Get Help With English Here

Thanks.

Is there anything else to correct ?

Yeah, but I don't have time right now. Sorry.

So I got a suspension in editing any TV tropes pages because of my poor grammar, and I generally have more problematic grammar mistakes when I try to make larger edits and entries. I tried to make a few edits with the GameBreaker.Epic Seven page and trying to add a few entries, but I want to correct several of my grammar mistakes I've made in my older entries. What grammar problems I have with the following entries I've made: Remnant Violet, Ruele of Light, Maid Chloe, Auxiliary Lots, Challenger Dominiel, Faithless Lidica, Kayron, Basar, Charles, Krau, Vildred, and Falconer Kluri.

Also, bonus points if you have knowledge on playing Epic Seven, because this is a game I play myself. What other game breaking units you think it's worth adding into this page and I'll try to make an entry edit for it through this thread and see what I could correct on this (both from a gameplay perspective and grammar wise)?

Edited by DarkPaladinX on Oct 8th 2020 at 3:53:33 AM

DarkPaladinX: See, how it works here is that you pick a specific sentence, or paragraph, and then you post it here in this thread. You're not supposed to just direct people to a page.

• Non-Standard Character Design: Most humans look basically like actual humans, though depicted in a stylized artstyle like you would expect to see in a children's book (even though this series is not for children). Sock's owner however, looks like a stick figure with thick arms and legs.
• Skewed Priorities: At the end of Empire, Sock's owner is looking in his house's wreckages for Sock's receipt, all while sporting a mildly annoyed expression, despite the fact that the city he lives him just got completely destroyed by a demonic hamster, an army of monsters from hell and three gods. He's even happy to finally find the receipt, as if bringing back his evil hamster to the pet shop would change anything.

Edited by MichaelKatsuro on Oct 8th 2020 at 4:13:56 PM

Okay, I can give a few examples from that page:

• Maid Chloe is also an annoying Moonlight healer to deal with in Arena defense teams, mainly because of her ultimate ability, VIP Treatment, which not only revives all allies and provide all allies with an attack buff. Any living allies will also be granted a revive buff, forcing the opponent to kill her allies again. She can also heal an ally with the lowest health at the start of her turn, making her viable in longer and sustained fights. In fact, her very presence of being able to revive all allies and provide the entire team with an attack buff makes her relatively difficult to deal with for most cleave teams to the point that Sinful Angelica, a 4* Dark Soul Weaver, was designed for cleave teams to specifically counter her gimmicks (alongside Sinful Angelica being an answer to Ruele in a lesser extent).
• Ruele of Light is arguably one of the best Moonlight healers (the other being Maid Chloe and Blood Moon Haste) in the game. Her ultimate, Light Ascending, is one of the very few abilities that can revive an allied party member (other being Maid Chloe's VIP Treatment for the entire team, abeit reviving allies with far less health). Unlike Maid Chloe, she can revive the said ally with full health and invincibility, allowing the revived ally to survive another turn. Even if she doesn't use this ability to revive an ally, she can also dispell all debuffs on the ally before applying the full heal and invincibility. And it doesn't stop there, she can also dispell all debuffs on an ally with her second skill, as well as providing a barrier and health on top of that. Her basic attack also heals an ally with the lowest health, and if the player decides to soulburn it, she can heal the entire team. Since her healing scales out of her maximum health and her ultimate ability heals the ally full health and invincibility (in addition to reviving them), she is one of the most versatile healers in the game as well being an effective tank healer. Her only drawback is her very poor AI, meaning she's not well suited in Arena defense teams unless if the player puts in multiple threats that she can revive. She is best used in Guild Wars defense teams and World Arena, as the former two separate battles with 3 team members in each party gives her a higher chance to revive any damage dealing threat in the defense team; while the later involves facing actual players that utilize her kit to the maximum potential.
• Basar is considered one of the most powerful openers for many cleave teams due to his ability to dispel all buffs, apply the unbuffable debuff, and pushback the entire enemy team's Combat Readiness all in one ability, Sandstorm. While this can be countered with a good amount of Effect Resistance, this does not matter at all because he can ignore Effect Resistance with his Soulburn (hence which is why Effect Resistance is considered to be one of the most useless stats in PVP), meaning he'll guarantee the dispell buff, applying the unbuffable debuff, and pushback all in once, even against fire units. While his most optimal builds involve a mix of Attack, Effectiveness, and Speed for his other abilities (such as the applying attack down and decrease hit chance debuffs on all enemies, and transferring and debuffs to an enemy), Basar only needs one stat and one stat only, speed. Heck, he doesn't need to be promoted to a 6* to be good, he just needs a lot of speed to be a strong opener for cleave teams. His opener can be followed up with someone who can apply defense down debuff on the entire enemy team (i.e. Tenebria and Bellona) and follow up with a cleaver that has good speed scaling (i.e. Vildred) or any cleaver with a Speed/Crit set to clean up the entire enemy team, meaning the only way to deal with Basar cleave openers is to tank through his entire onslaught (which is very hard to do). Worse yet, if he is equipped with a maxed out Tagehel's Ancient Book (an Artifact that gives the player 20 souls), he can immediately use it's soulburn effect on Sandstorm. In fact, his opener is so powerful that several units were made (i.e. Holiday Yufine and Lilias) or received Balance Buff changes (i.e. Ambitious Tywin) to counter his opener. He even considered one of the most banned units in World Arena for this very reason.
• When facing a unit in defense teams, Charles is considered to be one of the scariest characters to deal with. Don't let his Knight class fool you, he's one of the few Knight characters that can be built as a Lightning Bruiser in class that is generally built Stone Wall (the other being Fighter Maya, Lilias, Fallen Cecilia, and Charlotte; but none of them can match this status like Charles himself). Why is he feared? This is because his entire kit synergizes well with the Counter set. When he attacks with a basic attack, he has a chance to follow up with his second skill, Smash, which the chance of triggering increases if the target he attacks is buffed. The said second skill, Smash, can dispel all buffs on an enemy and the damages increases based on how many buffs he has. Keep in mind, all of this can be triggered with a counterattack. The said basic attack can apply attack down debuff as well, nullifying any damage to a cleaver. Worse yet, if he's equipped with the Elbris Ritual Sword artifact, he can trigger a counterattack if an ally of his is attacked, ensuring that his Smash followup will be very devastating if the ally tries to cleave him. And that's not all, his utlimate ability, Faithful Strike, applies an attack buff to all his allies and a defense buff to himself, making him even harder to kill as well damaging the entire enemy team. The only drawback for Charles is that he needs specific gear to be effective (more specifically, he needs to be in Counter/Immunity set with a good distribution of offensive and defensive stats; and his performance is dependent on Elbris Ritual Sword), but a well built Charles will correct millions of spines of any cleave teams.

I've chose these examples because those were the most lengthly edits I've made from the GameBreaker.Epic Seven. If you were to rewrite these examples or correct the grammar of these entries, how would you do it?

EDIT: Feel free to add/remove examples from this page I'll I'm still suspended from editing TV Tropes, but I was wondering how you would have rewritten these examples if I were to add/remove examples from this page.

Edited by DarkPaladinX on Oct 8th 2020 at 7:40:17 AM

^

Note: as per my standard practice, to conserve space I will be deleting anything I'm not correcting.

Two general comments:

• You write in a very wordy manner, which makes your entries Walls of Text. You should try to condense and streamline your writing to include only the most important information and not include irrelevant comments (Word Cruft).
• There was quite a lot of game jargon in your entries. Since I'm not familiar with the Epic Seven game, I have no idea whether some wording is wrong because of lack of English knowledge or because that's the way the game uses it.

Maid Chloe is also an annoying Moonlight healer to deal with in Arena defense teams, mainly because of her ultimate ability, VIP Treatment, which not only revives all allies but provides all allies with an attack buff...In fact, her very ability of being able to revive all allies and provide the entire team with an attack buff makes her relatively difficult to deal with for most cleave teams, <- comma to the point that Sinful Angelica, a 4* Dark Soul Weaver, was specifically designed for cleave teams to counter her gimmicks. (alongside Sinful Angelica being an answer to Ruele in a lesser extent)

^ I deleted the "alongside Sinful Angelica..." bit because it doesn't have anything to do with the character's abilities.

...revive an allied party member (the other being Maid Chloe's VIP Treatment for the entire team, albeit reviving allies with far less health). Unlike Maid Chloe, she can revive the said ally with full health and invincibility, allowing them to survive another turn...Since her healing is based on her maximum health and her ultimate ability heals the ally to full health and invincibility...Her only drawback is her very poor AI, meaning she's not well suited to Arena defense teams unless if the player...with 3 team members in each party give her a higher chance to revive any damage dealing threat in the defense team, <- comma while the latter involves facing actual players, <- comma which utilizes her kit to the maximum potential.

...he can ignore Effect Resistance with his Soulburn (hence which is why...for his other abilities (such as the applying attack down and decreasing hit chance debuffs on all enemies, and transferring and debuffs to an enemy), Basar only needs one stat and one stat only, speed...His opener can be followed up with someone who can apply a defense down debuff...he can immediately use its soulburn effect on Sandstorm...He is considered one...

The said second skill, Smash, can dispel all buffs on an enemy and the damage increases based on how many buffs he has...And that's not all, his ultimate ability, Faithful Strike, applies an attack buff to all of his allies...offensive and defensive stats <- no semi-colon and his performance...

I've chosen these examples because they were the most lengthy edits I've made from the game.

EDIT: Feel free to add/remove examples from this page. <- period I'll I'm...

Edited by Arivne on Oct 8th 2020 at 8:44:02 AM

Yeah, I think the Word Cruft is the biggest problem with my edits since I tend to be very lengthily and detailed on my edits. Do you think if I shorten my additions to be more condensed and streamlined, then I'm less prone to grammatical errors?

Also, I think the biggest problem with my edits here is that how I wrote my entries is indicting that the reader knows about Epic Seven when I should try I write it towards a more general audience. Do you think if I had shortened my entries a bit to be more general rather than being too long and detailed, it would help improve my grammar a bit?

^

"Do you think if I shorten my additions to be more condensed and streamlined, then I'm less prone to grammatical errors?"

"Do you think if I had shortened my entries a bit to be more general rather than being too long and detailed, it would help improve my grammar a bit? "

^ It couldn't hurt. :)

Edited by Arivne on Oct 8th 2020 at 8:45:34 AM

Thanks, if I'm going to provide examples of a particular trope, I should probably keep them short and simple.

Actually, come to think it, I think the Game-Breaker and Tier Induced Scrappy pages may need some cleanup, going to start up a thread on this.

Black Butler

• Scenery Censor: In Chapter 186, when Ran Mao destroys the entire secret underground faculty completely naked, the chapter makes sure to cover up her private parts with various objects.

Blake Butler Characters

• Full-Frontal Assault: Ran Mao destroys the entire secret underground faculty completely naked instead of covering herself up.

Edited by Stardust120 on Oct 8th 2020 at 12:20:09 PM

Scenery Censor: In chapter 186, when Ran Mao destroys the secret underground faculty completely naked, the artist makes sure to cover up her private parts with various objects.

Full-Frontal Assault: Ran Mao destroys the secret underground faculty completely naked.

I shortened it a bit, but the grammar's good. Oh, and you shouldn't place either under Characters, since Character pages are for character traits mainly, and not for everything a character says or does.

Edited by MichaelKatsuro on Oct 8th 2020 at 11:49:13 AM

Planning on creating a creator page for Japanese author and illustrator Takashi Yanase. While he's unknown outside of Japan, I felt like creating a page dedicated to him since he's very respected in Japan (similar to Dr Seuss and Roald Dahl). However I'm not Japanese so this page is going to need a lot of work in the future. But here's my description for this author.

_________________________________________________________________________

Takashi Yanase was a Japanese children's book author and illustrator, best known as the creator of the long running preschool series Anpanman and the children's book "Chirin No Suzu" ("Chirin's Bell"). Some of his works (such as The Kindly Lion and Chirin's Bell) are notable for touching on heavy and depressing subject matter.

After serving in World War 2, he suffered a severe case of PTSD and decided to became a children's book illustrator and author as his way of coping. His book Chirin No Suzu was loosely based on the his experiences in World War 2.

Takashi Yanase passed away on 2014 after a long period of sickness. After his death, a special museum was opened in his memory called "Kami City Takashi Yanase Memorial Hall & Anpanman Museum" which was dedicated to him and his works. In 2015, the museum held a special exhibit dedicated to Chirin's Bell featuring artwork and sketches which ran from February 11, 2015 till May 11, 2015.◊

More information on the Anpanman franchise can be seen here.

Children's books

• The Kindly Lion (aka The Gentle Lion)
• Chirin no Suzu (known as Ringing Bell in anglophone regions): An English translation can be read here.
• Little Jumbo

Takashi Yanase's works provide examples of:

• Animated Adaptation: Three of his children's book would be later told in animated form.
  • The Kindly Lion received an animated short in 1969 that was 26 minutes long.
  • Little Jumbo also gained an animated short in 1977 that was 27 minutes long.
  • Chirin No Suzu was turned into a 46 minute feature film by Sanrio Animation which later gained an English Dub in 1983.
• Adaptation Expansion: The 1978 movie adaptation of Chirin's Bell expanded more on the original story. Such as Chirin and Woe's relationship, a scene where Chirin tries to be helpful with a mother bird and protecting it's eggs. The 1977 Lyrica adaptation expanded more on Chirin's life (such as his birth and more moments with his mother).
• Comic-Book Adaptation: The now defunct magazine "Lyrica" made a comic adaptation of Chirin No Suzu in 1977, a year before the movie adaptation was released in theaters.
• Sweet Sheep: Chirin starts out as a carefree and cheerful lamb, until his life takes a tragic turn after his mother's murder.
• Very Loosely Based on a True Story: Chirin's Bell is loosely based on Takashi's experiences in WWII. Woe the Wolf is seen as an allegory for war, Chirin for children and orphans effect by war, and Chirin's Mother for deceased parents and love ones who died during the war.
• Savage Wolf: Woe/The Wolf King is extremely creepy and not friendly with Chirin and the other animals at all. In the film adaptation, he becomes Chirin's mentor.

Edited by brb1006 on Oct 8th 2020 at 1:23:38 PM

Alright! I have a few suggestions for the description, which I'll put right here.

Takashi Yanase was a Japanese children's book author and illustrator. He was best known as the creator of the long running preschool series Anpanman and the children's book "Chirin No Suzu" ("Chirin's Bell"). Some of his works (such as The Kindly Lion and Chirin's Bell) are notable for touching on heavy and depressing subject matter.

After serving in World War 2, he suffered a severe case of PTSD and decided to became a children's book illustrator and author (NOTE: While "illustrator and author" is technically correct, I would say that putting it in alphabetical order and saying "author and illustrator" flows off the tongue better.) as his way of coping. His book Chirin No Suzu was loosely based on the his experiences in World War 2.

Takashi Yanase passed away in 2014 after a long period of sickness. After his death, a special museum was opened in his memory called "Kami City Takashi Yanase Memorial Hall & Anpanman Museum", which was dedicated to him and his works. In 2015, the museum held a special exhibit dedicated to Chirin's Bell featuring artwork and sketches, which ran from February 11, 2015 till May 11, 2015.

@brb1006

And here is the Examples section.

Changed verbs from past to present tense as per How to Write an Example - Write in Historical Present Tense.

Three of his children's books would be later adapted to animated form.

...which later gained an English dub in 1983.

The 1978 movie adaptation of Chirin's Bell expands more on the original story, <- comma such as Chirin and Woe's relationship <- no comma and a scene where Chirin tries to be helpful to a mother bird and protect its eggs.

^ This sentence was incorrectly split into two sentences. The 2nd sentence ("Such as Chirin...") was a sentence fragment which couldn't stand by itself.

...Chirin for children and orphans affected by war, and Chirin's mother for deceased parents and loved ones who died during the war.

Edited by Arivne on Oct 9th 2020 at 9:18:05 AM

Can't alert the tropers so I'll put this here. —-

Under the trope, Pride, in the Jedi character entry, there this tangent which I think is a rather bias interpretation of them, not an objective observation of them in the current canon. Since it's never concretely confirmed in-universe.

I think it may require some editing or be omitted. Since it may qualify as YMMV.

https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Characters/StarWarsJediOrder

This was the defining characteristic of the Jedi Order. They came to believe themselves the true agents of the Force along with the fact that their connection to the Force and being part of such an ancient venerable order gave them the right to police the universe, they knew best above everyone else because of their power in the Force, and they were servants of the will of the Force. In truth, the Jedi Order towards its end was nothing more than an extension of the Galactic Republic and its members were a bunch of self-rightious ascetics and monks that really only acted as agents of the Galactic Republic. They were more concerned with keeping in the good graces of the Galactic Republic and helping it to endure. They failed to realize that the Galactic Republic was just a government that would rise and fall, but that the Force was eternal. If the Jedi were truly the protectors, they made themselves out to be they would have been a bunch of This example contains a YMMV entry. It should be moved to the YMMV tab.Neutral Good, Knight Errant, Humble Heroes that went out to actively defend the weak while stopping the guilty all the while saying Screw the Rules, I'm Doing What's Right!. Ironically, the one Jedi who acted the way they should have and Palpatine would have wanted out of the way the most was Qui-Gon Jinn. He was the only one going out to figure out what's what and get wise to the Sith's return before anyone else. This is probably why he was killed off, as it's very likely that Qui-Gon would have been a Spanner in the Works for Palpatine.

Far as I can recall the closest we get to anything like that is some self-critism from Yoda in Star Wars Rebels.And he makes no mention of things being better off if they did not serve the Republic.

Given that government was, regardless of its flaws, their best medium to protect the galaxys people. That above reasoning doesn't track, since that has always been portrayed as their their greatest duty.

Edited by Avenger09 on Oct 9th 2020 at 11:14:50 AM

Anvenger: That's not really what this thread is for. You're supposed to post specific sentences you've written here, for correction. That's it.

You can take that to Is this an example? instead.

Riddle School - Character (Messie)

• Added Alliterative Appeal: If Phil stops talking to him, he tells him "Beat it bowling ball brain.".

The Legend Of Zelda CD-i games - YMMV

• Memetic Personality Change: Memes tend to portray Lord Kiro as some kind of embodiment of Undying Loyalty since all the cutscenes he appears in either have him calling the Duke Onkled a traitor or saying he'll keep an eye on him.

Madness Combat - Character (Deimos)

• Faster Than They Look: In ''DedmosRebuilt", he gains a new form where his jaw, chest and hands are covered in rocks, while one may expect him to be a literal Stone Wall, he quickly prove that he have even more agility than before, can do fast and strong punches, and even jump and dash in a direction while in the air. And being half-rock does not hinder his ability to avoid bullets at all.

Eye Beams

• The Right Hand Man from the Henry Stickmin Series can shoot lasers from his left eye in any route of Completing the Mission where he's a cyborg.

Henry Stickmin Series - Character (Toppat clan)

• One-Steve Limit: Averted, there are two members named Thomas, Thomas Chestershire and Thomas Chipz.

• Added Alliterative Appeal: If Phil stops talking to Messie, Messie tells him "Beat it, bowling ball brain." (Also, this isn't a character trope. Not unless Messie very frequently talks in alliteration.)

• Memetic Personality Change: Memes tend to portray Lord Kiro as some kind of embodiment of Undying Loyalty, since all the cutscenes he appears in either have him calling the Duke Onkled a traitor or saying he'll keep an eye on him.

• Faster Than They Look: In ''Dedmos Rebuilt", he gains a new form where his jaw, chest and hands are covered in rocks. While one may expect him to be a literal Stone Wall, he quickly proves that he's even more agile than before, can throw fast and strong punches, and can even jump and dash while in the air. And being half-rock does not hinder his ability to avoid bullets at all.

("In a direction" seems pointless. If he's jumping and dashing, obviously he must be doing it in a direction.)

• The Right Hand Man from the Henry Stickmin Series can shoot lasers from his left eye in any route of Completing the Mission where he's a cyborg.

• One-Steve Limit: Averted. There are two members named Thomas: Thomas Chestershire and Thomas Chipz.

I have decided that I should be forcing of fixing Wildflower (2017) and their character page. So I kinda need help with my new examples.

• Big Bad: Of the entire series. A Corrupt Politician who abused his power and is responsible for deaths of several people including Lily's father Dante.
• Bittersweet Ending: On the bright side. The Ardiente is defeated and Liliy finally make peace with her family, friends, and the town as she becomes a Senator and Presidential candidate. But on the down side, it cost lives of many people including Carlotta and Lily's Love Interest Diego. Not to mention Emilia, who survived getting shot by Julio is now crippled and the sole family member of The Ardiente who survived as she is forgiven by Lily.

Edited by Bubblepig on Oct 10th 2020 at 11:25:58 AM

I have decided that I should try to fix Wildflower (2017) and its character page.

A Corrupt Politician who abuses his power and is responsible for the deaths of several people, <- comma including Lily's father Dante.

^ Changed a verb from past to present tense as per How to Write an Example - Write in Historical Present Tense.

The Ardiente is defeated and Lily finally makes peace with her family, friends, and the town as she becomes a Senator and Presidential candidate. But on the down side <- no comma it costs the lives of many people, <- comma including Carlotta and Lily's Love Interest Diego. Not to mention Emilia, who survives getting shot by Julio but is now crippled and the sole family member of The Ardiente who survived, <- comma as she is forgiven by Lily.

^ The phrase "as she is forgiven by Lily" doesn't fit with the rest of the sentence. Unless it's important somehow, it can just be deleted.

What I mean is in prison, Emilia get a surprise birthday visitor from Lily herself (They were enemies). Lily made peace with her rival and forgive her. That's what I mean. Probably gonna change the sentence or delete if it doesn't fit. Thank you for helping me.

Edited by Bubblepig on Oct 11th 2020 at 9:53:00 AM

For the empty Video Game/Anachronox character page. I've rewritten their descriptions in my own words. How'd I do?

Edited by Avenger09 on Oct 11th 2020 at 3:21:29 PM

On Avoid the Dreaded G Rating (this is my last edit before I call some of the Image Suggestions crowner and put this site on the blocklist):

However, in 2011, Cars 2 got the G rating, despite having intense violence on par with The Incredibles, and in 2017, Cars 3 was also rated G even with slightly more mature content than the first film.

Edited by PrincessPandaTrope on Oct 12th 2020 at 11:17:00 AM