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"I run this mother-fucking town!"
Johnny Macmullen

Gold Standard is a 2018 Irish short film written and directed by Zac Goold.

We're introduced to two dim-witted hitmen Fergal (Bobby Calloway) and Liam (Shane Martin). They're hired by crime lord Johnny Mac (Thomas Leggett) to murder a boy with a lot of debt. In the process of the murder, they're spotted by a parking attendant Tom (Jack O'Byrne) - who unbeknownst to them is Johnny's son.

Johnny orders the boys to kill the witness, not realising it's his own son. Also being dragged into the fray is Tom's sister and Johnny's daughter Amber (Vanessa Schaefer) - who also has a one night stand with Liam. Hilarity does not ensue.



  • Affably Evil: Johnny Mac at first appears to be friendly and welcoming to the two boys. Then we find out what happens when you piss him off.
  • Affectionate Nickname: Fergal attempts to give Johnny the nickname 'Johnno'.
  • Amoral Attorney: Johnny has a lawyer called Damo who negotiates the fee for the murder.
  • Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking: Johnny chews the boys out for using his daughter, murdering his son and lying.
  • Badass Boast: Johnny's final speech "I run this town!"
  • Bald of Evil: Johnny's shifty lawyer Damo.
  • Bash Brothers: Liam and Fergal.
  • Beast and Beauty: Liam (beast) and Amber (beauty).
  • Blood Knight: Liam appears to be the more outwardly violent of the two hitmen, sadistically enjoying killing James.
  • Bound and Gagged:
    • One of Johnny's victims James is introduced this way.
    • Tom also ends up this way too.
  • Brainless Beauty: Fergal is better groomed than Liam and also quite the idiot.
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  • Comically Missing the Point: After getting briefed on their assignment, Fergal wonders why Butch is nicknamed so.
  • Dating Catwoman: Gender flipped where Amber doesn't know she's hooked up with a hitman.
  • Daylight Horror: Johnny Mac shooting everyone happens in broad daylight.
  • Didn't Think This Through: Fergal reported a bike illegally parked outside his house to the police...
    Liam: And you're about to kill a guy in public?
  • Establishing Character Moment:
    • Fergal's raisin monologue establishes that he's not the brightest bulb.
    • Johnny Mac's torture of James lets us know all we need to about him.
  • Even Evil Has Loved Ones: Johnny Mac seems to care for his son and daughter.
  • Everyone Loves Blondes: Amber is a beautiful and charismatic blonde.
  • Everything's Sparkly with Jewelry:
    • Johnny Mac wears a collection of rings.
    • Fergal has a gold chain and bracelet.
  • "Friends" Rent Control: Amber and Tom have a pretty nice house for two youngsters. Tom has a job as a parking attendant, but Amber's isn't stated. Given Johnny's control of the town, presumably his money pays for it.
  • From Bad to Worse: Liam and Fergal's hit gets witnessed and the witness is Johnny's son - who they then kill!
  • Funny Background Event: Fergal first orders a "small glass of Vodka" because by his logic, it's too early for shots. He gets served a shot glass, and can be seen pouting at it.
  • Fur and Loathing: Johnny Mac is introduced wearing a fur-lined coat.
  • Genki Guy: Fergal is pretty exuberant about a lot of things.
  • Gory Discretion Shot:
    • Tom getting clubbed to death with a shovel is shown only with the camera on Fergal.
    • When Liam is beating on Tom, it keeps cutting to Fergal's reactions.
  • Groin Attack: Fergal kicks Butch in the balls.
  • Hypocrite: Johnny claims to not be a fan of violence. Come the climax...
  • Irony: Tom becomes a witness to a hit his father ordered, and Johnny's ordering to tie up the loose ends kills him.
  • Kill 'Em All: Four characters die, including the two protagonists.
  • Let's Get Dangerous!: The ditzy Fergal is the one who shoots Butch dead and beats Tom to death with the shovel.
  • Mafia Princess: Implied with Amber.
  • Not Listening to Me, Are You?: Amber cops on that Tom hasn't been listening to her story about her one night stand.
  • The Oner: The final scene is all done in one take.
  • Ooh, Me Accent's Slipping: Bobby Calloway slips out of his Liverpool accent when he says "it's the kids who don't eat raisins..."
  • Red Shirt: James exists to be killed off to show that Johnny Mac means business and what Liam is capable of.
  • Seinfeldian Conversation: The first scene has Fergal going on a spiel about the difference between raisin eaters and non-raisin eaters.
  • Sidetracked by the Analogy: Fergal and Liam get into a ramble about how the shape eyebrows grow into.
  • Smoking Is Glamorous: Amber is introduced smoking, and it's used to show her as desirable for Liam.
  • The Smurfette Principle: Amber is the only female character in a cast of five prominent males.
  • Snark-to-Snark Combat: This is the meeting between Amber and Liam.
  • Straight Man and Wise Guy: Liam and Fergal respectively.
  • Suddenly SHOUTING!: "Do you KNOW HIS NAME?"
  • Title Drop: 'Gold Standard' refers to the monetary system of old - which is explained by Johnny's lawyer Damo.
  • Too Dumb to Live: The protagonists murder Tom even when they find out he's Johnny's son.
  • Unexplained Accent: Fergal despite his Irish name has a Liverpool accent.

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