Although set up as a very bleak Tear Jerker of a movie, Logan is not without its funny moments.
- Charles spitefully sticking his tongue out to show Logan proof he swallowed the pills.
- Pretty much any time Laura throws a childish tantrum. Well, any time it's not a Moment of Awesome.
- Laura rifles through a convenience store for food and a pair of sunglasses, opening and eating the food before buying it. When confronted by the clerk about this, she promptly throws him to the floor and pops her claws. Logan stops her from killing him and scolds her... before shoplifting a battery charger and a couple cigars.Logan: NOT. OKAY.
- It's not even his typical "Wolverine rage" shouting, this is his Dad Voice.
- Laura is so fond of the sunglasses that she keeps them for much of the film.◊
- Before Logan takes the cigars, he takes a moment to apologize to the poor guy, as he is the only character in the film who was attacked by Laura but didn't deserve it. And then politely asks him where the chargers are. The man sheepishly points to them as Logan takes one plus a cigar and then drags Laura outside. Without paying for anything.
- Pierce scolding her like a misbehaving puppy when the trailer reveals her claws.
- Xavier bitching about how Logan is running him and Laura ragged while on the run. Just having Professor Xavier again do a Precision F-Strike is hilarious.Xavier: Two days on the road, only one meal and hardly any sleep. She's eleven, I'm fucking 90.
Logan: That's 101 reasons to keep moving.
- There's also something inherently hilarious about seeing sweet, gentlemanly Patrick Stewart drop the f-bomb.
- And it's throughout the movie. The way Xavier and Logan snark at each other like they've had the same "tired of your shit" arguments for a long time.
- Logan's reaction to X-23 opening a can of whoop-ass on Pierce and his mooks.Logan: (subdued) Holy shit!
- Charles and Logan regarding Laura:Charles: She can learn to be better.
Logan: Better than me?
Charles: Actually... yes.
- In the otherwise melancholic "Sunseeker", this gem manages to crop up.Logan: No paperwork. I'm not a big fan of paperwork.
- There's also the Freeze-Frame Bonus of Logan flipping the bird to another unseen driver.
- Laura riding on a CoinOp horse, and popping her claws in anger when the time runs out and it stops. Logan catches her hand before she can take out her frustrations on the ride, and puts another coin in the machine.Logan: Last ride. You're welcome.
- Her anger at the horse stopping is funnier when you see how blank her expression is when it is in operation.
- Logan wearing reading glasses. And Charles's comment, as well as Logan's "really?" expression to this sells it:Charles: I like those. They make you look younger.
- Logan frustratingly tells Charles to stop talking when he starts to talk about their past. Turns out what Charles really wanted to say is that he really, really needs to pee. Cue Logan awkwardly trying to help Charles to relieve himself in the gas station restroom, with Charles wailing that he can help himself all the while.
- When Laura finally talks. Logan is surprised... and then she starts going off in shrill, rapid Spanish until he finally yells at her to shut the fuck up. The fact they seem to understand each other speaking different languages (with both of them swearing, nonetheless!) helps the hilarity. It gets even better: She switches to English and demands Logan finish taking her to Eden. When he refuses and begins venting about the comics being a load of bull, she punches him in the face. Twice.Logan: (while restraining Laura's arm) Don't fucking hit me! Don't hit me!
"Alright, we'll go to fuckin' Fantasyland..."
- The rant is even funnier if you speak Spanish, because Laura is actually chewing his ass out for how he'd been treating her to that point of the film, and that's why she hadn't talked to that point.
- When Logan finally caves in to her demands:
- Logan at the beginning being extremely worried about any damage to his Chrysler 2024 limo due to his job as a driver and low funds, to the point he'll even take gunshots just to avoid them hitting the car.
- Then, in his berserker rage, Logan cuts off one of the hands of the carjacker who's holding a shotgun. Said shotgun promptly fires into the door panel.
Pierce: You know you got some buckshot in your door.
- During the first encounter with Pierce afterwards, he dryly notes the condition of the limo.
- A couple more just from Logan's fares:
- One is a group of plastered women holding a bachelorette party. The bride proceeds to flash him. Even more amusingly, Logan seems to enjoy it.
- We also see Logan driving what appears to be a group of frat boys in suits screaming "USA! USA!" Then we cut to an exterior shot of the limo and we see that Logan is indeed driving them into the States while they mockingly yell at border patrol.
- Logan helps out Will Munson by not only disarming some goons who are shaking him down for water, but shattering one of their guns over his knee. You can see Will in the background looking at this feat with an expression that screams, "Who the hell did we let in our home?"
- After Logan and Laura make it to Eden, the other mutant children prank Logan in his sleep by trimming his beard into his signature sideburns. He wakes up and is not amused as the children are all giggling.Logan: (looks in mirror and turns back to kids) That's not funny!
- Though the circumstances behind it are tragic, the fact that Xavier is high off his ass for pretty much the entire movie is chuckle-worthy. The nonsense he spews in his first scene alone before getting injected is hilarious!Xavier: THE NEW QUESALUPA FROM TACO BELL!!!
- "So, they was thinking [that the carjackers were killed by] either an escaped tiger or Freddy Krueger. But neither one of them can drive; one being fictional, the other one extinct."
- Pretty much any scene where the X-Men comics are brought up, specially when Wolverine finds the coordinates to Eden and says "You've got to be fucking kidding me!"
- Logan at one point introducing Xavier as his father, "Chuck."
- Several from Laura that pretty much every parent in the audience could relate to:
- What's the first thing Laura does when she, Logan, and Charles get on the elevator at the casino? Pushing all the floor buttons. When he restrains her, he's clearly putting in even more effort than when he was stopping her from killing that store clerk earlier.
- After escaping the hotel and making their way north in the used truck Logan bought, Laura starts playing with the power door locks. When Logan gets annoyed and tells her to knock it off, she not only keeps at it, but stares right at him, as if she's daring him to make her stop.
- Pierce's first meeting with Logan has him mocking and threatening him by revealing he knows Logan is taking care of Xavier somewhere in Mexico. Then when he leaves:Pierce (sheepishly): I'm a fan, by the way...
- Logan then reads the business card Pierce casually flicked at him... and then he recognizes a certain name written on it...
- While the discovery of the Adamantium Bullet is mainly tear-jerking in its implications, this line by Caliban pushes it well into the realm of Black Comedy:Caliban: If you are planning to blow your brains out, could you wait 'till you're out on the high seas? I've just mopped these floors.
- When Laura is eating dinner, it quickly becomes clear that she has absolutely no idea how normal people eat. She tries to take all the food instead of passing the bowl on, eats mashed potatoes with her hands, and when Logan gives her a fork, she holds it like a knife and uses it like a skewer, eating the food while it's still speared by the fork.
- When Logan and Charles are telling the Munsons about Charles' school, they both admit that Logan was a terrible student. Even Laura finds it funny.
- Especially as Charles just called it a 'special needs' school.
- After the sad scene of Xavier being buried, Mood Whiplash kicks in as the pickup truck refuses to start and Logan repeatedly bashes it in frustration with the shovel.
- When Logan gets out of the Emergency Care Clinic Laura took him to, only to find that she stole a car to get him there:Logan (as he gets behind the wheel): You can't just take shit.
- Logan comes to strapped to a stretcher being raised on a rope up a cliff. The instant he realizes this, he very quickly moves his limbs as close to his body as he can.
- Laura nonchalantly eating her cereal while Donald's men come and try and take her in. The look on her face really sells the moment.
- When Logan confronts the thugs at the beginning of the film, and explains that they're just going to strip the lugs because of the chrome plating, one of them gives him a sarcastic "Yeah?"
- After a rather tense face off with Pierce, Laura throws a pipe at him off-screen and knocks him right out.
- Following this, in response to Caliban's question about what might happen if Pierce wakes up before he dumps him somewhere Logan kicks him to make sure he's doubly knocked out.
- In a deleted scene where the heroes are pulled over for speeding, Logan tells Laura, "I need you to please try not to kill this lady, okay?"
- It's funny in a dark sense, but when Logan confronts Zander Rice at the end, Xander introduces himself by saying his father worked on the Weapon X project. Logan calls him "the asshole who put [adamantium] into me," and Rice confirms. Logan then says he thinks he might have killed him, and Rice again sheepishly confirms this, looking almost embarrassed. Logan's body language and tone suggest he's genuinely trying to remember and can't think of the specifics, but he decides that all things considered, it's pretty good odds he did kill him.
- An anecdote about Dafne Keen's on-set antics by Hugh Jackman in an interview with Empire brings us this gem:In one intense scene, as Jackman recalled to us, Logan loses his temper at Laura. I just yelled, SHUT THE FUCK UP! Jackman says. At the end of 40 minutes of this I went up to Maria, Dafnes mum, and I said, Maria, Ive got an 11-year-old and Im just really sorry. Maria said, Aw, dont worry, she just called you a cunt. In Spanish."
- This video, which depicts Logan's fights against X-24 as a UFC-style match.Announcer 1 (Craven): Let's check in on the corner of X-24 and see how they're doing.Announcer 2 (Zak): His Cut-Man has definitely got a lot of work-[Beat]Craven: Were you gonna say "cut out for him"?Zak: I was, Craven, but it's redundant and I hesitated, which you picked up on right away.
- From this Q&A session:Question: Compared to the other times you've played him, what makes playing Professor X in 'Logan' so special for you?Sir Patrick Stewart: Oh, this is so easy. I get carried in his (Jackman's) arms for significant portions of the movie.
- One piece of viral marketing for the movie was Crushing Adamantium with Hydraulic Press on the Hydraulic Press Channel."Vat tha fock?"