Not all stalkers are motivated by sexual or romantic desire. Some are non-romantically obsessed with someone, some want a favor from someone, some want to kill someone or otherwise do them ugly, some just want to stalk someone for the hell of it, or whatever other motive. Compare and contrast Stalker with a Crush. Contrast because it refers to motives other than having a crush on someone, and compare because it can often resemble that motive for stalking through the "Does This Remind You of Anything?" approach. Also, sometimes a Stalker Without A Crush can develop a crush on whoever they were stalking over time.
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Anime and Manga
- Muteki Kanban Musume: At Episode 2A “Challenger: His name is Nishiyama Kankuro”, When Miki feels she is Being Watched, Akihiko invokes a Stalker with a Crush on her. Miki denies it, sensing agression. That agression is projected by Kankuro, who has come back to town to get revenge on Miki's bullying.
- This is used in same way in the two versions of Love, Chunibyo & Other Delusions, with only a few differences.
- Light novel: Rikka follows Yuuta around for a bit where she overhears him letting out his inner chuuni after he lends her his umbrella. This ends up putting them down the path to hitching up when she decides to make a contract with him.
- Anime: Rikka follows Yuuta around during the time that she's living with Touka right after her father dies but before they move into their grandparent's house, admiring him while he screws around in his Dark Flame Master persona. It's more ambiguous whether she had a crush on him or not.
- In the BW chapter of Pokémon Adventures, it turns out that N had been watching Black (and later White) for most of Black's initial journey.
- The Shinigami of Death Note follow whoever uses the notebook and are supposed to continue this behavior until the user dies or relinquishes ownership.
- Light spends one episode following Raye Penber's fiancée around, trying to find out her real name before she goes to the police with information on the Kira case.
- Blue Exorcist has Saburota Todo become this towards Okumura Yukio. It is full of squicky rapist subtext and he seriously freaks out Yukio.
- Return to Labyrinth, the manga sequel for Labyrinth, has this for Jareth towards Toby. It's implied that after Sarah rescued her brother and defeated him, Jareth had been watching Toby and Sarah. He had been more involved with Toby, though, thinking that he could make the boy happy by "granting" his wishes. His stalking eventually leads to physically showing up wherever Toby is.
- In Bleach, Aizen claims that he's known Ichigo since the day he was born and has been manipulating him since the very beginning, including arranging his first meeting with Rukia. The purpose of this was to help Ichigo reach his potential so Aizen may have a Worthy Opponent that would allow him to achieve higher levels of transcendency. Later chapters reveal that this was not a lie. Aizen was present the day Isshin and Masaki first met and was in fact the reason they met at all, meaning Ichigo wouldn't have been conceived if not for Aizen.
- Doctor Tenma to Astro in the 2003 version of Astro Boy. The without a crush part is further hammered in with Astro being a robot and Tenma being his father in two different ways, however it still manages to come across as very creepy (which Astro outright says in a Crowning Moment of Funny).
- Shiina did that in Koufuku Graffiti just to know her Old Retainer Tsuyuko's birthday. This is particularly justifiable as Tsuyuko is Shiina's Parental Substitute.
- In The Devil Is a Part-Timer!, Emi does regular stakeouts outside of Maou's apartment and frequently shadows him around town on the off chance that one of his daily errands does turn out to be a nefarious misdeed. She is aware of how bad this looks.
Emi: And, once again, I spent today being a stalker.
- It's revealed in Inside Mari that Mari had been stalking Isao. It's ironic as Isao himself is a Stalker with a Crush to Mari. They're perfect strangers as Isao is a college-aged shut-in while Mari is a high schooler. Later on it's implied that Isao isn't even a Stalker with a Crush. Mari is an Unreliable Narrator who simply imagined he was stalking her.
- Kouichi, the Sixth Ranger of Digimon Frontier, is first seen as a human following Kouji to the station the day everyone goes to the Digital World. Flashbacks later on show him hanging around the shadows outside Kouji's house, watching him interact with his father and stepmother. His reason: They're brothers, twins Separated at Birth, a fact that Kouichi only recently learned. The stalking seems to be his way of working up the nerve to approach. This does not stop people from viewing him as a Stalker with a Crush.
- In the fanfic Back To The Future Prequel, Hank follows Doc even in public places to intimidate and bully him in revenge for Doc accidentally hurting his sister.
- In the Pokémon fanfic "Xanthic Growlithe Contract", researchers would stalk a herd of Ponyta and Rapidash. This agitated them so much that the herd disbanded and did the Pokémon equivalent of miscarrying all their offspring.
- In the Harry Potter / The Dark Knight Saga crossover fanfic Ace Of Spades, Harry becomes one towards Commissioner Gordon after he comes to the conclusion that Gordon is Sirius Black with amnesia.
- In the Princess Tutu fanfic, An Uncommon Witness, Hardboiled Detective Fakir starts to stalk Duck because she's a key witness in the case against a very powerful and dangerous mafia, but as the case is still not solid enough for witness protection to step in, he decided to do it himself. Amusingly, Duck's friends believe him to be a very persistent suitor.
- Pick any horror movie with a slasher killer. Chances are that the killer stalks and harasses someone who doesn't know them that well because the killer is an Ax-Crazy lunatic who wants to kill them. Said serial killer would follow them around forever until they have the perfect opportunity open.
- Deadly Encounter features a single mother being harassed by a man who she cut off on the freeway.
- Ghostface in the Scream film series is always watching innocent people from afar so he can see what their insides look like. The killer's main target is a woman named Sydney Prescott, since she's the only one who's survived multiple attacks from the killer. Well...killers.
Can you see me? 'Cause I can see you.
- Darth Vader towards Luke in Star Wars, which is justified if you know the twist.
- Michael Myers from Halloween series follows his victims around for hours in order to get them alone so he can kill them and get away with it. He's probably one of the few patient murderers seen in film who doesn't enjoy or rush in killing.
- Mason Verger towards Hannibal, since he desires swift vengeance on Dr. Lecter for disfiguring his face and confining him to a wheelchair for life. His goal is to finally capture Lecter and have him Fed to Pigs.
- Lila Loomis and Mrs.Spool in Psycho II are following around Norman Bates because they have specific plans for him.
- The I. Rex in Jurassic World follows its prey persistently just so it can kill For the Evulz.
- The Terminator and its later models are killing machines manufactured to find and locate specific targets and never stop hunting them until they're terminated.
- Sy of One Hour Photo does love the Yorkins, but isn't attracted to any of them. He just wants to be part of what he sees as an ideal family, in a "kindly uncle" role.
- Luciano stalks Enzo in Reality, to the point of sneaking through the air vents into his dressing room. He doesn't want to see Enzo naked, he just wants to speak with him in private as a Messianic Archetype.
- In the novel Strangers on a Train, Charlie Bruno stalks Guy Haines after murdering his wife, in order to try and make Haines fulfill his end of the Murder Swap he never agreed to.
- In The Belgariad series, anyone who wants to be a disciple of Aldur has to stalk him until he gets irritated enough to grant their wish, just so they'll quit stalking him. The situation may be reversed when he wants you to be his disciple.
- In the Douglas Adams novel The Long Dark Teatime Of The Soul, private dick Dirk Gently explains that he will pick a random car to follow if he gets lost while he's driving. He finds that while often he never gets where he intended, he always ends up where he needed to be.
- In The Chronicles of Vladimir Tod, Eddie Poe is one, following Vlad around for the perfect moment to snap a picture and expose him as a vampire, or rather an half-vampire.
- Granted, we don't actually know how the giant slug from The Night Land is feels about its quarry, but it's a pretty safe bet that it doesn't view them in that way.
- The entirety of Green Eggs and Ham involves Sam-I-Am stalking an unnamed character (also the narrator of the book). Throughout the story, Sam wants the unnamed character to sample a dish of green eggs and ham, much to the latter's annoyance.
- Macon to Ethan in Beautiful Creatures. He was sneaking into Ethan's room while Ethan slept to eat Ethan's dreams in order to "replenish" himself. Ethan is understandably freaked out when he realizes.
- In the Millennium Trilogy, Lizbeth Salander regularly stalks people online for fun and profit. She's even developed a virus that can allow her to observe other people's computer usage.
- In the Midnight Louie books, Kathleen O'Connor, alias Kitty the Cutter, is this to Max Kinsella, and his one-time lover Temple Barr and her new lover Matt Devine get drawn in by extension. After a brief fling with her in his youth, she became obsessed with Revenge on him for perceived violations. She's been after him ever since.
- The Stormlight Archive: The leader of the Azir, the Prime Aqasix, is said to belong to the entire nation, so anyone can enter a lottery in order to watch him sleep or go about his day to day business.
Lift: Sounds creepy.
Gawx: A little.
- Deathstroke from Arrow has been following Oliver Queen ever since he discovered where his archenemy lived. He's planted cameras in Queen's mansion, sent spies to gain his trust, personally befriended his family, abducted his sister, studied Oliver's entire life, found out who his loved ones were, and told his closest friends about his secret identity as Green Arrow. The entire purpose of these events is to ruin Oliver's entire life before killing him out of revenge.
- In Our Miss Brooks, the episode "Here is Your Past" sees Miss Brooks and Mrs. Davis being stalked by a mysterious man with a black moustache. The stranger forces Connie to a TV studio where she's guest of honor on the Here is Your Past TV program.
- In Bones, the season four episode "Man in the Outhouse" has Noel Liftin, a stalker who was previously on the show as a Stalker with a Crush. Booth pays him $50 to "stalk" one of their suspects and get more information. He proves to be frighteningly good at it.
- In Teen Wolf, werewolf Derek Hale has a tendency to come off as this to people, including other werewolves and those he wants to join his pack. Stiles has even called him out on it. However, from hints throughout the series, it seems that this isn't too odd a behavior among werewolves as a whole.
- An episode of CSI: New York has a kid creepily following Stella around. When they finally confront him, they find out he thinks she's Mac's deceased wife, who gave the kid up for adoption 17 years ago.
- Subverted in an episode of Life On Mars, a gunman takes over the offices of a newspaper, holding the editor, a reporter, Sam and Hunt hostage, at one point he gives a detailed account of what everyone does after hours. The reporter accuses him of spying on them, it turns out he's worked there for the last eight years and has finally snapped after getting no recognition for what he does.
- In The Escape Artist, Foyle starts stalking Will Burton's family just because Will didn't shake his hand, resulting in the eventual murder of Will's wife. His later stalking of Maggie may or may not delve into Stalker with a Crush territory.
- The Flash (2014)
- The Reverse-Flash a.k.a. Harrison Wells/ Eobard Thawne has been obsessed with Barry Allen for most of his life. Much like in the comics, it started out as an attempt to be the Flash, only to learn that he was basically destined to be Flash's Arch-Enemy. This culminated in him killing Barry's mother, only for that to strand him in the past with no way back but the real Flash's speed. He proceeded to spend over a decade keeping tabs on Barry and ensuring his origin story happened "ahead of schedule". He even went as far as to implant hidden cameras in Barry's house and even in the homes of his friends and family.
- Vandal Savage has been following Hawkgirl and Hawkman every century in order to kill them and absorb their powers to increase his immortality. He does have a (decidedly one-sided) obsession with Hawkgirl, but it's mainly about prolonging his lifespan.
- In The Haunting Hour, a child protagonist is usually stalked by the Monster of the Week because it wants to kill them.
- In Season 2 of Dexter, Doakes begins stalking Dexter because he correctly suspects that Dexter is hiding a dark secret.
- In The Walking Dead, the Claimers and Gareth's group have followed Rick's group in order to kill them out of vengeance because Rick murdered members of their own survival groups. They fail.
- Community: Abed's not understanding people's boundaries often borders on this. In "Cooperative Polygraphy", he reveals that he puts tracking devices on all his friends so he'll know where they are at all times.
- Vhisola in BIONICLE was obsessed with her former teacher and only friend Nokama, so much that she dedicated her own house to make a Stalker Shrine for her. After Nokama got transformed into a Toa warrior, however, her obsession quickly turned to jealousy and hate, as she couldn't cope with the notion that Nokama's duty of protecting their city would mean spending less time with her.
- Dilbert's Dogbert needed to do research on the customer base which consists of stupid rich people. In the next panel, he was revealed to be stalking a group of golfers.
- Dungeons & Dragons 1st Edition Oriental Adventures (1985) supplement. If an application to study with a martial arts master fails, the prospective student may begin courting the master, trying to gain his favor (e.g. by giving a small gift or offering). The hopeful student may continue until either they are accepted or they offend the master.
- In Alien: Isolation, the Xenomorphs which seeks out and kills Ripley in the space station. Then there's the Working Joes who are programmed to kill anyone still alive in Nostromo.
- The Shadow in Amnesia: The Dark Descent. It relentlessly hunts Daniel where ever he goes, all the way from Africa, Britain, to Prussia it will not stop until it has devoured Daniel.
- In Batman: Arkham Asylum, Scarecrow and Victor Zsasz obsess over following their intended victims before killing them. Zsasz was able to gain a thorough knowledge on his psychiatrist's personal life and followed her home so he could murder her until Batman stopped him. While Scarecrow has been monitoring Batman ever since he entered the Asylum.
- Scarecrow is back to stalking Batman in Arkham Knight. Only this time he has the titular Arkham Knight helping him by revealing the identities of Batman's allies so Scarecrow can hurt them in order to make his archenemy suffer.
- Throughout Batman: Arkham City, Azrael can be seen watching over Batman at several points in the story.
- Bane in Batman: Arkham Origins has been tracking Bruce Wayne because he knows he's Batman. In fact, all of the assassins are tracking down the dark knight because there's a $50,000,000 reward for his head.
- In The Charnel House Trilogy Rob appears to be a Stalker with a Crush for the protagonist Alex, but it is revealed that he actually stalks her because he sees her as a surrogate for his lost daughter and actually despises the very idea of her as a sexual being, so much so that he kidnapped her boyfriend, Gavin, and cut off his limbs little by little.
- Olivia from Fire Emblem Awakening tries to stalk her Kid from the Future Inigo... in hopes to see him dance, since he's shy about doing it in public.
- Subverted with Gerome and Noire. He stalks her with platonic intentions (she's an Ill Girl and he's worried about her health but is too much of an Ineffectual Loner to act on it), but it turns out he can develop feelings for her and he realises it when she directly asks him if he likes her... which happens only if they get an S support which leads to a Relationship Upgrade.
- Five Nights at Freddy's the animatronics who wander the pizzeria at night, and when they reach the security room, they will stuff the night watch in a Freddy suit, which is filled with mechanical parts, and the man inside will be killed.
- White Face from Imscared is completely obsessed with the player. Either he's completely obsessed with looking at the player, or he's lonely and needs someone to stay with him. Maybe.
- The Last of Us has a type of Infected labeled "Stalkers".
- In The Legend of Zelda series, Ganon(dorf) kidnaps Zelda not out of attraction, but to extract the Triforce of Wisdom out of her.
- In Mass Effect 2, depending on the interpretation, Harbinger's single-minded obsession with Shepard is either this or Stalker with a Crush.
- Legion, the geth, has been following Shepard ever since his temporary death in the beginning of the game. He's even built Shepard's old armor into his metal plating. However, it's revealed that he's on the hero side and only wanted to join the commander in his quest to stop the reapers. Though he still has a creepy, thorough knowledge on Shepard's life.
- The Shadow Broker monitors everyone throughout the universe. Not because of any wicked intent, but so he can acquire information on everyone that would provide a profit for him if he were to sell it to some potential buyers. Since he's an Information Broker, it's strictly just for business.
- The murderer in Left Alone chooses to follow Joel around instead of, you know, killing him to keep his location a secret.
- Silver stalks Lance in Pokémon HGSS in an attempt to get a rematch with him after their encounter in the Mahogany Rocket Hideout.
- The Ustanak in Resident Evil 6 refuses to stop following Jake Muller and Sherry Birkin until they're dead.
- Pyramid Head from Silent Hill 2 relentlessly walks through the titular town to find James. He knows what his enemy is doing, tries to prevent him from journeying away from Silent Hill, knows where he'll be next, and never stops following him throughout the game. It turns out that Pyramid Head is a symbolic representation of James' guilt and has been stalking him because he was created to punish James for his sins.
- In a bit of Ascended Fanon, Waluigi is now this to Luigi of Super Mario Bros.. His intentions are to make Luigi's life miserable.
- The Slender Man IS RIGHT BEHIND YOU!!!!
- The Stranger in Tales from the Borderlands has captured Fiona and Rhys after trailing them all across Pandora and asking them personal questions about their journey of all the events they've endured throughout the game because he's really their former teammate Loader Bot and he's been following them in order to get the team back together again to save a fallen friend.
- In Touhou, Suika Ibuki and Yukari Yakumo are often portrayed as this, due to their powers (turning into mist and creating portals respectively).
- The Stranger in The Walking Dead has been following Lee and Clementine ever since the second chapter. Following them all the way from Macon, Georgia to the coast. His main goal is to abduct Clementine to replace his dead children and murder Lee.
- The Crooked Man and his gang from The Wolf Among Us have followed Bigby Wolf and his friends in order to throw the detective of his trail, as he gets closer to solving the mystery.
- The Stalker from Warframe tracks any Player Character who killed a boss with the intent of killing them, randomly appearing in missions in which they take part. He has an ax to grind against the Tenno since he supposedly saw them betray the Abusive Precursors to which he was loyal to and sees himself as an agent of justice punishing the betrayers, so it's pretty safe to say he doesn't has any romantic feelings toward the Tenno.
- In Firewatch, Ned Goodwin is this. He spends the whole game listening to Henry and Delilah and following Henry around to make sure that he doesn't get caught. Little did he realize that him being paranoid about being found is what started the game's main conflict.
- Rena is this way towards Keiichi in the Onikakushi-hen arc of Higurashi: When They Cry. Rena does have feelings for him however her stalking isn't due to them. She is always following him, knows that his parents aren't home, and stands outside his bedroom window on a rainy night apologizing to him after upsetting him (even when she knew he couldn't see her). Keiichi misunderstands her unsettling behavior and thinks she's out to get him. She's simply being a concerned friend about his sudden change in attitude and aloofness. Rena had known he was home alone (and what ramen he liked) because she met his mom at the store earlier. It's left ambiguous if the rain incident was in his head or not, though it wouldn't be out of character for Rena to apologize like that.
- In Minuscule, the small spider stalks the fly much as in the image above.
- The Slender Man Mythos: Slender Man's MO. If there's a vlog series based on the mythos, expect to see him standing around in the background somewhere in a few episodes. If you can see him at all.
- 78MagnumXE of Encyclopediadramatica.ch, and his obsession with wanting to dispose of Nathan, he'll do anything to get rid of him even if it kills him, which eventually it will.
- In Darwin's Soldiers, ROSS (Rudyard Oscar Shelton software) is an artificial intelligence who internet-stalks his namesake in order to figure out why he was created.
- Heeeyyy, Angry Grandpa! This is Mustdestroyall!
- The killer in Season Two of Where the Bears Are starts out this way. Then he starts to genuinely fall for Reggie.
- Cracked: Parodied in "So You're Accidentally Stalking Helen Mirren"
- In Orbit, Neptune is this. Oh god, is he ever. He's always lurking, and there are no walls in space. You look behind you, and no matter how many AU are between you, Neptune is there.
Neptune (to Venus): You're prettyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.
- In The Boondocks, Lamilton Taeshawn, a psychopathic delinquent, is constantly being stalked by his former school counselor (turned vigilante), Dr. Doomis. Doomis knows how evil Lamilton really is, and obsessively follows around the kid, to try and prevent him from killing people some day. It got to the point that Taeshawn's grandmother filed a restraining order against Doomis.
- In The Simpsons, Burns goes broke because of his Yes-Man underlings, and is convinced that hiring Lisa would get him back on track what with her integrity. However, Lisa refuses to work for him, because she is convinced he does not deserve to be helped. Burns, in turn, follows her around in a very stalkerish manner, begging that she take the job.
- Spongebob Squarepants towards Squidward. He really likes Squidward and always wants to include Squiddie in his activities. Which is why Squidward can't stand the little guy.
- In Batman: The Animated Series, the episode Joker's Favor has the Joker following a man named Charlie around after he got into a fight with him on the road. Joker promised to spare Charlie's life if he would provide him a favor in return. Ever since then, Joker has been monitoring Charlie for years. Charlie learns that Joker has never stopped following him when the villain finally asks for his favor.
- Adventure Time has the Ice King, who repeatedly stalks Finn and Jake because he's lonely and wants them to hang out with him, and do things such as read them his fanfiction, and watch secret tapes with them.
- In the episode "Hitman," the Ice King stalks Finn and Jake at their house to protect them from the hitman he accidentally hired. (He thought that a "hitman" is a man who literally hits and punches people, as the Ice King wanted petty revenge, not deadly vengeance.) In the process, he follows them around and breaks into their house.
- Lemongrab repeatedly breaks into the Candy Castle to watch the candy people sleep in the episode "You Made Me!". He does this because his castle has no citizens, and he is desperately lonely and sad.
- The Ice Queen stalks Fionna to get to Prince Gumball. While the Ice Queen is a stalker with a crush, she was stalking Gumball's crush, not Gumball. She spent most of the episode trying to kill Fionna.
- Finn sometimes.
Finn: I watch you while you sleep!
- And the ending of "New Frontier." "I will never leave your side for the rest of our lives!"
- Finn and Princess Bubblegum do this to Lemongrab in "Too Young." They stalk him around the Candy Castle to play hideous pranks on him.
- Marceline does this sometimes, mostly to deliberately frighten or annoy people, and in a friendly, teasing manner.
- The squirrel from "The Duke," who so desperately wants Jake to print his letters in his newspaper column. "Princess Potluck" revealed the squirrel is still stalking Jake, five seasons later.
- In Danny Phantom, Vlad may be a Stalker with a Crush for Maddie, but he is equally willing to spy on and learn everything possible about her son Danny, who he'd just love to have as a son himself.
- Ogo from Robot and Monster is a good example of a really obsessive one. He's obsessed with both Robot and Monster and is his neighbor. He considers them as his best friends, but the two are terrified of him. Despite that, Monster considers him his friend, while Robot doesn't.
- Darkwing Duck, "Darkly Dawns the Duck". From the moment he crashes through Launchpad's ceiling during an opening chase with Bulba, Darkwing cannot get rid of the pilot. Launchpad isn't in love with Darkwing; he's just a fanboy who wants to make a good impression on his favorite real-life superhero. Darkwing ultimately finds this to be a positive thing as Launchpad proves to be the only source of help he has, given that he's alienated everybody else.
- King of the Hill: Dale Gribble monitors everyone because he's a Conspiracy Theorist who assumes that everyone's out to get him.
- Pinkie Pie becomes this multiple times in My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic, but given that she's stalking her friends it's fairly similar in themes to the stalker WITH a crush.
- "Griffon The Brush-Off" has Pinkie Pie following Rainbow Dash around a fair bit, but in a fairly cheerful way. Dash finds this slightly annoying at worst, but also amusing.
- "Party Of One" features a less pleasant variety when Pinkie's friends seem to be making excuses for why they aren't coming to her latest party. It turns out they were only avoiding her to throw her a surprise party and didn't want the surprise ruined.
- In "Feeling Pinkie Keen", Twilight stalks Pinkie Pie from the bushes (with binoculars and a safari hat, no less) in order to conduct a scientific study of her behavior. Pinkie is perfectly aware of what Twilight is doing, but plays along anyway.
- On a darker note, Starlight Glimmer appears to be following Twilight Sparkle around. It's strongly implied that she seeks revenge on her and her friends for defeating her along time ago.
- In her final appearance in ChalkZone, it's revealed that Terry has been stalking Rudy and Penny for months while gathering information regarding the chalk world. Even Vinnie, who hates the two children as much as Terry does, finds this creepy.
- Soundwave and his minion Laserbeak from Transformers Prime act as the eyes and ears of the Decepticons. He and his pet know and see everything that occurs on the flagship, including a certain Decepticon's plots of betrayal. However, he is more interested in spying on the Autobots and locating exactly where they have set up base.
- The Amazing World of Gumball: "The Sale" shows Gumball and Darwin to have an obsessive and stalker-esque Hero Worship of Mr. Robinson. When they find out Mr. Robinson is moving away, Gumball asks to take a lock of his hair to cook and eat so that Mr. Robinson will be a part of him forever.
- As Told by Ginger:
- Ginger's best friend Dodie is somewhat obsessed with her. She even has a Ginger wig for whatever reason.
- Blake is very interested in Carl and sometimes acts like this.
- You can now hire a monster clown to stalk small children a week before their birthday. He'll leave phone calls, post notes about how he's watching them and how he'll attack them and on their birthday, he'll smash a cake in their face.