Shardpoint Academy Characters
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Player Characters
Sophia Magdelene
Played By: Austin Yorski
A tabaxi fighter and professor of Anthropology at Shardpoint Academy. Kind of a hippy. Sophia's DnD Beyond Sheet
- Bunny-Ears Lawyer: Despite a previous career in anthropology, what little professionalism she still has is only due to her lack of tenure.
- Cuteness Proximity: Any semblance of dignity goes out the window when she sees Orryn's pet weasel.
- The second one-shot has the weasel delivering messages to people around the school. Orryn didn't bother sending one to Sophia since he knew she'd chase after it of her own accord.
- Expy: According to Austin, Sophia is just a humanoid version of Luna from Sailor Moon.
Palanthur "Scoops" Frustre
Played By: Johnny Maloney
A halfling bard and student at Shardpoint Academy. Also a journalist who thinks the guidebooks to the Dice Funk universe are outdated, and thinks he's the one to update them. Palanthur's DnD Beyond Sheet
- Catchphrase: "People have a right to know..."
- Intrepid Reporter: Of the 1920s muckraker variety.
- Totally Radical: He almost constantly speaks in slang from the early 20th century.
Merlos
Played By: Jess Kitrick
A half-elf monk and student at Shardpoint Academy. Spends most of his time flexing. Merlos's DnD Beyond Sheet
- The Quiet One: Mostly because he spends his time posing in front of any reflective surface.
- Walking Shirtless Scene: He doesn't like shirts because they hide his muscles. Even a muscle shirt is too concealing for his tastes.
Danamin
Played By: Nik Freeman
A centaur ranger, interplanar traveller, and temporary professor of Cultures and Traveling at Shardpoint Academy. Danamin's DnD Beyond Sheet
- Amazing Technicolor Population: His coat is near-blue, reflecting his extraplanar origin.
- Another Dimension: He comes from a different plane.
- Antiquated Linguistics: It's less his word choice and more his manner of speech. He calls the headmaster 'Lord Waite' and treats him with an overabundance of respect, and takes even unimportant matters completely seriously.
- Dude, Where's My Respect?: The reason he was sent to find the Tome of Location with everyone else is because professors have to fulfill requirements to be considered an 'adventurer' by all nations affiliated with Shardpoint Academy. Apparently, Akamoros doesn't recognize heroism, rescuing individuals in distress, or brokering peace between longstanding enemy factions as 'adventures'.
- O.O.C. Is Serious Business: After talking to Irving he breaks his overly formal character to insult him. The others are surprised by this sudden change in mannerisms.
- The Rival: To Irving, a floating talking horse's head.
Gregor Trueblade
Played By: Mike Chindamo
A human barbarian and professor at Shardpoint Academy, teaching Outdoorsmanship and Survival in Urban, Civic, and Wilderness Environments. He's made a poor transition from mountain man to teacher. Thinks anything could be a mimic.- Cool Teacher: His students say that he barely teaches them anything, usually branching off into one of his stories, but also notes that they always enjoy his classes despite the lack of practical teaching.
- Cutting the Knot: At one point his method to disarm a path full of traps is to simply walk through it, setting off the traps and taking whatever damage comes his way. He only loses 4 HP.
- Establishing Character Moment: When Orryn sends for him he's in his office, punching a potted plant he suspects of being a mimic.
- The Gunslinger: Not that he uses it, but the homebrew class he's using (path of the mountain man) grants hunting rifle proficiency. He thinks of it as a club with ranged capability.
- The Münchausen: Just about anything can remind him of one of his adventures. His stories will often end up having little to do with whatever point he was trying to make.
- The Paranoiac: A surprisingly casual one. He's convinced that anything could have hidden security measures (especially mimics) and has bear traps placed around his office. He also seems confident that he can handle any that come up.
Fizzle Trink Mudgrove
Played By: Tom White
A gnomish rogue and student at Shardpoint Academy. He's good at getting into places he shouldn't be, like the restricted section of the library.- The Sneaky Guy: He's introduced reading through a stack of books in the restricted section of the school library. He also acts as scout and tries to sneak, although his attempts at subtlety are usually undermined by his teammates.
Sephora
Played By: Austin Yorski
An aasimar druid and zoology professor at Shardpoint Academy. Her -1 to Intelligence means she's not the brightest, but this is countered somewhat by her 20 in Wisdom.- Foil: She was specifically designed so Austin could avoid overusing Sophia's weasel obsession and obvious attraction to Meldamere. Sephora ignores the weasel and is notably blunt to Meldamere.
- Sink or Swim Mentor: When the jackalope she brought to class escapes she changes the lesson plan to 'catch the jackalope'. Whoever catches it gets an A, everyone else fails.
- Voluntary Shapeshifter: As a druid. She turns into an alligator at one point and refuses to change back until communication becomes enough of a problem.
Toow Bifor
Played By: Jane Aerith Magnet
A rock gnome bard and student at Shardpoint Academy. Technically in the engineering program, but would rather play music and regularly sneaks into bard classes.- Fantasy-Forbidding Father: Toow's father contacts the school, concerned with which classes the credits are from. Apparently, he'd rather Toow become an engineer despite a lack of skill or interest in the subject.
- Noodle Incident: There are a couple of mentions of the school finding out about 'that fire in the student bar' which are never elaborated on.
- Punny Name: Two by four. Additionally, a Rock Gnome and a bard.
Torgwyn, a.k.a. Whoosh
Played By: Laura Kate Dale
A hill dwarf cleric and student at Shardpoint Academy. Since the gods are dead, Torgwyn's been trying to figure out where their cleric powers are still coming from. Their current theory is 'the wind' and wants to speak with it.- Cloud Cuckoo Lander: They somehow came to the conclusion that, in the absence of the gods, their cleric powers come from the wind. They've since been trying to intuit how to speak to it.
- Magical Accessory: They walk around on stilts enchanted to produce a smoke effect to make it look like they're walking on clouds.
- Self-Applied Nickname: In order to better relate to the wind, they've come up with the nickname 'Whoosh'.
- Why Didn't I Think of That?: When it's pointed out that Shardpoint has classes in the language of the element of air, Torgwyn wonders why they were trying to learn the sounds of the wind as a language in the first place.
- Wizard Beard: They have a white beard, bushy enough to resemble a cloud.
Arvaad Ironscale
Played By: Peter Bowman
A silver dragonborn sorcerer and head(?) librarian at Shardpoint Academy.- Encyclopaedic Knowledge: He seems to have read every book in his library and one of his character traits allows him to retain all information he's come across in the previous two weeks.
- Hidden Depths: In contrast to how he tends to act in person, he's actually a pretty good public speaker so long as he's had time to prepare what he's going to say.
- I Meant to Do That: After the team kills the icosahydra, Arvaad pretends the whole fight had been Shardpoint's presentation on combating extraplanar entities.
- Magic Librarian: A librarian and a sorcerer. Unlike most iterations of the trope, however, the two parts are unrelated; Ironscale is simply a librarian whose personal hobby is sorcery, and he considers himself a librarian first.
- Oblivious to Hatred: He genuinely doesn't realize that Garvel hates him and in fact respects his intelligence and commitment to library sciences. Even after seeing that Rockedge's presentations are stolen from Shardpoint's, he only thinks Garvel's teammates were plagiarizing, not being able to bring himself to cast aspersions on a fellow librarian.
- The Smart Guy: Played with. He's consistently been top of the class in the numerous library science programs he's attended and studies the books in his own library, but he's not actually all that intelligent; rather, he has an excellent memory and charisma, which means he has a lot of knowledge off the top of his head and comes off as smarter than he really is.
Coltash
Played By: Word on the Wind
A kalashtar fighter, meaning they're made up of a human woman named Col and a quori man named Tash. They teach Supremely Elegant Gunplay and Usability Elegance at Shardpoint.- Bond Creatures: Like all kalashtar, they're a human bonded with a quori. When they get to the convention Tash requests they get separate identification lanyards.
- The Gunslinger: As per the class they teach. They specialize in pistols, which is part of their rivalry with the rifle-focused Smith Wessington.
- Pronoun Trouble: Since the only visible part of their being is Col, a human woman, people who don't know better assume Coltash is female and refer to them as 'Colt'. This frequently irritates Tash.
- The Rival: Smith Wessington. Sources of friction include Wessington consistently calling Coltash 'Colt' and Coltash's specialization in pistols versus Wessington's specialization in rifles.
Academy Inhabitants
Orryn Waite
A gnome who became headmaster of Shardpoint Academy through suspicious circumstances.
- Benevolent Boss: Despite his overwhelming shadiness, he frequently sets up teams on assignments tailored to ensure their members are able to continue attending or working at Shardpoint while also accomplishing his own goals.
- The Chessmaster: He's incredibly familiar with the legal systems of multiple countries and the Academy itself, and put together the quest for the Tome of Location to resolve four different legal issues and further his own goals all in one stroke. Not to mention how he got to be headmaster with absolutely no screening or confirmation.
- Exact Words: The transfer of the Shardpoint Academy headmaster position has traditionally involved a lengthy confirmation process, ended by the new headmaster signing the papers to legally take over. Orryn apparently skipped the confirmation. He found out that the only action this process actually required was signing the papers. So he stole them and put down his signature.
- Familiar: Jamerious Jenkins Jollygood, abbreviated to JJJ, a weasel in a fancy vest and Waite's familiar. JJJ is often taken along on missions for moral support, although it's pretty clear that Waite is using his presence to magically keep tabs on the current retrieval group.
- The Team Benefactor: In his position as headmaster and interest in studying magical items, he delegates who goes out looking for what. In addition, he has reasons for setting up each team, usually to help them get required credits or secure their position at the school.
Esprit Blade/Roger
A sentient sword and the second of Orryn's objectives.
- Cool Sword: Comes with being a snarky talking weapon.
- In-Universe Nickname: Orryn calls him Raj.
- I Shall Taunt You: His sentience is only part of his main purpose; to be a sword that can banter with opponents at any given moment.
- Magic-Powered Pseudoscience: Torgwyn asks him how he generates sound if he's solid metal. Roger admits that he's never actually thought about how that works, but chalks it up to magic.
- Mundane Utility: He takes a job as a teacher after getting to Shardpoint. They even build him a stand so he can address the class.
- Talking Sword: How else would he insult people?
Meldamere Valamin
An Eladrin descendant of those Valamins. Works as a professor at Shardpoint.
- Dump Stat: She's quite competent at her own job, but when she has to substitute for Sephora's zoology class she accidentally releases venomous centipedes all over her desk.
- Heroic Lineage: She's descended from the Valamin family, the same ones who've been heavily involved in three separate seasons of Dice Funk and probably still have importance in the background.
Lee Oupan
An elderly (27 year old) Aarakocra working at Shardpoint.
- Proportional Aging: Aarakocra age faster than humans. Lee's been alive 27 years, so he looks and acts like he's of advanced age.
Rockedge Institute
Smith Wessington
A well-dressed old west looking man who teaches at Rockedge Institute.
- Bizarre and Improbable Ballistics: His presentation involves shooting through planes to hit targets he's not aiming anywhere near. Coltash is convinced he just has a second shooter hitting the targets for him.
- The Gunslinger: He specializes in rifles and dresses like a wealthy man from the old west.
- Nice Job Fixing It, Villain: After hitting a target that had been enchanted with armor, he breaks the Planar Icosahedron. When he tries to fix it he instead causes a twenty-headed hydra to attack the crowd, giving the Shardpoint team the perfect opening to very publicly save the day.
- Punny Name: Like Smith & Wesson, the gun manufacturer.
- The Rival: To Coltash, apparently primarily due to their conflicting gunplay disciplines.
Irving
A floating talking horse's head who teaches at Rockedge Institute.
- Anything You Can Do, I Can Do Better: While all of Rockedge's presentations follow this theme, Irving's is the most blatant. Danamin's presentation is navigating by the stars in his home plane; Irving's presentation is navigating by the stars in any plane.
- Fight Unscene: After killing the icosahydra, Danamin starts chasing Irving who attempts to leave. The next time we see Danamin he's smiling and holding a tuft of yanked-out mane in his hand.
- Flying Face: He's a floating horse's head.
- The Rival: To Danamin.
Garvel
A brass dragonborn and master librarian at Rockedge Institute.
- Berserk Button: Arvaad, who he's held a grudge against since vocational school.
- Teeth-Clenched Teamwork: He helps Arvaad fix the Icosahedron, all the while angrily grumbling about it. Keep in mind this is completely one-sided as Arvaad still doesn't realize Garvel hates him.
- Unknown Rival: To Arvaad, who he thinks stole his spot as valedictorian of their class. Arvaad, for his part, thinks Garvel did exceptionally well by making salutatorian and has no idea that he considers him an enemy.
Aeolipile Shtap
Halfing headmaster of the Rockedge Institute.
- Familiar: Sam, a ferret and service familiar. If he's anything like JJJ he has some hidden properties.
- Hidden Villain: He steals the Planar Icosahedron so the Rockedge team can win the presentation contest and is therefore effectively responsible for the central conflict. While he shows up in the middle of the episode, his involvement isn't known until after the Shardpoint team has already won.
- The Rival: To Orryn Waite. They were once colleagues, and still pursue the same goal of acquiring magical artifacts, but Shtap wants to use them while Waite would rather study them in a safe environment.
