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Quotes / What Do You Mean, It's Not for Kids?

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"Bless the seventies and eighties. 'Our movie is PG! Bring the kids, we got titties and everything!'"

"What, do you people really think I'm intended for children? Like, the littlest tiniest babies? I don't think I'm cut out for that sort of sugarjob."
Strong Bad, Strong Bad Email "for kids"

If for children you mistook
The rhymes and poems in this book,
We must at once apologize
And open up your blinkered eyes.
Please do not feel sad or lonely
When we warn: FOR ADULTS ONLY!
Now We Are Sick

"A really cute thing that shouldn't have been cute."
— How one of the teenagers on "Teens React" described Dumb Ways to Die

"Suicide, interpersonal strife, and curses from beyond the grave: what more could one want from a cute little talking animal comic?"

Iron Man: But between the two of us, my movie is more family friendly.
Batman: How is mine not family friendly?
Iron Man: Right... "Sorry, kids. I couldn't get in to see Kung Fu Panda. Let's go watch the clown with the M-16 opening fire on a school bus!"

Storyteller: "Rumpletweezer ran the dinky-tinky shop in the foot of the magic oak tree by the wobbly dum-dum bush in the shade of the magic glade down in Dingly Dell. Here he sold contraceptives and..."
[Shocked, he begins flipping through the book]
Storyteller: "Discipline"... "naked"... "with a melon"??"

Customer: But it's about superheroes! How can a film about superheroes be unsuitable for kids?
Me: There is a scene where one of the heroes cuts a man's head in half with a meat cleaver.
I'm 12 years old and what is this?
A YouTube user (after viewing porn disguised as a Jonas Brothers music video)

"The filmmakers seem confused about who they were making the film for. They surely must have known the approach taken could only result in howls of outrage from the series’ fans. Thus with fans of the originals alienated, the only audience that leaves for Land of the Lost is either fans of Will Ferrell or those of lowbrow farce. Even then the film’s trailer gave no indication that the film was anything other than a straightforward lost world adventure. The fact that the film was intended as a comedy had been entirely omitted in any of the promotion. While the audience for both the original tv series was clearly children, here the two children have been recast as adults and the humour is decidedly grown-up – gags about Cha-Ka constantly grabbing Anna Friel’s breasts, Will Ferrell accusing Danny McBride of playing with himself, not to mention a scene where the three men sit around in a pool and get stoned. All of this was enough for Land of the Lost to receive a PG-13 rating in the US. Despite this, the publicity machine was clearly trying to pitch the film to family audiences. In terms of its promotion, we have what is possibly one of the most confused films of the year."
Richard Scheib, on the 2009 film adaptation of Land of the Lost.

If a rating on the box has ever been an adequate representation of a game's themes, plot and gameplay this is it.
CGR Underthrow, explaining in his review of Killer7 that the titular game is not meant for kidsnote 

Jimmy Kimmel: This is not a movie for kids to go see.
Seth Rogen: If you're a terrible parent, then I think it might be.
Jimmy Kimmel discussing Sausage Party with Seth Rogen

I just won a new award for a kids' show
Talking 'bout a face numbing off a bag of blow
I'm like goddamn bitch, I am not a Teen Choice
Goddamn bitch, I am not a bleach boy
The Weeknd, "Reminder"

Don't let your kids watch it!
Robbie Rotten in the third season trailer of LazyTown, edited onto stuff that looks like it's for kids, but isn't.

"Good kids, stay away from this show. Got it?"

"Why are you watching Adult Swim?"
An audience member at a Comic-Con panel, after a kid declared Rick and Morty to be [adult swim]'s best show

I know neither the show nor the movie was intended for kids — but that didn't stop us from watching it anyway!

My little brother open this video and watch by himself. Told him not every cat videos is good for kids but he didn't listen

"Mummy, can I watch this funny internet video about my favorite Yoshi game?"
"Of course, darling. There's hardly likely to be a reference to the dude that fucked the monkey that gave us AIDS."

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