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Tear Jerker / Deadpool

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What's this page for?! I never cry! Well, except maybe when Bea... *sniff*Pay no attention to the Cable & Deadpool page, or my film's page or even the page for the sequel either.

  • Back during my Weapon X days, I met the rejects and became buddies with them, Worm especially. We got a kick out of me making fun of our tormentor, but the laughter quickly ended.
  • During the run where my good ol' pops Joe was writing me I was going through a bit of a self-esteem trip and I needed to be with someone. So naturally I go with Siryn! Only to be rejected because of a tussle with Warpath (which wasn’t my fault by the way...) After a few hours which I spent drinking heavily, good ol’ Terry comes back and admits she loves me after all [1] Well.... turns out it was Typhoid Mary... and she did to prove she could.... I uh.... I need a moment.
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  • "That's the sort of thing people say when they're going to... die... and that's not you- you hear me! That's not... 'Nessa?"
  • And there's Uncanny X-Force #28, where I tell AOA Nightcrawler that X-Force is the closest thing to family I've ever had and that's why I let them blow me up...
  • During the my whole run in X-Force called up a meeting to discuss the little killing a kid thing. Good old Wolvey lectures me on how I'm only in it for the money, and after I walk off (Like a boss) Warren gives this gem.
    Logan: Cut him loose, Warren. Missions are delicate enough. Dirtbag Mercenary can't be trusted.
    Warren: He never cashed my checks, Logan. Working for me for over a year. Never cashed a one.
  • On my mission with Captain America and Wolverine, finding out that I had a daughter.
    • While we're at it, the possibility that I would never see her again so that she'd have a shot at a normal life. Damn you Posehn and Dugann, damn you... *sniff* I'M NOT CRYING, I'M NOT!
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  • Wolverine: Origins #24 I totally snap at Logan, telling him what a f#$%ing baby he is for being willing to sacrifice all the friends he has and the chance to move on with his life, friends and a chance I may never have, just to go out for revenge.
    Me: I’m the one who should be out for revenge…
  • Deadpool #34 is a happy and joyful ride through the days of my birth, with artwork designed to look like Dad's! Look, you can't see anyone's feet anywhere, it's great! Until... well, I don't remember what happened, but it turns out I was brainwashed by Butler at the time. And he gave me a test. To see how much control he had on me, he ordered me to do something really, really bad. And... I don't remember what he told me to do. Sabertooth knows, but he's not telling.
  • Gerry Duggan & Brian Posehn's run ending with me and my friends and family getting caught in that incursion fiasco. At least I get to hold Ellie one last time. note 
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  • There was this time that I ran into the Ghost Rider, and he slapped me with his whole Penance Stare thing. It's supposed to make you relive your sins and all, right? The people you've hurt the most, all your regrets and fears? You know what I saw? I saw me.

  • Had Maria Hill not monkeyed around with the Cosmic Cube, we wouldn't have Cap get replaced by his evil clone who tricked me into killing both Coulson and Preston, losing Ellie, being forced into doing Stryfe's dirty work, and placing a hit on myself. There is some cartharsis in this: Watching Hill's MCU incarnation get dusted! Duggan's run end with me deleting most of my memoriesnote .
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