Quotes / Pre-Asskicking One-Liner

"We are on Eastern Pain Time, and it is Dan O'Clock."

"I'm Tristan Taylor, and for the next five minutes, you guys are officially my bitches!"
Tristan Taylor, Yugioh The Abridged Series

"That's my bread and butter you're fucking with."
Charles Foster Ofdensen, Metalocalypse

Iroh: Did I ever tell you how I got the nickname "The Dragon of the West"?.
Azula: I'm not interested in a lengthy anecdote, Uncle.
Iroh: It's more of a demonstration, really.

Tenzin: I will never let you get to Korra.
Zaheer: Unfortunately, you don't have a choice.
Tenzin: Yes, I do. (effortlessly airbends Zaheer, Ming-Hua and Ghazan away in one move)

"Fuck subtle."
Harry Dresden, The Dresden Files

Abomination: What are you going to do about it, Dr. Banner?
The Hulk: The doctor is out.

For that which you are about to receive, I am truly thankful.
Sergeant Schlock, Schlock Mercenary

Dalek: Records indicate you will show mercy. You are an associate of the Doctor's.
River:I'm River Song. Check your records again.

"Oy, Russell! Somebody gonna get a hurt real bad."
Russell Peters, quoting his father

Exdeath: So, you offer your life in exchange for theirs?
Kain Highwind: Of course not. I offer yours.

"Peace? Peace. I hate the word, as I hate hell, all Montagues, and thee."

"Be honest. You've been looking forward to this, haven't you?"
Darquesse, Skulduggery Pleasant

"Peace talks have broken down. Now we do it our way."
Agent Washington, Red vs. Blue

"It's time for you to die again."
Lord Death, Soul Eater

Achievement Unlocked: "Heads Will Roll"
Asura's Wrath, Episode Twelve, right as Asura gets pissed.

"ONE-LIIIINNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRR!"
Salvador, Borderlands 2

"For Soap."
Captain Price, "Ashes To Ashes", Modern Warfare 3

Mercenary Pilot: Lieutenant Sykes cease your approach, we will open fire!
Gavin: Your boss killed my Captain and enslaved my people. He will be brought to justice.
—-Moments before the Lieutenant single-handedly wins a 6 on 1 dogfight, Star Wars Episode 1: Battle for Naboo.

Stan: Hey Chocodile, watch where you're going!
Chocodile: (Turns with a smirk) Oh HELL no.
Before Chocodile and Stan fight, American Dad!

Thug: Don't you see I have a cannon? One move from my hand, and you are obliterated!
Luke: Make the move.

Gokai Red (Captain Marvelous): Let's make this showy.

Jotaro: (to High Priestess) I, Kujo Jotaro, will pulpsonally....
(Beat)
Jotaro: I messed it up.
Kakyoin: Jotaro, what are you doing?
Jotaro: One more chance, please!
Kakyoin: Please hurry up!
Jotaro: (to High Priestess) I, Kujo Jotaro, will personally beat you to a pulp!

Valerian: Be careful Kerrigan, my father will have made every precaution to ensure no one reaches Commander Raynor.
Kerrigan: He's not prepared for me.

"I'm going to break you. [...] Like a Kit-Kat bar"
Goku to Frieza, Dragon Ball Z Abridged

"Time to dive into the fireworks"

Agent Powers: Sorry, but you've got a flight to catch.
Stan's Watch: anomaly in progress
Stan: Oh yeah? So do you.
Gravity Falls, Not What He Seems

Skitter: You were right, Armsmaster.
Armsmaster: Of course.
Skitter: This was over from the moment we stepped into the room.
Worm

"I have no idea how the fuck Iím going to do it, but Iím going to make you regret that."
Skitter to Mannequin, Worm

"Get out of my house."

"Daddy's home, you pricks!"
Michael DeSanta, Grand Theft Auto V

(hits hi-hat) Oh, what's that? A bell? Time for school.

"You know... she said evil didn't look like anything, or that it looked like a lot of things... But I think it looks like you."
Shadowchild, Digger

"it's a beautiful day outside. birds are singing, flowers are blooming... on days like these, kids like you... Should be burning in hell "
Sans at the end of the Genocide route, Undertale

Ajax: You can grow back body parts now, Wade. But when I'm done with you, body parts are gonna have to grow back you.
Deadpool: Good one. (turns to the camera) Yup, that was a good one.

"Oh, I'm so sorry. I'm afraid this way doesn't lead to Venom. This way only leads...to your annihilation!
The Attack Carrier pilot, Star Fox Zero
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Quotes/PreAsskickingOneliner