"Fools...you dare to challenge me? Attempt to defeat me? Try to destroy me? I who saved you from certain death? After all I've done for you, you betray me?! And why?! (tears open the building he's climbing to show them the civilians) For them? The ones who hated you, have forsaken you? Can't you see? None of them will ever understand you the way I can. For we are kindred spirits whose powers spring from the same source. So girls, do not make me destroy you! For we are smarter! We are stronger! We are invincible! We have the power! We are superior to them! And we shall rule! All we have to do is work together. Girls, join me"
Richard Nixon: That's our tragedy, you and I, Mr. Frost. No matter how high we get, they still look down at us.
David Frost: I really don't know what you're talking about.
Richard Nixon: Yes you do. Now come on. No matter how many awards or column inches are written about you, or how high the elected office is for me, it's still not enough. We still feel like the little man. The loser. They told us we were a hundred times, the smart asses in college, the high ups. The well-born. The people whose respect we really wanted. Really craved. And isn't that why we work so hard now, why we fight for every inch? Scrambling our way up in undignified fashion. If we're honest for a minute, if we reflect privately, just for a moment, if we allow ourselves a glimpse into that shadowy place we call our soul, isn't that why we're here? Now? The two of us. Looking for a way back into the sun. Into the limelight. Back onto the winner's podium. Because we can feel it slipping away. We were headed, both of us, for the dirt. The place the snobs always told us that we'd end up. Face in the dust, humiliated all the more for having tried. So pitifully hard. Well, to hell with that! We're not going to let that happen, either of us. We're going to show those bums, we're going to make 'em choke on our continued success. Our continued headlines! Our continued awards! And power! And glory! We are gonna make those mother fuckers choke! ...Am I right?
Frost: ...You are. Except only one of us can win.
(Terry as Batman knees Joker in the stomach while holding him in an armlock)
Joker: (groaning) What are you doing?
Batman: Fighting dirty.
Joker: The real Batman would never...(groans as he gets kneed in the stomach again)
Batman: Told ya you didn't know me.
Joker: Funny guy...
Batman: Can't say the same for you.
Joker: (growling) Impudent brat. Who do you think you're talking to?
Batman: Not a comedian, I'll tell you that.
Joker: Shut your mouth!
Batman: The "real" Batman never talked to you much, did he? That's probably why you were so fixated on him.
Joker: Don't play psychoanalyst with me, boy!
Batman: Oh, I don't need a degree to figure you out. (takes out the lights) The real reason you kept coming back was you never got a laugh out of the old man.
Joker: I'm not hearing this!
Batman: Get a clue, clowny! He's got no sense of humour. He wouldn't know a good joke if it bit him in the cape... Not that you ever had a good joke.
Joker: Shut up... Shut up!
Batman: I mean, joy buzzers? Squirting flowers? LAME! Where's the A-material? Make a face, drop your pants, something!
Joker: Show yourself!
Batman: You make me laugh... But only cause I think you're kinda pathetic. (starts laughing)
Joker: Stop that!
Batman: (still laughing) So, you fell in a tank of acid, got your skin bleached and decided to become a supervillain. What, you couldn't get work as a rodeo clown?
Joker: Don't you DARE laugh at me!
Batman: (even still laughing) Why? I thought the Joker always wanted to make Batman laugh!
Joker: (enraged as he starts throwing grenades) YOU'RE NOT BATMAN!!!
Miko Miyazaki: Vile unnatural abomination! You shall never succeed in your evil quests!
Xykon: Meh. As last words go, I've heard better. Time to die, paladin! ... Hey, just a tip: if you want to start begging for mercy, now's probably the time to go for it.
Miko Miyazaki: I shall not give you the satisfaction. I have no fear. The blessing of the Twelve Gods has removed all traces of fear, magical or otherwise, from their paladins. Death does not scare me.
Redcloak: Wow. And you have the cajones to call Xykon, "unnatural abomination"? With a straight face?
Miko Miyazaki: Excuse me?
Redcloak: Think about it. Is there anything more natural than the fear response? "Fight or Flight," it's one of the most basic instincts there is. But thanks to your meddling gods, you've got no fear at all. Which leaves you with, what, "Fight or Fight Some More"? No wonder you're so angry. Maybe that's why you paladins are so full of yourselves. You're immune to the fear that you might be wrong. Immune to the fear of becoming tyrants. You know what else has no fear? Constructs. You're at least as unnatural as Xykon.
Miko Miyazaki: You dare compare me to the undead?
Redcloak: Hey, sure, Xykon might be a skeleton stripped of its dead flesh and forced into an unholy semblance of life by arcane powers too terrible to even consider, but at least he cops to it!
Xykon: Amen, brother! Preach it!
Redcloak: Face it, human. You're every bit as much of an "unnatural abomination" as he is, with the extra added bonus of being a myopic hypocrite. Now if you'll excuse me, this 100% all-natural goblin has an army to lead.
Xykon: Well, damn. I was gonna just kill you, but now I think it might be more evil to let you stew on that for a while.
Miko Miyazaki: Meh. As indignant speeches go, I've heard better.
You still here, elf? Or did you cut and run? Let's play Hide-and-Seek, just to be sure. I'm "It." Actually, so are you, as near as I can tell. You seem to have an interest in power, so let me educate you a little while I search for you. It's sort of this thing I like to do sometimes, especially for learned wizards such as yourself. Power, it isn't something you put on or take off like a jacket. It's something you just ARE. If you can lose it by blowing two Will saves, you never really had any power in the first place, you know what I'm saying? Hell, the idiot paladin understands better than you do, 'cause he got every one of those hit points I burned off of him the hard way: he earned them. 'Course, now he's also earned an upgrade to Prisoners First Class for daring to touch my pretty little bauble. It's sort of the same as how we've already been treating him, only now we get serious about it. Anyhoo, where was I? Oh, right. Your soul shenanigans are real flashy, but they had one weakness: they were still shackled to your lame mid-level ass! I used to think spells equaled power, too, back when I was alive. I've learned a lot since then. You know what does equal power? Power. Power equals power. Crazy, huh? But the type of power? Doesn't matter as much as you'd think. It turns out, everything is oddly balanced. Weird, but true. For example: [Xykon reaches out and grabs Vaarsuvius, who is invisible, and begins strangling hir] ...Right now, power takes the form of a +8 racial bonus to Listen skill checks. So, Uncle Xykon, what's the moral of the story? A big pile of spells isn't enough when the other guy has a big pile of spells AND the strength to crush your windpipe with his bare phlanges. And they died happily ever after. The End.
—Xykon, The Order of the Stick
Annie: "Britta's right; you're the most selfish person alive! And all that is going to end right now, because I'm telling him what kind of friend you really are."
Jeff: "Maybe you should tell him you're hopelessly in love with him. [Annie is stunned] High school must have been tough, huh? Waiting for a superstar to notice you. But here, he's all alone, and he needs so much help! Did you enroll in all of his classes, or were you worried that might freak him out? The important thing is that you are there for him. The important thing is that you are the only one there for him. And you don't really care what he wants, just as long as you don't have to share him with the rest of the world. Because really, you're just as selfish as I am. You're just not as good at it yet."
Annie: [Hurt] "You're right. I could never be as good as you. Probably because I actually care."
Jeff: [Flippantly] "Profound, but technically meaningless. [Upset, Annie storms off] And don't bother trying that thing that women do when they walk away and make the guy feel like crap because it's not going to happen! Yeah! [Guilty] Damn it!"
"Those words of yours, 'I will never let my comrades die...' Now, look around you... and try to say them again! I said, say those words again! As the bodies of your comrades cool in your arms... take in their deaths! This will keep happening, and your flippant words and ideology shall become lies. This is the end result of ideals and hopes. This is reality. Naruto... what is there here for you in this reality?! Both your father and mother are gone... your master, Jiraiya too... and if you keep standing against us, you'll continue to lose your comrades one by one, this shall become a world where no one acknowledges you will exist. The only thing that awaits you is your personal nightmare. Solitude! So why keep living in reality, eh? Now come join us, Naruto!"
"You're really getting worked up over this, aren't you? Don't kid yourself into thinking you can help any of them. You know that they're going to wind up dead no matter what you do. And then what happens? You're left with nothing, that's what. The smart thing to do - the only thing - take whatever's important to you and run as far away as you possibly can. You act like you have a conscience, but you're just being sentimental. Isn't that right, Hohenheim? You think you can change things? You honestly believe that one act of caring will make you human? How could it - look at your own face! Humans are nothing but a resource, and if we don't use them they'll spread like weeds. You can't change reality, only your perception! Tell me what you think you could actually change, the nature of their species? They will always be weak and frightened creatures!"
—Father, Fullmetal Alchemist
Ed: Shut up! Do you really think you'll get away with this?! Messing around with someone's life like that! Your own daughter!!
Tucker: Someone's life? HAHAHAHAHAAA! Fullmetal Alchemist, look at your leg! Your arm! Your brother! Those things are also the result of 'messing around' with somebody's life, aren't they?
Ed: SHUT UP! *WHACK*
Tucker: We are the same! We're the same, you and me!
Ed: WE'RE NOT!
Tucker: Oh, but yes we are! The opportunity was right in front of us and we took it! We had to, even though we knew it was against the rules!
"Do they know you're a fraud, Ted? Have you told them there wasn't any money, and no great home on the Shore drive, no speedboat and no wonderful cabin cruiser that could sleep twelve and a crew of six? Do they know? Have you let them in on your other secrets, Ted? Are they ready to gut you, to torture half as well as I can, just to find out the secrets? Heh heh. Maybe I'll rat you out, sweetheart!"
Tell me this, Doctor Freeman, if you can. You have destroyed so much... what is it, exactly, that you have created? Can you name even one thing? I thought not.
—Dr. Breen, Half-Life 2
Such tears... what beauty they hold, these tears of sorrow. Surely, they are the most precious substance in the world... but, are you worthy to shed such tears? The act of mourning the dead belongs to the realm of humans... The human race, fearful in its weakness, built this world in a futile attempt to elude the abyss they call mortality. Culture, civilization, all delusions created by a powerless race, and of little use, like a barren woman. But amidst all this, you continue to exist as an unfettered soul, free from the shackles of flesh and blood. A completely pure consciousness. An eternal spiral undefiled by impurities. A fusion of fire, breath, and spirit! What can we call you, but angels? New, unadulterated psyches, but what you lack is reality, and that is what I shall provide you with!
—Albedo, Xenosaga, Episode I
Malefor: Such determination to get here. It seems we share other qualities besides our color.
Spyro: Iím nothing like you!
Malefor: Do you think so? HmmÖweíll get to that.
Cynder: Donít listen to him, Spyro. Donít listen to anything he says.
Malefor: You look so weary. Allow me to make you more comfortable (removes their magic tethers). There. Thatís better isnít it? It is the least I could do for you, Cynder. After all, you've done so much for me.
Spyro: You used her!
Malefor: I used her, she used you. What does it matter really?
Spyro: What does he mean?
Malefor: What? He doesn't know? Go on! Tell him! You mustn't leave him in the dark!
Spyro: Tell me what?
Malefor: How she lured you to the Well of Souls... How she tricked you into freeing me.
Cynder: Youíre lying!
Malefor: Hmm... I find it peculiar how youíve chosen to remember things. Let me assure you. It was you who freed me, Spyro. And you who brought me back. And we have Cynder to thank for that (Evil Laugh)
Spyro: Cynder? Is it true?
Malefor: Oh, I think you do. But perhaps you need a little nudge (takes over CynderĎs mind).
Spyro: Cynder! ...Cynder, no!
Malefor: Ignitus should have warned you. You are alone here, young dragon. You have always been alone. Still, here you are, trying so desperately to save this miserable world. Refusing to accept the true role of the purple dragon. Iím sure youíve been told that I was the first of our kindÖbut I assure you, there have been many. It has been the duty of our predecessors to resurrect the Destroyer and Golems of the deep, to bring about the great cleansing! This is the true nature of our kind! Your destiny is to destroy the world!
Spyro: No! I donít believe that!
Malefor: Of Course you donít! But you have fulfilled your destiny nonetheless! In my time, I was stopped... prevented from completing my quest! But you... you have carried the flame! Be it through your own will or not! And soon, the world will be destroyed, you along with it! (Evil Laugh)
— The Legend of Spyro: Dawn of The Dragon
"Looked at sky through smoke heavy with human fat and God was not there. The cold, suffocating dark goes on forever, and we are alone. Live our lives, lacking anything better to do; Devise reason later. Born from Oblivion, bear children, hell-bound as ourselves, go into Oblivion. There is nothing else.
Existence is random; has no pattern save what we imagine after staring at it too long. No meaning save what we choose to impose. This rudderless world is not shaped by vague metaphysical forces. It is not God who kills the children. Not Fate that butchers them or Destiny that feeds them to the dogs. It's us. Only us.
Does that answer your question, doctor?"
— Rorschach, Watchmen
Judge Hope: I know you've got me down as this creature... but you know, hey; I get where you're coming from. And I like your stuff-
Bing: It's not stuff, it's-
Judge Hope: Truth. Am I right? Your truth, admittedly, but truth nonetheless. And you're right; authenticity is in woefully short supply. I'd like to hear you talk again...
— Black Mirror: Fifteen Million Merits
Craved a fight. I hoped youíd challenge me. Do I need to get you angrier? Do I need to push you harder? I could torment you, inflict pain on your teammates until youíre forced to throw all caution to the wind and come at me with everything youíve got. Or I could attack you on another level. Would you like me to tell you a story? We founded Cauldron. The Triumvirate. The Number Man. William Manton. The Doctor. We sold people powers. It meant more people with powers to fight the Endbringers, that was the lie we told ourselves. But we created the Siberian and Shatterbird, in a roundabout way. We created the Gray Boy, selling him powers, finding ourselves unable to stop him when he went out of bounds. There were countless others. Echidna is just the latest in a long series of grave mistakes. We made the PRT, pretended to let ourselves be run by the unpowered, but we put Alexandria in charge. We manipulated media, manipulated nations, in the interest of power. We ventured into alternate worlds to kidnap people, experimented on them to refine our formulas. And the failed tests? The people who turned out wrong? We cast them out, tossed them out as a bonus to anyone willing to pay a little more for an enemy that was guaranteed to lose against them. Thatís all you were, monsters. Little more than the cheap towels that are on offer for a few extra dollars when you buy something on a shopping channel. Itís all been a ploy from the start. Every single one of you were deceived. For every one of you that bought your powers, there were innocents who died or became monsters for the sake of that formulaís research. No matter what good you might do, it will never make up for that. And the rest of you? Conned, brought in with promises of ideals and saving the world. Youíre fools.
Sam: Seriously now, Raiden, isn't this all a bit much? Any decent lunatic would have quit after Mexico.
Raiden: Jetstream Sam.
Sam: I heard you chopped the lab director in half. Old habits die hard, eh, Jack? But now here you are, the child soldier, fighting for the children. Hahahahaha. Please. What do you really expect to accomplish here? Play savior to a bunch of brains... and what? Earn a medal?
Think about it, Jack. No matter how many Mexican kids we cut or Africans we bury, the first world looks away. No one gives a shit. Not the media, not the politicians — certainly not the average Joe. Too busy fretting over money, or sex... religion... fame...
Ah, but you're a man on a mission, aren't you... Gonna fix everything, just you and your little sword there. Solve everything with violence, is that it?
Raiden: My sword is a means to an end: to protect those you'd prey on.
Sam: Really? Lemme ask you: All those cyborgs you've killed, up to now... Maybe they weren't kids, but they were people. You ever think about them? When you're chopping them into hamburger?
Raiden: They're adults. They... made their choice.
Sam: Sure, they're adults. Sure, they signed up for this. Right on the dotted line of their PMC contract. Usually they're no strangers to war. In fact, many times they already lost a limb or two. Many times they were out of work and starving on the street. So yes... they sign up for surgery to fight God-knows-where. How else would you provide for your family when your country's embroiled in civil war? Pain receptors shut down, pumped full of fear-inhibiting nanomachines and sent right into the blender... your blender... But they made their choice, right? Open your eye and see, Raiden.
Raiden: I've seen plenty.
Sam: Then listen. Those battlefield emotions that the nanos suppress... Listen to them.
Scar: Oh, must this all end in violence? I'd hate to be responsible for the death of a family member...wouldn't you agree, Simba?
Simba: That's not gonna work, Scar. I've put it behind me.
Scar: Ah, but what about your faithful subjects? Have they put it behind them?
Nala: Simba, what is he talking about?
Scar: Ah, so you haven't told them your little secret. Well, Simba, now's your chance to tell them. Tell them who is responsible for Mufasa's death!
Sarabi: ...it's not true! Tell me it's not true!
Simba: It's true.
Scar: You see? He admits it! Murderer!
Simba: No, it was an accident!
Scar: If it weren't for you, Mufasa would still be alive! It's your fault he's dead! Do you deny it?
Scar: Then you're guilty!
Simba: No, I'm not a murderer!
Scar: Oh, Simba, you're in trouble again. But this time, Daddy isn't here to save you. And now everyone! Knows! WHY!
Yuri Orlov: Enjoy it.
Agent Jack Valentine: What?
Yuri: This. Tell me I'm everything you despise. That I'm the personification of evil. That I'm responsible for the breakdown of the fabric of society and world order. I'm a one man genocide. Say everything you want to say to me now. Because you don't have long.
Valentine: Are you paying attention? Or are you delusional? You have broken every arms embargo written. There is enough evidence here to put you away for consecutive life sentences. You are going to spend the next 10 years of your life going from a cell to a courtroom before you even start serving your time. I don't think you fully appreciate the seriousness of your situation!
Yuri: [Almost whispering] My family has disowned me. My wife and son have left me. My brother is dead. [Slightly louder] Trust me, I fully appreciate the seriousness of my situation. But I promise you, I won't spend a single second in a courtroom.
Valentine: You are delusional.
Yuri: I like you, Jack. Well... maybe not, but I understand you. Let me tell you what's going to happen, then this way you can prepare yourself. Soon there's going to be a knock on that door, [looks at interrogation room door] and you will be called outside. In the hall will be a man who outranks you. First he'll compliment you on the fine job you've done, that you're making the world a safer place, that you're to receive a commendation and a promotion... and then he's going to tell you that I am to be released. You're going to protest, you'll probably threaten to resign... but in the end I will be released. The reason I'll be released is the same reason you think I'll be convicted. I do rub shoulders with some of the most vile, sadistic men calling themselves leaders today. But some of these men are the enemies of your enemies. And while the biggest arms dealer in the world is your boss - the President of the United States, who ships more merchandise in a day than I do in a year... sometimes it's embarrassing to have his fingerprints on the guns. Sometimes he needs a freelancer like me to supply forces he can't be seen supplying. So, you call me evil, but unfortunately for you, I'm a necessary evil. beat [Somebody knocks on interrogation room door]