The Last Son of Krypton, who uses most of his time and incredible powers to be a total dick to everyone.
- Beware the Superman: Given how many times he's destroyed things, attacked Metropolis, denied water to people dying of thirst, ruined his friends' lives, and generally tormented everything around him, yes, you should.
- Brutal Honesty: Sometimes. Given what a dick he usually is, it comes as no surprise.
- Disproportionate Retribution: And the victims are lucky if he's going after them out of spite. Often he'll just assault innocents.
- Domestic Abuse: This cover. Though the cover points out that the woman got off lightly, if she came out of a beating by Superman with just a few bruises.
- Dumb Muscle: He's apparently none too bright, along with being none too heroic.
- Enfant Terrible: Even as a young child, he did stuff like releasing criminals from prison, destroying his parents' home, and other such acts of unapologetic dickery.
- Evil Is Petty: His crimes range from genocide to harassing Jimmy.
- Jerkass: They don't call the site Superdickery for nothing.
- Kick the Dog: Basically every other cover has him doing something horrible to someone (sometimes his friends, sometimes random bystanders) for no apparent reason.
- Mind Rape: When physical destruction feels bland for a while, he'll move to slowly torturing victims mentally.
- Nice Hat: The Pope Hat. Only appeared on one cover but was frequently mentioned and praised by the writer. Actually appeared in the Superdickery tribute episode of Batman: The Brave and the Bold. And the cover itself on which it appears is declared by Dial B for Blog as the second most famous comic cover ever, following The Flash #179.
- Not as You Know Them: Compare this Superman with the actual Superman.
- Omnicidal Maniac: At times.
- Smug Smiler: Whenever he dishes out his dickery, he'll generally have a smug grin on his face.
Supposedly 'Superman's Pal', but in reality it's more like 'Superman's Favorite Victim'. Usually he's a normal human, but he definitely has a tendency to attract strange, temporary superpowers.
- Almighty Janitor: Most literally when he gets various super powers, but he's also apparently an astronaut.
- Butt-Monkey: The most common victim of Superman's dickery.
- The Dog Bites Back: There are covers where he turns the tables on Superman.
- Superpower Silly Putty: He gets powers so often it's a drinking game.
The Caped Crusader, fellow hero to Superman and also a dick. He is totally not in a gay relationship with Robin.
- Ambiguously Gay: The website keeps trying to claim that he's not gay, dammit, but the evidence winds up damning him to the point that the commentator can't even form a defense.
- Asshole Victim: The times Superman has killed him/exposed his identity.
- Depending on the Writer: He's either a victim of Superman's dickery, attempting to stop Superman, or sometimes teaming up with him for "double dickery".
A reporter obsessed with Superman (who, naturally, is a dick to her). A lot of other people are equally obsessed with making her a Damsel in Distress.
- And Now You Must Marry Me: Said by her to Superman, or by someone else to her. Including two months in a row for the latter.
- Asshole Victim: She gets hurt a lot, but the lengths she's gone to to get Superman's identity/force him to marry her make it hard to feel sorry for her.
- Butt-Monkey: Keeps getting killed by Superman. It's even the page picture.
- They Killed Kenny Again: See above.
- What Does She See in Him?: You really have to wonder why Lois is so obsessed with Superman despite all the terrible things he's done to her.
Superman's cousin and equal in dickery.
- Bestiality Is Depraved: Supergirl seems to a bit...attached...to Comet the Superhorse
- Butt-Monkey: Whenever she isn't engaging in dickery, she's most often a victim of Superman.
- Distaff Counterpart: Possibly the only character who can match Superman's dickery.
- Jerkass: What do you think Superman was training her for?
- Not as You Know Them: The actual Silver Age Supergirl was a sweet, naive girl who developed into a mature, nice woman. This Supergirl is... not nice.
- Woman Scorned: As the annotation said, "Note to self: Do not date Supergirl"
Amazon warrior who gets tied up a lot, not that she really minds.
- Depraved Bisexual
- Distaff Counterpart: Of Superman. In the sense that they're both dicks.
- Too Kinky to Torture: The site regards her habit of getting tied up as this.
Batman's sidekick. Totally not also his boyfriend.
- Ambiguously Gay
- Butt-Monkey: Often the victim of mean pranks courtesy of Superman and Batman.
- Distressed Damsel: This most famously occurred when Green Lantern, Flash, Atom and Batman were all worried about their wives... all, that is, except for Batman, who expressed his fear for Robin in the same tone.
- They Killed Kenny Again: It seems Mr Wayne goes through orphans faster than most of us go through out shoes. Notably Batman's reaction to finding Robin's hanging corpse is "Oh no, not again!".
Superman's civilian identity. Superman is a dick to him too, however that's supposed to work.
- Butt-Monkey: Superman seems to hate him and at least once had thugs beat him up
- Cyborg: He seems to be one in this cover
- Driven to Suicide: Superman fakes this for Kent with surprising regularity.
- Mind Screw: How exactly are Clark Kent and Superman able to interact at all, let alone Clark be the victim of Superman's dickery?
Clark's adoptive parents. They appear in the 'Superbaby' comics, where they really don't want anyone to know that Clark has super powers.
- Skewed Priorities: They're more worried about people finding out about Clark's abilities than the havoc he's wreaking.
Superman's arch-enemy, who really ought to be counting his lucky stars that he's survived so many of Superman's dickish antics.
- Asshole Victim: Superman let him get shot in the gut as punishment for stealing cakes.
- Evil Is Petty: The site really plays up how Luthor's hatred of Superman stemmed from the incident where he lost his hair.
- Made of Iron: One cover has Luthor survive being punched through a brick wall. Note that Luthor is usually portrayed as a Badass Normal.
Batman's nemesis, who has a weird fixation with the word "boner."
- Ambiguously Gay: The site implies him as this, particularly with his aforementioned fixation on the word "boner."
The Fastest Man Alive, he appears in frequent covers on the website in...less-than-desirable situations. Also in a forbidden relationship with his nephew-by-marriage Wally.
- Baleful Polymorph: He's been transformed into a marionette and a grotesquely obese man, just for a few examples.
- Butt-Monkey: He's been chased by a penis-shaped rocket and punched out by Superman, among other things.
- Epic Fail: Getting somehow stuck in a hole that's only maybe three feet deep at most and dying of apparent starvation down there?◊ Yeah, not his finest moment.
- Incest Is Relative: There are a few too many images on the site that show him and Wally in...inappropriate positions.
- Super Speed: Although he's had to deal with the indignity of Superman out-pacing him while rubbing it in his face.