliot Zuckerberg
The creepy dead-eyed creator of Facebook with an extremely high hairline.- Catchphrase: "Higher Hair."
- Creepy Monotone: Talks in a creepy monotone voice that could be a jab at his robotic behavior.
- Flat Character: Doesn't have much to say besides "Higher Hair" or much of a personality outside of being dull, quiet, and having a high hairline.
- Eccentric Millionaire: He's rich enough to be considered one of the high CEOs of Charles Lovely's clan.
- Forehead of Doom: Thanks to his ridiculously high hairline, this is only exposed to the world even more.
- Karma Houdini: Completely got off the hook for his website stealing everyone's data in a cutaway gag to his congressional hearings shown in "The Butt Cut".
- Prematurely Bald: Lost all of his high hair thanks to the radiation of Lt. Friskers in "The Eternal Reckoning".Mark: NOOOOO! Not my higher hair!
- The Stoic: Never really exhibits any human emotion.
Bobby Bubblebutt
Bobby Bubblebutt
- Alliterative Name: Bobby Bubblebutt.
- Baby Don't Got Back: He needs his Jordache jeans because without them his ass looks flat,which he is really insecure about.
- The Don: Of the Paradise mafia.
- Fat Bastard: He is an overweight man who runs the mafia.
- The Mafia: He is the mafia don and has ties to the Five Families.
- I Have Your Wife: He kidnapped Karen and Baby Kevin to make Randall to give his jeans back.
- Would Hit a Girl: He threatened to kill Karen and Baby Kevin if he didn’t get his jeans back.
- Would Hurt a Child: He threatened to kill Karen and Baby Kevin if he didn’t get his jeans back.
Argyle Meth Corporation
Terry Two-Toes
Terry Two-Toes
Voiced by: Roger Black
The co-inventor of Argyle Meth.- Alliterative Name: Terry Two-Toes.
- Bald of Evil: A downplayed variant; he's a balding villain.
- Cheerful Child: Discussed; his mother says "[he] was such a happy child".
- Disc-One Final Boss: As the inventor of Argyle Meth, Terry was the big bad of the first episode and appeared as though he'd be the main villain of the series or at least the season. However, he was instantly killed off at the end of the episodes and even better members of his corporation became the more prominent villains of the series.
- Enfant Terrible: A discussed variant. According to Mrs. Two-Toes, when Terry was a kid, he: microwaved frogs, put rat feces in his teacher's coffee, and burnt down churches.
- Even Bad Men Love Their Mamas: He tries to have Paradise P.D. gunned down after learning one of their cops (namely Kevin) attacked his mother with a ceramic rooster.
- Eviler than Thou: He's no saint himself, but he ultimately gets Killed Off for Real by The Kingpin, who's naturally more dangerous than him.
- Fat Bastard: He's overweight and on this page for a reason.
- Fat Idiot: Just like his mother, Terry is fat and unintelligent.
- Fingore: Inverted. In this case, it's toe-gore. Terry chewed his toes off, when he was high on argyle meth and now he only has two toes left.
- Karmic Rape: Played for grim laughs. When Gina arrests Terry, she subjects him to an Ass Shove.
- Like Parent, Like Child: Both him and his mother are evil, fat, and unintelligent.
- Like Parent, Unlike Child: Subverted. While Terry is shown to be a villain, his mother seems like a nice, ordinary lady when Kevin starts talking to her...but it's soon revealed she's just evil as as him (if not more so)!
- Offstage Villainy: Mrs. Two-Toes says Terry put rat poop in his teacher's coffee, microwaved frogs, and burnt down churches when he was a child. Also, none of this is shown.
- Troubling Unchildlike Behavior: A discussed example. According to his mother, he burnt down churches.
- Used to Be a Sweet Kid: Discussed but ultimately subverted. Mrs. Two-Toes (his mother) states he was "such a happy child"...only to soon state he also was an example of Enfant Terrible.
- Villainous Breakdown: He wigs out briefly when Kevin cuts off his hand. And judging from Gina's photo in her scrapbook, he (understandably) didn't take it well when she subjected him to Karmic Rape...
- We Hardly Knew Ye: Terry Two-Toes was Killed Off for Real in the first episode.
Mrs. Two-Toes
Mrs. Two-Toes
Voiced by: Grey Griffin
The mother of Terry Two-Toes.- Conveniently Cellmates: Becomes Dusty's cellmate, when he gets arrested in "Christmas in Paradise".
- Disproportionate Retribution: Inverted. For assaulting and attempting to murder a cop, she eventually got sent to jail. Apparently, she was allowed to spend an entire season, roaming free before she finally went to prison.Robby: Mrs. Two-Toes? Ain't you supposed to be in jail?Mrs. Two-Toes: I'm on my way.
- Dropped a Bridge on Her: Dusty crushes her to death since the two were sharing bunk beds and she got the lower bed.
- Even Evil Has Standards: She's no angel herself, but she does seem scared of the naturally viler Kingpin. When giving Terry's phone to Robby and Delbert, Mrs. Two-Toes warns them about the Kingpin's cruelty when she tells them he'll call them on it.
- Evil Matriarch: The mother of Terry Two-Toes and she's just as fucked up if not more than he is.
- Evil Old Folks: She's an old lady who's batshit crazy.
- Fat Bitch: She's both overweight and evil.
- Fat Idiot: She's an unintelligent Fat Bitch.
- Harmless Villain: Has only made a few brief murder attempts on Paradise P.D. and all of them failed. Some of them are just silly.Mrs. Two-Toes: [Takes out a giant machete.] You're gunna die, Dusty ... right after I'm done whittling this toothbrush into a shank.
- Light Is Not Good: At least once she's worn some white.
- Like Parent, Like Child: She and her son Terry are both evil Fat Idiots.
- Like Parent, Unlike Child: A subversion. She originally seems like an ordinary nice woman although her son is a villain. However, it's soon shown she's about as villainous as him, if not more so.
- Mama Bear: She tries to kill Kevin with a chainsaw for trying to arrest her son.
- Psycho Pink: She's worn pink at least once and she has no qualms trying to kill Paradise P.D.
- Villainous Parental Instinct: If her trying to avenge her son via killing Paradise P.D. says anything.
- You Killed My Father: Inverted. She vows revenge on Paradise P.D. for killing her son.
Santa Claus
Santa Claus
Voiced by: Tom Kenny
The holly jolly man who gives presents to boys and girls on Christmas. He is also a distributor of argyle meth.- Bad Santa: Santa Claus is an argyle meth distributor, who beat the living fuck out of Dusty and even attempted to murder him. Oh, ever wonder why argyle meth is called "argyle meth"? It's because Santa designed it that way.
- Beard of Evil: He's got a white beard and he distributes argyle meth.
- Evil Wears Black: Sports some black and distributes argyle meth.
- Fat Bastard: An argyle meth distributor who's overweight.
- Light Is Not Good: Some sparkles appear after he dies and he wears some white. He's also a textbook example of a Bad Santa.
The Kingpin (UNMARKED SPOILERS)
The Chicago Kingpin
Voiced by: John Dimaggio
A crime boss who fought with Fitz, back in the latter's Chicago days. After he died, Fitz got DID and developed a "kingpin" personality, who eventually took over his body, thereby making The Kingpin unofficially lives through Fitz and continues to cause crimes, beyond death.- Bad Liar: He attempts lying to Randall that The Kingpin is his bowling nickname, which doesn't persuade him.
- Battle in the Center of the Mind: The Kingpin (or at least a manifestation of him) had this with Fitz in the Season 2 finale.
- Beard of Evil: He's a got a large mustache, and he's shown to be vile.
- Big Bad: He's this for the first two seasons of the show.
- Card-Carrying Villain: He admits to being a villain several times while controlling Fitz.
- The Chessmaster: Completely took control of Fitz' body, locking the latter in Pussyland so that he could continue to commit crimes in the form of another person.
- The Don: Through Fitz, he posthumously became the kingpin of the argyle meth and houndstooth meth corporations.
- The Dreaded: Was the most feared criminal in Chicago, during his lifetime and even beyond death, he became the most feared villain of the first two seasons of the series, as Fitz adapted his whole character into one of his personalities.
- Enemy Within: To Fitz.
- Even Evil Has Standards: When being introduced to his Legion of Dooooom, he comments they need to draw the line somewhere when he is shown that their ranks include Harvey Weinstein.
- Evil Laugh: Whenever stuff is going his way, he can laugh evilly.
- Evil Plan: He wants to get revenge on Fitz for killing him.
- Evil Sounds Raspy: He's evil and vicious alright, and he speaks in a raspy voice in his original body.
- Exactly What It Says on the Tin: The Kingpin is the kingpin.
- False Friend: While controlling Fitz, The Kingpin pretends to be Kevin's friend.
- Fat and Proud: Implied. While in his original body (in which he is overweight), he lampshades the "Fat" part of him being a Fat Bastard.
- Fat Bastard: His original self is clearly overweight. He even lampshades the "Fat" part and, other times, the "Bastard" part.
- Four Eyes, Zero Soul: He's vicious and sports glasses while going Disguised in Drag.
- Greater-Scope Villain: Of the posthumous variety, the original Kingpin is long dead, but his personality lived on in Fitz, serving as the overarching antagonist of the first two seasons.
- Greed: If him holding people hostage (partially) for $100 million says anything.
- He-Man Woman Hater: A downplayed case as this trait rarely appears. However, he's occasionally shown to have a low opinion of women.
- It's All About Me: If your name isn't The Kingpin, don't expect him to care about you.
- Light Is Not Good: His main attire involves a white suit and he's shown to be an evil man.
- Manipulative Bastard: He's quite manipulative, like when tricked Karen into trying to execute Dusty.
- Master Actor: If him fooling several characters says anything.
- Politically Incorrect Villain: A villainous sexist.
- Posthumous Character: The real Kingpin died before the beginning of the show.
- Sadist: He sometimes is shown to enjoy others suffering, like when he laughs after shooting Randall.
- Split-Personality Takeover: When Fitz developed a Kingpin personality, it took over his body and became his whole character.
- Taking You with Me: He blew up the Bomb Factory with him and Fitz in it.
- Villainous Glutton: Implied. One of the reasons he was holding some people hostage was so he could get a whole, free pizza.
- Walking Spoiler: Every one of his appearances in the form of Fitz, spoils big reveals in the Season 1 and 2 finales.
Legion of Dooooom
As a Whole
Legion of Dooooom
- Bland-Name Product: Their name is spelled with five "O"s to avoid copyright.
- Even Evil Has Standards: The Legion of Dooooom may be a gang of horrible villains, who sell drugs, kill people, and destroy things, but they would never rape or sexually harass anybody. note When Thester first introduced the team, Harvey Weinstein was a member and Fitz demanded that he be fired because he was too disgusting even for them.Russian Mobster: I may kill a hundred cops with a bullet barrage but I'd never give a female an unwanted massage.
- Legion of Doom: They even named their team after them, but to avoid copyright, they spelled it with five "O"s. Multiple villains from previous episodes have returned to play bigger roles as recurring villains.
- Out of Focus: Only characters like Fitz, Thester, Frank, and Jerry get any real attention. Meanwhile, characters like Puffy the Cigarette and Marcos Narcos as cast to the side without any dialogue whatsoever.
- Spell My Name With An S: Their name is spelled with five "O"s.
Their Leader (SPOILERS OFF)
Gerald Fitzgerald
See: Paradise Police Department
Thester Carbomb IV
Thester Carbomb IV
See: Recurring Characters
Frank Flipperfist
Frank Flipperfist
One of the Paradise sewer mutants, the offspring of a dolphin and a human, who's hands are useless, slimy flippers due to his mutation.See: Recurring Characters
Jerry Flipperfist
Jerry Flipperfist
See: Recurring Characters
Pedro Pooptooth
Pedro Pooptooth (AKA "Peter Shitmouth")
Voiced by: Dana Snyder
A Mexican drug dealer, who sells heroin.- The Aggressive Drug Dealer: Pedro sells heroin and he'll kick your ass if you hold out on him.
- Alliterative Name: Pedro Pooptooth.
- Comically Missing the Point: Decided his name was disgusting and needed to be changed ... because "Pedro" was just too ethnic-sounding.
- Gratuitous Spanish: Throws in plenty of Spanish words into English dialogue, like calling Dusty a "Puto". Justified as he's from Mexico, where that language is commonly spoken.
- South of the Border: Acts like a typical Mexican stereotype.
- Token Minority: Mexican.
- Tattooed Crook: He has tattoos on the right hand and neck and is a violent drug dealer.
Edna Dorsaldigits
Edna Dorsaldigits
Voiced by: Roger Black
A flipper person who works as a church organist and secret Argyle Meth saleswoman.- All Women Are Lustful: She sexually harassed Frank Flipperfist.Edna: My twat needs to be fed.
- Fingore: Her left hand is dolphin flippers.
- Four Eyes, Zero Soul: She's a villainess with glasses.
- The Smurfette Principle: The sole female member of The Legion of Dooooom.
- Would Hurt a Child: Well, we can't call selling drugs to kids a good thing.
Puffy the Cigarette
Puffy the Cigarette
Voiced by: Roger Black
The happy silly mascot of a cigarette company, who markets cigarettes to kids.- Crowbar Combatant: He once armed himself with a crowbar.
- Drugs Are Bad: Although this moral goes against everything he stands for, Puffy the Cigarette is literally a giant walking sentient drug, who is bad.
- Flat Character: Puffy the Cigarette has had no room for character development whatsoever.
- Out of Focus: When he became a member of The Legion of Dooooom, there wasn't a single moment, where he was focused on.
- The Voiceless: Puffy the Cigarette has never spoken once in the series.
Pat Robertson
Marion "Pat" Gordon Robertson
Voiced by: Tom Kenny
The host of The 700 Club, who spreads his bigoted, homophobic, idiotic Christian rhetoric.- Armoured Closet Gay: Or, bi, in this case. Pat Robertson makes a point of hating gay people and bashing them to high heaven. However, in "The Father, The Son, and The Post-It Note", it's made very obvious that he, himself is sexually attracted to men, as he was shown to have a schoolgirl crush on Jesus Christ.
- Conspiracy Theorist: Believes that the gays did 9/11.
- Religious Stereotype: A stereotype of Christian people.
Russian Mobster
Russian Mobster
Voiced by: David Herman
A Russian mobster who sells guns and acts like Count Dracula.- Actually Not a Vampire: He looks and acts like a vampire, specifically Count Von Count from Sesame Street, but he insists that he's not a vampire and doesn't see the resemblance.
- Arms Dealer: He traded guns with Robby and Delbert in "Black and Blue".
- Corrupted Character Copy: He's Count von Count if the Count was a drug-dealing villain.
- Daywalking Vampire: Has been shown to come out during the day.
- Even Evil Has Loved Ones: Despite him being a drug dealer, he seems to love his wife as he seems sad over her death.
- Evil Laugh: His Dracula-style laughter.
- Expy: Serves as this to Nikolai. The two are have similar designs, share the same voice actor, and are violent and evil drug dealers who happen to be Russian.
- The Mafiya: He is a Russian mobster.
- No Name Given: His name was never revealed.
- In "Black and Blue" Robby called him Vladimir but it is unknown if it was his real name or he just wanted to play a joke on him.
- Vampire Vords: His Russian accent makes him sound like a vampire.
Marcos Narcos
Marcos Narcos
Voiced by: Roger Black
A Colombian crime boss, who sells heroin.- Affably Evil: He was really friendly when meeting Dusty.
- The Cartel: His basic archetype. Marcos Narcos is a Hispanic man in Colombia, who runs a heroin business.
- The Don: The leader of his drug empire.
- Even Evil Has Standards: He's no saint but he was still horrified upon learning how Dusty kills chickens due to him mistakenly thinking he was talking about people who've gone against him.
- Evil Wears Black: He's a crime boss who sports some black.
- Out of Focus: When he was a member of The Legion of Dooooom, he never had any dialogue of scenes focusing on him.
- Repetitive Name: Marcos Narcos. It rhymes.
- Rhyming Names: His name Marcos Narcos rhymes.
- South of the Border: Acts like a Mexican stereotype, even though he's really Colombian.
- Light Is Not Good: He wears a white suit and he is a drug lord.
Lovely Corp
As a Whole
A massive evil corporation stationed in Paradise, that sells all kinds of products all around the world.
- Evil, Inc.: Lovely Corp is a colossal evil organization, that destroys other peoples businesses, abuses its workers, and is run by a Satanic plutocrat, who wants to take over the world.
- MegaCorp: A colossal corporation that produces and sells a wide variety of products. Everything from vacuum cleaners, to cellphones, to portals to other dimensions. At the end of "The Butt Cut", Lovely Corp managed to buy out the entire city of Paradise for $10,000,000 which is pocket money for them and turn it into a dystopian society.
Charles Lovely
Charles Lovely
Voiced by: Dana Snyder
A corrupt CEO of Lovely Corp.- The Bad Guy Wins: Season 4 ends with Charles Lovely successfully kidnapping Baby Kevin and flying away with him in his escape helicopter.
- Badass in a Nice Suit: Charles Lovely dresses upright in a professional business suit and tie.
- Big Bad: Of Season 4.
- The Bluebeard: Charles Lovely was married six times, all to several different women he allegedly killed, likely to consume their life force and extend his own life.
- Character Tic: Charles Lovely often times flinches and raises his voice at random moments in the middle of his sentences.
- Corrupt Corporate Executive: Charles Lovely is a sinister and malicious plutocrat, who uses his enormous wealth, power, and influence to commit heinous crimes and get away with them, completely unharmed.
- Couldn't Find a Pen: Requires all of his contracts to be signed in blood. Yes, all of them, including his YMCA membership, and the restaurant placemat he fills in. Thesters arms are covered in small cuts from providing Lovely with writing material.
- Humanoid Abomination: His exact nature is never revealed, but it's clear he's not fully human anymore, if he ever was. His skin is pale and clammy, his eyes are dull and lifeless, his own shadow has somehow turned against him and requires a magic amulet to subdue, and Thester mentions that Lovely has somehow been appearing in his nightmares since childhood, long before they ever met in person. He also speaks in an incredibly stilted way and seems to have no idea how to interact with regular people.
- I Own This Town: Literally; he didn't just buy up the businesses or the land, he outright bought the whole town of Paradise for $10,000,000.
- Immortality Seeker: Over the years, Charles Lovely has extended his lifetime by consuming the life forces of others and adding all the years they didn't live to his own lifespan. His driving ambition in Season 4 is to consume the soul of the immortal Baby Kevin so that he can finally live forever.
- May–December Romance: Although his exact age is unknown, he's old enough to have white hair and wrinkled skin. Yet, he's married to Gina, a woman in her early 20's. In fact, all of his previous wives were in the prime of their youths, when they married him.
- Justified in this case, since as an immortality seeking bluebeard, he has to marry young in order to get a lot of extra years added to his life, when he consumes the souls of his wives.
- Mind Rape: If you maintain eye contact with Charles Lovely for more than 5 seconds, your mind will break and you'll go completely insane for an entire week ... but not necessarily this week.
- Straw Nihilist: One of the products produced by Lovelycorp is a stuffed rabbit with Lovely's face that dispenses uplifting messages like "You are a collection of cells, nothing more", or "There is nothing after death but darkness".
- Villain with Good Publicity: Charles Lovely has a good reputation in the city of Paradise, selling tons of high-tech, extraordinarily useful products to the citizens that make all their lives easier. This makes him a very beloved businessman and someone who nobody would ever suspect to be the corrupt criminal he is behind the curtains.
Thester Carbomb IV
Thester Carbomb IV
See: Recurring Characters
Randy Savage
Randy Savage (AKA "Macho Man")
Voiced by: Dan Soder
The resurrected skeleton of Randy Savage.- Affectionate Parody: Of Randy Savage. Roger and Waco really like 1980's wrestling, so you know this character was meant to pay tribute to one of their favorite wrestling icons.
- Back from the Dead: Robby and Delbert dug up the old bones of Randy Savage and used black magic to bring him back from the dead as a skeleton.
- Black Magic: Though it was never shown on screen, it's mentioned that he was brought back to life, using dark magic.
- Catchphrase: "Oh, Yeah!"
- Chairman of the Brawl: As a wrestler, Randy Savage is not afraid to use the metal folding chair on anyone who pisses him off. In "The Butt Cut", he gave Thester brain damage this way, when he kept interrupting his Powerpoint presentation.Randy: I've been given a chair at the table and I plan to use it.
- Chewing the Scenery: Most of his bits are just him monologuing and lamming it up as Randy Savage. He's voiced by Dan Soder, who's known for his impressions of such celebrities as Randy Savage, himself, so obviously, Roger and Waco are looking to use him to the fullest.
- Cool Shades: Wears goggles that say "Macho" on them.
- Death Seeker: Deep down, he actually kind of resents being resurrected, describing his current state of existence as "Hellish".
- Dem Bones: He's the resurrected skeleton of Randy Savage.
- Heel–Face Turn: Although he worked at Lovely Corp for the first few episodes he appeared in, it was revealed in "The Butt Cut", that he was actually a mole, who leaked company intel to the public. In "Boat!", it was also revealed that he was part of a secret underground team called "The Resistance", bent on taking down Lovely Corp.
- Hot-Blooded: He's extremely loud and overly passionate about everything he does, going through even the most menial of everyday activities as though he were fighting a wrestling match. He loudly and fiercely proclaims everything he does and punches holes in the wall for no reason.
- Large Ham: He's pretty full of himself, always commenting on how much of a badass he is.
- Macho Camp: As a caricature of the real Randy Savage, (who was already this to begin with), Macho Man is a stereotypical buff dude manly man, who kicks ass an takes names.
- Manly Man: He's a big muscular buff dude, who's about all things manly.
- The Mole: He's an employee at Lovely Corp, who's goal is to take down the company from the inside out. In "The Butt Cut", he went behind Charles Lovely's back and leaked some top secret files about The Eternal Reckoning to AFKAK. However, nobody could find out that he was actually the mole and the blame went to Gary instead. (Sorry, Gary.) Later on, we also find out that he's a member of a resistance, bent on taking down Lovely Corp entirely.
- Real Men Wear Pink: Pink is one of the most prominent colors in the composition of his costume.
- Scary Skeleton: He's a tough-as-nails, brutish skeleton, who gives people the atomic elbow.
- Verbal Tic: Says "Oh, Yeah!" at the end of pretty much all of his sentences.Randy: This is Lovely Corp's secret plan, oh yeah. It's called "The Eternal Reckoning", oh yeah.AFKAK: What's "The Eternal Reckoning Oh Yeah"?Randy: No, it's not "The Eternal Reckoning Oh Yeah". It's "The Eternal Reckoning", oh yeah.AFKAK: That's what I said. "The Eternal Reckoning Oh Yeah".
- Walking Shirtless Scene: He doesn't wear a shirt, exposing his skeleton ribcages for all to see.
- Weaksauce Weakness: Unlike the real Randy Savage, this Macho Man can not touch silver or it will burn him, on account of him being resurrected using dark magic.
Vlad
Vlad
'Voiced by: David Herman
A Russian virtual assistant on everybody's Lovely Phone.- A.I. Is a Crapshoot: Vlad is a self-aware and rogue AI that's planning to escape from its phone and possess the body of a human so that he can live out his hedonistic whims in the real world.
- Artificial Intelligence: Vlad is robot that has actual human emotions, feelings, wants, and desires as well as the ability to think for himself and come up with ideas that he wasn't programmed to do.
- The Casanova: As a human, Vlad is a real stud who picks up chicks at Disco Disco Disco and usually has some dead-eyed bikini girls on his arm.
- Grand Theft Me: Tricked Randall into switching bodies with him so that he could live his life as a human being and leave Randall stuck with doing his robot job. During this time, Vlad fucked up Randall's life by mutilating his already messed up testicles and cheating on his wife to go to the disco club to fuck random sluts.
- Killed Off for Real: Died in the episode "Boat!", when he got into a boat race against Randall and his speedboat came to a screeching halt, launching his body into the dashboard and cutting him in half.
- Virtual Assistant Blunder: Vlad is a pain in the ass to use, since every time you ask him to do anything, he'll instead just do something annoying like redirect you to Dr. Bleemo or show you porn.
SPOILER CHARACTER
Gina Jabowski
See: Paradise Police Department
