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aka: Far Lands Or Bust

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"Hello, ladies and gentlemen! My name is Kurt, and welcome back to Far Lands or Bust!"
Kurt, at the beginning of every episode

Kurtjmac started off doing a typical Let's Play of Minecraft. Then, in episode 11 he decided to head off to the Far Lands, a point where the game, when far enough from the spawn point, completely bugs out. The series, Far Lands or Bust, is currently being done to raise money for the Child's Play charity. He's also a member of Mindcrack and does some of the best known Let's Plays of Kerbal Space Programnote .

Tropes that apply to Kurtjmac:

  • Animals Hate Him: Has been killed by wolves in Ultra Hardcore Seasons 4b, 5, 6, and 7. And in 5 and 6, his own wolf killed him.
  • Angrish: Occasionally. For example, in Driver San Francisco, when trying (and failing) to unlock the Shelby GT-500, he says something that sounds about like "Gah-geck-herp-flerp-der".
  • Asbestos-Free Cereal: According to the channel banner, the channel is Gluten free.
  • Ascended Meme: There's a Minecraft mod that adds Kurt into your world. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iDdtFwzUQ_Y
  • Artifact of Doom: Kurt picks up a Golden Record and it leads to Wolfie's disappearance. When he encounters another in a dungeon, he immediately seals the place up and leaves, declaring the entire area to be cursed.
  • Attention Deficit... Ooh, Shiny!: Kurt is often sidetracked from his speaking by something that happens in the game. Usually due to mobs or terrain.
  • Beyond the Impossible:
    • Walking to the Far Lands, without mods or assistance. Which, at his current rate for those of you who are unfamiliar with just how far away the Far Lands are, will take him until August of 2036. As of 6th March 2021 (the 10-year anniversary of him starting out), he is 4,856,980 blocks from spawn, or just under 39% of the way there.
    • In Mindcrack Ultra Hardcore Season 5, Kurt somehow dies of fall damage. At full health. In a boat, which would negate fall damage anyway. The probable cause is that his three dogs teleported into him.
  • Book Ends: Kurt starts Tomb Raider: Underworld in the Treasure Hunt mode, & ends the game by replaying the First Level in said mode.
  • Bold Explorer: In his "Far Lands or Bust!" series.
  • Bottomless Pits: The Dark and Magical Pit of Bottomless Destiny appears to be this, but actually has a bottom. It's still very deep though.
  • Butt-Monkey: Often in the Ultra Hardcore series where Kurt's been on the receiving end of some nasty glitches.
  • Canine Companion:
    • To the extreme with his pet dog Wolfie. He picked him up Episode 32 and has trailed Kurt ever since. Kurt is very protective of Wolfie and goes to great lengths to keep him in good health. The greatest length Kurt went to was at the start of Episode 179 and Season 4 as he invoked a Temporal Paradox to save Wolfie who had vanished in the livestream to end Season 3. Also in Season 3 of Ultra Hardcore Kurt's dog Ace kills Pause for him, saving Kurt's life and taking out one of the best opponents he had to face. Kurt then gets two more dogs after Ace's death, but they can't save him.
    • Ironically subverted completely several times outside FLOB. Kurt's original pack of five wolves annoyed him greatly, and when they were left behind accidentally as he crossed an ocean, Kurt was relieved, calling it a 'mutual parting of ways'. In Season 4b of Ultra Hardcore Kurt was killed by Guude's wolves. In Season 5 of Ultra Hardcore, Kurt gets a collection of dogs that end up killing him by glitching into his boat as he was teleporting. Season 6 was similar with Kurt going to great lengths to get a single wolf, who ends up killing him by pushing him off a skybridge. And finally in Season 7 Kurt's pack of wolves manage to get Nebris down to a single heart but Kurt confuses Nebris' wolves for his, leading to his death.
  • Catchphrase: Several. "You are dead, sir!"; "INDEED!"; multiple variations on "[Verb] such things as these!"; "Suck it!"
  • Celebrity Endorsement: Notch himself has acknowledged FLOB. Cue a substantial increase in donations in less than 24 hours.
  • Chekhov's Skill: Kurt learns how to perform a glitch he calls the "Hidey Hole Paradox" in FLOB Episode 36, which allows him to reload a backup of his save without undoing any changes he makes to the world. Much later, in episode 179, he uses this glitch to undo Wolfie's glitch-death.
  • Combat Pragmatist: Not above shooting fleeing enemies in the back if that's what it takes.
  • Cozy Voice for Catastrophes
  • Diabolus ex Machina: In Season 8 of Ultra Hardcore, just when he's about to ambush and kill Etho, his internet crashes. By the time he's logged back in, Etho is waiting and kills him.
  • Deadpan Snarker : The yellow text that shows up in early episodes of Far Lands or Bust is a prime example.
    • Kurt himself gets very snarky when he plays Amnesia and doesn't feel it's up to snuff.
    Kurt: [picks up a book] Twilight? NOOOOOOO! [[dumps it into a water drain]]
  • Dogs Are Dumb: This trope is used in full force.
    • The Wolf Pack. A group of five wolves that Kurt took as his first pets, who repeatedly whined and demanded food and injured themselves via fall damage. Vanished when they did not spawn after Kurt crossed a vast ocean.
    • Wolfie. Kurt's faithful pet for near 400 episodes, he is known for being an idiot. Most commonly Wolfie will fall off cliffs, and skirting past lava. He also glitches into boats and blocks.
    • UHC 3 dogs. They often refused to spawn after Kurt and got glitched on pieces of land.
    • UHC 5 dogs. Glitch killed Kurt by teleportating into his boat, ending his season.
    • UHC 7 dogs. The last survivor doesn't follow Nebris into the water when it could have killed him, effectively giving the season win to Team UK. Instead it stayed on the beach and JustD3fy killed it, and was able to win UHC 7.
    • Possibly the only subversion was UHC 6 where the dog knows Kurt is desperate to own a dog and demands many bones to be tamed. He then pushes Kurt off a skybridge Zisteau made after Kurt killed Zisteau.
  • Every Episode Ending: Kurt digs into the Hidey Hole, plants the bed, reminds the viewers to donate to Child's Play charity, promises he will see them next time, and gets in bed fading to black with snoring and a water drop at the end.
  • Failed a Spot Check: Late in his "Stranded! in Minecraft 1.8" playthrough, Kurt gets surprised by a zombie while making torches and drops all of his coal. After killing the intruder, he then panics again when he realizes he dropped it several blocks down and starts looking for it, completely missing the coal seam in the cavern wall nearby. The climax of the scene shows him looking down into the darkness, saying "I don't see any coal..." while he's standing right next to the seam.
  • Fake Kill Scare:
    • The entirety of Episode 120 for Wolfie. The episode, titled "Left Behind" and featuring what appeared to be a grave marker in the episode icon, has Kurt nearly dying as he falls into a deep pit partway through, with Wolfie barely avoiding the same fate. The yellow text warns that it won't be the last scare of the episode. Later on, he leaves Wolfie sitting down after feeding him and doesn't notice until night has fallen. Kurt then braves his way through the dark to get back to Wolfie. For bonus points, Kurt posted a Far Lands or Bust Flashback episode showing his first meeting with Wolfie right before posting Episode 120.
    Kurt: ...I almost called this episode " Losing Wolfie" to match with the FLoB Flashback.
    Yellow Text: You monster!
    • As well, in Episode 122, Wolfie almost kills himself running into a cactus. As Kurt searches for food, he sees a wild wolf dive off a cliff and kill itself. Kurt thinks Wolfie is dead before finding his companion alive.
    • 101 Episodes later for the 2-Year Anniversary Special Episode 223 Wolfie glitches into a block upon finding the double waterfall in the episode, and comes the closest to death since Episode 122. Kurt saves him just in time.
  • Flat "What": Fond of these when confused, as best seen in episode 36, appropriately titled WAT.
  • Freudian Slip: During the F1 2012 Co-Op series with VintageBeef, we got this gem:
    Kurt: *after turning a corner at full speed* Wow, I went into that turn really hot!
    Beef: *mumbling* You're really hot....
    Kurt: I beg your pardon?
    Beef: Erm....
  • Friend-or-Idol Decision: Has to choose between going back for Wolfie and losing 4-5 hours of progress, as well as potentially losing The Diamond Sword of Spawn-Pointyness, or continuing on without him. It takes him less than a second to choose Wolfie.
  • Friendly Sniper: Plays this to the hilt when he snipes Zisteau in the Ultra Hardcore Season 6 finale.
  • Fun with Subtitles: As mentioned above, the snarky yellow text.
  • Gilligan Cut: In season 7 of UHC: "I'm kind of anti-dog this season..." lampshaded in the finale, when he has ten wolves following him.
  • Gosh Dangit To Heck:
    • Most often when Wolfie breaks his boats or knocks him off a cliff:
    Kurt: God Bless America, Wolfie!
    • Averted when he dug out unsupported sand, while he was standing on it. The reaction was repeated "OH SHIT!", and this scene is the subject of one FLOB Flashback
    • In his Let's Play of Driver: San Francisco, he'll do this when narrowing avoiding disastrous crashes or trying to lose to cops.
    Kurt: Oh...sugar!
    • Played straight during his fight with Guude in Ultra Hardcore Season 3.
    Kurt: Crumbs!
    Kurt: Oh, Christmas!
    • Also inverted during the same fight by Kurt and the on-screen text
    Kurt: Crap. Crap. Crap. Crap. Crap. Crap. Crap.
    • During his DIRT 3 Let's Play, Kurt notes that he's running out of euphemisms and must invent new ones.
    • Averted in his DiRT Rally series, in which he actually says words like 'shit and 'fuck'. The instances of the f-words are usually censored with a honking horn (presumably for comedic purposes), but the instances of 'shit' and related words are unedited.
  • Halloween Episode: Done twice in Episodes 91 and 186 by collecting Pumpkins and leaving Jack O'lanterns outside the Hidey Holes.
  • Heroic BSoD: When Wolfie disappears during the livestream, Kurt is stunned speechless and unable to move on. Fortunately, he soon recovers with the help of his friends.
  • Idiot Ball: Kurt was holding it for a while during Season 6 of Ultra Hardcore. He forgot that you can get string from cobwebs.
  • In Memoriam: His Wink at the Moon, a Kerbal Space Program video, is dedicated to Neil Armstrong. In it, Kurt sends a rocket to the Mun without any of his usual commentary and instead has wistful music playing. The video ends with the quotation, "...the next time you walk outside on a clear night and see the moon smiling down at you, think of Neil Armstrong and give him a wink."
  • Innocuously Important Episode: Episode 32 where Kurt tames Wolfie. Everybody expected Wolfie to die or get lost similar to the previous Wolf Pack Kurt had, but Wolfie is still alive nearly 400 episodes later.
  • Invincible Hero:
    • In the 630+ FLOB episodes, Kurt's never died. The closest he got was getting down to half a heart trying to save Wolfie.
    • He also survived the whole of Ultra Hardcore Season 9 without losing a single heart of health.
  • It May Help You on Your Quest: In Episode 39 of Far Lands or Bust, Kurt fills a bucket with lava and takes it with him on his journey in the belief that it he may eventually need it, despite knowing how dangerous it can be. Over 100 episodes and almost exactly one year later in Episode 161, he finally makes use of the lava bucket to kill a pack of Creepers so he can investigate a grass-filled cavern.
  • It's the Journey That Counts: His motivation for walking the old-fashioned way and documenting every step in "Far Lands or Bust!" He mentions that he could easily get to the Far Lands using cheats, but he wouldn't have the pride of accomplishment from doing so and would also miss out on a lot of interesting sights. He's also made this even better by turning his journey into fundraiser for Child's Play charity.
  • Let's Play: Aside from Far Lands or Bust and the other Minecraft worlds he does videos of, Kurt has also made Let's Plays of a few other series, such as Tomb Raider: Anniversary, GRID, and Kerbal Space Program.
  • Live Episode
    • The "8-hour 20-minute Livestream for Child's Play Charity", which was an official continuation of Far Lands or Bust.
    The five-hour 50% livestream also ends in a live episode of Far Lands or Bust, with Kurt forgoing notes and taking questions selected by Brian directly from the livestream chat.
    • In a similar vein, several episodes in 2016 were recorded live on Twitch during "Far Lands or Bust Friday" streams.
    • This now applies to most episodes technically, as Kurt records episodes in an hour or so long session during Twitch streams, temporarily disabling his camera and all his donation and follow notifications to bring it in line with the standard setup of recorded videos.
  • Loyal Animal Companion:
    • Wolfie, his trusty companion in FLOB.
    • Averted with the dog he gets in Season 6 of Mindcrack Ultra Hardcore. It takes 8 bones to tame and ends up pushing Kurt to his death.
    • In real life, Kurt had a pet turtle named Speedy. The two of them were together since (Kurt's) childhood, but Speedy recently passed. However, Kurt now has a dog named Eva.
  • Mad Libs Catchphrase: His default catch-phrasey thing when sleeping in FLoB is "[snoring] ...Aaaaand awakeness!", but "awake" is often replaced with whatever he was just talking about, i.e. "Old Toyotasness," "Netflixness," etc.
  • Male Gaze: He seems rather uncomfortable with how often the camera defaults to this while playing Tomb Raider: Underworld.
  • Mass "Oh, Crap!": When Wolfie disappears in the FLoB-athon.
  • Milestone Celebration: Several of them. Episode 50 and the search to make the Golden Clock of Destiny. Episode 100 seeing the world through 3D glasses. Episode 200 with Kurt going to the Nether to retrieve Glowstone, and Episode 211 where the spawn cabin is rebuilt on 200 episodes of walking. Episode 223 was the two-year anniversary special and Kurt talked about how the series changed his life.
  • No More for Me: In the middle of Episode 36, he mentions that he's having a snifter of bourbon while playing, as a tribute to "National Bourbon Day". At the end of the episode, he discovers the "Hidey Hole Paradox" for the first time, which prompts him to set the bourbon aside.
  • Precision F-Strike:
    • When he meets his end in Season 5 of Minecraft Ultra Hardcore, through a glitch leading to fall damage while in a boat.
    Kurt: What...? What...? What...! Motherfuc- *TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES PLEASE STAND BY*
    • In episode 21 of Minecraft Cast Away, upon discovering the stronghold.
    Kurt: What? What? What? You've gotta be shitting me.
  • Putting the Band Back Together: Reunites the K.G.B.S twice after the initial disbanding - once for One Last Job for a charity exhibition match, and then to take on Spellbound Caves.
  • Rage Quit: Kurt attempted to play through pid. It slowly devolved into swearing, and he gave up at the second boss.
  • Recap Episode:
    • Is done occasionally to get new subscribers up to speed on the series, but done through Kurt's narration rather than clips.
    • He has recently uploaded a few FLoB Flashbacks, which are short clips of memorable moments (such as discovering the Canyon of Whoa)
  • Red Oni, Blue Oni: The blue to Beef's red in their co-op F1 series. Kurt's nearly always cool, collected, and in control of his car.
    • More or less inverted in his new F1 co-op series with Cone Dodger. There have been instances where an inverted trope isn't the case, but more often than not, Cone is the more calm and collected of the two.
  • Running Gag: Any time a game comes up with something vaguely philosophical (or patent nonsense meant to sound deep), Kurt will usually add "Eidolons, eidolons" to the end of it. Twitch chat often does this too.
  • Snarky Inanimate Object: The Snarky Yellow Text, the third of the three characters in Far Lands or Bust. While sometimes pointing things out, it's known for its extremely snarky comments on Kurt's commentary.
  • The Stinger: There's one on his Kerbal Space Program video "Kerbinside" in celebration of putting his astronauts in orbit around the Mun. It's also an Homage to Apollo 8.
    • A random phrase—usually non-sequitur without context—from the episode is repeated right at the end of most Far Lands or Bust episodes.
    • Kurt's recent Twitch livestreams ended with footage (or just the music) from the extremely bizarre game Car on a Stick. For a moment it looked like FLoBathon 2017 was going to skip it... until right at the very very end. Twitch Chat was pleased.
  • Technician Versus Performer: Technician to VintageBeef's performer in their co-op F1 series. While Beef has managed to turn better or equal lap times to Kurt, Kurt will often be less than a second slower and do it lap after lap after lap, improving over the course of the race. Combined with his better grasp of race strategy, he tends to place better than Beef when he has even a mediocre race. It is the combination of both styles that really makes the entertainment value of the series.
  • Temporal Paradox:
    • The Wolfie clone and pre-made Hidey Hole in Episode 36. In the following episode, Kurt reveals that this occurred due to a glitch in Minecraft where he had scrapped his first take of the episode and reloaded a previous save, but Minecraft kept the changes to the world he had made in the original take.
    • In the FLoB-athon, Wolfie disappeared upon running into the same block as Kurt when he logged off. After finishing the marathon anyway, Kurt proceeds to cook up an idea to save Wolfie by invoking the above paradox. Kurt reverts to a previous back up of the save to find Wolfie and then walks back in the terrain he previously altered so it does not erase the marathon progress. Kurt then walks back with Wolfie and still has his faithful companion.
  • Tempting Fate: During his "Mission to the Sun" episode for his Kerbal Space Program series, Kurt notices a design flaw in his rocket, but dismisses it with an "I think we should be OK." Less than a minute later, that same flaw turns his rocket into a massive fireball.
  • Three-Dimensional Episode: The 100th Episode of Far Lands or Bust is this.
  • Timey-Wimey Ball: In the Hidey Hole Paradox, even though Kurt is sent to where he was in the past, any changes he made to the world before he was sent back remain. This allows him to save Wolfie.
  • Title Drop: Most of the video titles from Kurt's multi-video series are taken from lines he says in the video.
  • True Companions: Kurt is close friends with several members of the Mindcrack team.
  • Villain Decay: Although Kurt's arch-nemesies in Season 1, Skeletons have decayed in fear value to the point of uselessness. Creepers have only completely replaced them as Kurt's major article.
  • We Are Experiencing Technical Difficulties: Played straight in UHC 5 where Kurt gets killed through a glitch and cuts to a technical difficulties screen.
  • Weird Moon: A few episodes have featured Kurt discussing the oddities of Minecraft's moon, and his attempts to figure out how it could potentially work like it does.
  • Verbal Tic:
    • "... INDEED.", "...ness", "Ah!", and "Gigigi!"
    • More recently: "INDEED, WHATNOT, and ETC!"

I will see you... next time!

Alternative Title(s): Far Lands Or Bust

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