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10: Godzilla VS Barkley
11: Uncanny X-Men # 423
Linkara: Some of us believe in God and don't have a problem with other people's beliefs unless those beliefs are the ones that say you should kill people for your beliefs! Believe it!Title Card: My apologies to Naruto fans everywhere.
- The Continuity Alarm, which keeps going off even after Linkara has unplugged it.
12: Uncanny X-Men # 424
- After saying that the pope of the Church of Humanity is a woman, Linkara says that she could be a dog pulling switches and it will make no differences.
- The opening, which is a "Previously On" montage that contains such gems as Doctor Insano coming up with Insane Troll Logic schemes, MarzGurl betraying Linkara for Joseph Stalin, and Linkara doing spoofs of his "'I AM A MAN!!!" Running Gag.
"I AM A MAN!!! (Cue "Punch", and pulling something from Behind the Black) ...Hey, cool, a Digivice!)
13: Mr. T and the T Force # 1
- "Mr. T sees you in your sleep. Mr. T sees you in your NIGHTMARES."
- "I'm the terror that beats your sucka ass in the night."
- "Mr. T is Sylvester Stallone in: John T. Rambo.
- "OUR DECIBEL LEVEL IS WHAT MAKES US SO TOUGH!"
- "Theatricality and deception are powerful agents."
- "So Mr. T is like quantum physics."
- "Yes... strip for Mr. T."
- "Sweet Christmas, foo'."
- The Mr. T Superpower Count.
- "IT'S A CRACK BABY FOO'!"
- And Linkara's follow-up "I wanna laugh, but I'm afraid I'll either get sent to Hell or Mr. T will show up and start pummeling me..."
14: Star Trek # 1
- All of Linkara's William Shatner impressions:
- "What do you mean...Starfleet's not going to...reimburse me for my ripped shirts any more?"
- "While I've got them, let me tell them about the...incredible...offers from Priceline.com."
- There's a moment in the comic where a fight breaks out and one of the participants falls into Captain Kirk as he's walking by.
Captain Kirk: Is it your intention to sit out this tour on my lap, Ensign?Linkara: Is that an invitation, Captain?
15: Newmen # 1
- "I guess if I was the only one to believe in Bubblegum Hinduism, I'd be a little off in the head too."
- Linkara's disregard of a "tormented" rant:
Linkara: Oh, boo-hoo, We've all got problems!
- This is made even funnier two years later in his "Top 15 Jokes from Atop the Fourth Wall" when you find out that he did the review just so he could make that joke.
16: NFL Superpro # 1
- Because Spider-Man makes a guest appearance in the issue and the audience has been bringing up the issue that he's been making too many One More Day jokes, Linkara tries to diminish the amount of said jokes by telling the Continuity Alarm to administer a painful electric shock every time he attempts one. Naturally, this leads to a world of hurt for him throughout the review.
Spider-Man: Reminds me of how tough things were for me before I had my wife, Mary Jane, to confide in.Linkara!Spider-Man: And it's a good thing I have a wife I can tell this to, because it'd certainly suck if the devil were to undo it all and continuity would be all fu-- (gets zapped) GAAAAAAHHHHHH! IT SLIPPED! I'M SORRY!
- When SuperPro calls a guy named Ken to pick him up, Spidey takes pictures, happy the guy has a partner and considering what his own life used to be like.
- As Linkara begins reading:
The narration box: Nighttime in Los Angeles.Linkara: The hookers are a little less trampy.
18-21: Amazons Attack
- Linkara reviews Amazons Attack: "Hello, Doom's IV? I'm sorry. I want you back!"
- In part two, when he does his trademark "I am a MAN!" and punches off screen. His hand inexplicably returns holding a teddy bear, causing him to announce "Bear!" in an ecstatic voice.
- Linkara completely snapping under the realization that the whole thing was just a tie-in to Countdown.
Linkara: [waving around bunny statue] Look at the pretty bunny, look at the pretty bunny! [breaks down crying]
Linkara: [trying to cut his wrists with a gun] Why doesn't it work?!
- Just the entirety of his spaz-out during the review.
- After he decides burying his face in a pillow is preferable to going on: "And yet somehow this is still more entertaining than the comic itself."
- Also, this exchange:
Aide in comic: D.C. is in ruins.Linkara: Well, after this comic it certainly is.
President: Yes! I killed a teenage girl! Why do other politicians seem to have so much trouble with it?
- Linkara's impression of The President, which is a full-throttle "Dubya" based on the comics' unsubtle (and implausible) "satire" of the Bush Administration, and The War on Terror. One moment that stands out is when The President is explaining why he should enact the McCarren Act (in spite of the obvious fact that rounding up "suspicious" citizens would be illogical when the Amazonians are already invading the entire country). After Linkara gives a Flat "What." to when the McCarren Act is mentioned, The President goes into a Motive Rant, and it cuts back-and-forth between The President talking, and Linkara chugging down pain-pills and booze, before putting the Magic Gun to his head, all while The President continues talking over Linkara's actions!
- Bees. My God.
- "Can someone please tell me what emotion Batman is expressing with that line? Confusion? Irony? Sadness? Anger? Acceptance? Disgust? Surprise? Anticipation? Contempt? Awe? Disappointment? Shame? Sympathy? Rage?! Oh, wait, that's me. Agony? Frustration? Apathy? It's apathy, isn't it? (Sighs) OK, you don't care, Batman, so we don't either."
- The plot breaking Pollo.
- "Yee-haw! Early retahment!"
- In his last Amazons Attack video, his musical Shout-Out to a certain drum-loving nutcase while mocking one of Circe's hammy Info Dumps.
- Linkara's response when Circe says that she used a piece of her soul in the resurrection of Hyppolita to turn her evil
Linkara: Free will? Load of crap, you're just born evil. *Beat* This is my CLUE STICK!!! (proceeds to hit the screen)
- "CRAP IN HEAVEN, HOW MUCH LONGER IS THIS?!" from Part 2.
- "Corporate accounts payable, Batman speaking. Just a moment. Corporate accounts payable, Batman speaking. Just a moment."
22: Sultry Teenage Super Foxes # 1
- "As for the cover itself, we have our four protagonists, who are apparently sultry, teenage, super, and foxes. I suspect that one woman's hair on the left is a fox, but I'm not seeing it with the others."
- "Um, Cindy, the comic's the other way, could you turn around?"
Narrator: July. It means summer heat and clear blue skies here at Rutgers Air Force Base.Linkara!Narrator: August, on the other hand, means a filthy obscenity. And don't even get me started on what September means.
Narrator: July is spent gazing dreamily at the cream of American manhood.Linkara: Okay, don't say "cream" or "manhood" ever again, okay?
- His names for the characters which include "Girl with Hair from Thunder Cats" and "Murphy Brown".
Linkara: So now you know. And Knowing Is Half the Battle.(NBC "The More You Know" logo appears)Linkara: Wait, wait, that was supposed to be the G.I. Joe music!Offscreen voice: Eh, we'll fix it in post.Linkara: You better! So now, back to our—Music: ♪G. I. Joe!♪Linkara: A little late for it!
- Upon seeing a sign labeled "French-style entertainment", he cues footage of Benzaie dancing.
- "And for some reason that just baffles the mind, the narrator then asks, 'Mommy, it followed me home. Can I keep it?' Oh no! The writer's having flashbacks back to their childhood! Take cover!"
Scientist: I mean, consider the transmutation of living tissue! Men into supermen! The power of creation could be in our grasp!Linkara: My God! We could make Hardee's into edible food!
Narrator: Jasmine is now the bride of fire.Linkara!Jasmine: This relationship is suffocating me! Literally!
- I just about died laughing during his April Fools' Day Watchmen review as "Lester B. Bum."
"You got to give me change! Or the giant naked blue wang will join forces with the giant squid and eat me!"
- "I went to Mars once!!"
- "It was chocolatey."
- "I've got a giant naked blue wang! But not where you think."
- Pulling off a perfectly timed "OF COURSE!" while omitting the expected Street Fighter clip only makes it that much more entertaining.
23: Top 15 Worst Heroes Becoming Villains
- So, when your home city gets blown up by an alien despot, it can really ruin your weekend. To Hal Jordan it was, needless to say, the most traumatic thing that could conceivably happen to him. SO HE GOES ON A KILLING SPREE AND MURDERS EVERYONE IN THE GREEN LANTERN CORPS, COLLECTING THEIR POWER RINGS WHILE LAUGHING MANIACALLY, TO GAIN EVERY BIT OF THEIR POWER! MWA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HAA!!!
- Linkara's opening rant about the state of the world, growing in intensity and pitch and culminating with, "It just... it just makes you wanna... [Distorted Voice] DESTROY THE WORLD!!!" [*massive Scare Chord*]
- "Yeah, that wave of anti-matter that destroyed the universe was a pain in the ass to clean up the next day, let me tell you."
- 'Villains are a superstitious cowardly lot, so let me take in my cave to put them in tiny shorts to fight crime' * The Ambigulously Gay Duo*
- About Magneto's second kinda-Face–Heel Turn: “However, as is the case with comic continuity, Magneto supposedly died, but then it turns out that he just faked his death by impersonating a new character, and it was all some plan to Take Over the World and engage in hypocritical acts before he's killed again, but then it turns out it's not really him, and-the-character-he-made-up-was-actually-a-real-person-who's-still-alive-so-Magneto-was-actually-some-guy-impersonating-another-guy-impersonating-Magneto." (*Stunned Silence*) "And comic companies wonder why it's so hard for new readers to get into comics!"
- "The only thing to fear... is a giant yellow space bug that might turn you into a mass-murdering psychopath."
- Speaking about the retcon DC did on Monarch's identity: "Correcting our own mistakes! EXTREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEME ISN'T IT!?"
24: Daredevil # 305
Daredevil: Life turns cheap, then it turns up in the emergency room.Linkara: Dear Lord, the fact that they even used a "Life is cheap" line is just dorky. But hey, at least it wasn't "Life is cheap in the big city," or something - oh wait, Daredevil uses it in the last panel of the page. I really should just give up right here.
- After losing patience with Daredevil's noir-esque narration:
Linkara: Honestly, just imagine if I had some stupid narrator like that. It wouldn't be dramatic, it'd be annoying.Narrator: He sits on his futon, green like the blood of a Star Trek Vulcan. He thinks he and he alone knows the pain and suffering that results from- (Linkara shoots upwards with the Magic Gun, shutting him up).
- He comes back to narrate the credits, at which point Linkara yells at him to get him a drink. He narrates that as well.
25: Daredevil # 306
- Linkara: Hey, kids! Remember, when you're about to engage a deadly foe, be sure to shout their last name before falling down at them. We saw this technique briefly, during Mr. T and the T-Force, but it's good to see another demonstration here. [Falls down from the ceiling] Kutter!
- The blooper at the end of the review:
Nostalgia Chick: "And you're too late to stop the bomb... in my pants."
Wolverine: Adamantium Rage
- Later, Linkara tries his hands of videogame in Wolverine: Adamantium Rage. Mid-way, he starts going batshit, using a variation his "I AM A MAN!" * punch* gag, with replacing the quote with "ADAMANTIUM RAGE!". He knocks Spoony out, and pretty much everything else... until he met The Angry Video Game Nerd.
Linkara: ADAMANTIUM RAGE!!!AVGN: ''* punches Linkara in the face*
- And later, Linkara encounters Doctor Insano, and believes he's figured out his true identity.
Linkara: Wait a second!....You're That Chick With The Goggles!Insano: ....I'm not fricking black!Linkara: But you are a woman?
- And later, Linkara encounters Doctor Insano, and believes he's figured out his true identity.
- At one point Linkara gets so frustrated that he decides to resort to cheat codes, upon which Spoony, who had up until then been sitting in the background playing a DS, calls him a wimp, so Linkara gives him a go. Spoony is gradually driven insane and tries to strangle himself with the laptop's power cord, finally resulting in this:
Spoony: Fine, you can use the fuckin' cheats!
- CHEAT CODES ARE STILL ENABLED
- "I heard that, Linkara."
- At the end of the review he says "This game sucks!" as he holds up one hand as though it's holding a real object. It's funny because it's not a comic, and it's funny because he doesn't actually own a physical copy of the game; he was using an emulator. But force of habit made him do the hand gesture anyway.
- "Brother, not mother. Idiot."
Warrior # 1
- Pretty much the entirety of Linkara and Spoony's review of Warrior #1, a comic so absolutely horrible that Dr. Insano used it to shatter space-time, resulting in the review occurring over the course of multiple weird alternate universes, including ones where Linkara and Spoony switch places, where Spoony has Benzaie's hair and Linkara has Angry Joe's beard, one where Linkara and Spoony are teddy bears, another where Linkara and Spoony can't act and have to read directly from the script, and one where there's this psychotic fusion of Linkara, Insano, and Chester A. Bum.
- Also, the constant, horrible abuse of the ellipses, culminating in:
Nostalgia Critic: "STOP! USING! ELLIPSES!"
- Also, the constant, horrible abuse of the ellipses, culminating in:
- "He raped Santa!"
- Angry Joe: "Hold it! Nobody rapes Santa on our watch!"
- Dr. Insan-Ohki: I'm adorable but alone.
- "Oh, don't be so negative."
- "Emperor Spoonus Maximus demands that one of these narrators be silent immediately. 'Tis most annoying, rather like listening to Socrates give his forum stand-up routine while attending a Senate meeting."
- Having some Fun with Subtitles with the Ultimate Warrior's promos, HOAK HOGAN!
- This exchange:
Linksano: (laughs evilly) It worked! My hypertime destabilization experiment was a complete success! [Beat] Well, sort of, my hair's a different color.Linkara!Spoony: Doctor Insano!
31: New Guardians # 2
- Everything having to do with Snowflame in his New Guardians review.
Snowflame: I am SNOWFLAME! Every cell of my being burns with white-hot ecstasy! COCAINE IS MY GOD AND I AM THE HUMAN INSTRUMENT OF ITS WILL!"Linkara: (befuddled look) Ladies and gentlemen, I can say without a hint of irony that is the crackiest thing I have ever seen in a comic, and I've seen Jetpack Hitler and ancient Kandarian book being used as toilet paper by zombie superheros! In fact, that statement is so bloody ridiculous, insane, and bad, that it's freaking awesome! Snowflame, the man powered by cocaine, is win of the highest level!
- "How dare our enemy not be impressed with repeated punching! We worked really hard on that!"
33: Secret Defender # 9
- "The cover here is — AAGH, MY EYES!"
Doctor Strange: Why have you come to the house of DOCTOR STRANGE?Linkara: And his name is in red and made huge, as if he routinely walks around talking about himself in the most dramatic manner possible. I wonder if he does this in real life, too.Linkara!Doctor Strange: DOCTOR STRANGE demands his mocha double latte!
34: Secret Defender # 10
- The entire opening:
Narrator: Previously On Atop the Fourth Wall:Linkara Well, let's dig into Secret Defenders #9 and and I'll show you.(Cut to Linkara holding a Dogbert plush in one hand, a sword in the other)Linkara: Of course! The bombs were secretly hidden in the coconuts the entire… the entire…Linkara: I'm sorry, I just can't do this.Phelous: (cocks a gun) Wait, what? What's the matter?Linkara: Phelous, this is an important episode. Everyone loves these "previously on" segments and this is gonna premiere the theme song! But what I'm being told is that we could only spring for one guest star.Phelous: Yep, well… everyone's been pretty busy since the Brawl. Hell, I can really only give you five minutes.Linkara: But how is this gonna look to the fans? "Oh, he can only bring in one other guy! Clearly Channel Awesome is trying to shun the stupid comic book guy."Phelous (looking at watch) Uh huh, yeah… whoops! Sorry, Linkara, time's up.Linkara: B-b-but…Phelous: Yeah, well, you know how it is, especially when I have to film Street Fighter comedy. (grumbles and stomps off, spouting Angrish)Linkara Phelous! Dude, dude, I'm sorry! It was a joke, man… (sighs) Pollo, you wanna come here and save my bacon?Pollo: You just leave me out of this.(Linkara slumps back on the futon)Narrator: And now, the con—Linkara: Aw, shut up!
35: Superman vs. The Terminator # 1
- Linkara is preparing for his latest review, but is suddenly sent to the future due to Dr. Insano playing with hypertime.
- There's also the fact that his pants disappear from time-traveling (though he questions why the rest of his clothes are still there).note
- Also, thirty years from now, Future Linkara just now started to review Final Crisis, and still hasn't moved out of his parents' house. And he's wearing a different hat. Present Linkara goes back to change this, but all he changes is the hat his future self wears.
36-39: Countdown to Final Crisis
- At the beginning:
Linkara: (face in hands) I don't wanna' do it! I don't wanna' talk about it! And I don't wanna' review it! (takes face out of hands) But noooooooo, you people insisted! You just had to keep asking and requesting and demanding that I review this series! Weeeell, fiiiiiiine, you want a review, I'll give you your friggin' review!
- The whole "We should ''do'' something!" "Should we ''do'' something?" joke.
Linkara: YES, YOU SHOULD DO SOMETHING, YOU BORING IDIOTS!
Linkara: [The editors of Countdown] wanted to introduce a love triangle between Donna [Troy], Kyle [Rayner] and Jason [Todd].
(Cue the "Route 1" track from Pokémon, while a title card reading "Inaudible Profanity. Please stand by" covers the screen)
Linkara: (waving his gun around haphazardly) ...AND ROLL OVER THEIR FETID CARCASSES FOR THAT IDIOTIC IDEA!!. So, back to our story...
- Thank You Monitor! But Ray Palmer Is In Another Castle!
- "Do I even want to know what she's gonna do with that staff?"
- Every single time he does Superboy-Prime's whiny fanboy voice: "I don't want this Earth, bring back my Earth! Everything was better on my Earth! THEY'RE RUINING EVERYTHING!! I'll Kill You!! I'll kill you to DEATH!"
- His nicknames for Superboy-Prime, which include "Stupidboy-Prime", "Spasticboy-Prime", and "Stupidbitch-Pansy".
- The entire "Previously On" segment to the second part of the Countdown review. Whoever decided to have the BUM, of all people, control all the world's nukes was having a very good brain day.
- What made that whole segment, though, was the fact that it was a string of unconnected plots that had nothing to do with each other. It was extremely convoluted as well. And after all of that, the "Previously On" segment is capped with "And that whole thing STILL made more sense than Countdown!"
- "Damn it, [Donna,] stop pointing out the Plot Holes; that's my job!"
- His fear that many fans will knowingly say "This comic is Re-Todded."
- Linkara's reaction to the Source Wall writing a message on Jimmy Olsen's steamed bathroom mirror.
Linkara: Ewwww. The Source Wall is pervy.
- Forager taking off with Jimmy Olsen, sans pants, and Linkara's awkward response thereto.
- "COUNTDOWN, STOP KILLING EVERYONE!"
- "No other being dares to sit on couches like DARKSEID does!"
Darkseid (to Superman): YOU DARE?!Linkara!Superman: Yes, I dare! And when I am done with you, I will dare to sit on your couch!
40: Xena # 1
- When comparing the bland Xena cover to a flawed, but still more dynamic Amazing Spider-Man issue from the same month:
Linkara: On the Xena cover, you have this: "Oh, a bodybuilder pose. How fascinating." On the Spider-Man one, you have this: "Holy crap! Impossible Spine Lady— yeah, I know her name is Stunner, no need to comment on it—is holding Spidey by the neck while Dr. Octopus's mechanical tentacles are looming in on them and…" Wow, it really sounds like I'm describing a hentai comic, doesn't it?
Man in comic: Incredible. A single human that has all ten of the known endowments…Linkara: Endowments?(flips to front cover, zoom in on Xena's breasts)Linkara: Wow. Three panels in and they're already making a boob joke.
Mr. R: (facing away from the people he's talking to) She'll kill us all before long!Linkara: (with his back to the camera) I don't like fools who face people when they talk to 'em.
Xena: I'm no murderer… I simply punish… the guilty!Linkara!Xena: By killing them without due process! (Beat) Wait…Linkara: So Xena frags them all, and again, going off about justice and the law and stuff. You know, I don't need some crappy indie comic to do this. I can just watch that awful Sylvester Stallone movie version of Judge Dredd and get the same thing.(montage of Stallone as Dredd shouting "I am the law!")
- And right after it:
Linkara: Oh yeah, that was the end of the comic. And wow, what a comic, eh?I can just see the advertisements they must've made. "Never before will you learn so little about a character!" "The blandness just sizzles off the page!" "She likes to watch… and that's not nearly as exciting a concept as you'd think it is!"
- Next, when reading a preview comic from another work by the same publisher:
Luxura: I am the vampiress Luxura. Some of you may have missed my first appearance in '"Vamperotica'' #1.Linkara: Hi, I'm Troy McLuxura. You may remember me from such comics as Boobula and Interview with the Vampire Pornstar.
- His final word on the comic: "But hey, at least it isn't Countdown!"
41: Cable # 1
- After the latest indication of the evil to come from ancient Egypt, he cuts to a picture of the pyramids with the Imperial March playing.
- At the end of that review, he's interrupted in his final diatribe of "this comic sucks!" when Linkara-as-Cable bursts in demanding an explanation. Linkara throws a magnet at him to defeat him, then picks up Cable's gun and says "Sweet! New gun!"
- After a particularly convoluted series of flashbacks: LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN!
- "Cable — Time's up!!" "You lose 200 points, and control of the board goes to the next player!"
- The typo. "But Cable IS Styfe-" "Wait, Styfe?! STYFE?!"
43: Batman: Fortunate Son
- During Linkara's Batman: Fortunate Son review, he flips out and rants about how people who overuse the term 'selling out' are a bunch of naïve idiots. This doubles as a Crowning Moment of Awesome as well.
- His constant railing at Robin for nonsensically leaping to the defense of Izaak Crowe, the drug-addled rockstar Asshole Victim of the comic who commits many terrorist acts such as assaulting a TV station with a grenade, committing numerous offenses in the process (attempted murder being one of them), inciting riots and unrest, and other such psychotic acts while proclaiming "FREE! FREE!"
- "‘Punk’ is nothing but death...and crime...and the rage of a beast."
- Linkara's laughter right after that is also incredibly infectious.
- His reaction to the writers trying to retcon an event into Batman's backstory in which, while listening to rock 'n roll as a young Bruce Wayne, his father Thomas turns off the radio, stating that they don't listen to that sort of music in the Wayne household... an event which just so happened to take place on the same night they would be murdered.
Thomas Wayne: We don't listen to that sort of music in this house. Now you better get ready if you don't want to miss—Linkara: ...really? You're really going to pull the "on the same day my parents died" card?....... This is a dumb comic.
- A while into the video, Linkara finds them once more trying to tie Batman's hatred of rock 'n roll into his past: when he failed to stop a drugged-up Sid Vicious knockoff from killing his girlfriend in the midst of a rock music and drug-fueled frenzy. "THAT IS ENOUGH TO SPOOK THE DARK KNIGHT."
- While critiquing the rather Off Model way Gene Ha draws people's faces like they were 50 and Batman's cowl ears as stupidly long, he proclaims "I mean, it's about as convincing as this!" while dressed in the absolute worst Batman outfit ever consisting of what looks like a body-stocking or sock with holes cut in it and the Bat-Symbol slapped on it with glue.
- It Makes Sense in Context:
Batman (yes, the Batman): Pigs--From a gun.Linkara (Beat) What the Funk and Wagnall does that mean?!
- Linkara becomes so irritated with Izaak Crowe's constant whinging about how his life was too idyllic and privileged for a rockstar that he starts reading Crowe's lines with his Superboy Prime voice.
- "Lots of people see things when they're on drugs! When I'm on drugs, I see Bea Arthur!" *beat* "You should probably forget I said that."
- Try new "Review Cigarettes!" A review in every puff! This comic sucks.
- *In regards to the artwork of Gene Ha resulting in an indignant Robin looking like a horrifically preserved old man* "He proclaims that he's not a GAAAAAH! Robin, what the hell did they do to your face?! Batman, what's going on?!" *picture of a hilariously Off Model Batman with a bemused expression that's supposed to be derision, and comically long ears on his cowl.* "PAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Oh, my God! Thanks, Bruce. I needed that."
- "Or rather, Bat-Bunny if you can believe the art for his ears here..."
- His anger after mentioning the figures Crowe is seeing.
Linkara: Yeah, I don't know who any of these people are, and I am giving a request to all commenters: DON'T post about who they are. DON'T speculate. DON'T inform me. I do not care! At all! There's so much stupid in this book that it doesn't deserve any such speculation!
44: Air Raiders # 1
- While reading Air Raiders, Linkara comes across the phrase "great disaster" and freaks out over Countdown to Final Crisis again. He runs off, only to walk back onscreen and say "I knew I should have put a window there."
- "Um, look, guys, I think Spaceballs was joking about that "canned air" thing..."
45: Nightcat # 1
Zero Patrol # 1
- About Orion Smith, a stuntman.
Linkara: [reading the caption] "A man who understands his body". And judging by that haircut, I'm sure he "understands it" quite frequently.
- After the disembodied alien head tells one of the female characters, Lainie that she possesses "astounding mental powers that even she may not be aware of" as she's a psychiatrist:
Linkara as Lainie: (vacantly) I like toast!Linkara as the alien: Okay, maybe you're really not aware of it.
46: Blood Pack
- "Cut to women in their underwear. Ladies and gentlemen, the reason this comic was made!"
- "Superheroes are part actors, part boxers." "Part actors, part boxers. Hmm. Always knew Mr. T was a superhero."
- "@$#!! cameras everywhere!" "Paris Hilton finally fights back!"
- "Teenage girls love rebels." "Really, they love rebels, huh? Well, if this guy [picture of Edward from Twilight] constitutes a rebel, then Marlon Brando is spinning in his grave!"
- At one point, he refers to the character Ballistic as "Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever".
- "Huh, five idiots with superpowers, talking about recycling. This is just Captain Planet with an even more boring story."
- "This computer — no binary code I've ever seen — almost alien!" "My God, it's Linux based!"
48: Mickey Mantle # 2
- "Where have you gone, Joe DiMaggio? Our nation turns its lonely eyes to you. Woo woo woo!"
- "Minnesota once again here to save the day... MINNESOTA!"
- After the final hit by Mickey Mantle, as the triumphant music plays: "WOW! He did it! He hit the ball! He did it! They held the tension for all of one splash page! They did it! And I still don't care!
49: Adventures of the Kool-Aid Man # 1
- Linkara starts his review of a comic about The Kool-Aid Man with a horrified "WHY???"
- "The Kool-Aid Man sees you when you're sleeping. (leans in closer) The Kool-Aid Man sees you in your nightmares."
- The entirety of the review is pretty hilarious, especially his attempts to grasp the logic behind the Kool-Aid Man's world and his enemies.
50-52: Silent Hill: Dying Inside
- Defeating Pyramid Head by putting him in a Pokéball. Wonder if that will come in handy later...
- This gem from Part One when Troy Abernathy is being overly emo:
Troy: Another raging success story. And the only thing I want, she can't give me.Linkara: Proper auto insurance. Damn you, Progressive, you lied to me!
- Asking for the title card music to be replaced with something as far away from Silent Hill as possible, since the comics have nothing to do with the series. Cue "Footloose".
- Part Two of his review of Silent Hill: Dying Inside opens with an extraordinarily well-done pastiche of Silent Hill 2, with Linkara as James, 90s Kid as Maria, and Harvey Finevoice as Eddie. And more Ninja-Style Dancing!
- And the ending of Part Three! With the longest Punctuated! For! Emphasis! moment ever!
- His reaction to an unknown assailant interrupting the painfully annoying villain with a baseball bat: "It's Mickey Mantle! He's come to save us!"
- Linkara doing his own parody of Phantasmagoria: A Puzzle Of The Flesh. That is all.
- "Damn it, Insano! Stop goofing around for two seconds and put Spoony on the phone!"
- In the "Worst Ending" from the Silent Hill Alt Endings video, Linkara gets stuck in Phantasmagoria 2 and tries calling several numbers for help. 90s kid has an... interesting answering machine, Batman rants at him about rock music, and his call to Spoony gets Dr. Insano instead.
- The "UFO Ending," which features "Fly Me to the Moon"... sung by Harvey Finevoice. (The inevitable Evangelion flashbacks just make it even more hysterical) And then the credits get to the stinger text at the end, which is usually just a sentence or two, but this time is several paragraphs of ranting about the Fridge Logic inherent in the premise of Silent Hill 4.
- His parody of the Silent Hill 2 opening in the Dying Inside review. Especially 90's Kid as Maria and Pollo as Laura.
- His reaction to this line:
Christabella: Hey, Doc. I'm feeling all tingly in BAD PLACES. You know what that's all about?Linkara: What in the hell is up with this comic?!
53: Maximum Clonage
- His one year anniversary review of The Clone Saga is one of these:
Peter Parker: Should I really trust a jackal?Linkara: I don't know, Peter, maybe I should- (Pulls out a cane) HIT YOU WITH MY CLUE-STICK! (proceeds to hit the screen)
- His musical renditions of padding.
- When seeing Spidercyde's outfit he just starts laughing: "Perhaps the Jackal left his cloning tube in the sun too long."
- After revealing that it was originally planned for Mephisto to be behind the clone saga: "But the writers decided that Mephisto had absolutely no place in the Spider-Man universe. Yeah, hindsight's a bitch."
- "Do a little dance... make a little clone... get down tonight!"
- "The man responsible for our genetic future, ladies and gentlemen, with all the charm and personality of a 9-year old."
- "By Diehard's Crotch, what is up with that lady's face!?", "You guys look like Bratz dolls if they grew up!"
- His voice for the Jackal that sounds like The Monarch
- This little gem:
- His psychotic breakdown during to the final issue.
- "I see the way you're acting like somebody else gets me frustrated."
- "Fully baked!? What are clones made out of cookie dough!? You just slap a cookie cutter on a big mass of flesh, pop 'em in an Easy Bake Oven and wait two hours!?
- After Jackal "decides to do a little dance":
Linkara: (singing) Do a little dance... make a little clone... get down tonight!
Linkara: (as Punisher) I totally can! What, you don't believe me when I say I can? You don't think I can? (Beat, sad) Nobody thinks I'm cool anymore...!
- After Punisher claims to be able to shoot Jackal through Spider-Man and ends this claim with "I can, you know!"
- Also, The Stinger:
The Jackal: WHEEEEEE!
54: 22 Brides # 1
- "Yeah I'm a Bee Gees fan deal with it!"
Linkara: Wow, let me see if I can do that! * puts comic down, gets up and tries to do so* * CRACK!* MY SPINE!
- What, no mention of this gem?: Linkara notices the lack of sense that Libby makes when she kicks a man in the nads, all with enough force to knock the rest of the gang over. Linkara says?
55: All-Star Batman and Robin #1- 2
- Reading Frank Miller's descriptions of Vicki Vale in a deep voice. Complete with a caption assuring us that this is the actual script.
"I'm on a date with Bruce Wayne!"
- Crazy Steve, that is all.
- Whenever he narrates the characters repeating the same sentence over and over again. Something about the way he says it leaves me dying.
- This obvious, yet funny reference:
Vicki Vale: I hate the country. I hate bats.Raoul Duke: We can't stop here. This is bat country.
- Another obvious but funny one:
Bruce Wayne: There's no way out.Torgo: There is no way out of here. It will be dark soon. There is no way out of here.Joel: It'll be dark soon.
- His constant riffing of the comic's repeating dialogue.
Vicki Vale: It doesn't make any sense. It doesn't make any sense.Linkara: Vicki, I know it doesn't. Vicki, I know it doesn't.
Narrator: Vicki Vale. Columnist. Bearing witness.Linkara: Lewis Lovhaug. Comic book reviewer. Bearing the pain of this comic.
- Linkara wondering if anyone would narrate their life like Batman does in the comic. As a melodramatic, brooding narration voice suddenly interrupts him, Linkara promptly picks up a stick.
Linkara: (pokes the off-screen narrator with the stick) Get a job, ya hippie!Brooding Narrator: Aw! Hey! Stop poking me!
- "So sleep tight, punk." "Punk is nothing but death... and crime... and the rage of a beast."
- "I'm the goddamn Batman!" "Ladies and gentlemen, we have an internet meme!" (cue The Price Is Right theme)
- This exchange:
Batman: Who the hell do I think I am?Linkara: You're the goddamn — screw it, you knew where that was going.
- Linkara's giggling in response to Dick's "lameass Clint Eastwood impersonation" line, before playing a quick Batman Begins montage.
56: Doom # 1
- Linkara doing another parody of the "Random shooting in the dark" gag from Alone in the Dark (2005) during his review of the Doom comic book complete with cameo appearances by Lanipator, the Nostalgia Critic, Nostalgia Chick, Marzgurl, Benzaie, Beary, Angry Joe, and various other members of TGWTG. Even MikeJ makes a game effort.
Linkara: A little help here.
- Bennett the Sage and his Nerf gun is the best part.
- "I AM A MAN!" * PUNCH* "AND A HALF!" * PUNCH* * gets stuck halfway through*
"Oh, uh... bang, bang, bang... bang bang bang. Booom."
- My personal favourite was MikeJ part. He's looking at the others, cup of tea in a hand, then he sees the camera. His reaction?
- While holding the cup of tea like a gun, no less.
- "KNOCK KNOCK WHO'S THERE ME ME ME ME ME ME ME!"
Linkara: Oh, everything's about YOU, isn't it?
57: Spider-Man, Storm, & Cage
- The villain of the story, Smokescreen, makes himself known by announcing Storm's presence to his minions.
Storm: (thinking) That voice— where did it come from?(smoke begins to fill the room)Storm: (out loud) Some kind of... smoke... gas! But I can use my powers to—(Storm is hit in the back of the head with a loud KRAK)Linkara!Storm: (wobbling) Whoops, maybe I should have stuck to the thought bubbles... (flops over, unconscious)
58: Bimbos in Time # 1
- The intro to the review. Him pinching his sinuses, flatly stating the comic's title, and rolling to the credits.
- When showing footage of the movies made by the same director as the Bimbos in Time movie. A mulleted man gets attacked by a Zombie and Linkara yells "No! Not Jeff Foxworthy!"
- "Tim Curry?" Cue obligatory Sweet Transvestite joke.
- His impersonation of Dr. Frank N Furter.
- "Why is everybody in this comic a f*cking bimbo?!?!?!?!"
- "Of course! Don't you know anything about sci-"
Linkara: NO! That wasn't even remotely scientific!
- Linkara severely overthinks one character.
Linkara: "And she's the niece of Sherlock Holmes! ...Wait, does that mean Mycroft Holmes had a daughter? ...Why am I thinking about this?!?"
- "And I am the walrus, koo koo ka-choo!"
- Linkara repeatedly listening to music on his headphones to avoid having to read the comic.
- Linkara's response to one of the comic's "attempts" at "humor"
Linkara: "I'm only on page FOUR. This comic is FORTY-EIGHT PAGES LONG. Expect a lot of crying in this episode."
- Linkara's reaction to the "it's in my contract" joke - staring at the camera (apparently comatose) while the sad trombone plays.
Linkara: *shakes head* Sorry, must've slipped into a brief coma, was there a lame joke? Okay.
- Just the way he says "I had a dog named Ashley onec", before the Typo Counter immediately goes up.
- "By the way, this comic was a donation—AND I STILL FEEL LIKE I WAS RIPPED OFF!"
- "What looks like a nuclear explosion occurs. And for a second, there's that fleeting hope that maybe they're all dead and the comic's over. Especially when I see that one of the sound effects is 'poop'."
- His confused reaction to "I know so you Bimbo!!", resulting in the Typo Counter adding "???" to the end.
59: The Dark Knight Strikes Again Part 1
- Ninja-Style Dancer doing the Caramelldansen dance in Linkara's The Dark Knight Strikes Again part 1 review. Also:
"It's about to blow"
- When discussing how Frank Miller fans are likely to respond to his points, he borrows Yahtzee's style for a moment:
"Linkara, you handsome but completely inept dickweed!"
- Linkara decides to don a pair of "Brainy Specs" despite already wearing glasses.
"By the by, if you're expecting a raged filled review with lots of shouting bits you're probably going to be a bit dissapointed. Today we're putting on our brainy specs and doing an analysis. Like if I were a real reviewer instead of some loser who does video reviews of comicbooks on the internet."
- "We cut to the scene of a naked, muscular man in a beard fighting inhuman monsters…"
- Linkara making fun of Miller's way of emphasizing seemingly random words:
Superman: It's you. I know it's you. Nobody else could be so good at being crazy.
Linkara: You know, Frankie, emphasizing random words does not a talented writer make.
60: Extreme Super Christmas Special # 1
61: James Bond Jr. # 3
- Saying all of James Bond Jr.'s lines in a Sean Connery impression just to make them sound even more ridiculous.
- And then there's Linkara wondering why James Bond's nephew is called James Bond Jr.
- "Getting shipped to Peru in a tank does seem a bit far-fetched." "Geez, you know it's bad when the characters admit that the premise is weak."
- "Wow! Grass! We don't have anything like that outside the woods."
- "The James Bond Jr. Show will be right back after this ad for expensive crap you don't need."
- "Russian? French? German? Tommy Wiseau?"
62: Top 15 Missed Opportunities of AT 4 W
- Top 15 Missed Opportunities of AT4W: Two words; baseball cards.
Letters column: "Instead of having [superpowers], Mr. T uses his head to get himself out of tricky situations!"
- Ma-Ti's using Linkara's own 'I AM A MAN!' punch against him.
- The Mr. T and the T Force letters column:
Linkara: "Hmhmhmhmhmmmmmm!" * fingersnap* * Montage of the "Mr. T superpower count" from the original review incrementing*
- POWERHOUSE EXCITEMENT!!!
"Now listen up, y'all - if yer yellin' 'YEE-HAW' at the sound of the bourgeoisie getting kicked in the pants, you just might be...the urban proletariat."
- "In the weather today, a cold front is moving in through the north and generally making things unpleasant. In other news, celebrities embarrass themselves by their utter incompetence when it comes to their sex lives and, somehow, gossip about rich people qualifies as news you need to be concerned with. In the world of sports…" * thud*
- "Bees, my God." "NO, NOT THE BEES! NOT THE BEES! AAAAAAH!
- His mourning version of convoy.
- After seeing a giant hologram of the Jackal's head: "I'm busy finding 5 teenagers with attitude!"
- A Jeff Foxworthy-style redneck one-liner in response to the redneck communists of Sinnamon.