The Goonies is one of those ubiquitous films of The Eighties fans hold fond memories of, even today.A small group of kids living on the "Goon Docks" of Astoria, Oregon are in dire straits as a local country club threatens their families' homes with foreclosure. On one of their last days in the neighborhood, one of the "goonies", Mikey, discovers a Treasure Map in his attic. The map allegedly reveals where to find the treasure of infamous pirate One-Eyed Willie — and it appears to lead underneath Astoria. The Goonies, faced with possible homelessness, decide to save their neighborhood by going after the treasure — but to get it, they must outwit a trio of mobsters and survive numerous death traps designed to keep One-Eyed Willie's treasure safe from outsiders.The Goonies was the brainchild of three well-known directors: Steven Spielberg (executive producer/story), Chris Columbus (screenplay note Though, at the time of this film, he wasn't quite famous yet... nor was he even a director. He made his debut in the director's chair two years later with Adventures in Babysitting), and Richard Donner (director).This film also had two successful video games based on it.
This film provides examples of:
Accidental Kiss: Andy accidentally kissed Mikey instead of Brand when they're under the wishing well. She doesn't know until the end, when she asks Brand where his braces went.
Andy: Brand, what happened to your braces?
Brand: I don't wear braces, Mikey wears...*realizes what she's saying*...Mikey! That little...
Andy: Ssshhh...*kisses him again*
Adults Are Useless: When Mikey's mom sees Brand all tied up, instead of freeing him she asks why he can't exercise like a normal kid.
Artistic License - Geography: The Oregon coast seen in the movie is either on the Washington side of the Columbia River or some two dozen miles to the south. Neither is likely to be accessible to a gang of teens and pre-teens on bicycles.
Putting the final scene on the river keeps it within bicycle range, but then Washington would show up on the other side of what would clearly be a River, rather than the ocean.
Asian and Nerdy: Data, but it didn't make him any less of a badass when it came to facing danger.
Avoid the Dreaded G Rating: The word shit comes up several times. As do references to drugs like cocaine and heroin, and "sexual torture devices".
Bat Scare: When Brand removes a rock blocking further passage into the tunnel leading to One-Eyed Willy's hideout, he calls out to see if anybody's there, and a swarm of bats come flying out of the hole, scaring the Goonies.
Berserk Button: First when Mouth tells Chunk he has naked pictures of his mom taking a bath, real cheap, forcing Chunk to break the door open. Second, averted, when Chunk accidentally breaks the water cooler he was drinking from when Mouth thought of putting chocolate on the floor so he can eat through. "Okay Mouth, that's all I can stand and I can't stand no more!"
Sloth has quite an appetite as well, which is how he and Chunk first bond.
When the Goonies hear Sloth growling, Stef thought it was his Growling Gut.
Bigger Bad: Could be applied to One-Eyed Willy as, having been dead for around 350 years, he plays no direct role in the plot and all that is seen of him is his mortal remains. However the heroes must battle through his traps to reach his treasure and Mikey certainly views their quest as a personal duel between himself and Willy. Also, in his time, Willy was a far greater Big Bad than the Fratellis (he did kill all of his men) and Ma Fratelli seems to regard his corpse with a certain mutual criminal reverence.
Mikey: Come on One-Eyed Willy, what does this have to do with the map? Is this just another one of your tricks?
Mikey: We've got you now One-Eyed Willy, we're coming up right behind you!
Mikey: I made it, I beat you
Ma Fratelli: Thank you Mr Willy, thank you. You've made my day
Bowdlerize: Obviously, all instances of the kids swearing is cut when this film airs on television, however it's worth noting, when ABC Family airs this movie, most of Andy's panty shots are cut from the film. In one shot, her minishirt is even digitally painted to cover up her panties!
Breaking the Bonds: Sloth pulls his chains right out of the wall to retrieve Chunk's Baby Ruth candybar.
Buffy Speak: Mikey (and sometimes his friends) keeps referring to the treasure as One-Eyed Willy's "rich stuff".
Sloth's watching of an Errol Flynn film earlier in the film comes in handy at the climax.
Andy's piano lessons when she was four.
Mouth's fluency in Spanish.
Childhood Brain Damage: It's implied that Sloth's deformity was caused by being dropped as a baby. When Ma Fratelli tries to calm him down by singing "Rock-a-bye Baby", Sloth reacts to the line "the cradle will fall" as if it has unearthed Repressed Memories, precipitating his Heel-Face Turn.
Ma Fratelli: I only dropped you once! Okay, maybe twice!
The Complainer Is Always Wrong: Chunk bitches the most about everything that takes place, and is chewed out by every other person in the movie for it.
This being an 80s movie, pretty much all of the kids had a silver tongue at some point, from Chunk to Data.
Hell, Mama Fratelli gets in on this as well:
Mouth: (pointing at the cup of reddish liquid) It's supposed to be water?
Fratelli: It's wet, ain't it? Drink it!
And later, when the Fratellis find the body of Chester Copperpot.
Jake:(checking the wallet) Looks like they picked him clean, Ma.
Mother Fratelli: Sure, right before they ate him.
Dropped Glasses: Stef drops her glasses and Mikey accidentally steps on them.
Durable Death Trap: All those booby traps set by Willie so many years ago still seem to work just fine.
DVD Commentary: All of the Goonies reunited many years later for the commentary, alongside Richard Donner. Unfortunately because the commentary recording session started late, Sean Astin had to leave in the middle to attend a function for co-star Joe Pantoliano.
Funny Foreground Event: Brand standing with the others in the attic talking about One-Eyed Willy, and he's apparently more interested in trying to catch a fly or something. During the commentary, Josh Brolin admits he has no idea what he's doing in that scene.
Mike and One-Eyed Willie both have a fondness for Rube Goldberg devices (some are remarkably similar; Mikey's starts with a bowling ball and Willie's starts with a cannonball). Also, Mikey and Willie both have disabilities, Mikey with his asthma and Willie's one eye. To make it even more obvious, the Novelization says that Willie had asthma, too.
Chunk discovers that Sloth also has a love for sweet things, especially chocolate.
Oh Crap: The Fratellis' reaction when Sloth reveals his Superman shirt.
Chunk's reaction when he sees the ORV with bullet holes parked in the garage of the old restaurant. The same ORV he saw being chased by the police earlier in the film.
Oil Slick: Data's "Slick Shoes" invention is essentially the vehicular version in a shoe-sized package. He successfully applies it to a mast that crosses a river while being chased by the villains.
One-Liner: When Andy worries that Chunk might be dead, Mike retorts with, "Goonies never say die!" and continues his Rousing Speech.
The Other Rainforest: Set and filmed in Astoria, Oregon. How a Spanish Main-era pirate got there is anyone's guess
Panty Shot: Andy in several scenes. Most notably where she falls off the ship's plank into the lagoon.
Pet the Dog: Mikey gives Sloth his food, but runs away after seeing his face.
Pipe Maze: They run into one of these underground. Banging on the pipes to make noise ends up causing chaos for the country club above them. Sloth causes even more trouble when he pushes a pipe upwards, apparently leading to a traffic accident above.
Pretty Little Headshots: The corpse in the freezer was shot in the head, yet the bullethole is so tiny and clean that it looks more like the Fratellis whacked him by putting a cigarette out on his forehead. No exit wound, either.
Product Placement: Chunk is all over the product placement, famously befriending Sloth with a Baby Ruth candy bar. Pepsi makes several label-out appearances, also Domino's Pizza, and others. The Jeep Cherokee comes out looking real good too.
Mikey reads MAD, which was and is co-owned with Warner Bros.. They did a parody anyway.
Mikey: Chester Copperpot! Don't you guys see? Don't you realize? He was a pro and he never made it this far! Look how far we've come. We've got a chance!
Running Gag: A character will mispronounce something, another character will supply the correct word and the first character will claim that's what they said.
Saving the Orphanage: If by orphanage you mean "Goon Docks", then yes, this is the motivating factor behind the adventure.
Ship Tease: Between Mouth and Stef. A whole damn lot of it.
The exchange they have in the deleted convenience store scene just reeks of Foe Yay:
Stef: You still smell like a plumber's son.
Mouth: And you still smell like a fisherman's daughter.
Shipshape Shipwreck: One-Eyed Willie's 350-year-old pirate ship actually sails out onto the open seas at the end. While the ship is not submerged, it has been sitting in water for three centuries in a wet, brackish cavern with lots of moisture dripping from stalactites. Aside from the skeleton of Willie, the ship and even its sails appear to be in fairly good condition.
Sloth is first seen wearing a Los Angeles Raiders T-shirt (when the film was shot, the Raiders were based in LA. They have since moved back to Oakland). John Matuszak, who portrayed Sloth, formerly played for the Raiders.
Ten-Second Flashlight: A non-video-game example: Data activates his "Bully Blinders" because nobody else brought a flashlight to the cave. While the intense light does indeed blind the rest of the gang for a few moments, it also burns out the batteries just as quickly.
Data: Data's okay. But Data's tired of falling and Data's tired of skeletons.
This Way to Certain Death: The characters run across the long-dead body of treasure hunter Chester Copperpot in their search for One-Eyed Willy's ship. Some of them want to turn back, but Mikey convinces them that this is a good sign, because it means that they're on the right track, and they have already got farther than a professional treasure hunter.
Mrs. Walsh: Mrs. Walsh: Pants and shirts are in the second. Just throw them all into cardboard boxes. Forget the suitcases. Clark, can you translate all of that?
Mouth: Why certainly, Mrs. Walsh.
Mrs. Walsh: That's wonderful.
Mouth: (to Rosalita, in Spanish) The marijuana goes in the top drawer. The cocaine and speed in the second. The heroin in the bottom. Always separate the drugs.
Mrs. Walsh: Now Rosalita, this is the attic. Mr. Walsh doesn't like anybody up here, ever. That's why it's always open.
Mouth: (in Spanish) Never go up there. It's filled with Mr. Walsh's sexual torture devices.
Mrs. Walsh: This is my supply closet. You'll find everything you need: brooms, dustpans, insect spray. I would really like the house clean when they tear it down. Clark, can you translate?
Mouth: (in Spanish) If you do a bad job you'll be locked in here with the cockroaches, for two weeks without food and water.
Mrs. Walsh: Okay, Rosie? Okay? You're going to be very happy here. Come on, Clark, we've got much more to do. You're so fluent in languages!
Rosalita: (in Spanish) My God, I'm in a crazy house!
Undead Author: According to the legend, One-Eyed Willie killed off all of his men after making the map; when asked how the map and story got out, Mikey comments that he asked his dad this too, and his dad said one of them must have escaped. The scene of the crime seems to imply that Willie and his top officers all killed each other off fighting over the treasure at the table.
Mikey: I know how these guys must have died. What a mess.
Jake: You always take his side, Mama. You always liked him better than me.
Mama: (Smacks Jake) That's right!
Vomit Chain Reaction: Chunk claims he accidentally started one in a movie theater as a result of a practical joke involving fake puke. He admits he felt bad for doing it.
Walk the Plank: Mama Fratelli makes Andy walk the plank off the pirate ship.
Workplace-Acquired Abilities: Andy is able to save her friends from a deadly trap on account of the fact she took piano lessons when she was four years old.
The World's Expert on Getting Killed: Treasure hunter Chester Copperpot got killed by the first pirate booby trap he encountered. The Goonies decide to be inspired by the fact that they've made it farther than the expert.
Worthy Opponent: Mikey very much treats One-Eyed Willy this way. And in an odd way, when Mikey warns the others not to take the treasure from the scales because "that's Willy's", the following reaction shot of his skeleton almost seems to suggest he respected Mikey for understanding that.
It could also suggest Willy's relieved because touching his treasure from the scales would set up another booby trap.
One-Eyed Willy's treasure. Most of the treasure is lost completely, but the handful of gems that Mikey holds onto is enough to save the Goon Docks from being turned into a country club.
In the Novelization, it turns out that the results of the adventure result in enough funds even after everyone pays off their leases to not only buy the (now-unfinishable and therefore worthless) country club and then raze it to build affordable housing, but to add numerous local fixtures such as a brand new museum for Mikey's dad to chair.
Once the ship makes its escape to sea, though, it's reasonable enough to assume they'd be able to get a convoy together to bring it back in within a couple days and get a massive finder's fee for the Goonies, now that the town was saved. His dad runs the museum, after all.
Anything that goes down with the ship is the property of whoever salvages it, but it's still a good bet that the museum will be among the first to get a team on the ground. And the gems are really all they need.
When Mikey brings the jewels off the ship, he hasn't just laid claim to a few pretty rocks. Under US and international maritime salvage law, the rights to a salvage vessel and its contents go to the person or persons who first successfully brings something off the vessel in question. Since Mikey was that person for Willy's ship, the ship and everything that's in it is his!
Most importantly, that small handful of gems, depending on their quality, alone may be worth a great deal. A single 2 caret flawless Burmese ruby is worth $50K+. Depending on the quality of those gems, he may have been holding a small fortune in gemstones.