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added the name of the character.

^^ (at the bottom of page 92)

• Arch-Enemy: Each hero - alongside each villain - has one or more symbols on their. If one damages another with the same symbol, then extra damage is dealt due to them being nemesis.

"Each hero - alongside each villain - has" -> "Each hero and villain has..."

"...have one or more symbols on their." On their what?

"...due to them being nemesis."

The plural of nemesis is nemeses, so:

->"...due to them being nemeses." Or, more understandably:

->"...due to them being in opposition." or something like that.

edited 5th Dec '15 9:16:59 PM by Arivne

I meant to say "on their card". Simple typo.

edited 3rd Dec '15 10:19:25 PM by Kingofsouls

I am a figment of your imagination

For Love Live funny section:

• Episode 3, Season 1: The Death Glare by Umi after Kotori reveals the new idol outfit for the performance, having forgotten about Umi's warning.
• Episode 9, Season 1: Eli joins μ's and tells the group not to get too over confident about the opening school ceremony success. Umi cries in joy as she's excited to finally find someone in the group who's more reliable other than herself in the group, which shocks Eli. Cue to Rin saying "You make it sound like the rest of us don't have any common sense." upon hearing it.
• Episode 10, Season 1:
  • The entire pillow fight scene is absolutely hilarious. That is, until Umi gets woken up. What actually happened was during the entire summer camp, Maki is the only one who refuses to play by Eli's 'no calling Senpai' rules so Nozomi decides to force Maki to join in by tossing the pillow at Nico and blaming her (after the girls minus Umi gets woken up by Honoka's eating sound). So the girls end up having a pillow fight until they accidentally hit Umi,which causes her to snap. Umi takes out her anger by knocking out Nico, Honoka and Eli with her 'supersonic pillow' and it takes a combine attack of Maki and Nozomi to knock her out before Umi's about to take out Hanayo and Rin.
• Episode 1, Season 2: The entire scene where Honoka makes her opening speech as the new Student Council President by catching the microphone in the air and starts singing with a dance sequence. Unfortunately the above incident never happens due to Honoka's Performance Anxiety.
• Episode 2, Season 2: Any scenes of Umi and her obssession about mountain climbing. Poor Rin.
• Episode 4, Season 2: The entire 'backup dancers' scenes. Nico's siblings, Kokoro and Kotaro, reveal that μ's consist of Nico and her backup dancers. They even visit Nico's house to see badly photoshop photos of Nico as the main leader. This doesn't sit well with Eli, Maki, Nozomi and Umi. The moment Nico returns home and sees μ's, Umi gives a Death Glare at Nico.◊ Cue to Nico's Screw This, I'm Outta Here moment, knowing that she's in deep trouble. Unfortunately, Nico gets caught when her sibling Kokoa exits out of the elevator; Nico makes a funny facial expression when Rin comments of her having another sibling.

edited 6th Dec '15 5:42:06 PM by andrew369

O.K., this is going to be a long one.

-> The Death Glare by Umi after Kotori reveals the new idol outfit for the performance, having forgotten about Umi's warning.

That's a Zero Context Example. What makes it funny?

That's what we call a run-on sentence. It should be split up into two smaller sentences like so:

->Eli joins μ's and tells the group not to get too over confident about the opening school ceremony success. Umi cries in joy as she's excited that she's finally found someone that's reliable than herself in the group, which shocks Eli.

Also, I'd change the second sentence like so:

-> Umi cries in joy because she's excited to finally find someone in the group who's more reliable than herself, which shocks Eli.

This violates Example Indentation because you only have one entry at the 2nd and 3rd indentation levels. Also, the third entry is clearly an addition to the entry above it, which is Natter. It should be combined into one entry like this:

• Episode 10, Season 1. The entire pillow fight scene is absolutely hilarious. That is, until Umi gets woken up. What actually happened was during the entire summer camp, Maki is the only one who refuses to play by Eli's 'no calling Senpai' rules so Nozomi decides to force Maki to join in by tossing the pillow at Nico and blames her (after the girls minus Umi gets waken up by Honoka's eating sound). So the girls end up having a pillow fight until they accidentally hit Umi, which causes her to snap. Umi takes out her anger by knocking out Nico, Honoka and Eli with her 'supersonic pillow' and it takes a combine attack of Maki and Nozomi to knock her out before Umi's about to take out Hanayo and Rin.

What actually happened was during the entire summer camp, Maki is the only one who refuses to play by Eli's 'no calling Senpai' rules so Nozomi decides to force Maki to join in by tossing the pillow at Nico and blames her (after the girls minus Umi gets waken up by Honoka's eating sound).

This is another run-on sentence.

->During the entire summer camp, Maki is the only one who refuses to play by Eli's 'no calling Senpai' rules. Nozomi decides to force Maki to join in by tossing the pillow at Nico and blames her (after the girls minus Umi gets waken up by Honoka's eating sound).

Some specific changes:

"...by tossing the pillow at Nico and blames her..."

->by tossing the pillow at Nico and blaming her

"...the girls minus Umi gets waken up..."

->the girls minus Umi get woken up

Another violation of Example Indentation and Natter. Just join them together like this:

• The entire scene where Honoka makes her opening speech as the new Student Council President by tossing her microphone in the air, catches it and starts singing with a dance sequence. Unfortunately the above incident never happens as Honoka has Performance Anxiety the moment she announce her name. Seriously, how did Honoka ends up being Student Council President in the first place?

And some grammar errors:

"...tossing her microphone in the air, catches it..."

->catching it

"...Honoka has Performance Anxiety the moment she announce her name...."

->announces

"...how did Honoka ends up..."

->end up

Was it one scene or multiple scenes?

->Either "The entire scene" or "All of the scenes"

->her obsession about mountain climbing.

Yes, this is also a violation of Example Indentation. It looks like this is one really long example, so let's merge them together.

• Episode 4, Season 2: The entire 'backup dancers' scenes. Nico's siblings, Kokoro and Kotaro reveals that μ's consist of Nico and her backup dancers. They even visit Nico's house to see a badly photoshop photos of Nico as the main leader. This doesn't sit well for Eli, Maki, Nozomi and Umi. The moment Nico returns home and sees μ's, Umi gives a Death Glare at Nico. Cue to Nico's Screw This, I'm Outta Here! moment, knowing that she's in deep trouble. Unfortunately, while being chase by them, Nico gets caught by her sibling Kokoa while making a funny facial expression when Rin comments of her having another siblings.

And some specific changes:

"The entire 'backup dancers' scenes." See my comment above. It looks like it should be "The entire 'backup dancers' sequence".

"Kokoro and Kotaro reveals"

->reveal

"a badly photoshop photos of Nico"

How many photos were there? It should be either:

->"a badly Photoshopped photo of Nico" or ->"badly Photoshopped photos of Nico"

"This doesn't sit well for Eli"

->This doesn't sit well with Eli

"while being chase by them"

->chased

"Rin comments of her"

->comments about

"having another siblings"

->sibling

Thus endeth the lesson for today. :)

edited 5th Dec '15 10:24:24 PM by Arivne

Call of Duty: Black Ops III

• BeeBeeGun the trailers of the game show a man using his arms to release flying robots that swarm over people in a manner reminiscent of bees and the Insect Swarm Plasmid from Bioshock

edited 6th Dec '15 8:20:11 AM by ConservativePip

Edit and update the post.

edited 6th Dec '15 5:42:57 PM by andrew369

^^

It will be easier to just re-write it.

• Bee-Bee Gun: The trailers of the game show a man using his arms to release flying robots that swarm over people in a manner reminiscent of bees and the Insect Swarm Plasmid from Bioshock.

Note that the Bioshock text is ''VideoGame/{{Bioshock}}''.

Work names should be Namespaced, either Blue Linked or Red Linked, and put in either italics or quotes (as per How to Write an Example - Emphasis For Work Names).

Something for the Ron the Death Eater page under fanwork examples for Video Games

• This Alternate Universe Sonic The Hedgehog fic, Severe Misery does this to Sally Acorn, Bunnie Rabbot, Fiona Fox (who is ironically faithful to her canon characterization), and Nicole Lynx, all of whom are turned into cruel Alpha Bitches that run a shady college sorority and bully the author's self-insert character. The fic ends with all four girls being murdered by a demonic black dog that was sent after them by the self insert character.

edited 10th Dec '15 7:05:42 PM by starkitty93

Just another animation junkie

• Battle in the Center of the Mind: Happen in To Love Ru when Rin is possessed from the evil sword Bladix and Rito use Mea's telephatic power to enter in the Rin's mind and free her.

Is ok?

change these sentences :

"...Rin is possessed from the evil sword Bladix"

to

"Rin is possessed by an evil sword called Bladix."

"Rito use Mea's telephatic power to enter in the Rin's mind and free her."

to

"Rito uses Mea's telepathic powers to enter Rin's mind and free her."

edited 9th Dec '15 9:27:17 PM by andrew369

^^^

You need a space between each comma and the word following it and between a word and an open parenthesis.

Names of main/long works go in italics as per How to Write an Example - Emphasis For Work Names.

Also, "cruel Alpha Bitches...bullies"

->bully

So:

• The Alternate Universe Sonic The Hedgehog fic, Severe Misery does this to Sally Acorn, Bunnie Rabbot, Fiona Fox (who is ironically faithful to her canon characterization), and Nicole Lynx, all of whom are turned into cruel Alpha Bitches that run a shady college sorority and bully the author's self-insert character.

edited 9th Dec '15 10:42:46 PM by Arivne

My example has been fixed

edited 10th Dec '15 7:06:29 PM by starkitty93

Just another animation junkie

• "Fantastic Voyage" Plot: Time Bokan series Yattodetman does this in the episode 37 where heroes and villains fight in the brain of one support character.

I have more for the Characters.Sentinels Of The Multiverse page for Guise and Unity. Also added a little to Guise's decription.

Guise

Hey everyone. Guise here. And I am the best hero in literally all of everything. Sure, I used to be Joseph King, a simple tabloid reporter (lies, all lies!) but I knew that I, Guise, was destined to be the best hero ever!

My general game plan is to be the most awesome, important, and most interesting hero on the battlefield by rushing in and saving the day after my minons - read: teammates - do the dirty work and soften the villain up a bit.

And because I'm special, I have a promo form: Santa Guise, champion of Christmas who helps deck the villains and fight the good fight in the war Thanksgiving wages against Christmas! And unlike most heroes this form lets me have two base powers because I'm better than everyone else!

• '80s Hair: I sport some nice purple '80s Hair when I borrowed Argent Adept's lute - sorry his lyra, he insists on calling it that - on the art for 'Let Me See That...'.
• Art Shift: Well I do have the power of improbability, so the art style on my cards tend to shift to portray my amazingness correctly.
• Chest Insignia: And it can change at will!
• Mechanically Unusual Fighter: Oh boy. The big one.
  • Okay, so my big trick is my ability to - ahem - borrow the cards and powers of my fellow hero characters and use them as if they were my cards and/or powers instead of their owner's for a turn. 'Let Me See That...' lets me snag an equipment, 'I Can Do That, Too!' lets me use one of my teammates powers, and while 'Oh Yea, I'm That Guy' doesn't actually borrow a card per say, it does let me get all the effects of one of my buddies Ongoing cards for a turn.
  • My alternate Santa Guise card gets in on the fun as well with it's own trick in addition to the one above. As mentioned in my introduction, being Santa lets me have two base powers instead of one (Notable exception: The Sentinels technically have four base powers, but mine are on the same character card instead of being spread out over four character cards, which means I still have more). And what do these powers do? The first one lets me give gifts to everyone by putting the top card of each hero deck into play face down, and the second lets a hero open their gifts by flipping all of their face down cards face up. The neat part is that when I put cards face down, they don't count as being played, and when they do get flipped up, they get treated as just played.
• Small Name, Big Ego: Don't let everyone's 'opinions' fool you: They love me and secretly wish they were me.
• Reality Warper: And all it took for me to get that power was to get crushed by a piano near a place where the Freedom Five fought Wager Master and absorb the ambient improbability somehow be a total amazing badass!
• You Gotta Have Blue Hair: Purple '80s Hair, thank you very much! And only on the art for 'Let Me See That...'.

Unity

• Arch-Enemy: Iron Legacy, Chokepoint, and the Radioactivist.
• Capture and Replicate: Unity is subjected to this during the Termi-nation arc. Someone (who it was is unknown) captured Unity, and hooked her up to Golem Unity with the intent to create a new Unity. In the main timeline, this doesn't succeed, but in the Iron Legacy timeline it does.
• Tragic Keepsake: Golem Unity is seen wearing Mr. Fixer's hat, who died in the Iron Legacy timeline.
• Pink Heroine: Unity seems to be wearing at least one pink article of clothing at all times. Her technopathic glow is also pink as well.
• Wrench Wench: Unity is at home in the garage, tinkering on her bots.

edited 12th Dec '15 9:51:21 PM by Kingofsouls

I am a figment of your imagination

^

"...get all the effects of one of my buddies Ongoing cards for a turn."

"buddies" is a possessive and needs an apostrophe.

->one of my buddies'

"...with it's own trick..."

->its

^^

Time Bokan needs to be italicized as per as per How to Write an Example - Emphasis For Work Names.

->Time Bokan

"does this in the episode 37"

->in episode 37

"the brain of one support character."

->the brain of a support character.

"does this" is Word Cruft.

"It's Occam's Shuriken! If the answer is elusive, never rule out ninjas!"

More for the Characters.Sentinels Of The Multiverse page! This time for The Naturalist and the villainous Miss Information.

The Naturalist

Michael Conteh was the head of the largest energy and development company in Africa, ravaging the land for profit. One day, he was cursed by Akash'Buta into a gazelle, and he fled into the wild. Thankfully, the Argent Adept found him and helped him gain the ability to transform into a rhinoceros and crocodile. Now the Naturalist can control his shapeshifting and uses it to fight for the wilds he once ravaged.

During battle Naturalist relies on getting one of his three animal forms - gazelle, rhinoceros, or crocodile - into play. Several of the cards in Naturalist decks have kickers that provide extra perks if the correct Form is in play, allowing Naturalist to change gears and shift his role on the team.

Naturalist's promo form is The Hunted Naturalist, where he is not only on the run from Ambuscade, but is losing control of his shapeshifting.

• Arch-Enemy: Deadline, Equity, and Ambushcade's upcoming incarnation from 'Villains of the Multiverse'.
• Heel–Face Turn: Went from a CEO who's company laid waste to nature to a shapeshifting superhero dedicated to protecting it.
• Fighter, Mage, Thief: Naturalist's animal Forms fit this dynamic. Rhinoceros is the Fighter, with many of the rhino-centric cards allowing Naturalist to tank damage and protect his team by taking damage instead of his teammates. Crocodile is the Mage, contributing the most firepower and getting a damage boost just by being a crocodile, but few defensive options. The gazelle is the Thief, providing the team with support options and busts of healing for Naturalist himself.
• Mix-and-Match Critters: Hunted Naturalist's base power allows him to choose one of his three animal forms and trigger any effects that require him to be in that form until the end of his next turn. He can do this if he has one of his forms out, so he can temporarily assume two different forms.
• In the Hood: Hunted Naturalist sports a yellow-orange one.
• Poisonous Person: Crocodile Form lets Naturalist deal a fair amount of Toxic damage, which is a damage type not many heroes can deal.

Miss Information (Stand Alone)

When the Freedom Five was unable to save Aminia Twain from a threat, she should have died. But instead, she realized she was in a different dimension, one where her death had not happened yet. Using her knowledge of the heroes, she seeks revenge against them, especially towards the Freedom Five, for choosing civilians instead of their loyal assistant.

Miss Information is unique in that until her character cards are flipped, she is not a target and cannot be damaged. To reveal herself to the heroes and enable her to be attacked, the heroes must wait until enough of her Clue cards are put into play and survive her myriad Diversions.

Miss Information is set to appear in the upcoming 'Villains of the Multiverse' expansion, where she returns to continue her revenge against the Freedom Five.

• Arch-Enemy: Parse. While the Freedom Five are her arch enemies as well, it doesn't count for gameplay purposes.
• An Ice Person: Not Miss Information herself, but the '"Old Lady" In The Street' is a Cryo Shade that deals cold damage to the heroes while it is in play.
• Revenge: Miss Information's motivation is to get back at the Freedom Five, who didn't save her from imminent death.

Miss Information (Villains of the Multiverse)

When the hero Parse saw through Anima Twain's deception and realized she was Miss Information, the two battled at the Pike Industrial Complex. The battle ended with Miss Information being washed away in a wave of untested chemicals, and her body was unable to be found. Now, Miss Information has returned, seeking to complete her vengeance against the Freedom Five with her new powers to twist reality.

• Arch-Enemy: The Freedom Five - Legacy, Bunker, Wraith, Tachyon, and Absolute Zero.
• Reality Warper: Thanks to the chemicals that she got drenched in, Miss Information can twist reality, though how well she can control it remains to be seen.

edited 14th Dec '15 8:07:36 PM by Kingofsouls

I am a figment of your imagination

^

"Went from a CEO who's company". Who's is a contraction meaning "who is".

->whose

Plan to put this in Characters.Kamen Rider Agito.

• Swiss-Army Hero: Agito has three basic forms and three super forms, each shift and switch his combat ability on Multiform Balance, Elemental Powers, and Weapon Of Choice. The basic forms are Ground^note Unarmed, imbued with strength of earth, has lowest defense but highest attack power, Storm^note Faster and has better defense than Ground but weaker attack, armed with double-bladed Storm Halberd that can creat powerful gale, and Flame^note Has Super Sense and the best defense among basic forms, but is also the slowest. Stronger than Storm form but weaker than Ground form. Armed with Flame Saber which imbued with power of fire. The super forms are Trinity^note Combine the advantages of the basic forms and wield both weapons, Burning^note Channel his fighting spirit in to burning flame, it is stronger and has better defense than Trinity form but is much slower, armed with dual-bladed Shining Caliber, and Shining^note Awakened by expose Burning form to the light of the sun. As strong as Burning form but is also the fastest, armed with Shining Caliber separated into two blades.

I choose to use note mark-up to make the entry a little more tidy. Although it might be better to pothole tropes utilized by each form, it will be almost an All Blue Entry and I think those tropes should get separate entry anyway. Of course, it would be much easier to listed utilized tropes and has readers look up on the tropes entries, but we shouldn't do that, right?

edited 22nd Dec '15 7:56:42 PM by Kuruni

Assuming someone hadn't already added this to YMMV.Final Fantasy XIV That One Sidequest entry I would like to add it there. I just want to see if there are any issues with this.

• Remember the relic listed above? 3.15 introduced an equivalent version, the Anima Weapon. The 1st step being similar to the Zodiac Atma quest, but this time you need 18 of them. However it can be skipped by players who have the Zodiac Zeta weapon and can be done on any class this time. Getting it Awakened however, is just a simple marathon of 10 dungeons. The step after that however decided to hammer it into players' heads that they had grown too complacent with the nerfs to the previous relic chain and make up for it by requiring a large assortment of items, up to and including items that need to be crafted by specialist crafters (and as a result is liable to be expensive). The non crafted items also need a large amount of various currencies and are themselves needed in large quantities. The result being a grand total of 100 items needed for one single relic (and 96 of those being needed to trade for the other 4). And given the timetable for the patches, even with the first phase being skipped, the odds of getting the Anima weapon to a point where it is on par with the Gordean weapons before 3.2 are slim at best.

Well, I guess I should be the one to answer your question, especially after I told you to come here in the first place.

So:

• "Remember the relic listed above?": I think this counts as Word Cruft. I would advise you to remove that part.
• You are using no less than 3 "however" in the next 3 following sentences, there is also a case of bad punctuation right after the second one (no need for a ","), and a "step" can't "decide": However it can be skipped by players who have the Zodiac Zeta weapon and can be done on any class this time. Getting it Awakened however, is just a simple marathon of 10 dungeons. The step after that however decided to [...]". It is better to rewrite those sentences to avoid using "however" so much.

Example: "This step can be skipped by players who have the Zodiac Zeta weapon and can be done with any class this time. Getting it Awakened is just a simple marathon of 10 dungeons. However, the step after that hammers into players' heads that they have grown too complacent with the nerfs of the previous relic chain and make up for it by requiring a large assortment of items, up to and including items that need to be crafted by specialist crafters (and as a result is liable to be expensive).

• "The non crafted items": I think it should be written "the non-crafted items", but to be honest I'm unsure.

Aside from that, I think your example is good.

Okay then. How's this:

• 3.15 introduced an equivalent version to the Relic Questline, the Anima Weapon. The 1st step being similar to the Zodiac Atma quest, but this time you need 18 of them. This step can be skipped by players who have the Zodiac Zeta weapon and can be done with any class this time. Once you done that and got the i170 weapon, then getting it Awakened is just a simple marathon of 10 dungeons. But the step after that hammers it into players' heads that they had grown too complacent with the nerfs to the previous relic chain and make up for it by requiring a large assortment of items, up to and including items that need to be crafted by specialist crafters (and as a result is liable to be expensive). The non-crafted items also need a large amount of various currencies and are themselves needed in large quantities. The result being a grand total of 100 items needed for one single relic (and 96 of those being needed to trade for the other 4). And given the timetable for the patches, even with the first phase being skipped, the odds of getting the Anima weapon to a point where it is on par with the Gordian weapons before 3.2 are slim at best.

Minor corrections:

"Once you have done that and got the i170 weapon, getting it Awakened is a simple marathon of 10 dungeons." (removing "just", since it is rather superfluous if you mention that the marathon is simple).

Also: "But the step after that hammers into players' heads that they have grown too complacent with the nerfs to the previous relic chain and make up for it by requiring a large assortment of items, up to and including items that need to be crafted by specialist crafters (and as a result are liable to be expensive)."

Please see Useful Notes: Tenses. The crafted items are multiple, therefore they "are" liable to be expensive (not "is").

edited 18th Dec '15 4:00:48 PM by NonoRobot