"So, in this comic we find out Superboy would rather be pimping out his ho than saving innocents." A hero rises
inconvenienced when his
vacation plans are disrupted! The
They told us that Returns just skipped over
Superman III and
IV, but I prefer to think of it as the movie that wouldve happened if Superman never got over being a douchebag in this one.
"Hordes of impressionable poverty-stricken young people having all their arms and legs broken by an extremely-rich businessman."
This, boys and girls, is what we call a 'hook'. But don't worry; it's like what they used to do in superhero comics where the cover shows Superman about to dropkick a baby into a volcano or something to force you to buy the comic and discover "oh, turns out all along it was a volcano-shaped sweets shop when it's the baby's birthday".