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Funny: The Goonies
  • Chunk is the source of many of the films great funny moments.
    • Chunk spilling his Pepsi on himself.
    Chunk: Aww, shit!
    Chunk: Okay Brand, Michael Jackson didn't come over to my house to use the bathroom. But his sister did!
    • Chunk drops the statue.
    • Chunk glues the penis on the statue upside down.
    Chunk: Look, how's that? How's that?
    Mikey: Oh you idiot! You glued it upside-down!
    Brand: If God made us do it that way, you'd all be pissing in your faces!
    Chunk: Looks fine to me.
    • And Chunk and Mouth thought Mrs. Walsh saw it.
    Mrs. Walsh: What is that?
    Chunk: Oh shit, what?
    • And let us not forget the entire confession scene where Chunk spills his guts to the Fratellis?
      • Jake enjoys listening to them, especially the fake(?) puke story.
      Jake: I'm beginning to like this kid, ma.
      Ma Fratelli: HIT PUREE!
    • This dialogue:
    Chunk: Pizza...
    Everyone: Shhh.
    Chunk: Pepperoni...
    Everyone: SHHHHH!!
    • Meeting Sloth for the first time:
    Chunk: Come on, let me out! (looks back, laughing nervously) Hi sir, my name is Lawrence. Sometimes people call me Chunk.
    Sloth: RAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!
    (Chunk starts to panic)
    Sloth: RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!
    (Chunk starts hopping around. Sloth smiles and decides hop around too.)
    Chunk: HELP!!! LET ME OUT OF HERE!!!!
  • When Mouth sticks his tongue through a picture.
    Mouth: Mikey? Mikey? Come on, help me feel like a woman. Come one, give me a nice wet lickery kiss.
  • When Brand gets tied to the chair.
    Brand: I'm gonna hit you so hard when you wake up your clothes are gonna be out of style!
  • When the Fratellis find the body of Chester Copperpot.
    Jake: (checking the wallet) Looks like they picked him clean, Ma.
    Mother Fratelli: Sure, right before they ate him.
    Francis: Stupid.
  • "I'll show you a tremor!" (slap)
  • From a deleted scene:
    Mouth: It's okay, Brand. Just remember we're all here for you. (Mouth takes the map from Brand's pocket) Here's to good friends...
    Mouth, Data, and Chunk: Tonight is kinda special!
  • When the Goonies came upon under a wishing well:
    Mouth: (looking at coins) President Lincoln... George Washington... Uh, Martin Sheen...
    Stef: Martin Sheen?! That's President Kennedy, you idiot!
    Mouth: Well, same difference! I mean, he played Kennedy once!
    Stef: Oh that's real smart! It's nice to see you're using your brain!
    Mouth: Yeah? Well, at least I have a brain!
    Stef: You're so stupid, Mouth!
    Mouth: Oh yeah?
    Stef: Yeah! (Mouth makes a "stupid" face at her) SHUT UP!!
  • After Francis falls prey to Data's "slick shoes".
    Jake: (flinched) Ooh!
    Ma Fratelli: Francis? Sweetheart, are you okay??
    Francis: (high-pitched whimper) ...no.
  • The scene where Mouth is forced to remove some of the treasure from his person.
    Ma Fratelli: You're so quiet all of a sudden. You're the one they called Mouth, right?
    Mouth: (shakes his head) Mm-mmm!
    (She sticks her fingers into his mouth and pulls out a pearl necklace)
    Ma Fratelli: Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha... (still pulling) Oh my god. (finally got it all out) Is that all?
    Mouth: Mm-hmm.
    (She hits the back of his head, making him spit out all the coins.)
    Ma Fratelli: Oh... my... god!
    (Mouth spits out one last coin)
  • Jake: Remember, we were gonna get your teeth fixed. But we spend the money on Francis' toupee!
    Francis: I DON'T WEAR A HAIRPIECE!!
  • Mikey tries to tell everyone what he saw (Sloth).
    Mikey: I swear on my life! They've got it... an 'IT!' A giant 'IT!' They got it chained to the wall! When it came into the light it was all gross and distorted, and, and the parts were mixed around!
    (Data, Chunk, and Mouth were disgusted, while Brand rolls his eyes)
    Brand: Yeah, kinda like your brain, right lame-o? Say goodbye to your little pals.

Gone with the WindFunny/FilmGordy

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