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    St. Lobaf's — Residents 

Karkat Vantas

Institutionalized due to severe anxiety, depression, and anger management issues that drove him into fistfighting a cinderblock wall. (Spoilers: the wall won.)
  • Adaptational Gender Identity: He's a trans man in this version.
  • Covert Pervert: During the sick day arc, Karkat briefly envisions Rose and Kanaya rubbing Vicks all over each other and gets flustered.
  • Freudian Excuse: Probably only rivaled by Rose's. A good deal of Karkat's identity and temperament issues can be traced back to his emotionally abusive relationship with his mother (for starters, it's hinted that he smothers all emotions save incandescent rage because otherwise his feelings would be used as proof that he's "something [he's] not"). Eventually his mother seems to make efforts towards getting her own temper under control, which only mires Karkat deeper in self-loathing for not being able to improve himself accordingly.
  • Hair Color Dissonance: His official hair color is black, but it's usually rendered as red for symbolic reasons.
  • Hair-Trigger Temper: As in canon, but unlike in canon it's treated a genuine disorder. He's so mired in free-floating aggression and self-hate that he can't function, directing his rage either outward (and getting into fights he can't win) or inward (where it tears him up and flattens his self-esteem).
  • Hates Being Touched: As Gamzee discovered, to the dismay of both. One story demonstrates that Karkat doesn't much like seeing others touched against their will, either.
  • Headphones Equal Isolation: Or so he hopes.
  • Jerk with a Heart of Gold: He may be blunt, tactless, abrasive, vocally opposed to social interaction and have a nitro-glycerine temper, but beneath all the yelling he's a deeply compassionate guy, tuned in with the emotional states of people he cares for, wanting to see them happy, and tragically convinced his presence just gets in the way.
  • Messy Hair: Because he's constantly pulling at it.
  • The Napoleon: His height is one of (many) Berserk Buttons for him, not helped by the fact that he's often hunched over.
  • Self-Harm: Some of his self-destructive habits, such as the time he got into a fist fight with a cinderblock wall (he lost), fall into this territory, especially whenever they're used as an outlet for his anger.
  • Sour Outside, Sad Inside: He puts up an abrasive front, but it's mostly to cover up his self-loathing.
    Reader: Karkat, is there anyone at all at the facility that you don't mind being around? Perhaps there is someone you'd even call a friend?
    Karkat: WHO’D BE STUPID ENOUGH TO HANG AROUND ME? THE JUGGALO FUCK DOESN’T COUNT, SINCE HE WAS PROBABLY HIGH WHEN HE HUGGED ME. ALSO THE WHOLE BUSTED NOSE THING. EGBERT DOESN’T COUNT BECAUSE HE’S AN ABRASIVE WALKING SMILEY FACE FRIENDSLUT WHO WANTS TO BE BEST BUDS WITH THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE REGARDLESS OF WHETHER THEY LIKE HIM OR NOT.
  • Trans Tribulations: It's implied that his family wasn't exactly accepting of the fact that he's trans.

Sollux Captor

Bipolar genius, admitted after a particularly dark downswing in his moods led to a drug overdose. He's the current custodian of the FUSB, and the only one who seems to like it.

John Egbert

A prank-obsessed young man of unclear diagnosis. The prevalent theory is that he's schizophrenic or schizotypal. Relentlessly cheerful, he was the first guy to pry Karkat out of his room.
  • Big Brother Instinct: Towards his baby sister, Casey. He comments that he'd be very upset if someone spoke of Casey the way Vriska spoke of Calliope.
  • Cloudcuckoolander: There was an incident involving "alien invasion day" and Unidentified Flying Pancakes in the cafeteria. Also deconstructed; it's implied that his Cloudcuckoolander status is more serious than it sounds, if not a major part of his problem.
  • Cuddle Bug: He'll hug anyone. Even Karkat. Which probably isn't a good idea.
  • A God Am I: A harmless but unusual example; he thinks that he won Sburb and became the Heir of Breath and that everyone else was there and had their own godlike powers too (he's seen telling an uninterested Vriska about her role in Sburb and in a non-canon reader contribution he asks Jane why she can't remember). Nobody believes him, though.
  • The Hyena: Described as having "a contagious giggle".
  • Keet: He's very perky.
  • Manchild: Read almost all of these tropes associated with him and then remember that he's 18 years old.
  • Morality Pet: To Vriska, like in canon. He's pretty much the only person she's consistently nice to.
  • No Sense of Personal Space: As pointed out by Karkat early on, he can't seem to grasp the idea that he does not have an open invitation to hug everyone, and some people are really not OK with being hugged.
  • Past-Life Memories: How he sees his "delusions", as memories from the canon universe that he was reborn with but others weren't.
  • The Pollyanna: The most optimistic resident.
  • Wrong Genre Savvy: Apparently, his main delusion is that he believes to be in a video game. He's not, he's in reality.

Kanaya Maryam

A fashion designer and fanfiction writer, Kanaya self-admitted herself to St. Lobaf's after her anxiety and obsessive-compulsive disorder became unmanageable.
  • Big Beautiful Woman: She's a plus size woman but very fashionable, and this is often commented on in-universe.
  • Death Glare: Possesses one potent enough to stop Dave mid-ramble.
  • The Fashionista: She's a seamstress and designer as well as a fashion enthusiast.
  • Green Thumb: She worked in a greenhouse and loved it.
  • Hopeless with Tech: Mild example. She is "Not Good With Computers."
  • Lipstick Lesbian: She's a very deeply feminine lesbian.
  • Nice Girl: One of the friendlier residents.
  • The Perfectionist: Played for drama — Kanaya's perfectionism is the whole reason she's in St. Lobaf's to begin with, as her obsessive-compulsive disorder and anxiety ended up getting so bad that she could barely even leave her home.
  • Suspiciously Specific Denial: She had nothing to do with the creation of the FUSB.
  • Yaoi Fangirl: Upon being asked by an anon to analyse a dream involving lots of men having sex, her and Rose's first reaction was to ask for more details.

Jade Harley

Jade does not suffer from any particular mental illness, but was admitted to St. Lobaf's because she spent most of her life in a bunker built by her Crazy Survivalist grandfather and, as such, has some issues with reintegrating into society.
  • Badass Adorable: She's an excellent shot.
  • Big Friendly Dog: Bec, naturally (sans reality-warping powers—he's just an enormous fluffy white dog in this universe). He's not allowed in the institute, so she visits him.
  • Crazy-Prepared: Due to having been raised by a survivalist, she's prepared for just about anything life throws at her.
  • Genki Girl: An energetic, amiable girl.
  • The Heart: Everyone openly admits to liking Jade, including Karkat. Even Vriska nearly punched Eridan's face in when he accidentally upset her.
  • Heroes Love Dogs: She still has Bec, who is a normal, non-reality-warping dog in this universe but just as loving. When a reader offered to bring their own dog to give cuddles, well...see Squee below.
  • Nice Guy: And how. Even Karkat and Vriska like her!
  • Only Sane Man: She's not mentally ill, she just had a very unconventional upbringing and needs to be properly socialized.
  • Sacrificed Basic Skill for Awesome Training: Awesome survivalist, excellent shot. Basic social necessities not so much.
  • Skinny Dipping: YAHOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! She is unaware cannon-balling into a stream minus clothes tends to surprise others somewhat. And may be illegal in Minnesota.
  • Squee: She gives a very long squeel delight when someone suggests bringing their dog over.
    Reader: Jade, I know that this isn't much of a replacement [for Bec], but I have a Great Pyrenees that loves to give cuddles. Could I bring her by?
    Jade: eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Gamzee Makara

A long-term residents who self-admitted himself due to extreme depersonalization and perception issues. He has been reprimanded for smuggling or attempting to smuggle certain contraband substances into the institute.
  • Adaptational Heroism: In this universe, Gamzee never goes crazy and doesn't kill anyone.
  • Beware the Nice Ones: Generally extremely affable. But when he returned Karkat's opening punch, he knocked the kid flat and left a black eye that didn't fade for two weeks. Something prompted learning to hit like that.
  • Book Dumb: When he was in school, he got mostly C's and D's due to spacing out in class.
  • Cluster F-Bomb: In a completely non-hostile way. It's more like a Verbal Tic than anything else. Equius does not approve, however.
  • Cuddle Bug: Which causes some trouble with Karkat.
  • Gentle Giant: Described as such at one point. He's incredibly tall but about as malicious as a fluffy pillow.
  • Harmful to Minors: When he was a kid he witnessed his father attack his mother after he found out she was seeing someone elsenote , and it's implied he repressed this memory.
  • Innocently Insensitive: Once in a while. He's a total sweetheart, but doesn't always think before he acts or talks. This mostly comes out in his dealings with Karkat and Sollux, both of whom have more than their fair share of Berserk Buttons that he has an unfortunate habit of unintentionally hitting.
  • Intergenerational Friendship: With Calliope.
  • It Runs in the Family: The story told from the point of view of his father, Ches, implies that some of Gamzee's issues are hereditary.
  • No Sense of Personal Space: He decided to hug Karkat because he thought that Karkat needed a hug. Unfortunately for both of them, Karkat does not like being touched, and Gamzee didn't bother to ask first, so Karkat punched him. It really didn't end well.
  • O.O.C. Is Serious Business: Played for Laughs when he substitutes his usual casual F-bombs for "motherlovin'" and "mondayfriday" in front of Calliope. Sollux is very shocked by this.
  • Stepford Smiler: Gamzee's spacey teddy-bear persona sometimes hangs on by a thread. He once had a particularly bad morning and spent most of the day in the Troubled Fetal Position, weeping his eyes out.
  • The Stoner: Albeit, currently cut off due to St. Lobaf regulations. Unlike in canon, this hasn't caused him to lose his normal good nature.
  • Supreme Chef: Provided he can be prevented from adding certain prohibited substances...although apparently, he can cook pretty spectacular things that include them as ingredients. He's just not allowed.
  • Sweet Tooth: The man loves cake. And Faygo.
  • Wholesome Crossdresser: In his mermaid Halloween costume. He mentions that he enjoys modeling for Kanaya, which suggests that he doesn't pay much attention to gender conventions when he gets a chance to dress up. According to Kanaya, he "Has Excellent Taste in Womens Clothes And Terrible Taste In Mens".

Vriska Serket

A juvenile delinquent who lost her arm and eye in a motorcycle accident, Vriska had a claustrophobic attack while getting arrested and, after being assessed, was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder and sent to St Lobaf. She has since earned the loathing of the staff, and enjoys wearing pirate outfits and antagonizing people.
  • Abusive Parents: It's heavily implied that her father was this, to the point that Vriska feared him, while her mother enabled his behavior.
  • An Arm and a Leg: Like her canonical self, she's missing an eye and arm, which she lost in a motorcycle accident. But Equius isn't a Gadgeteer Genius in this universe, so no robot prosthetics for her.
  • Attention Whore: Part of her HPD. She "feels empty when no one's looking".
  • Celeb Crush: On Nicolas Cage, like her troll counterpart. After John shows her Con Air, she could be heard singing "How Do I Live Without You" in the shower.
  • Dark and Troubled Past: Bullied mercilessly in school and growing up with Abusive Parents, it's not hard to see where her abrasiveness comes from.
  • Disability as an Excuse for Jerkassery
  • Everyone Has Standards: Despite being a Lovable Sex Maniac, she maintains that she has never raped anyone, because "Wh8re’s the fun if they aren’t ripping your pants off with their teeth?"
  • Evil Stole My Faith: She grew up heavily religious because her mother was, and prayed to God for years to help her or at least make her life less terrible. When he never did, she gave up on Him.
  • False Rape Accusation: She accused an ex-boyfriend of raping her because he dumped her.
  • The Friend Nobody Likes: Her abrasive personality has led more than a few people to avoid her like the plague, though they do genuinely want her to get better.
  • From Nobody to Nightmare: According to a side story. She used to be a sweet girl with No Social Skills who suffered from bullying by her classmates and abuse by her parents. Then she reinvented herself one summer and everything went to hell.
  • The Hyena: Described as such in her character profile.
  • I Just Want to Be You: Revealed in her backstory, virtually everything about her current persona was copied from her Aunt Mindfang. As such, she doesn't actually have much of a sense of self.
  • Jerkass Woobie: Her abrasive personality quickly alienates the others, but is shown to be driven by profound unhappiness, self-loathing and no real understanding of how to interact with people normally.
  • Kick the Dog: Many, many, many times. For just one example, her idea of an April Fool's prank was telling Nepeta that Grumpy Cat got hit by a car.
  • Never My Fault: A lot, just like in canon. A notable example is when she mocks Calliope for having severe burns on her face, prompting John, Dave and even Karkat to get angry at her. Her response? It can easily be summed up as "It's just a joke! Jeez, would you lighten up?" Another unfortunate conviction of hers is that when she does bad things, gets reprimanded, and apologises, the situation is then immediately fine again — the injured party has no reason to feel any animosity or wariness toward her and if they do, they're just being unfair. After all, she said sorry! It's her biggest problem as a patient: she refuses to admit that she has a problem, and won't try helping herself. Then she turns around and gets upset that people are 'giving up on her'.
  • Pet the Dog: Most of her interactions with John. She melts pretty quickly when she meets Calliope in person.
  • Pirate Girl: She has a pirate costume and she wears it pretty much whenever she feels like it. Also she's missing an eye (and an arm) so she has a legitimate reason to wear an eyepatch.
  • Psycho Ex-Girlfriend: Woe betide the man who dumps her.
  • Shrinking Violet: In her backstory, her original persona. Her present self is someone else entirely.

Dave Strider

Dave came to St. Lobaf after being taken by protective services after his Bro was arrested on unrelated charges and, incidentally, found to be an unfit parent. He's deeply in denial about this and one of the more uncooperative residents, not speaking for months after being admitted.
  • Abusive Parents: His brother, to put it mildly, is not fit to be a parent. A lot of Dave's problems stem from his refusal to admit this.
  • The Baby of the Bunch: The youngest resident, at 14 years old.
  • Celibate Hero: He's willing to talk (and joke) about sex and related issues in the abstract, but has yet to show any physical or romantic interest in any of the other characters, and he does not find the idea of having sex with anyone at all appealing.
  • Elective Mute: Goes "on strike" whenever he's under extreme stress and refuses to speak or interact with anyone, except occasionally Terezi and Nepeta.
  • Foregone Conclusion: Bro loses the hearing. Everyone knew it was coming except for Dave, who refused to consider the possibility.
  • Hidden Depths: He's also far more observant than some people realize. For instance, he already knows that Karkat is trans but doesn't feel it's worth commenting on, and Word of God is that they specifically placed them together because they knew he wouldn't care. He can also be very astute at times. For example, after Rose tries to talk some sense into Vriska and fails, he tells Rose that while she was right, nobody likes being emotionally blackmailed into something, even if it's for their own good. After Rose admits that she was taking her anger out on Vriska for being so catty when she just wanted to help, Dave tells Rose that she thinks she has to know everything and fix everything to be worth anything. Rose is shocked and amazed, but admits that he's right.
  • Missing Time: Something he frequently experiences. On one occasion he accidentally cut his hand open while home alone and then lost time, meaning he could have bled to death and not known it.
  • Self-Harm: Puts cigarettes out on his arm. Usually doesn't seem completely aware he's doing it.
  • Stepford Snarker: He makes snarky comments at others, but there's a lot of pain behind it.
  • The Stoic: Verging on an Empty Shell after the custody hearing.
  • Sunglasses at Night: Justified, since he has very bad vision due to his albinism and is trying to hide his nystagmus.
  • Trash of the Titans: Dave's half of the bedroom is a complete mess, which Karkat does not appreciate. His habit of storing food in random places does not help.
    Karkat: HOW HARD IS IT TO MAKE A FUCKING BED, ASSHOLE? AND WHILE WE’RE AT IT, NO ONE WANTS TO SEE YOUR UNDERWEAR HANGING OVER THE EDGE OF THE FUCKING DRESSER! WERE YOU RAISED BY A PACK OF WILD DOGS OR SOMETHING?
  • Troubling Unchildlike Behaviour: He puts cigarettes out on his arm, for one thing.

Nepeta Leijon

Autistic and suffering from acute sensory processing disorder, Nepeta was admitted when she found she couldn't reliably handle her sensory issues. Other than that, she's one of the clinic's more functional residents.
  • Better with Non-Human Company: She's friendly and kind-hearted, but she has trouble fitting in among "normal" people and keeping up with social trends. She also likes animals.
  • Brown Note: Because of her sensory processing issues, she can have very strong negative reactions to mundane stimuli. She has a particular loathing for purple. Whatever perfume Kanaya was wearing that day also gave her serious problems.
  • Cat Girl: With her outfit and persona. Biologically, she's completely human.
  • Cosplay Otaku Girl: One of her hobbies away from Lobaf's. Then there's her usual choice of accessories.
  • Does Not Like Spam: She hates pancakes.
  • Expressive Shirt: Her hat occasionally mimics her moods.
  • Genki Girl: By Karkat's memorable description, "a permanently-erupting volcano of giggles".
  • Hidden Depths: She may be silly, but she's a lot more perceptive than she seems and notices a lot about the other residents.
  • Intergenerational Friendship: She's a college-age just-adult and becomes good friends with Equius, who is markedly older.
  • Kindhearted Cat Lover: She LOVES cats. Her pet cat is staying at her parents' house while she lives at St. Lobaf's.
  • Nice Girl: She's rather eccentric, but extremely nice. She's also one of the few people Dave will willingly talk to when he's "on strike" besides Terezi specifically because she's so nice.
  • Noodle Incident: Played for Drama with what put her in St. Lobaf's in the first place. All we hear is that she had an emotional meltdown, which has never been described in detail, nor has said incident ever visited in Brainbent canon. Played for Laughs when someone asks how she got in and she goes into a tangent about how she "jacked a police cruiser" and goes on to describe a crime she (allegedly) committed. She was probably just joking (or roleplaying) though.
  • The Nose Knows: She has a strong sense of smell. How strong? She can detect the scent of campfire smoke on Jade's clothes after they went through the laundry. Twice.
    Jade: i washed my entire wardrobe twice! you have a schnozz on you like a freakin' bloodhound!
    Nepeta: :33 < yeah it makes it really easy to stalk my purrrey
  • Playful Cat Smile: She has a slight cleft lip in some of the art that gives this effect. Unsurprising, given her status as a perky Cat Girl.
  • Shipper on Deck: Apparently in this universe, this stems from the suggestion that she look at the relationships of others in order to help herself learn more social skills. She took to it a little too well...

Rose Lalonde

An amateur psychologist, Rose correctly diagnosed herself with alcoholism and mother issues and self-admitted to St. Lobaf's as a result.
  • The Alcoholic: Like her mother, one of her major issues before she came to St. Lobaf was alcoholism.
  • Brass Balls: As pointed out by several readers, it took some serious courage for her to admit that she has a problem, walk away from her privileged life and get help.
  • Broken Ace: She was at least on the verge of becoming one — rich, intelligent, and accomplished, but full of hidden insecurities, parental ambivalence, and substance abuse issues. Unusually for the trope, she caught on to what was happening and decided to get help. Dave also points out that Rose feels like she has to be an Ace to have any worth at all. Rose concedes the point.
  • Broken Bird
  • Freudian Excuse: Her mother never physically abused her, but what she did do was endlessly criticise young Rose, thus destroying her self-esteem.
  • The Mad Hatter: Going to St. Lobaf's was her idea — she recognized she had problems.
  • Only Sane Man: Often. She's even this from her canon character by being more honest with herself and trying to help others with their own issues.
  • Sesquipedalian Loquaciousness: She uses a lot of big, fancy words.
  • The Smart Girl: To the point that she's already been researching psychology, which is likely how she figured out her own issues.
  • Yaoi Fangirl: When an anon asks her and Kanaya for advice on a really homoerotic dream he had, both Rose and Kanaya immediately demand more details in a way that makes it clear they're not merely interested in giving him advice.

Eridan Ampora

Admitted after plans for a school shooting were found in his locker, Eridan's specific diagnosis is left unclear.
  • Abhorrent Admirer: To Feferi. Unlike in canon, he realizes he's got no chance — but a man can dream, right?
  • Abusive Parents: From what we've heard, his father's a massive dick.
  • All of the Other Reindeer: Part of his backstory was how he was heavily bullied.
  • Beware the Quiet Ones: In his backstory, he got fed up with being bullied, and then decided to strike back, so he went to school dressed as his LARP character and broke the jaw of the first guy to give him shit about it. The main reason he got sent to Lobaf is that school officials feared they might have a potential school shooting on their hands.
  • The Dandy: A bit. At least, he is unusually style-conscious for a teenage boy.
  • Drama Queen: Apparently, when a cold epidemic swept through St. Lobaf's, he spent all of his time lying in bed with his hands folded over his chest funeral-style because he was convinced he was going to die. From a cold.
  • Giftedly Bad: As a writer of amateur fantasy fiction. Gamzee seems to like his work, but Gamzee seems to like everything. Eridan does have potential — it takes genuine talent to write prose that purple - but he's in dire need of constructive criticism and the confiscation of his thesaurus.
  • Insistent Terminology: Eridan would like you to know that he owns an actual fedora, as opposed to those 'modern reimaginations a the fuckin trilby'.
  • Likes Older Women: He has a crush on Feferi, who in this universe is in her early thirties.
  • Lonely Rich Kid: His parents are pretty well-off, which fuelled a lot of the bullying he endured in school.
  • No Social Skills: Not in the "Good lord, were you raised by alien robot wolves?" sense, but he's suffering from a bad case of adolescent pretentiousness and he lacks tact.
  • Speech Impediment: He has a stutter.
  • Straw Vegetarian: Atypical dietary habits/needs aren't uncommon at St. Lobaf's (for instance, Nepeta is very particular about the arrangement of her food due to her sensitivity to textures; Equius and WV are entirely pleasant vegetarians; and Gamzee has strong feelings about varieties of dessert). Really, nobody would have a problem with Eridan going vegan... if he didn't walk around trying to cram his moral superiority for doing so down everyone's throats.
  • What Have I Become?: When he punched out the jock who tried to make fun of his LARP costume, he had a moment of this trope when one of his classmates went to the jock's assistance, looked up at Eridan and he realised that she thought he'd attack her as well for helping the jock, even though he didn't have the slightest thing against her. The realisation shocked him so much that he turned around and ran away.
  • Wrong Genre Savvy: He tried to intentionally invoke something he saw in a prison movie — specifically, the idea that if you end up in prison, you should make an example of anyone who tries to fuck with you so everyone else will respect you. Not only did it not work, it actually did the exact opposite of what he wanted: nobody respects him because they're all afraid of him, so instead of becoming admired and respected, he just got alienated even more, to the point that nobody wanted to talk to him, even people who were the closest thing he had to real friends.

    St. Lobaf's — Staff 

Equius Zahhak

The STRONG, humorless security guard and dorm supervisor. He also enjoys knitting.
  • Age Lift: An adult, contrasting with his teenage canon self.
  • The Big Guy: He is STRONG. And has a tendency to break knitting needles.
  • Brass Balls: See Nice Guy, below. It takes a lot of STRENGTH to turn away from your life in the face of everyone else's disapproval.
  • Comically Serious: His strict, serious demeanor clashes humorously with the wacky antics of everyone else around him.
  • Does Not Know His Own Strength: He tries to learn how to knit from Rose, but he keeps breaking the needles. When a reader suggests using metal needles, the problem stops.
  • Gosh Dang It to Heck!: He does not curse and disapproves of cursing in others. Namely Karkat.
  • Huge Guy, Tiny Girl: Platonic version, with Nepeta.
  • Hyper-Awareness: He notes that he's recently become very aware of his surroundings, noticing every little detail and looking for signs that something might be amiss with the people around him.
  • Nice Guy: To the point that he walked out of his old life because he wanted to do something that would actually help people, and he felt guilty because he had so much while others had so little when they were doing so much more than him.
  • Real Men Wear Pink: He recently took up knitting and writes poetry. He also has a Suspiciously Specific Denial about how the terribly clashing colors on Terezi's dress is no business of his.
  • Riches to Rags: Actually invoked it himself: he went from his comfortable existence to being the nurse in a mental institution, and he's just fine with it.
  • Sugar-and-Ice Personality: He's not the most approachable of individuals, between his social awkwardness, overly-serious manner, and sheer size, but he's kind in his way and has a STRONG desire to help people.
  • Team Dad: Rose even tells him that he'd make a good parent in one story.

Tavros Nitram

A former resident now working as an intern.
  • Adaptational Sexuality: In canon, Tavros is assumed to be bisexual like all trolls, and most of his romantic relationships have been with girls (he's very much unhealthy relationship with Vriska and his implied crush on Jade)note . Here, he's gay and is dating a man.
  • Age Lift: Was thirteen in canon, is in his early twenties here.
  • Badass Adorable: Doesn't often get a chance to show it, but he's had his moments.
    People who really know him will also talk about the time he went jousting at the local renfest and unhorsed every re-enactor that dared come up against him. And then broke his nose on the dismount. There are photos on the internet of Tavros Nitram smiling and throwing the horns, grinning through a curtain of crimson from both nostrils and both eyes already swelling up, surrounded by astonished and horrified people in corsets.
  • Dark and Troubled Past: He's doing quite well now, but in the past he's faced homophobia, bullying, depression, a permanent spinal cord injury, and a (failed, obviously) suicide attempt.
  • Friend to All Children: He's specializing in child and adolescent psychology, and his character introduction mentions that he gets along well with younger people, although they tend to think he's kind of a dork (probably because he is a dork).
  • Insistent Terminology: He's not a victim, he's a survivor.
  • Nice Guy: He's the kindest member of the staff.
  • Straight Gay: He isn't camp at all. That said, he's also kind of bland.
  • Wide-Eyed Idealist: He's had a hard life, but his cheer shows regardless.
  • Youthful Freckles: The youngest member of the staff whose face is covered in freckles.

Dr. Terezi Pyrope

Head of Staff — the youngest to hold that title, in fact — and a skilled psychiatrist. The patients call her "Doctor Tongue".
  • Age Lift: Terezi was one of the comic's Kid Heroes in canon, but here, she's an adult.
  • Asian and Nerdy: A mild example, and it's stated she played Dungeons & Dragons in high school.
  • Bunny-Ears Lawyer: She's the same cackling weirdo she was in the source material and once spontaneously ran off the grounds to locate and institutionalize Stephenie Meyer, but is still a mature and effective therapist.
  • Cool Shades: As with all iterations of Terezi, she wears some cool-looking pointy red sunglasses.
  • In-Series Nickname: "Doctor Tongue". She was also called "Tiny Asian Doogie Houser" by her college buddies.
  • Improbable Age: 34, which isn't too far fetched for a psychologist, but being chief of staff for an entire institution is (which is lampshaded).
  • Intergenerational Friendship: She bonds closely with Dave during his brother's hearing.
  • Noodle Incident: The incident that spawned her aforementioned "Doctor Tongue" nickname. She thinks the rumors are hilarious.
  • Rummage Sale Reject: There are several references to her wearing colors that clash badly or outfits that just don't go together, but people cut her some slack due to her blindness. It's also implied that she may be doing this intentionally. According to Equius:
    Her dress is awful, teal and vivid red, and you suppose she chose it for the loudness of the colors. You have no idea where a woman might buy something so terrible. Surely no company would deliberately create such a dress, not that it is any business of yours.

Feferi Peixes

The overseer of the female ward and dormitories, which she runs with cheer and an iron fist. A great enjoyer of everything fish-related, she installed a duck pond on grounds before getting permission for a duck pond.
  • Age Lift: She's a teenager in canon, but in her thirties here.
  • Animal Motifs: Fish, of course. Her father was a crab fisherman and Deadliest Catch is her favourite show.
  • The Dreaded: She's a sweet lady, but she has a scary side that strikes fear in the rest of the staff and some of the residents.
  • Nice Guy: She's a kind soul. Just don't piss her off.
  • Silk Hiding Steel: She's described as a "cheerful little drill sergeant."
    Reader: Even snuck in to be with the ladies? (Anyone can answer)
    Feferi: NOT ON MY WATC)( TH——EY DON’T!
  • Team Mom: The friendly maternal presence among the staff, whilst also being a Mama Bear to anyone who messes with her charges.

Penelope Messenger (PM)

Head Nurse, Penelope mans the front desk and hands out mail to residents. She also collects stamps.
  • Plucky Girl: Most likely, although she hasn't made enough appearances to know much about her personality. Her intro mentions that she "rules the front desk with an iron fist" and is capable of taking on Feferi.

William Valentine (WV)

A war veteran working on the hospital staff.

    Others 

Aradia Megido

Sollux's closest friend, who regularly visits to talk with him.
  • Happily Adopted: By Droog, the Midnight Crew's saxophonist, who is her stepfather and who she seems close with.
  • Nightmare Fetishist: Like in canon, other people are a little weirded out by her fascination with death, since while not playing with the Crew, Droog runs a funeral home and she helps out.
  • Platonic Life-Partners: With Sollux. They used to date, but broke up and kept things platonic from that point on, and Aradia is noted to be Sollux's most important friend for much of the story.

Fucking Ugly Stuffed Bee (FUSB)

A plush bee in many clashing colors, created as a somewhat misguided attempt to serve as a source of cheer.
  • Companion Cube: Was created to be a comfort item for the residents. Sollux is the one who uses it most often.
  • Punny Name: Tavros intended to call it "Beeatrice."
  • Series Mascot: To the point where it shows up in other fanfics that aren't set in the Brainbent universe.
  • Ugly Cute: invoked Tavros was trying for "comforting" and wound up with "nightmarish", though still kind of adorable.

Pollux "Pol" Captor and Clubs Deuce

Sollux's fathers.

Mr. Egbert

John's dad.

Casey Egbert

John's beloved younger sister.

"Bro" Strider

Dave's much-older brother, who raised him after their parents died. For all that Dave adores him, Bro was fantastically unfit to be a parent and his mismanagement of their lives and house led to many of Dave's current issues.
  • Children Raise You: Serious aversion. Raising his much-younger brother hasn't taught Bro how to be a responsible adult, and the results aren't pretty.
  • Everyone Has Standards: While he was an absolutely terrible guardian to Dave, he never, ever forced him to participate in his porn videos and was horrified at the thought of doing so.
  • Freudian Excuse: His and Dave's own parents were alcoholic, abusive drug addicts who died when Bro was nineteen and Dave was just two months old. No one helped him or attempted to intervene, leading him and Dave to where they are today.
  • Hidden Depths: While he's built up as a reprehensible toolbox for most of the AU, it's hinted here and there that he feels guilty over what the separation is putting Dave through, and does recognize on some level that he's an unfit parent.
  • Lethal Chef: His meals are inedible slop cobbled together from whatever's lying around, which is why Dave got into the habit of stashing food wherever he went.
  • Manchild: Deconstructed. Bro's a single parent in his early thirties with the apparent maturity, responsibility, and domestic aptitude of a teenager, and this affects Dave badly.
  • Never My Fault: He's not very good at owning up to what he's put Dave through. In a similar vein to Vriska, he seems to be of the "apologies make everything better!" mindset and gets defensive when people don't accept it. Dave rightfully calls him out on this.
    Dave: No, don't suddenly be like you're the one giving me advice. Don't turn it around like you actually know how shit needs to go with me. I didn't come here to be all flowers and entrees letting bygones be fucking bygones. Is that honestly what you thought this was for? We'd just have our reunion here, hug it all out and everybody'd apologize and turn the page because we're all each other's got? Man, fuck you. I hate you.
  • Not as You Know Them: Word of God is that in this AU, Bro and Dirk are two different characters. There is a level of Early-Installment Weirdness at play here, since this version of Bro was created before Dirk was introduced and based on an interpretation of Bro that has little in common with Dirk.
  • Parental Neglect: Leaves Dave home alone for hours or even days at a stretch, convinced that the kid can take care of himself. Dave has often gone without food and accidentally injured himself and had nobody to care for him.
  • Promoted to Parent: Bro had to raise his baby brother after their parents died. He didn't do a very good job.
  • Really Gets Around: Makes his living through homemade porn, both puppet-related and traditional. And that's not counting his lengthy series of girlfriends, most of whom don't stay longer than a week.

Rona Lalonde

Rose's mother.
  • Abusive Parents: Actually subverted, according to Word of God. Mrs. Lalonde is well-intentioned, but wasn't prepared for a daughter and doesn't know how to raise her. As with the source material, a lot of her abuse and neglect is actually due to Rose's warped perception of her mother and Rona's exasperation with their passive-aggressive spats.
  • The Alcoholic: Like in canon, Rose's mother is a bit of a lush who drowns her sorrows in alcohol.

Becquerel

Mindfang

Vriska's aunt.
  • Cool Aunt: Vriska certainly thinks so. She could also be seen as a deconstruction; Vriska thought she was cool and sought to be like her, which led to Vriska suffering from most of the problems she has now.
  • Social Darwinist: She taught Vriska that "weak people dig their own graves".
  • Who Names Their Kid "Dude"?: Subverted; she legally changed her name.

Vriska's Parents

  • Abusive Parents: Both were physically abusive towards Vriska in her childhood, though Vriska's father was much worse. The results were ugly.
  • Extreme Doormat: Vriska's mother has no ability to stand up against her husband's abuse and made no attempt to protect her daughter from it either.
  • Mood-Swinger: As a child, Vriska remembers happily baking cookies with her mother, who switched from cheerful to furious in an instant when Vriska ate too much and threw up on her dress, punishing her with a violent beating.

Dante

Calliope

An little girl with severe burns on her face that she hides with a decorative mask.
  • Age Lift: She's the same age as everyone else in canon. Here, she's a little girl.
  • Harmful to Minors: We don't know what happened to her, but given that she's a small child, has a lot of scars and she's getting psychiatric help, she probably ran into this trope.
  • Imaginary Enemy: This update implies that the Felt/Leprechauns are this for her.
    TC: WhOoOoOa. :oO
    TC: AnD yOu'rE sAyIn ThEsE jOkErS aRe AlL wAtChInG yOu AnD sTufF?
    TC: DaNg, BrIgHtEyEs, ThAt'S bEiNg StRaIgHt Up CrEePy.
    UU: ^u^
  • Intergenerational Friendship: With Gamzee and presumably WV as well.
  • In-Universe Nickname: Gamzee calls her "Bright Eyes", for good reason. Vriska calls her the less nice "Kruger8a8y".
  • Masking the Deformity: Calliope is a young girl who covers the bottom of her face with a decorated cloth mask (the kind that would become popular years later) to hide burn scars.
  • Nightmare Fuel Coloring Book: Her sketchbook slips into this occasionally (the aforementioned leprechauns and Caliborn pictures, for example). Possibly justified as drawing might be part of her therapy.
  • The Silent Bob: She hasn't spoken in canon. Her only line that doesn't consist of a single ellipsis is a smile (^u^).
    • When asked a question directly, she was perfectly willing to answer it... via written-out sign.
    • Possibly justified by her injuries, which are on her mouth. Either she can't talk, or her mask renders her unintelligible.
  • Two-Faced: Rare cute sympathetic female example. She has burn scars on the lower half of her face, which she normally covers with a decorated surgical mask.
  • What Beautiful Eyes!: She has big, expressive, round green eyes, and since her mouth is always covered by a mask, they're her most prominent facial feature. Gamzee's go-to nickname for her is "Bright Eyes" for this reason.
  • The Woobie: She's been through a disfiguring serious injury and she's currently getting psychiatric help. It's safe to say she hasn't had the easiest time of it lately.

Caliborn

  • Big Brother Bully: He's been referenced twice on the blog (first when Gamzee mentions a picture of him in Calliope's sketchbook and second when an ACTUAL picture of him she drew is seen). While he hasn't made an actual appearance, what little has been seen and heard of him implies that Calliope's afraid of him.
  • The Ghost: So far has only been mentioned and appeared as a rather scary looking drawing in Calliope's sketchbook that she crossed out for unknown reasons.
  • Scary Black Man: Calliope clearly seems to think so, and if he's anything like his canon counterpart, he most likely is one...


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