Funny: Rugrats

  • From the Carwash episode, Tommy impersonates his grandpa while foam fills up the car, by putting bubbles on his face. It later becomes a heartwarming moment when you realise that Tommy's impersonation helps Chuckie get over his fear of the carwash.
    • Another moment at the beginning of the same episode where the camera cuts back and forth between Chuckie's interpretation of events at the carwash and Chaz's.
  • From "I Remember Melville":
    Tommy: I know! We'll get Chuckie a new bug!
    Phil: Hey, if we find two bugs, can I eat the other one?
  • From the episode "The Seven Voyages of Cynthia," in which Tommy and Chuckie lose Angelica's doll, but are afraid to tell her:
    Tommy: Hey, Angelica... uh... we got something to tell ya...
    Angelica: What is it?!
    Tommy: Uh... it's about Cynthia...
    Angelica: Oh, Tommy! Do you know where she is?!
    Tommy: Uh...
    Angelica: Cuz if I find out who took her, I'll mash em, and crash em, and smash em into a million zillion blobs of applesauce!!!
    Tommy and Chuckie: *gulp*
    • And then, after agreeing to help her look for Cynthia, Tommy and Chuckie pretend to search around Tommy's backyard:
      Chuckie: Tommy, what are we doin' in this bush? We know Cynthia's not in here...
      Tommy: Well... I guess we could tell Angelica what really happened...
      Chuckie: I don't know, Tommy. You wanna end up a blob of applesauce?!
  • "Pickles vs. Pickles":
    Angelica: Oh daddy, you're silly. I can't be in trouble, I'm Angelica! Your only daughter, your princess, your cupcake! Your little tax shelter!
    • On representing herself in court:
    Angelica: Your highness, I'd like to dismiss my lawyer for gross incontinence.
  • The start of "A Visit From Lipschitz" references the 1967 film Guess Who's Coming to Dinner:
    Didi: Stu, you'll never guess who's coming to dinner!
    Stu: Sidney Poitier?
  • Chaz's recap of Chuckie's first visit to the barber: "And after he smeared the industrial strength cologne and got into the barrel of hair, he knocked over a tub of lather, skidded into a shelf of shampoo, and snapped a cardboard cut-out of Crew Cut the Clown right in half."
    • Arguably, Chuckie's mangled retelling of the same tale to the other babies was even funnier.
    • Another hilarious part of the same episode: Chaz claims he's never been so humiliated. Cue Stu and Didi naming instances where he has in fact been that humiliated, with Chaz looking back and forth between them as if at a tennis match, until he screams, "Okay, okay, I exaggerated!"
  • This conversation during the Beach Episode:
    Chuckie: We look silly, we feel sticky, and we smell like a coconut cream pie.
    Angelica: (Runs by) Look at me! Look at me!
    Tommy: (Deadpan) Well, at least we don't look like that.
  • Or how about when Lil asks Phil if he'd save her from a snake? His response — "How big a snake?" (Dies laughing).
  • Stu's descent into madness while trying to procure chocolate pudding late at night for the (not really) injured Angelica in "Angelica Breaks a Leg". Even better, the house was out of chocolate pudding so Stu had to go to a late-night grocery store to buy pudding mix.
    Didi: Stu, what are you doing?
    Stu: Making chocolate pudding.
    Didi: It's 4:00 in the morning. Why on earth are you making chocolate pudding?
    Stu: Because I've lost control of my life.
  • The episode "The Joke's on You"
    Angelica: It's gonna be lots of fun staying at your house today, Uncle Sucker... I mean, Uncle Stu!
  • The episode where they camp in the backyard.
    Angelica: We ran away cause we were scared of Satchmo.
    Stu: Satchmo? The trumpet player?
    Angelica: No, the monster!
    • Later...
    Stu: Angelica seems to think there's someone in the neighborhood named "Satchmo".
    Grandpa: The trumpet player?
    Stu: No, the monster. Now where did she get an idea like that?
    Grandpa: Beats me. Must be something they got from TV.
    • Grandpa and Stu's conversation about appropriate camp stories is hilarious, because of the reversal of expectations:
    Stu: Say, I hope you're not reading the kids anything too scary, pop.
    Lou: Well, that all depends. It might be scary if you're thirty-five years old and you suddenly realize that you've never really lived!
    Stu: ...Look, pop, are you sure about this whole camping experiment?
    Lou: Stu, just because you had one bad eensy-weensy experience in the woods doesn't mean you have to wreck the great outdoors for everyone.
    Stu: Teensy weensy? I was lost for three days!
    Lou: Stu, that was over a year ago. Isn't it about time you put it behind ya?
    • And this follow-up conversation a bit later:
    Didi: Stu, this isn't Manitoba, it's our backyard. The kids'll be fine. Just forget about them, and soon it will be morning, and we can all go on with our lives!
    Stu: Yeah, I guess you're right. Good night.
    (Light goes off, then comes back on)
    Stu: What if there's a flash flood?
    Didi: Stu, go to sleep.
  • When Tommy spends the weekend at Chuckie's house. After Tommy wakes him up over and over again to say something innocuous like "I'm glad I'm staying at your house," Chuckie finally has enough:
    Tommy: Hey, Chuckie...
    Chuckie: WHAT?! Tommy, what?! I'm trying to sleep!
    Tommy: Oh, I was just thinking about green jello.
    Chuckie: Green jello?
    Tommy: Yeah, how do they do it?
    Chuckie: Do what?
    Tommy: Make it green.
    Chuckie: I don't know, Tommy. Just go to sleep!
    (They do, but then Chuckie's eyes shoot open.)
    Chuckie: (whispering, frightened) How do they make it green?
  • The Noodle Incident in the first episode:
    Grandpa: Remember what happened the last time you boys put on a show?
    Stu: Oh, come on, pop, my arm healed, and Drew sees almost perfectly out of that eye.
    • The scene where Stu and Drew argue about their childhoods during the puppet show, which descends into a family therapy session.
    Stu: That was my bike! I earned it with my paper route!
    Drew: It was still usable! I only bent the handlebars a little! And that was on account of what you did to my skateboard!
    Didi: Okay, let's agree to disagree. Stu, you shouldn't have wrecked Drew's skateboard. Drew, you shouldn't have bent Stu's handlebars.
    Boris: What's the matter with you, Didi? Let the boys argue.
    • To add to the humor, keep in mind both of them are still moving and communicating with their hand puppets while knelled down inside the prop theater while this whole argument takes place.
  • The babies getting naked in "Naked Tommy"
  • Grandpa killing Tommy's pet tarantula in "Spike Runs Away." So what's for dinner?
    • Stu buys two gerbils, and the kids let them loose in the basement. Several weeks later, Tommy and Chuckie open the basement door.
    Chuckie: Look, Tommy! The floor's movin'!
    • While they're staring at the basement floor, Stu finds them and sees the "moving floor" and immediately yells, "Didi! The gerbils have reproduced!"
    • Even before that scene is a great joke, when Didi is annoyed that the gerbils keep leaving their little "presents" all over the house. Tommy and Chuckie exclaim, "Presents?" Smash cut to a close-up of gerbil poop.
    Tommy: Hey! This isn't a present! It's gerdil poop!
  • Lou and Stu arguing with each other:
    Lou: Why do you always lose your keys, dag-nabbit?!
    Stu: Why do you always talk like a prospector when you're aggravated, "con-flabbit?"
  • The entirety of "Angelica Orders Out". When Angelica is mad that Grandpa Lou won't order her any dessert from a home delivery deli (aside from baked apples, which she hates) she calls the place when Grandpa Lou is asleep to order some desert. When the delivery person tells her that she's too young, she uses Stu's new voice-changing gadget that makes her sound exactly like her mother. She then orders every single dessert they have for delivery. When the delivery boy shows up, she grabs a picture of Didi, and speaks to the delivery boy through the mail slot.
    Angelica: Just leave the bags by the door and go away.
    Delivery boy: Uh... what?
    We see a picture of Didi peeking through the mail slot in the door
    Angelica: Down here! Just leave the bags by the door.
    Delivery boy: Uh... okay. Thank you for calling Zippy's Snappy Home Delivery.
    Angelica: Go away.
  • This Getting Crap Past the Radar paraphrasing in the Autumn special where Lou meets his future second wife.:

  • Some say it was topped by them actually Getting Crap Past the Radar by having Angelica say "turd" in "The Blizzard".
  • Angelica's parents reactions during this random exchange:
    Angelica: Mommy, I have a question.
    Charlotte: Yes, dear?
    Angelica: Where do babies come from?
  • When Chuckie thinks he's gonna grow gigantic, Angelica tricks him into thinking he squashed her, and the babies try to convince him he must be mistaken.
    Phil: And even if you did...that's okay.
  • The "moose" Running Gag in "Party Animals".
  • Angelica's supposedly fake Flashback in "No More Cookies". In the first part, it seems like it's going to be a Heartwarming Moment, with Angelica's mom and dad telling her to say "mommy" or "daddy", respectively. Her first word?
    • It gets even funnier in a later scene, where we see her taking her first steps. Her parents go crazy trying to save the magical moment for posterity...then they realize that she's just trying to get at a plate of chocolate cookies on the table.
  • One of the best scenes is Grandpa naming off past experiences Stu's had with fixing things, all ending in some form of disaster. The best one is obvious.
    Grandpa: This one I STILL don't understand! October 3: Change the Refrigerator Lightbulb: 9 stitches and a case of pink eye?
  • The Pirate Episode:
  • The entirety of "Regarding Stuie", where Stu hits his head and thinks he's a baby.
  • Tommy & Chuckie's Wild West style showdown with the "Junkfood Kid". She smacks Chuckie across the cheek with a chocolate bar, leaving an imprint ("I've been branded!") Tommy bends over to help him up, and she shoves a popsicle down the back of his diaper.
    YOWCH!! It's cold!!
  • Chuckie's reaction when Tommy begins planning The Quest of the Week in "Let There Be Light":
    Chuckie: (from under his blanket) No way, I'm not goin'! Not this time! This isn't just regular-plain-old scary, Tommy. This is THE DARK! There's no light at all, not even a night light! Forget it, Tommy. I'm. Stayin'. Right. Here.
    (The other three go off, leaving Chuckie sitting silently under the blanket for a minute.)
    Chuckie: (panicking and running after them, still under the blanket) Hey, wait, you're not gonna leave me?! WAIT! I'm coming, too!!
    • This exchange when the blackout first happens is also priceless, primarily because of Stu's tone:
    Didi: (completely calmly, like she's announcing something he must not know yet) Stu, honey, all the lights in the house are off!
    Stu: I'm aware of that, Deed.
    • Also in that episode:
    Phil: Why are you under your blanket?
    Chuckie: 'Cause it's dark out there!
    Lil: But it's dark under there, too.
    Chuckie: -beat- Gee, I never thought of that.
  • This Running Gag: "This coffee tastes like mud!" "It is mud."
  • The Garage Sale episode. After the babies have sold everything inside the house, and when Stu is brooding about it, Didi comes along with a little speech about how they still have each other and losing all their material goods can bring them closer. Stu's response?
    Stu: Put a sock in it, Deed.
    • I'm not Stu!! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
  • This exchange from "Angelica in Love":
    Angelica: I'm playing the most dangerous game of all.
    Chuckie: Musical chairs?
    Angelica: No, dummy, LOVE!!!
  • Chuckie sees his dad buried in the sand, only his head is visible. Chuckie's reaction is priceless.
  • In "Piggy's Pizza Palace": Tommy giving commands to the dog suit in Yiddish.
    Tommy: (After everybody gives him a puzzled look) My Grandpa Boris always says that to Spike.
  • From "Naked Tommy", this exchange between Betty and Didi when they find the babies naked.
    Betty: Sweet goon von goolagon! What's going on here?! Philly, Lilly, you're nudists!
    Didi: Betty! I'm surprised at you, they're just babies, Lipschitz says...
    Betty: Never mind that hippie Lipschitz! I don't know what kind of baby colony you're running, Deed, but it's time to face facts! The sixties are over and we lost, so get with the program, alright?
  • The end of the episode where Tommy is afraid he's turning into a monster. Betty's brother stops by and says "Big sisters are monsters". Tommy then says to Phil "Isn't Lil a teeny bit older than you". Lil turns around with candy canes for fangs and Phil runs away in terror.
  • The end of the episode where Angelica tries to convince Phil and Lil that either of them is the unfavourite. She walks in on Charlotte and Betty talking about sweaters.
    Charlotte: My favourite will always be Angora.
    Angelica: (terrified) Who's Angora!?
  • The "Vacation" episode where they go to Las Vegas and Angelica gets up on "stage" in the snack bar and starts singing her own song "Angelica the Beautiful". Then when the mothers leave the Circus Giganticus hotel and see Angelica performing hew own rendition of "Vacation" on the big TV outside. Their reactions are priceless. This scene also counts as a CMOA.
    • While Angelica is singing, all of the adults are frantically trying to stop her or get the babies, except grandpa! He actually joins Angelica in singing and throws things at the performers who were chasing after her.
    • Hell, the whole episode counts as one big CMOF.
  • This Getting Crap Past the Radar moment from "Mommy's Little Assets."
    Charlotte: (on the phone to Jonathan) What? Not you Jonathan; you know I would never call one of my employees "sweetie." At least not since the Clarence Thomas hearings.
    • Which was part of Angelica setting off one hell of a car alarm in the parking garage with a voice saying "Stand back! You are too close to the vehicle!" to which Angelica responds, "Hey Mommy, neat! A talking car!" Then when the main (and loud) alarm starts up, all Angelica can say is "Cool!"
    • While we're on Charlotte/Jonathan, there's this bit:
    Charlotte: (To the kids) Say bye-bye to mommy!
    Jonathan: (Talking to Charlotte on the phone) Bye-bye, mommy!
    Charlotte: Not you.
  • From the episode where Angelica learned a swear word, just the end where she casually says, "She thinks we're all, little..." and then her parents scream to censor the word out. It also offers as a bit of a funny moment considering several kids actually would have done that in her shoes because they didn't know the consequences!
    • This is followed by Angelica actually saying the word on the children's TV show she was trying out for. When the host is ordering Angelica to leave, Angelica counters that the host did indeed say it. The host then loses it and actually does say it before the broadcast is cut. Angelica is ecstatic while everyone else in the studio is totally shocked.
      Angelica: See?! See?! She did say it!
  • From "Tommy At Bat" when Didi sees Tommy on the TV and does her big slow-motion faint on the floor.
  • When Stu sleepwalks and imagines he's a TV magician. Didi finds him on the living room floor and...
    Didi: Stu, are you alright?
    Stu: (half asleep) Sure, Ramona.
    Didi: Ramona! Who's Ramona!?
    • Or when he thinks he's hosting a cooking show, and starts absentmindedly throwing eggs around the kitchen. Then when Tommy and Chucky stumble in on him...
  • Angelica was once told she had spunk from a mafia-isque restaurant owner.
    Angelica: I got spunk? Is that good?
    • The restaurant owner calling her "Angie" instead of by her real name is kind of funny.
  • At the end of "Angelica the Magnificent," Tommy picks up Angelica's supposedly magic wand. He points it at the shed the dads spent all episode putting together and utters a "magic" word. The shed promptly collapses (though due to shaky workmanship), but the look on Tommy's face and the way he slowly lowers his arms are priceless.
  • In "Kid TV", Phil and Lil make fun of a soap opera. Angelica, not realizing what a soap opera is (she assumes that it's like a regular opera), comes on wearing a Viking outfit and singing about how if it's an opera, they have to sing.
  • Blocky and Oxwinkle. They even got June Foray!
  • Chuckie's attempt at telling the most un-scary "scary story" he can think of so he won't scare himself:
    Chuckie: So, um...the boy opened the door, and...he finded the most beautifulest room with lots of flowers and big fluffy pillows and bowls filled to the top with yummy candy! So the haunted house wasn't haunted after all, and the scaredy boy wasn't scared no more. The End!
    Angelica: What?! You can't end it like that! That wasn't even scary! A scary story doesn't got flowers and pillows and candy! Now tell it right! Or I'll start telling the story again!
    Chuckie: So, then, um...the boy, uh, opened the door...and the room was kinda dark. And there was pillows, but they was hard and lumpy. And the candy was yucky.
  • In the movie Dil dirties his diaper and Tommy goes "It looks like we'll have to change his diaper" and Phil goes "What do you mean we?"
  • In "Stu-Maker's Elves", Chuckie bounces up and down on a mattress and has fun but then bounces so much that the mattress closes leaving his head sticking out. That visual and his scream of "TOMMYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!" are priceless.
  • "Rebel Without A Teddy Bear": Tommy's failed attempt at being bad.
  • "Reptar On Ice". Period.
  • This exchange when Chuckie and Angelica are handcuffed together and they can't find the key:
    Angelica: It's probably back at the handcuff factory! Some bozo probably forgot to put it in the package!
  • This moment in "Family Feud":
    Howard: Betty a thief?! That's an absurd proposition!
    • From the same episode, when the group is playing charades and Howard fails to guess Stu's rendition of Dances with Wolves:
    Howard: Oh, I'm not that familiar with musicals.
    Stu: It isn't a musical, you imbecile!
  • "...And my personal favorite: Lonely Space Vixens. That's for after you go to bed."
  • Chuckie throwing the snail Tommy gave him to replace Mellville had me laughing my ass off.
    Chuckie: I don't want a new bug! And besides, that's not even a bug! It's a snail! GAH! *throws the snail out of the screen*
    Phil: ...Told ya.
  • Grandpa's bedtime story in "Grandpa's Date":
    andhefoundsomefriendsandeveryonewashappy. The end!"
  • In "At the Movies", the parents take the kids to see The Dummi Bears Movie. Grandpa is very displeased and provides us this hilarious moment:
    Dummi Bear: But without the list, this will become the land without smiles...
    • Later when Grandpa decides to leave the theatre
    Grandpa: I'm gonna get some candy. I'd rather rot my teeth than sit here and rot my brain.
  • After Angelica has told the babies that babies come from eggs, Tommy wishes his parents would get one so he could have a little brother.
    Chuckie: Too bad we're babies, otherwise we could just go find an egg ourselves. (pause as everyone does nothing but look at him, until he sighs in resignation) I'll get the screwdriver.
  • Don't forget this piece of dialogue from Mega Diaper Babies:
    Changeling: You'll never get away with this, Angelicatron!
    Angelica: (as Angelicatron) Aw shut up, you dumb doll.
  • The way Grandpa says "fifteen" in almost every episode he's been in.
  • Angelica, a three year old, says this:
    Angelica: This is ridiculous! I'm practically a grown-up, and I'm stuck wasting my time with you dumb babies!
  • Whenever the babies mispronounce words or unknowingly substitute them with different words. Examples:
    • "Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help you Bob?"
    • "Angelica! You're the one with rhinoplasty!"
    • "The jury?" "Not the jury, the jerky!"
    • "The fudge?!" "Nooo, judge! Can 't you babies talk right?!"
    • "Hey, Tommy, these cradles don't taste like clay!"
  • When Angelica thinks she's invisible in "The Baby Vanishes" due to the adults ignoring her as to not reinforce her behavior. The adults barely react as she dumps Spike's food on their heads or spills juice on them. Stu and Drew seem ready to simply scold her only for Didi to stop them. Didi however almost loses this charade when Angelica steals her glasses and runs off.
  • In the episode "Stu Gets a Job", Tommy is upset that his dad isn't around to play with him anymore, so he sets up traps around the house trying to prevent him from going to work. Stu thinks the traps are childish pranks set by Drew and tries some pranks of his own.
    Stu: (speaking into the phone and pinching his fingers over his nostrils to badly imitate his brother's voice) Yes, hello. I'd like to order fifty pepperoni and cheese pizzas to be delivered immediately. My name? Drew Pickles. (Hangs up and walks off chuckling, while Lou shakes his head.)
    • Later, when Stu finds all his clothes missing from his closet except his disco suit, he's forced to wear it to work. Lou looks up from reading the newspaper as Stu enters the kitchen.
    Lou: (chuckling) Lookin' good, son.
    Stu: (flatly) Thanks, pop...
    • Still later:
    Stu:(speaking into the phone and pinching his fingers over his nostrils to badly imitate his brother's voice) Hello, I'd like to report a car parked illegally on private property. The license plate reads 'DREW'.
    • And then, the final confrontation of both brothers.
    Didi: (hears the doorbell and goes to answer the door) Drew!
    Drew: (fuming) Where's Stu?! (enters the kitchen with Didi to find Stu calmly sitting at the kitchen table drinking coffee) Stu, let's talk.
    Stu: (calmly gestures to an empty chair) Fine by me.
    Drew: (takes a seat) Stu, I couldn't get to work this morning because someone had my car towed!
    Stu: Oh, and I suppose I wore my disco suit to work today just for kicks, huh?!
    Drew: I don't know what you're talking about. But I think you do know something about the fifty pizzas I got the other day!
  • In "The Mysterious Mr. Friend," as Stu is rapidly producing Mr. Friend dolls in the basement.
    • Lil's reaction to the approaching army of Mr. Friend dolls is hilariously nonchalant:
    Lil: Boy, this has really been one of those days, huh?
  • In "The Stork", Stu and Drew are making a giant omelette in the kitchen while the other adults are in the living room watching football.
    Stu: I didn't know how many eggs to order for the omelette, so I ordered a gross.
    Drew: A gross?! Stu, that's a 144 eggs!
    Stu: (lifts the cover to the giant bowl of eggs) Oops...
    • And later
    Stu: (tosses a handful of objects into the bowl of cracked egg yolks)
    Drew: (picks up one of the objects) Stu, what are these?
    Stu: They're greek olives.
    Drew: Stu, you can't put greek olives in an omelette!
    Stu: Why not?
  • In "Let Them Eat Cake", the organist playing "Take Me Out to the Ball Game".
  • "...just had this.....WAAAAAAAAAAAAAASHED!!!!!!!"
  • This exchange from "Radio Daze":
    Chuckie: Um...chucking wood?
  • At the beginning of the first Kimi-era episode, "Finsterella", Chuckie is in his high chair, and he and the adults have a little fun with him being able to talk. It's even funnier because Chuckie has a big smile on his face the whole time:
    Kira: (hands Chuckie a muffin) Would you like something to eat, Chuckie?
    Chuckie: No. (takes a bite of the muffin)
    Chaz: (hands Chuckie a sippy cup) Are you thirsty, little fella?
    Chuckie: No. (takes a sip out of the cup)
    Marvin: You ever gonna amount to anything, Chuck?
    Chuckie: No.
    Chaz: Our Chuckie talks.
    Chuckie: No.
  • In "Hair", Lou and his army buddy are laughing over their baldness and beer guts and how they tried to cover it up (only for Dil to basically "unfurl" the ruse) when Tommy walks in wearing his grandpa's toupee. Both Lou and the army buddy are still laughing, while Didi basically has a -__- look on her face.
  • In the wedding episode, "Let Them Eat Cake," when Elaine doesn't show up for the ceremony and the event planners can't find her, Stu tells everyone not to worry and figures that Elaine probably just got cold feet—and when Stu claims that Didi disappeared for three days before their own wedding, this earns him a slap from his wife.
  • In "Lady Luck", the twins think the shuffleboard pucks are cookies. Phil and Lil try to bite into one...
    Lil: I think this cookie is older than we are.
  • In "The Odd Couple", when Tommy spends the weekend at Chuckie's house, Chuckie is very particular about how his toys are set up and played with, even showing Tommy how to properly play with his prized 'Bogo Block Village' playset, until...
    Chuckie: (upon entering his bedroom) No, Tommy, no!
    Tommy: (holding a Bogo Block person) What's wrong, Chuckie?
    Chuckie: What's wrong? What's wrong? The Bogo Block Village! (shows a police car parked at a fire department) The police car's at the fire station, (shows a fire truck parked at the airport terminal) the fire truck's at the airport, (shows an airplane on the roof of a building) the airplane's on top of the restaurant! (shows a Bogo Block person on its side halfway out a door and another through a window) People are hanging out of windows and doors, (shows two buildings askew on their foundations) buildings are moved, (Chuckie waves a Bogo Block person in each of his fists) and you've completely taken apart City Hall!
  • In one episode, Angelica refers to herself as "Angelica C. Pickles, Esquire."
  • The sheer level of Stylistic Suck in the Show Within a Show "Oodles the Talking Poodle" is absolutely hysterical. It's an over-the-top parody of Lassie, starring a pink poodle named "Oodles", who inexplicably wears a red cape everywhere and has an offscreen actor doing his best to lip-synch with him in every scene.
    Talulah: Look, Billy! It's Oodles!
    Billy: Yeah! And it looks like something's wrong!
    Oodles: Billy! Talulah! Come quick! Uncle Lyle's locked in the barn again and it's on fire!
    Billy and Talulah: OH NO!
    Billy: Wait a minute...we don't have an Uncle Lyle.
    Talulah: We don't have a barn either...
    • This exchange, after Oodles busts into action and pulls Uncle Lyle out of the barn.
    Uncle Lyle: Unh...what happened?
    Oodles: You were knocked unconscious by a falling beam after the electric cattle heater shorted out and sparked a fire in the hayloft! I performed an incredible act of bravery by putting out the fire and pulling you to safety!
    Uncle Lyle: Oh. Thanks. (beat) Hey, wait a minute! You can't're a dog!
  • In "Mommy's Little Assets", when Jonathan has to take over Charlotte's sales pitch to an elderly couple, he references Dragnet:
    Jonathan: "Just the facts, ma'am."
    Woman:...We think television is evil.
    • Later in the episode, Drew comes home and asks where Charlotte is. Angelica, not knowing what she's saying, sweetly tells Drew that she's upstairs "washing off the stench of failure".
    • When Charlotte scolds Angelica, she asks what she'll do if she says Angelica can't have what she's demanding. Angelica's response is "Ask Daddy?"
  • "The Santa Experience":
    Angelica: It all started when the first present was given by the Pilgrims a long long time ago. After that, everybody started giving presents. Even the Easter Bunny started giving them until Santa slapped him with a lawsuit.
  • The episode "Rhinoceritis" has Angelica claiming that Chuckie will turn into a rhino because he's caught a rare disease. But after Angelica finally admits that she made it all up, Tommy and the twins point that Angelica herself is displaying some of the symptoms she mentioned. The end of the episode has Drew finding her crouched on all fours...
    Drew: Angelica, are you eating grass?
    Angelica: Careful, Daddy. The rhinoceros is known to charge at random.