Funny: Arthur

PBS Kids Television Series:

Arthur is one of those rare cartoons that manages to be kid friendly, yet bubbling underneath, it has a wicked sense of humor. It's not surprising that there are so many examples in the children's series section.

  • In general, when D.W. isn't being a Bratty Half-Pint or causing people to bang their head against the wall, she is a walking CMoF most of the time. Case in point, every one of her lines from "Arthur the Wrecker", where she repeatedly worries about Mom getting mad at her and Arthur for accidentally breaking her computer.
  • The fricking dang whole "Crazy Bus" song!
  • Fern's title card, which simply shows her silently scribbling out a story on her desk, compared to the more "exciting" title cards of the other characters. Fits perfectly with her introverted personality.
  • From S1's "Arthur and the Real Mr. Ratburn:"
    Buster: Arthur, we have to choose: face horrifying scary danger...or do our homework.
    Arthur and Francine: HORRIFYING SCARY DANGER!
  • The Aardvark Rap. What makes it funnier is Arthur's dance, culminating in the "Arthur Roll", where his dad joins in. (His dad also joins in the rap.)
    "A-A-R-D-V-A-R-K!"
  • The moment at the start of "D.W.'s Imaginary Friend" when Dad accidentally throws a bowl of salad at Arthur and it's about to land on him when all of a sudden it freezes in mid-air.
  • In "Francine Frensky, Superstar", Francine gets the lead in the school play about Thomas Edison and quickly lets her "stardom" go to her head. After Arthur fails to talk some sense into her, the kids retaliate by sabotaging the dress rehearsal, which is spectated by the kindergarteners. The performance includes Arthur the phonograph reciting automated telephone messages, Buster the light bulb spraying Francine with water, and ends with everyone kicking their legs in a chorus line as Francine gets chased by the closing curtain, all with the kindergarten audience in hysterics.
  • S1's "Arthur's Cousin Catastrophe" is full of wonderful bits in-between the actual story (Arthur's trying to avoid his cousin Mo at a family reunion), but probably the best ones revolve around his Uncle Seannote  who's an unsuccessful writer and somewhat of a snooty academician (and proto-hipster) to boot.
    Uncle Sean: My latest project is an original mystery. It's about a man haunted by his past, on the run from a dreaded enemy. He's hunted everywhere he goes. It seems like there's no escape!
    Great-Grandma: Oh! You mean like The Fugitive? Or Les MisÚrables? Or just like The 39 Step-
    Grandma Thora: Mother!
    Uncle Sean: (stammering) Well, uh, yes, but completely different!
    • And later, the same uncle is playing charades, and his turn lasts half an hour, and all anyone can guess is that it has to do with bridges. He finally gives up and says:
    D.W.: [after Sean falls over] "London Bridge Is Falling Down"?
    Uncle Sean: Honestly! On The Bridges of Medieval Paris. A record of early 14th-century life by Virginia Wylie Eggbert!
    (Everyone groans)
    Aunt Bonnienote : We said, "Pick a popular book."
    Uncle Sean: Well, all my friends have read it!
  • At the end of "Arthur's Birthday", no one can break the pinata. Mr. Read decides to give it a try, but also fails. Determined, he hits it with a hammer, but still nothing. Finally, when everybody else is enjoying the party inside, Mr. Read has taken the pinata outside, while revving up a chainsaw.
  • "D.W.'s Baby": When D.W. is trying to get Kate in trouble, because of jealousy.
    Dad: GAH! How did my new shoes get in the dishwasher!?
    D.W.: Kate did it! I SAW HER.
    Dad: (beat) D.W., go to your room and think about what you just told me.
  • The increasingly crazy rewrites in "Arthur Writes A Story."
  • Arthur trying to wheedle his way out of a family vacation.
    Arthur: If I'm old enough to take out the trash, aren't I old enough to choose my own vacation?
    Jane: You didn't really think that was gonna work, did you?
    Arthur: It was worth a try, wasn't it?
    Jane: That's an idea, though...
    (Arthur gasps and looks up hopefully)
    Jane: You could take out the trash!
    Arthur: Aw!
  • In "Arthur's Chicken Pox", D.W. is sitting on the couch playing with a toy telephone when an advertisement comes on the TV saying "pick up the phone. That one right there on the couch. Order this Genuine Imitation Leather Cowbell."
    • The part after Grandma Thora tells Arthur's birth story and D.W.'s already extremely jealous of the attention Arthur's getting for his chicken pox.
    D.W.: What about when I was born?
    Grandma Thora: I think I was in Florida then.
  • In "Sick as a Dog", Pal steals D.W.'s hot dog. She was holding it below her waist, and her voice actor is a boy.
    D.W.: The dog's got my weiner! The dog's got my weiner!
  • In 'Arthur's Almost Boring Day', a bored Arthur and D.W. are stuck inside the house and can't go to the park because of rain, and so they are are told to draw pictures as an activity:
    D.W.: What did you draw?
    Arthur: (holds up drawing of a dog) A dog, and he's bored. What did you draw?
    D.W.: (holds up drawing of a straight line) A stick.
    Arthur: (incredulous) A stick?!
    D.W.: (sudden outburst) A stick from the park where you PROMISED TO TAKE ME TODAY!!!
    • Also, this:
    Grandma Thora: I was just starting on (cleaning the attic) when your dad begged me to - um, when I decided to invite you over!
  • When D.W. is investigating who took her snowball in "D.W.'s Snow Mystery", she is told to recall what happened just before it got stolen. She remembers Grandma Thora came over, and proceeds to tell the story as if Grandma Thora favored her over Arthur. Arthur obviously contests this, and it sounds almost convincing...and then he adds in a bit where Grandma Thora says about D.W. "Give me some aspirin, she's giving me a splitting headache!" Grandma Thora recalls both of them as angelic children, but the best account has to be Mrs. Read's — she imagines them making crazy noises and horseplaying up to the front door. It has to be seen.
  • In S1's "D.W. Gets Lost", the public address system is a fountain of hilarity:
    "Welcome to All-in-One Mart! The store big enough to swallow your town!"
    "All-in-One Mart values all our customers. But if you break something, you bought it. Tough luck!"
    "Today's special in our sportswear department: pre-worn sneakers for lazy people."
    "If you've lost your child, come to our lost child department. Located behind the toy department. And on the way, why not buy a new toy for that poor, frightened child that you lost?!"
    "Attention all shoppers: free samples all day at our water fountain."
    "Big sale in our book department: books without vowels now half price!"
    "Who needs expensive air conditioning when army surplus jet turbines are on sale in our wind department?"
    "Who doesn't like the satisfying flavour of fresh, warm carbonated milk? The late night drink that lulls you to sleep and burps you, too!"
    "Don't forget today's sale on chocolate-covered cabbage. It's the dessert that makes you go 'Blecch!'"
    "Right now in our free sample department, everything is half price."
  • S1's "Arthur's Substitute Teacher Trouble" has two similar funny moments:
    • Near the beginning of the episode, Mr. Haney delivers the news to Arthur's class that Mr. Ratburn has laryngitis and will be out for the rest of the week. As soon as he leaves the room, the entire class begins cheering; Mr. Haney opens the door again and glares at them, and they immediately fall silent and try (unsuccessfully) to look innocent and absorbed in work.
    • At the end of the episode, when Mr. Ratburn returns early, the students, having been driven almost insane by the mind-numbingly easy work given to them by Mr. Ratburn's sister, begin cheering, complete with flag-waving and hat-tossing (said hats including a top hat, a straw hat, and a graduation cap).
  • Arthur's Painful Rhyme in "I'm A Poet":
    Listen, my children
    As I tell you
    About a duck and a chicken
    on a bus to Oklahomoo
    • There's also Binky's Poem:
    People think I can't write a poem
    But they are so wrong! I can write a poem!
    I wrote this one, I wrote this poem...
    And I gave it the title BINKY'S POEM! So shut up!
  • In "Draw!", Ms. Sweetwater follows Ms. Tingley throughout the school, playing her guitar and singing to cheer her up.
    • The "The Giant Slime Who Came to School" comic, especially when Buster eats said giant slime mistaking it for lime.
  • This rather infamous scene from "D.W. the Picky Eater":
    D.W.: (picking up undesirables from her salad) Cucumbers, yucky. Mushrooms, yucky. Onions, yucky AND smelly. Hey....this isn't lettuce! What kind of a salad IS this?!?!
    Arthur: (looking at the audience) .....uh-oh, she's gonna pop!
    D.W.: This is SPINACH!
    Waiter: IIIIIIiiis something the matter?
    D.W.: This is spinach.....and I! HATE!!! SPINACH!!!!!! (she repeatedly bangs her fists on the table and then her fork pushes down on her plate and sends the bowl on it in the air, landing on the waiter's head)
    Crowd: (gasps)
    (Beat)
    D.W.: Uh-ooooooooh......!
    Waiter: THAT'S IT, I QUIT!
    Jane: (bracingly) Dora! Winifred! Read!
  • In "Arthur Makes a Movie", where the gang tries to make a James Bond-ish type movie, they shoot a scene in the library where The Brain ("IQ") is pretending to put in a code to stop a missile. He's typing at a library computer with Arthur ("James Hound").
    Arthur: You've got to hurry up, IQ! The missile will hit in ten seconds!
    Camera pans to librarian at desk
    Librarian: I don't know what's wrong, Ms. Turner. The computer won't let me check out these books!
    Ms. Turner: I guess we'll just have to do it by hand.
    Back to the kids
    The Brain: According to my calculations, the last digit should be a 1 or a 2. But which is it? 1 or a 2?
    He presses a button, and then all the lights go out.
    Arthur: ...I guess it was a 2.
    • And later in the episode, it shows Brain trying to fix the lights, with Buster being very unhelpful.
    The Brain (from inside a closet): There! Did that make the lights go on?
    Buster: I don't know, it's too dark to tell! Get it? (bursts out laughing) Too DARK to tell? (notices Brain giving him a Death Glare) No, still off, keep trying!
  • Arthur getting knocked on the head with a basketball in "Play It Again, D.W."
  • In "D.W. Goes to Washington," D.W. gets lost and when speaking to the secret service agents, Mom and Dad for some reason are unable to come up with "Dora Winifred" and just tell them "D.W."
    Secret Service Agent: That's it? Initials? Didn't you give the kid a whole name?
  • Arthur imagining that D.W.'s vacation choice would be to "Ponyland" in "D.W.'s Deer Friend". He is sitting in a chair surrounded by kids and ponies dancing in a circle singing the Ponyland theme over and over.
    Arthur: MY BRAAAIN IS MEEELTING!!
  • From "Arthur's Knee":
    D.W.: Then I can give Arthur his Tetris booster!
  • In "D.W's Very Bad Mood," Arthur tells his friends at school that the previous night, D.W. slammed so many doors he thought the family would get arrested. Cut to an Imagine Spot of a show titled Tantrum 911, where a SWAT team is called in to deal with D.W.; she begins throwing a tantrum as they try to read her rights. When the spot is over, Binky says in awe, "Cool! When is that gonna be on?"
    • "Arthur is a dodo brain!"
  • Arthur's chant in D.W.'s dream in "D.W.'s Name Game".
    "DORA WINIFRED!! DORA WINIFRED!!"
  • Binky's obsession with bananas in "How the Cookie Crumbles".
  • In "Sue Ellen's Little Sister", Sue Ellen gets SO bored by Arthur looking at his trading cards that she lets out the funniest snore ever.
  • From "The Ballad of Buster Baxter" where Art Garfunkel has a guest appearance. He follows Buster and his friends around, singing songs and strumming his guitar, acting somewhat like a Greek chorus. No one seems to notice him, until one scene in particular, which shows Buster watching TV in his chair, feeling depressed because he believes his friends have changed while he was away. Then Art Garfunkel pops in...
    Art: (singing cheerfully) "He's a sad, sad bunny! A sad, sad bunny! TV isn't funny when you're a sad, sad, bunny!" Yee-haw!
    Buster: Hey! That's not very sad music!
    (beat)
    Art: (singing slowly and sadly) "He's a sad, sad, bunny... a sad, sad, sad, sad, bunny..."
    • And the ending:
    Arthur: Moooommmm! There's a singing moose in front of the house!
  • Basically all the meta-jokes in "And Now Let's Talk to Some Kids" (not to be confused with "And Now, a Word from Us Kids", the recurring segment that plays at the halfway point of each episode).
    Every day when you're walking down the street... you stop and think. [Cue Brain thinking, cut to Brain's title card]
    Buster: Hey! (It looks like we're looking at the end of the opening, this time with Buster sitting in the circle, until he eventually falls out of the TV)
    D.W.: I knew there were little people in the TV! Moooooom!
  • The season 5 episode "Revenge of the Chip" ends with a priceless look on Molly's face when Binky bites into her potato chip costume.
  • In "Dad's Dessert Dilemma" there's Ratburn's increasingly flimsy excuse of "I thought you might like the spring reading list- oh are you having cake?" culminating in him randomly showing up at Arthur's house for it.
    • In the episode's intro, David greets the audience and tries to call for Arthur.
    David: Oh hello, are you looking for Arthur? Arthur! He must be doing his homework. (scene cuts to Arthur in the kitchen stuffing his face full of cookies)
    • David proceeds to tell the audience about his "misunderstood experiments" all of which result in Arthur and D.W. going "bleah"!
  • "Mom and Dad Have a Great Big Fight", Arthur and D.W. fear their parents may be getting a divorce and worry that they will be abandoned. Cue Oliver Twist-inspired Imagine Spot.
    Arthur: We have to avoid going to an orphanage at all costs, especially one set in the 1800's.
    • From the same episode, D.W. gives us what is quite possibly the greatest comeback ever.
    D.W.: You...You wear glasses!
    • To which Arthur retorts with,
    Arthur: Mom and Dad are not fighting because I wear glasses.
  • Towards the opening of "D.W.'s Library Card", D.W. is with Binky at a table in the library and he's reading to her from a biography about Frederic Chopin, the famous romantic composer. Arthur approaches, telling her to quit bothering Binky, and D.W. objects, saying that Binky was reading to her about Chopin. Binky quickly covers the biography with a book featuring a cover with a picture of a guy doing a karate kick and says that he was reading about "Choppin'", a karate master. Arthur leads D.W. away and Binky goes back to reading his Chopin biography.
  • "Arthur's Big Hit"
    Binky: (pacing around outside the bathroom)
    Brain: (walks out)
    Binky: Is Arthur in there?
    Brain: No.
    Binky: (walks in) Thank you, thank you, thank you!
  • This bit from "Buster's Breathless":
    Binky: (pretending to suffocate) Can't breathe! Tell the nurse! I think I have plasma!
    Buster: Don't you mean asthma, Binky?
    (beat)
    Binky: Stupid words, too many consonants all smushed together.
    • Also from "Buster's Breathless":
    Binky: (watching Buster use his inhaler) See? He's not sick at all! He's just playing the kazoo!
    And then later on...
    Binky: So does that mean you don't have to use that kazoo anymore?
    • The best part is, Binky says this even after finding out Buster is using an inhaler and not playing the kazoo.
  • The TV show parody Imagine Spots in "The Contest".
  • From "The Blizzard", the power all over the city is going out due to telephone poles and telephone lines falling over. D.W. then gives us this gem:
    D.W.: Mommy! Daddy! The town is exploding and it's very pretty!
    • From the same episode we also have these little gems involving the school janitor, Mr. Ratburn and Mr. Haneynote :
    The Janitor: By the power vested in me by Local 12 Maintenance Workers and Gym Teachers Union, I'm declaring janitorial law!
    • Then later on
    Mr. Haney: Why eat beans when we have all this food?
    The Janitor: I wouldn't eat that junk if I was you. Besides, it's all froze.
    Mr. Haney: I. Hate. SCHOOL!
    Mr. Ratburn: Mr. Haney (he then looks up towards the ceiling) He didn't mean it!
  • "The Rat Who Came to Dinner" provides several classic D.W. moments:
    • When Mr. Ratburn arrives at the Read house while his roof is being replaced, D.W. scampers around him saying, "Hey! Hey! Look at me! Look at me!" It's D.W.'s personality almost entirely distilled into a single moment.
    • After Mr. Ratburn has settled in, he joins Arthur and D.W. on the living room sofa:
      D.W.: So the school roof fell in?
      Mr. Ratburn: (lifting Kate onto his knee) No, the roof to my home.
      D.W.: But you're a teacher! (hops off the sofa) The school is your home!
      Mr. Ratburn: Teachers don't live at school, D.W. We have houses, just like you!
      D.W.: (solemnly) The world seemed so simple before this moment... (leaves)
    • There's also Arthur's dream at the beginning where his entire family is replaced with Mr. Ratburn (including D.W. and Pal).
    • And then there's this:
      Arthur: (to Muffy and Francine) Wanna go to the Sugar Bowl for some hot cocoa?
      Francine: Sorry, we can't. We're going to the Sugar Bowl.
    • Mr. Ratburn's love for cake returns with the line, "You made CAKE? For ME?" And when they go to bed, he asks, "Will there be more cake tomorrow?"
  • "My Music Rules", is worth watching just for D.W.'s lines:
    D.W.: Do I have any choice in this?
    Jane: None whatsoever.
    D.W.: (feigned enthusiasm) Oh boy, a concert.
    • D.W. tells Yo-Yo Ma (to his face) that she thought that the concert would stink, and was pleasantly surprised.
    • She also misconstrues "Yo-Yo Ma" as "yo mama". It was practically gift wrapped.
  • The Love Ducks from "That's A Baby Show". Every time they are on TV. So weird, yet appealing in a way.
  • "Double Dare": The whole opening with Arthur explaining to the audience how big catastrophes can occur from the smallest incidents.
    Arthur: Like how a guy no-one ever heard of records a song in his bathroom, and it becomes...
    (cut to Imagine Spot of D.W. singing "Crazy Bus" in the living-room, as a deranged-looking Arthur sits on the sofa with two cushions over his ears.)
    Arthur: Stop it. Stop it before I go crazy and EAT THESE CUSHIONS!
  • "Kids Are From Earth, Parents Are From Pluto", when Mr. Frensky is shown falling asleep during a presentation at the last parents' night, and wakes up yelling "Forty-four! Is that correct?". Francine has an Imagine Spot where he does the same in Mr. Ratburn's class, and Mr. Ratburn makes him write lines on a chalkboard.
    • Also, Sue-Ellen's Imagine Spot where her mother shows up in an elaborate dress and everyone laughs at her.
  • D.W. enjoying the stock market show that replaced Mary Moo Cow in "The Last of Mary Moo Cow". Also a minor Heartwarming Moment when it's revealed that the boring reporter who did that show was none other than Mary Moo Cow's actress herself.
  • In "Arthur's Family Feud", when David's souffle falls on the floor and gets ruined, Arthur and D.W. each claim the other one is responsible for what happened. Mr. and Mrs. Read each give the kids a chance to explain what happened to the souffle. When Arthur begins to tell his side of the story, however...
    Arthur: I'll tell you exactly what happened. I was in the den, sitting on the couch-
    D.W.: Liar! You were in the chair!
  • In "Best of the Nest", two of the game's goose characters (Silly and Plain Goose) resemble Buster and Arthur who play as them respectively.
    • On the drive to the campsite, Buster said his mom made him stop playing since it would ruin his eyes and then mistakes Mr. Ratburn for Prunella.
    • At the end, Francine states that neither she or Muffy won the game since the only way to scare off a bear is to "Do the Hokey Pokey". Binky finds that solution ridiculous. A bear can be heard roaring in the distance. Binky immediately starts doing the Hokey Pokey and everyone else joins in.
  • In "Buster's Sweet Success" he tries to resist eating them. Then one morning, he wakes up realizing he ate the chocolate in his sleep. What really made it priceless was his scream that followed.
  • In "Brother, Can You Spare a Clarinet?", Binky is sent to the principal's office for not bringing his clarinet to school. He tells the principal he's a doofus. The principal then, looking through the student files, says, "There's no A Doofus here."
    • When the Tough Customers attempt to end music by ruining the tryouts for the Young Person's Orchestra, Muffy begins playing her violin. It's so awful, Rattles comments that someone else had the same idea.
    • Binky's evil scheme in general is hilarious. He plans to end music worldwide using the anti-music machine, which is just his clarinet connected to a megaphone.
  • Another gem from Thora, in "Arthur Loses His Marbles", she has him polish the floor as part of his marble training to extend his reach, but mutters under her breath that the floor hasn't been waxed in years.
  • Buster mistakenly reading "Director" as "Dr. Ector" in "Elwood City Turns 100!"
  • "Pick a Car, any Car": Jane Read fantasizes about having a two-seater convertible to herself, and leaves her family in her dust.
    Sorry, no room! (tires screech)
  • In 'Bitzi's Break-Up', Buster has an Imagine Spot where his mom gets a new boyfriend, a boring telemarketer. He comes out of the dream yelling "I hate Martin Spivak!", and Arthur, very confused, asks "Who?".
  • "Arthur Weighs In":
    That's your after school snack? No wonder you need husky pants!
  • From "Germophobia", after Buster is declared a slob:
    Arthur: Haven't you ever been sick?
    Bitzi: (in thought bubble) No school for you today, Buster.
    Buster: (dreamily) Yeah...
    Arthur: Okay, wrong question.
  • "S.W.E.A.T." features Binky participating in International Talk Like a Pirate Day.
    Binky: Once me palms were so sweaty, I dropped me clarinet on me big toe. And I've got the scar t' prove it!
    Ratburn: (firmly) Binky, International Talk Like a Pirate Day is over.
    Binky: (disappointed) Okay.
  • One episode featured this gem from D.W., who was talking to Arthur at the time:
    D.W.: Some people see the glass as half full. Other people just have glasses.
  • The episode "Desk Wars" starts out with Arthur in class attempting to introduce the show, but an argument breaks out amongst his friends (who should be the host of the show?):
    • At one point, Binky can be heard yelling, "It's called the Binky Barnes Variety hour! And anyone who doesn't like it can walk!".
    • Mr. Ratburn takes over the introduction, and offers to take the viewer to the teacher's lounge to show how adults (unlike kids) don't fight over trivial matters. In the teacher's lounge, we see:
    Ms. Sweetwater: I didn't move your cheese!
    Principal Haney: Yes you did! Mr. Marco said so!
    (both of them look angrily at Mr. Marco, who tries to look innocent)
    Ms. Krasny: Alright, who hasn't been washing their coffee mugs?!
    (Mr. Ratburn closes the lounge door and looks at the camera, laughing nervously)
  • Everybody dropping glass after someone utters a curse word in "Bleep".
    • it's Nadine's lampshade that's especially noteworthy. D.W calls her into her room to test out the word. Nadine reacts by standing on her nightstand and throws what looks to be an ancient looking vase onto the floor when D.W curses.
  • The Tough Customers trying to figure out what Binky's big secret is in "I Wanna Hold Your Hand". They eventually conclude, incorrectly, that it must have something to do with his upcoming clarinet solo. "Maybe he's playing something really romantic, like Debussy."
  • The revelation in "The Great MacGrady" that Muffy is so sheltered and pampered that she actually doesn't know how to do dishes by hand, believing that she can get the job done simply by squirting some dishwashing liquid on a sink full of dirty dishes.
  • The weird grunt Arthur has at the end of the prologue to "Swept Away". It has to be seen to believed.
  • Brain yelling at his TV at all the wall bangers in the Lost Expy in "Brain Gets Hooked".
    "JUST USE THE CODE, IT'S PI!! YOU LEARNED IT IN EPISODE 6!!"
  • Ratburn: "Muffy, nice work, although your reference to embroidery as 'Pilgrim bling' felt inappropriate."
  • Carl's well-intended assessment of George's drawing in "When Carl Met George":
    George: What do you think of my drawing? Do you like it?
    Carl: That's brown. I hate brown.
  • This:
    Commercial: Sweet and fishy, good for kids, Golden Delicious Honey Squid!
    Arthur and D.W.: [in unison] Bleah!
  • In Arthur's Perfect Christmas, Binky keeps trying to make cookies or other desserts, but keeps making stupid mistakes like making banana bread but forgetting to peel the bananas. (writing) "Peel... bananas." This culminates with Binky appearing in a fantasy sequence in which Arthur being teased for being a doofus and he shows up and starts shouting "Doofus! Doofus!"
    Arthur: Binky? What are you doing here? You're not supposed to be in this fantasy!
    Binky: Oh, sorry... Try my peach cobbler?
    Arthur: Get out!
    • Buster falling asleep because his mom keeps thinking every day's Christmas and hence waking him up early. It ends up that he falls asleep at Muffy's party and faceplants into his cake slice; Arthur wakes him up and Buster goes "Is it Christmas again?" Arthur responds "No, and you have cake on your face."
  • Arthur fantasizing about being awarded the Marc Brown Certificate of Existence.
  • "One word for you, Brain! Alien invasion!"
  • The Beatles references in "The Last Tough Customer", especially the song they sing.
  • Brain is sitting under a tree, trying to create some sort of plan that will get Muffy into trouble, after he and Francine accuse her of bribing the judges so she could win a science contest. Arthur goes over to confront him about his changing behavior.
    Brain: Have you ever realized how frighteningly easy it is to manipulate someone into doing whatever you want?
    Arthur: Brain, you're acting kinda weird today...
    Brain: (with a crazy look on his face) AM I? MUAHAHAHA!
    Arthur: :|
    Brain: (still laughing)
  • In "Binky Rules", anytime Buster used that detective lingo:
    • "Hey gopher ball, what do yo know about this shenanigag on Binky?"
    • "Brain, you know your goulash, slobber a bid-full or Binky's gonna clutch the gummy!"
    • "Hardly, foo-foo. I do my best noodle-work at high altitudes."
      • What was even more amusing was Fern's reaction to it. At one point, she asked him to speak English. Later, as they were sitting across from each other at a table at the Sugar Bowl, she reached over and snatched his detective hat off his head.
    • The parody of the Mystery! opening at the beginning is hilarious, especially because it uses the real theme.
  • From S15's "Buster the Lounge Lizard", when Mr. Ratburn confronts Buster over the Dark Buggy toy he brought into the classroom, he accidentally causes it to fire a suction dart at the ceiling, hoist itself up, and... deploy a spinning coloured light ball accompanied by disco music.
  • Anytime Mr. Ratburn interacts with computers.
  • In "Brain Freeze," Brain's mom's ice cream parlor receives competition from a new parlor down the block called Yumbobo, whose mascot is a giant blue penguin, which Brain notices has a little curly pig tail.
    Brain: A tail?! Not only are you blue, you're anatomically incorrect!
  • A bit of dialog between Francine's dad, the kids' team coach, and Binky in "Arthur Makes the Team":
    Mr. Frensky: Remember, if you win the game, I take you all out for ice cream! And if you lose-
    Binky: You drive us to the outskirts of town and leave us there?
    Mr. Frensky: Nope! I still take you out for ice cream.
    Binky: Aw, man. I'm never gonna see the outskirts of town.
  • Quackers, the toy that D.W. got instead of Tina the Talking Tabby in Arthur's Perfect Christmas and Arthur's reaction to him.
  • The ending of "Buster Baxter, Cat Saver", in which, after Buster saves Arthur and Francine from a "runaway piano", he imagines a movie where he fights pianos in space and braves dangerous, piano-infested waters.
    Buster: Coming to a theater near you!
    Arthur: It IS NOT!
    Buster: How about a CD?
    Arthur: No!
    Buster: A video game?
    Arthur: NO!
    Buster: Comic book?
    Arthur: NOOOOOOOOO!!
    (all while the "Here We Go Again" music cue plays)
  • In "Revenge of the Chip," the story of D.W. thinking a green potato chip would kill her makes it into the paper, thanks to Bitzi's Slice of Life column. Jane starts telling the story all over town and while D.W. looks on, horrified, she stuffs clippings of said story into envelopes while explaining over the phone that of course she's sending it to all the relatives. As we watch, Jane's bright red lips disengage from her face and begin to say the relatives' names very fast while suspended in midair. Her teeth show too, making it look like the lips are engaged in a wicked smile, until D.W. cries, "MOOOOM!"
  • The opening to "Clarissa is Cracked." Arthur and D.W. envision what they would have if they were Egyptian mummies. Arthur would have Bionic Bunny action figures, while D.W. is missing her snowball (which Arthur points out won't happen for another 3,448 years). The parents then walk in, finding Arthur inexplicably wearing an Egyptian-style headdress while D.W. is wrapped in bandages.
    David: If we walk out quietly, we won't have to ask.
    Jane: Good idea.
  • The kids trying to teach D.W. how to ride a bike.
    Brain: [pulls out a collapsible pointer] Let's start with the basics. This is a bicycle. Its propulsion system consists of an interlocking-
    D.W.: I just wanna ride it, not build one.
    Francine: Excuse me, Professor Complicated! D.W., everyone knows the most important thing about riding is-
    Arthur: Stopping!
    Brain: Peddling!
    Buster: Steering!
    Francine: Going really, really fast!
    Arthur: [beat] Let's start with something we all agree on: wearing a helmet. [puts a helmet on D.W.'s head]
    Brain: You're putting it on backwards.
    Francine: That is not backwards!
    Arthur: Francine, it's covering her eyes.
    Francine: It's not covering her eyes, it's protecting them!
    [the kids argue with each other until D.W. sneaks out from their huddle and whistles]
    Buster: [watch beeps] Oops. Gotta get home for lunch.
    Brain: Me too.
    Francine: Me three.
    Arthur: I'll teach you more after lunch, D.W.
    D.W.: [on her bike] Arthur! How do I get down?!
  • A lot of what goes on "D.W.'s Name Game," from D.W. imagining Arthur eating a cake whole to them pulling faces at each other while complaining about each other to Catherine, to the various terms they get to describe each other from the thesaurus. And then there's D.W. imagining Arthur as her "obedient hypno-brother":
    Arthur: I enjoy doing your chores. I enjoy doing your chores.
    D.W.: Of course you do.
  • They named an episode "Maria Speaks". It's so deliciously meta, and probably a nod to sister show Martha Speaks.
  • From "Sue Ellen Moves In", all the kids are running a rumor mill, resulting in a large Split-Screen Phone Call that Binky is having trouble keeping up with.
    Binky: Hello? Hello?! WHAT IS EVERYONE TALKING ABOUT?? [everyone hangs up, except for someone who picks up a phone] Hey, did you hear about the new kid?
    Mr. Ratburn: Who is this?
    Binky: Oops! Wrong number!
  • The show has actually parodied Jerry Springer.

1981 Film:

  • The entire movie is hilarious, but some lines stand out, most of them spoken by Arthur when he's particularly drunk.
    • "I think I'll have another scotch; would you like another fish?"
    • "Oh, you're a hedge."
    • "Steal something casual."
    • (Notices someone with a Nice Hat) "Nice (continues walking, gets about five rows further) hat."
    • All of Arthur's speech when announcing that the wedding has been called off.
    • Susan: "A real woman could stop you from drinking." Arthur: "It'd have to be a real big woman."
    • And all the comments about the stuffed-and-mounted moose head on the wall at his fiance's father's mansion.
      Arthur: You must have hated this moose.
    • Apparently there were a ton of different takes of this scene, with Dudley Moore playing off the moose a different way each time.
    • This exchange between Linda and her father.
      Ralph: I take it this bum will be calling you?
      Linda: Dad! He's a millionaire.
      Ralph: You have my permission to marry him.
    • The scene of when Susan's dad grabs a knife from the cheese in an attempt to kill Arthur and Linda.
      Ralph: (deliriously) He's taking the knife out of the cheese...do you think he wants some cheese?

2011 Film:

  • After a conversation with Hobson about being more responsible and looking after himself: "Would you just remove the half naked business woman from the underside of my bed?"
  • The table saw scene.
  • The police officers knowing Arthur by name.
  • Arthur's habit of people spotting from the bathtub and giving people hilarious descriptions.
  • Susan punching Arthur in the face in the chapel after he decides not to marry her.
  • After using candy as a euphemism for his alcohol addiction around a group of kids, a child asks Arthur if he means drugs. Or meth. Or crack.