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- The 5 Mrs. Buchanans : In the episode "Heart of the Matter?" Roy agrees not to play in an alumni football game because his wife, Alex, believes he will get hurt. When Mother Buchanan (the family's domineering matriarch) finds out, she is furious. She insists that Roy play in the game to uphold the Buchanan family tradition. When Roy mentions that Alex doesn't want him to, Mother Buchanan tells him, "Roy Buchanan, I did not raise you to be dictated to by some overbearing woman."
- 30 Rock:
Jack: "Kidz" is a hit the whole family can watch together, not your usual sitcom crap full of gratuitous vulgarity and pratfalls.
- There's one in its signature meta-joke style, where Liz and Jack are discussing America's Kidz Got Singing, a singing competition show NBC is airing:
(man in the background slips and falls)
Man: Ohh, my penis!
Liz: Hey, when this movie airs, can my name be the first credit that comes up at the end?
- Another episode has Liz writing a TV movie Jack is producing, which ends with this exchange:
Jack: This is a group process Lemon, don't be an egomaniac.
(camera pans to a TV that says "Executive Producer Lorne Michaels")
- The ITV documentary A-Z of Comedy had Ian Hislop doing S is for Satire, concluding that ultimately the message of satire is that nobody is above ridicule. His Spitting Image puppet then pops up and goes into a routine making fun of him. The real Hislop's reaction is "That's pathetic! It doesn't even look like me!"
- Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. has a moment where Coulson criticizes an ancient organization for their Sigil Spam, pointing out that the attention it draws is the reason he removed the eagle logos from the S.H.I.E.L.D. vans. Bobbi Morse responds thusly:
Bobbi: You know, we have a ginormous eagle on top of our jet.
Coulson: Sometimes I can't help myself with the cool.
- Siegfried from All Creatures Great and Small has a bad habit of blaming his mistakes on other people, as well as criticizing them for faults he also possesses. And he does it so sanctimoniously.
James: You know the one thing I can't stand about your brother, Tris? It's when he gets patient with you. He gets this saintly look on his face and you know that any moment now he's going to forgive you. For something he's just done.
- Ms. Hushbaum, the Loud Librarian from All That?
- On Amen, after Reverend Gregory has fainted, effectively ending his and Thelma's wedding. Thelma is freaking out, shaking him and demanding that he wake up.
Deacon Frye: "Thelma, calm down! I know you're disappointed, but we have to call off the wedding! So what if I'm out $10,000. $10,000! (Grabs Reuben and starts shaking him the same way Thelma was) Wake up! Wake up! How could you do this to me!"(Minister grabs the Deacon)Minister: "Ernest, pull yourself together man! Money isn't everything!"Deacon: "I'm glad to hear you say that, because if there's no wedding, you don't get paid!"Minister: (grabs Reuben and starts shaking him) "Wake up! Wake up!"
- Angel. A Running Gag with Doyle's character.
Doyle: It's not all about fighting and gadgets and such. It's about reaching out to people, showing them that there's love and hope still left in the world....Homeless Woman: (interrupting) Hey, spare change?Doyle: Get a job, you lazy sow!
- Arrested Development is the king of this. Among countless other examples:
Michael: Some people are just impossible to have a conversation with.Lucille: If that's a veiled attempt to insult me, I didn't hear it, and I won't respond to it.
- The examples from this show could fit a whole page.
- In Auction Kings, Paul ends up owing his own auction house money after he buys some art and doesn't pay. Cindy spends the whole episode harassing him about it.
- Austin and Ally: Trish has been fired from numerous jobs and proceeds to call Austin and Ally lazy.
- In the Babylon 5 episode "The Geometry of Shadows", technomage Elric refutes Londo's false denial about pestering Elric for an a event of Vir delivering just such a request. Londo complains, "Recording a conversation __ a very low thing to do." as the screen cuts to a shot of the hidden camera Londo had just planted in Sherifian's office.
- Elric calls him on it. Explosively.
- 60's Batman, having just encountered The Green Hornet in a window
Robin (whispering): Gosh Batman, what do they dress like that for?
- In the story where the Penguin and Batman are running for mayor of Gotham City, the Penguin makes a great show of declaring that he will not engage in mudslinging, and immediately insinuates that Batman is often seen with known criminals because Batman himself is a criminal.
- The Bazura Project's episode on bad language in cinema has a segment where the white male hosts are dismissive of a woman's complaints about gendered insults (bitch, slut, etc) in films, but take offense at a woman calling a man a "jerk". Then they show a bunch of scenes with racist language, and object to "What are you gonna do about it, whitey?".
- Better Call Saul: When Jimmy sabotages Chuck by forging documents, and Chuck confronts him on it, Chuck says "I can't stand the fact that my own brother stabbed me in the back!" This coming from Chuck, who throughout the show has been stabbing Jimmy in the back by blocking his attempts to get a job at HHM and attempting to sabotage his chances with Davis & Main.
- The Big Bang Theory:
Penny: What the hell's going on?Sheldon: (With genuine anger) You hypocrite!Penny: What?Sheldon: Little Miss "grown-ups don't play with toys"! If I went into that apartment right now, would I not find Beanie Babies? Are you not an accumulator of Care Bears and My Little Ponies? And who is that Japanese feline frolicking on your shorts? Hello, Hello Kitty!
- Done by Sheldon of all people, during the episode "The Nerdvanna Annihilation". After Penny derides Leonard for his toy collection, driving him into such a depression that he gives them all away, Sheldon gives her a well-deserved "The Reason You Suck" Speech:
- Sheldon is most often on the "hypocrite" side of these:
*someone knocks on the door*Leonard: Want to get that?Sheldon: Not particularly.Leonard: Could you get that?Sheldon: I suppose I could, if I were asked.Leonard: Would you please get that?Sheldon: Well, of course. *gets up to answer the door* Why do you have to make things so complicated?
- Penny: Oh look, they're doing that fake 'linked-arms drinking thing'. I totally taught him that!
- An episode of Blake's 7 where Vila, the character noted for his lockpicking abilities, is trying to get out of a hatch that is stuck. He opts instead for Percussive Maintenance.
Avon: (on vox) Use your delicate, skillful touch.(Vila kicks the hatch open instead)Vila: I used my delicate, skillful boot.
- A quote from an episode of Brooklyn Nine-Nine:
Santiago: You handled this really well, Peralta, I take back what I said about you being immature.Peralta: Oh. Apology accepted, Fart-monster.
- Buffy the Vampire Slayer:
- In the episode "Earshot" Wesley points out that since Buffy can hear everyone's thoughts, it would take mental discipline to not broadcast their thoughts to Buffy. Within seconds, Wesley thinks about Cordelia in a highly inappropriate way. Buffy smirks at Wesley, and he excuses himself from the room in embarrassment.
- Also from Earshot is this:
Xander: Hogan Martin thinks he's sooooo hot. Like we should all be awed by him 'cause he can put a ball in the net.Hogan: Hey, Xander.Xander: He said my name. He knows my name.
- In the Musical Episode "Once More With Feeling" Spike's song is all about how he wishes Buffy would get away from him as his unrequited feelings for her are tearing him up. When Buffy flees at the end of the song, Spike calls out pitiably, "So, you're not staying then?"
- In "A New Man" Giles is turned into a demon, but declares that he won't start acting like a monster just because he looks like one. Then he sees Professor Walsh, who pissed him off earlier in the episode, and chases her down the street roaring loudly.
- Giles also comes out with the following in "Primeval":
Xander, just because this is never going to work there's no need to be negative.
- Cordelia does this a lot, especially in her early Alpha Bitch phase.
Cordelia: Senior boys are the only way to go. Guys from our grade, forget about it, they're children. Y'know? Like Jesse. Did you see him last night, following me around like a little puppy dog. You just wanna put him to sleep. But senior boys, hmm, they have mystery. They have... What's the word I'm searching for? Cars! I just am not the type to settle. Y'know? It's like when I go shopping. I have to have the most expensive thing. Not because it's expensive, but because it costs more.
Girl: You know, I—
Cordelia: Hello, Miss Motormouth, can I get a sentence finished?
- In Breakout Kings, in the episode "Cruz Control," the team is chasing a terminally ill escaped convict who is killing other criminals, and the team of Boxed Crooks discusses whether they really should bother to catch him.
Erica: Regardless of whom he's taking out, you can't appoint yourself judge, jury, and executioner.Shea: Good point. What's your tattoo stand for again? Wait, is that the Chinese symbol for "hypocrite"?Erica: Still got room for one more, Shea.Shea: Allegedly though, right?
- The humor is that the tattoo is in fact a series of hash-marks that Erica used to check off the men she allegedly murdered to avenge the murder of her father.
- In Season 8 of Canada's Worst Driver from host Andrew Younghusband:
Andrew: As the host of Canada's Worst Driver, I'm not allowed to curse, but holy (bleep) (bleep) balls, Flora scared the living (bleep) (bleep) out of me.
- In Castle, this trope is used often and well, typically with some other character around to lampshade it.
Martha: [chuckling] You really are something, you know? You always think everything's about you. [Hands him a stack of leaflets]] Here.Castle: What are these?Martha: Oh, they're fliers for my play. I thought you could hand them out when you were signing books tomorrow.
- Martha can often be relied upon to provide humour of this nature; such as, the night before one of Rick's book launches:
- In a later episode, both Castle and Beckett have gone out on separate dates and ended up at the same very exclusive restaurant. They spent the entire time preoccupied with the Body of the Week and had a tendency to slip away from their supposed dates to confer about the case with each other. Finally, they bailed entirely and the dates hooked up with one another. At the end of the episode, as Castle and Beckett go out to grab a bite to eat at a burger joint, they swap notes on their dates earlier that evening, remarking that they seemed 'boring' and 'a little self-absorbed':
Castle: Some people just don't know how to behave on a date.Beckett: Especially on a first date.
- Martha walks in on Castle and Alexis playing poker (also a Shout-Out to Casablanca).
Martha: I am shocked that there is gambling in this house! Deal me in.
- In "Double Down", Beckett is upset to learn that Castle made a bet that he and Beckett could solve their case before Ryan and Esposito could solve theirs. After getting a lead on their case, Beckett tells Castle, "One hundred dollars on us."
- In another episode, Castle tries to talk to Alexis, who just interrupted movie night with her dad because her boyfriend wants to talk to her: "I mean, think about what kind of signal you're sending if you're the one always rearranging your schedule at the other one's every beck and call. I mean, if you just drop everything the very moment that..." At which point Beckett calls him, and he drops everything.
- In "The Squab and the Quail", a billionaire playboy is threatened with murder. He pulls strings with the commissioner to get Beckett assigned as his bodyguard rather than a uniformed police officer. Castle complains, "I just can't believe that the department is forcing her to hang around with some womanizing rich guy against her will!" Ryan and Esposito share a look; this is the entire premise of the series, and Castle is usually the womanizing rich guy in question.
- In "3XK", when Montgomery's profiling the murderer Castle remarks that he shares several similarities with Montgomery's profile. When Montgomery gets to "has a menial, unimportant job," Beckett (slightly snidely) points out that this means the killer is "definitely you." Quick as a flash, Castle casually remarks that in that case, he'll base his next bestselling mystery novel on Esposito instead. Beckett looks genuinely shocked and insulted. You were saying something about "menial and unimportant", Beckett?
- One of the most popular types of joke on the sitcom Cheers.
Norm: Woody you can't go sneaking out nights on someone you love! Woody you have to believe that truth-"Carla: "Norm your wife Vera's on the phone!"Norm: "I'm not here.(back to Woody)- and honesty are the cornerstones of a relationship!"
- In another episode, the guys see recurring French Jerk Henri walk into the bar:
Barfly 1: Hey isn't that that French guy who's trying to steal Woody's girlfriend?Cliff: Yeah, what a slimebag.Barfly 2: The man's got the morals of a snake.Norm: Can't believe he'd show his face in here.Henri: (smiles and waves) Hello fellows!Norm and the others: (very cheerfully) Hey Henri! How you doin'?
- The Colbert Report:
- Stephen Colbert briefly shared a story about how he once found one of his teenage staff members out back smoking with his friends while wearing an anti-smoking T-shirt. When questioned, he replied that he "thought it was funny."
- Stephen, distraught over the loss of Hillary Clinton's presidential campaign, looks up the Five Stages of Grief. "Stage One... Denial. I've never had that."
- Frankly, Stephen Colbert's whole point of existence is Hypocritical Humor, ever since he was an anchor on The Daily Show, which also frequently points out Truth in Television examples.
Britta: "Ow! Real mature." [She leaves]
- After Senor Chang has ordered the class to 'turn on' Britta, resulting in her being pelted with paper.
Senor Chang: [Childishly] "That's right, we are mature! Too mature to sit in a class with a cheating lying poop-face!"
[Britta has long since left the room]
- When they're all panicking about Britta's psych test showing one of them is a potential murderer (turns out it's all of them except Abed):
Annie: Stay back psychos! Or I'll slit your throats and bathe in your blood!
- And probably the best example yet, the opening scene of season 3:
- In general, Britta and Shirley tend to generate this kind of humor most frequently (although the others certainly aren't immune to it), Britta because she's a Soapbox Sadie Granola Girl who's not nearly as committed to her causes as she likes others to think she is, and Shirley because she's The Fundamentalist who thinks that she's the group's conscience without quite realising her own flaws.
- Also, when Britta accuses Annie of hiding her own pen to save face in "Cooperative Calligraphy"
Annie: [To Britta] I'm not hiding my own pen, you paranoid weirdo! [To everyone else] Everyone stay within each other's sight lines, one of you is a monster.
- Corner Gas:
Oscar: (to Emma) Your son is turning the gas station into a movie theatre!Brent: Keep in mind that Dad does have a tendency to overstate these things.Oscar: I've never overstated a single thing in the history of the planet!
- The following exchange occurs:
Karen: She seems quick to judge. I noticed that right away about her.
- Coupling: Sally does not react well when Howard agrees with something Jeff says:
Sally: It's homophobic, you stupid queen!
- CSI: A crime scene clean-up guy who's working on Nick and Warrick's scene has just got through pontificating about respect for the dead when they find an unexpected second body shoved in a video game cabinet. The first words out of his mouth? "Holy mackerel, bitch in a box!"
- On Crazy Ex-Girlfriend, Rebecca sings about how she's a good person...while threatening people with a knife. "Say it! Say it or I'll kill your husband! I'll gut him like a fish!"
- Private Frazer in Dad's Army is quite fond of loudly expressing one bitterly-held and often contentious viewpoint, only to immediately switch to loudly expressing its exact opposite when it no longer becomes prudent to hold the first viewpoint.
- The Daily Show:
- Jon Stewart criticized the 2010 British election debates, saying: "Your moderator is named Alastair Stewart! What kind of last name is Stewart?"
- Bonus joke if you know Stewart wasn't Jon's original last name.note
- Also pointed out and derided via an "epithet ticker" when Sarah Palin defended Dr. Laura Shlesinger's career (a hasty retirement after using the N-word) in a Tweet - mere months after calling for Rahm Emanuel's job for using the word "retard"... which, incidentally, was up five points.
- Oh beautiful, oblivious hypocrisy! Jason Jones tries to convince a Democrat to stop pointing the finger, but the message won't get through.
- Daredevil: In "World on Fire," Wilson Fisk tells the other crime lords that he killed Anatoly. He explains that they'll make Anatoly's brother Vladimir think the Devil of Hell's Kitchen was responsible, at least, until they are ready to make a move against him, saying "We all knew that we would need to eliminate the Russians one day. They were too unpredictable." This, as Leland Owlsley points out, coming from a man who just decapitated Anatoly with a car door because the guy interrupted his date with Vanessa.
- Dear White People: When Al complains about how Apple uses child slave labor in China to manufacture its phones, his phone starts going off. Guess what phone it is?
- Detectorists: Andy listens to Lance tell a story about a treasure hunter and muses derisively, "The things people will do for gold!" He then shoulders his expensive metal detector.
- In the second episode of Dexter's third season, Dexter is trying to track down the address of a recent murder victim; his searches take him to a sorority house during a party. When he asks two of the girl's sisters if they know her, they dismissively state that she's a "total ho bag". Then they ask Dexter if he's got any drugs. "We put out."
- A Different World The students are volunteering at a community center in a poor neighborhood when Whitley' s wallet is stolen. When she makes a snarky comment about she should have expected it from "people like that", Dwayne blasts her for her elitist attitude—then hurries off, having just realized that he forgot his computer at the center.
- In one episode of Diagnosis: Murder, Community General Hospital's IT system is brought to its knees by a virus; Hospital Administrator Norman Briggs hires an IT engineer to restore the system and asks him to give the staff a lecture on proper computer usage to remind them that their computer terminals are not toys. At the end of the lecture, the engineer tells the crowd that the virus causing the problem is often found in copies of a particular computer game... which Norman has installed on his terminal.
- Doctor Who. Happens with the Doctor all the time, as his Awesome Ego is a Running Gag.
The Doctor: We're the most civilised civilisation in the universe. We're billions of years beyond your petty human obsession with gender and its associated stereotypes.
Bill: But you still call yourselves Time Lords?
The Doctor: Yeah... Shut up.
- Drake & Josh: In the episode "Driver's License", Drake and Josh talk about they being now mature, just before fighting over the "purple controller" and tackle each other down.
- In the episode "Josh is Done", when Drake is forced by Mr. Roland to work with Clayton due to Josh working with a new lab partner, Craig and Eric make fun of Clayton for being a nerd, even though they are nerds themselves.
- In "The Battle of Panthatar", when Josh makes a loud crying noise as Thornton un-invites him and Drake to his 16th birthday party (due to Drake unknowingly kissing his girlfriend, Maria), Crazy Steve steps in and tells the group "No yelling in the theater area", but when a woman interrupts him by asking him where the women's restroom is, he replies by shouting "I AM TALKING TO PEOPLE!!!"
- Mimi from The Drew Carey Show constantly makes fun of Drew's weight, calling him names like 'pig', despite the fact that she's noticably bigger than he is.
- Drop the Dead Donkey:
- Sally is often guilty of this, to the point where her colleagues made a montage of her saying "I'm not one to complain, but..." And she responded to this by turning to George and saying...
- In another episode, Helen finally tells her mother she's gay. Her mother responds that she knows, and it's probably hereditary because she had some same-sex relationships herself. Helen spends the rest of the episode outraged that her mother has been keeping this from her for years.
- The Ferguson Theory (a BBC Scotland sketch show starring Craig Ferguson before he moved to the US) had a sketch in which a character criticised evidence of racism in the British government, before concluding "But what do you expect from the bloody English?"
- Firefly: Wash pulls one of these off early in "Bushwhacked''.
Zoe: Proximity alert. Must be coming up on something.
Wash: Oh my god. What can it be? We're doomed! WHO'S FLYING THIS THING?
Wash: Oh. Right. That'd be me.
- In his debut episode of the 90's version of The Flash, the Trickster is about to chainsaw a woman in half in front of an "audience" of mannequins.
Megan Lockhart: Go to hell!
Trickster: Watch your language — this is a family show!
(The Flash runs in and pushes her out of the way at superspeed)
Trickster: ... the hell are you?
- Frasier :
- This Cheers Spin-Off also uses this a lot.
Roz: Frasier's a good guy, he's smart, he's sweet, and way too good for you. Why don't you just leave, nobody here likes you anyway.
Julia: Frasier seems to.
Roz: Well he's an idiot.
- In the episode where the Cheers regulars show up, the lazy bar-fly Norm hits it off with Marty. When time comes for them to part company, Marty invites Norm to catch up if ever Norm's in Seattle:
Marty: It's only six hours flying time from Boston to Seattle.
Norm: Six hours...you know sittin' there in one place, never movin'. That's, that's just not me, you know?
- There's also a bit where it looks like Frasier is going to be compelled to tell the truth about Niles' feelings for Daphne at Niles' divorce deposition, thus ruining his chance of getting anything in the settlement and exposing his feelings for Daphne. Martin urges him to just lie, but Frasier feels his ethics forbid this. After the resulting argument, Frasier storms out, and Martin sneers about how Frasier buckles under pressure, and how "some of us [i.e. him] can deal with a tough situation head on, and others just need an escape'... whilst he's pouring himself a stiff drink and Niles has retreated to his 'safe place' under the piano.
- From "Shrink Rap":
Frasier: I am so tired of your exaggeration! You always make things sound 50,000 times worse than they really are!
- Frasier runs on this trope, in both its one-liner and more subtle forms. The very premise of the show is a form of this trope — a brilliant psychiatrist who is always giving people advice on how to fix their problems, but can't figure out his own neuroses or relationships to save his life.
- This Cheers Spin-Off also uses this a lot.
- In the For Want of a Nail episode, The One That Could Have Been, Rachel wishes her and her husband Barry were "on a break" so that she could sleep with Joey.
- In "The One With The Evil Orthodontist", Chandler spends the whole episode fretting about a woman he went on a date with not calling him back, and whether or not he should call her. When she comes round to the coffee shop to explain she had his number wrong, he thinks going to the trouble makes her look needy.
- In the same episode, there's someone in the building across the street with a telescope trained on their apartment building. The gang are horrified by this invasion of privacy, but then get distracted when they notice Ugly Naked Guy has got gravity boots.
- In The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner, Ginger's fake leg freaks out Chandler and she tells him he has to get used to it as a part of her. Then when they start making out she makes an excuse and runs off after finding out about and getting grossed out by Chandler's third nipple.
- In "The One With The Fertility Test", Phoebe believes that Swedish massages are an evil corperation even though she works at a Swedish spa herself.
- In Freaks and Geeks, Daniel tells Kim he's "just trying to be rational" about why Lindsay's parents would disapprove of her. Kim does not appreciate it.
Kim: Are you calling me irrational? Because I'll tear your head off, Daniel. I'll tear it off and throw it over that fence.
- Game of Thrones:
- In the pilot, King Robert arrives in Winterfell to offer the right-hand post in his royal council to his old ally Ned Stark. The moment they meet again, the Adipose Rex says that Ned Stark has gotten fat over the years. Ned motions to King Robert's noticeable gut, and they laugh it off, showing how close they are with each other.
- In arguably one of the darkest uses of this trope imaginable, Ramsay Snow has cut off Theon's "favorite toy". Later, just to fuck with his mind, he starts eating a conspicuous phallic shape in front of him. After a few seconds of silence, Ramsay reacts with mock horror that Theon would really think this. He responds with this:
Ramsay: Nooooo. Pork sausage. Do you think I'm some sort of savage?
- On The George Lopez Show, after Benny and George have argued with a racist:
Benny: That's just like white people, taking one group and saying they're all the same!
- Paris from Gilmore Girls was annoyed with the fact that she couldn't find a soup kitchen to volunteer in on Thanksgiving because they were all overflowing with volunteers. "Who are all these jackasses who volunteered anyway? They can't all be students like me. They're not all putting it on a college application. I get something out of it and these other people don't get a thing. Talk about selfish!"
- Gimme a Break!: When Nell's sister, Loretta, got married, it was announced that their mother would move to California to live with Nell, something that Nell desperately DID NOT WANT. In one scene, Nell tried to talk Chief Kanisky out of letting her mother live with them, by asking him, "Do you know what it would be like to have some pushy, loud-mouthed, know-it-all black lady move into your house and take over?!" After a pause, the Chief replied, "Yeah."
- Good Luck Charlie: In "Duncan's Got Talent", Ivy calls Spencer a chicken for not telling Teddy that she can't dance, but she didn't tell her either.
- The basic concept of Michelle in Grownups; a nutritionist who constantly eats junk food.
- On the 1970s-90s country music/comedy series Hee Haw, the recurring Gossip Girls sketch started with the actresses claiming that they never spread gossip in the following lyrics: "Now, we're not ones to go 'round spreadin' rumors, Why, really we're just not the gossipy kind, No, you'll never hear one of us repeating gossip, So you'd better be sure and listen close the first time!"
- On an episode of Hello Cheeky, Denis addresses the camera.
Denis: Hi, fans. It's me again — Mr. Lovable. (turns to other band members) Will you shut up when I'm talking?!
- When Greg House puts speed in Wilson's coffee to test if Wilson is on anti-depressants, Wilson is rather livid. Later in that episode comes the revelation that Wilson has been dosing House with anti-depressants. Wilson may have actually been angry at House for deliberately putting him at risk of dangerous medication interactions- but that becomes Hypocritical Humor when he follows up his rant with "give me a Vicodin before I have a stroke."
- In another episode he made a remark about feminists supposedly not shaving often enough.
- On multiple occasions, House has criticized someone for doing drugs immediately before popping a Vicodin pill.
- On Home Improvement, Wilson's reaction to Jill telling him that Tim is getting an honorary Ph.D. (Wilson had worked his butt off to earn his Ph.D. the normal way, and Jill was in the process of doing the same.)
Wilson: I've never been a proponent of the symbolic gesture, but Tim is your husband, and he is my neighbor. We should be happy.Jill: (sigh) You're right.Wilson: A Ph.D.?! TIM?!
- How I Met Your Mother:
Narrator Ted: On the night of Stewart and Claudia's wedding, reality was the enemy.Bridesmaid: The Peace Corps?Barney: Yeah. I ship out tomorrow. Two Years. Some people say the Peace Corps is the most noble thing one can do. To those people I say, is it? And most of them say, yes it is.
Ted: So, kids, Kathy couldn't stop talking. Can you imagine how awful that is?Kids: ...
- The Framing Device is an older Ted telling his children how he met his current wife, and so far he's been telling this story for six seasons to his eternally bored looking kids. One of his stories has Ted finding out that he can't stand his new girlfriend anymore because she just won't shut up.
- In "Okay Awesome," after Lily tracks Marshall down to a club he ditched their boring wine-tasting party to go to, we get this conversation:
Lily: He just left! In the middle of our own party! You don't do that.Robin: ...Lily: Unless, of course, you're chasing after somebody who's already done it, and then...and then I think it's okay. *trails off*
- In "Zip Zip Zip", Lily claims that throwing the bouquet is an evil tradition, but when Ted asks her if she is planning on doing it in her wedding with Marshall Lily says she will.
- In "Belly Full of Turkey," Robin mocks Ted by pointing out that America is the world's leader in handgun violence. However, Ted Doesn't Like Guns while Robin owns several of them, subscribes to Guns and Ammo, and goes to the firing range when she needs to blow off steam. In addition, she's actually threatened people with guns at least twice that we've seen (Gael's friends and a pair of thieves who tried to steal her TV) and suggested that Marshall do the same when he's afraid his boss will fire him.
- In "How Lily Stole Christmas", Lily is offended that Ted called her a grinch and then calls him "assface".
- Robin's therapist tells her he's moving to Alaska. Turns out he had to stop seeing her because he was attracted to her.
Robin: [offended] So you dumped me as a patient so you could ask me out?Therapist: I'm not asking you out!Robin: [disappointed] You're not asking me out?
- In The Flash (2014) episode "Flash vs. Arrow", Oliver Queen visits Central City to ask for the help of Star Labs with some analysis. While that's happening, he decides to train Barry to be a better superhero. Before said training, he tells Barry that they'll have discuss his use of "silly code names" for his enemies. This is coming from the guy who regularly uses similar code names for his own enemies. Barry points this out by asking if the aforementioned discussion will be "over coffee with Deathstroke and The Huntress."
- iCarly: Many of the episodes use this a lot. Each character even has at least one of these.
- While Gibby walks out of the studio:
Carly: Poor kid. It must feel bad to love someone who doesn't love you back.Freddie: (turns to stare at Carly)Carly: Sorry.
- When the gang is cleaning up the mess of the police stakeout:
Sam: Some people just have no manners. (throws an empty soda can on the floor for Freddie to pick up)
- After Spencer's high-powered sculpture destroyed their longest webcast World Record attempt:
Spencer: Hey guys, don't make me look guilty, like it was all my fault.Carly, Sam, Freddie: (ALL stare at Spencer)Spencer: Oh yeah.
- When discussing the Dingo Channel:
Spencer: Aw, I hate that channel! They always make adults look like buffoons!Carly: You forgot to wear pants.Spencer: Oh my God.
- While Gibby walks out of the studio:
- In a recurring In Living Color! skit, Kim Wayans played an inner city woman named Miss Benita Buttrel, who would often decry the gossip surrounding several figures in her neighborhood...and then proceed to bury them under rumor and slander in the ugliest way possible. Nearly every time she was finished talking about someone, she would then add on, "But I ain't one to gossip, so you didn't hear that from me."
- During the 2016 presidential race, Donald Trump's inflammatory rhetoric, and the release of an Access Hollywood tape of him making lewd remarks, caused some Republicans up for re-election to unendorse him. However, pressure from the Trump Republican base caused some of those Republicans who denounced him to un-unendorse him so as not to anger those who might vote for him. Put it another way, they denounced Trump as a terrible candidate but said they'd vote for him. Best shown with Pennsylvania Senator Pat Toomey, whose indecisiveness prompted Jimmy Kimmel Live to create a parody ad:
Toomey Impressionist: I'm Pat Toomey. Let me be perfectly clear where I stand on Donald Trump. I think he's a national embarrassment and a disgrace. A disgraceful embarrassment who I am proud to support for President of the United States. Donald Trump is exactly what this country needs: a man with no idea what he's talking about, a man with no respect for democracy or common decency. A man who is totally unfit for office. And I am proud to support him for office. [anti-Trump] You're not. [pro-Trump] Yes I am. [anti-Trump] Am not! [pro-Trump] Am so! [anti-Trump] Are not! [pro-Trump] Am too! [anti-Trump] Shut up! [pro-Trump] You shut up!Narrator: When it comes to Donald Trump, Pat Toomey's position is clear.Toomey Impressionist: Yes/no. [Both "yes" and "no" appear on the screen, overlaying each other]The real Pat Toomey: I'm Pat Toomey, and I approve this message.Toomey Impressionist: You're not.
- Jessie: In "World Wide Web of Lies", Christina tells Jessie she has her under 24 hour surveillance and then complains about being under 24 hour surveillance herself by the paparazzi.
- Just Shoot Me!:
- This was half of Maya's repertoire, aside from shrill activism. Oddly enough, there were other times where they didn't seem to be playing it as a gag, she just was... hypocritical. (For instance, deriding Elliot for his nerdy looks back in high school.) In fact there were times where this seemed to be a Family-Unfriendly Aesop, implying that others were being unreasonable in asking her to stop berating someone over their looks or social status, or for her to apologize for doing so.
- Jack was also prone to it, especially where Maya is concerned. He tries to make her break up with a much older boyfriend in one episode, despite being married to one of Maya's high school friends.
- In Lark Rise To Candleford, Dorcas Lane has a tendency to describe whatever vice/indulgence she's about to enjoy — fine food, fine baths, clothes, etc — as "my one weakness."
- Robbie is one of the most active people in LazyTown due to his schemes...despite said schemes revolving around making the tow's citizens lazy and unhealthy. Lampshaded in one of the episodes where Sportacus points out how active the villain really is.
- Life On Mars: While on a drug-related case with Sam, Gene admits that his brother was an addict and that he could never understand why. Sam mentions that addiction is usually a sign of something missing at home.
Gene: Yeah, but me and 'im were brought up exactly the same. I'm not addicted. (Takes a drink from his hip-flask).
- Mad About You : Ira attempts to bribe a college professor into letting Jamie into his class. When Ira asks what he teaches, the professor coolly replies, "Ethics." In their very next scene, the professor is taking Ira's money and approving Jamie's entry into his class.
- In an episode of Made in Canada, Richard Strong tells the star of their most popular show to get hair replacement surgury in Mexico, where it's much cheaper. Cut to a report of him dying of post-operative infection "I begged him not to get those hair implants.".
- MADtv: There's a sketch spoofing Law & Order where the Cold Open of random people finding a corpse is either nonsensical or unnecessarily elaborate. It includes a mafia hit man interrupting one of his kills (strangling someone to death with a cord for being a rat) because he's shocked to find a nearby corpse he wasn't aware of.
- Married... with Children, Al spends many episodes insulting females for being unattractive despite the fact that he's just as unattractive.
- In its first couple of seasons, they would often show Majors Burns and Houlihan spying on and expressing disgust at the sexual dalliances of the other characters... which would get the Majors so horny they'd immediately start fooling around themselves.
- In a later season, Hawkeye and B.J. start riffing on famous Shakespearean phrases ("Friends, Romans and Countrymen, lend me your ears, I promise to return them.") Winchester counters with a straight reading of the Hamlet line, "There are more things in Heaven and Earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy." Hawkeye replies, "Man, if there's one thing I hate it's someone who butchers Shakespeare."
- Another instance:
Klinger: It was all just a misunderstanding; I would never try to bribe an officer! (beat) Ten bucks to forget the whole thing.
- Another example:
Frank: The way I see it, unless we each conform, unless we obey orders, unless we follow our leaders blindly, there is no possible way we can remain free.
- And another:
Charles: I won it in a debate. "Should the U.S. permit more liberal immigration?" I, of course, took the negative. My family has had problems with immigrants ever since we came to America.
- In one early episode, Radar asks Henry to sign a form:
Henry: I don't want to sign anything, Radar. You sign it.Radar: (after signing) Sir, would you sign that I signed?Henry: I'll sign that. (signs)
- On McLeod's Daughters, Claire chastises Jodie for believing that she's been cursed for tearing up a chain letter, saying that there is no justification for superstition. She immediately proceeds to knock a container of salt and throws it over her shoulder.
Adrian Monk: Are you drinking that?
- In the episode "Mr. Monk and the Leper". When Monk overreacts to shaking hands with a leper (who turns out to have been a phony), Natalie has to talk him out of lighting his hand on fire, acting all calm and reasonable. Cut to later in the episode, when Natalie makes out with Dr. Aaron Polanski, an expert on leprosy, who knows the disease well because he reveals that he had the disease. She freaks out, drinking hot water directly out of her house faucet and telling Julie to fill a bathtub with Listerine. The next day, when Monk and Natalie go to Mandy Bronson's house to investigate, Monk is disturbed to see Natalie drinking a bottle of mouthwash:
Natalie Teeger: [gulps] Mmm-hmm!
Adrian Monk: Whereís the woman whoís been lecturing me all week about compassion and tolerance?!
Natalie Teeger: Okay, you know what? Itís not funny! You didnít have your tongue down his throat!
Adrian Monk: Well I shook hands with one! Thatís bad enough!
Natalie Teeger: Your leper wasnít even a real leper! My leper was the real deal!
Adrian Monk: I thought he was real! Thatís what counts! You know the old saying, ďThere is no heart so black as the black, black heart of the Phony LeperĒ?
Natalie Teeger: No! I never heard that one!
- Also, in "Mr. Monk and the Voodoo Curse," Randy cites his astrological sign - a Pisces - as the reason he isn't superstitious.
- In "Mr. Monk Gets Cabin Fever," Monk has witnessed a gang shooting and is in Witness Protection under Agent Grooms. On their way to the safehouse, they stop at the general store to stock up on supplies, and Agent Grooms tells Monk, Natalie and Stottlemeyer to not do anything that could draw attention to themselves.....while he's wearing a very conspicuous three-piece suit. Natalie even lampshades it.
- The number of Monty Python's Flying Circus sketches using Hypocritical Humor would probably fill a page all on its own.
Dear Sir, I object strongly to the letters on your programme. They are clearly not written by the general public and are merely included for a cheap laugh. Yours sincerely etc., William Knickers.
- For example:
Mr Barnard: Look, if I argue with you, I must take up a contrary position.Man: Yes, but that's not just saying "No it isn't."Mr. Barnard: Yes it is!Man: No it isn't!
- "I! WOULD PUT A TAX! ON ALL PEOPLE! WHO'D STAND! IN WATER! WHOA!"
- This little gem from the Argument Clinic sketch.
- The Argument Clinic sketch 'ends' when a policeman named Inspector Thompson's Gazelle of the Yard arrives to arrest the whole show on three counts: Breaking the Fourth Wall, "Always saying it's so-and-so of the yard whenever the fuzz arrives" and getting out of using a Punchline by "simply ending every bleeding sketch by just having a policeman come in and... Wait a minute..." (this immediately causes him to be arrested as well).
- The Muppet Show:
Statler: What is THAT?!Waldorf: Looks like two ancient old guys sitting in a theatre box watching television!Statler: That's crazy! No one would watch junk like that!
- Rather than watch the show, Statler and Waldorf opt to watch television through a set installed in the box, and upon flipping through the channels, find...
- On a Tales from the Vet section of Muppets Tonight Dr. Van Neuter warns the guests not to overdo it on the eggnog at the Christmas party. Hilarity Ensues when he doesn't follow his own advice...
- Another episode, in a Muppet Labs segment, had Dr Bunsen Honeydew describe his assistant Beaker as a "short stubbly person". Beaker is actually taller than Bunsen.
- And then there's Miss Piggy, who will tie Kermit into a knot for even looking at another woman in one episode, then go out of her way to hit on any male guest star in the next.
- In the Murdoch Mysteries Election Day Episode, Mrs Brackenreid tells her husband exactly why he shouldn't vote for several of the candidates, and then when he suggests that leaves the suffragists, says that she doesn't understand why some women want the vote, she's quite content leaving it to him.
- In an episode of My Name Is Earl, Joy tells Randy he needs to get a job and start acting like an adult...right before turning around and yelling at her husband for stealing gummy worms from her trick-or-treat bucket.
- Kate in NCIS complained about Tony's porn obsession but looked at porn sites herself off-work and moaned about sexual objectification of women just before finding a bunch of shirtless men being photographed highly attractive. We'll put the Wet T-Shirt contest in her college days as something that occurred when drunk.
- Night Stand With Dick Dietrick, in an episode about anger:
Dick: So I was driving down the freeway the other day, and I cut somebody off, no big deal. The next thing I knew, this woman is honking and flipping me the birdie finger. If I hadn't waved my gun, who knows what she would've done! I'm tellin' ya, folks, she was crazy.
- Played straight in the Only Fools and Horses episode "Little Problems". Del is asked to make a contribution for his younger brother's wedding, and doesn't want to pay out too much money. Once he realizes that the bride's father only means a contribution of ideas and opinions, he attempts to get out of his earlier suggestion of using the old pub for the reception and back to a country club. When Alan anxiously asks, "But surely you don't like all that type of thing, do you?", Del replies, "Oh, I hate it. I hate it, Alan. I mean, those sorts of people only do things for effect," as he is served a massive cocktail, complete with fruit and umbrellas.
- Person of Interest: Root seems fond of this. When Martine shows up having changed from blonde hair to brown, Root lampshades it by commenting "I liked you better as a blonde" while trying to choke Martine to death. Three guesses who else is a natural blonde, and the first two don't count. Also, from the season two finale, when a man mentions the death of a woman a year previously (who Root had actually murdered).
Root: Such a tragedy.
(Finch gives her an Aside Glance.)
- Power Rangers S.P.D. has this in the episode "Perspective", where Commander Cruger is asking the rangers to tell him about their most recent battle due to the satellite surveillance footage being disrupted. Red Ranger Jack goes first, corrupting the story with his own vanity. Blue Ranger Sky attempts to retell the story accurately, but makes the same mistake.
Jack: Someone is a victim of their own imagination.
- In the earlier episode "Idol," Jack is left in charge of SPD while Commander Cruger is away. An alien ship enters Earth's atmosphere, and Bridge repeatedly attempts to warn Jack, who refuses to be interrupted as he is talking. When the other rangers finally get his attention and tell him about the incoming threat, he admonishes Bridge for "waiting until the last minute" to tell him.
- Psych gets about as hypocritical as is possible in the Season 4 pilot, when Shawn is discussing his powers with a Canadian police officer:
Shawn: You've seen The Mentalist, right?Rob: Yes.Shawn: It's like that.Gus: Except that guy's a fake.Shawn: Right. If I was a fake psychic, it would be eerily similar.Gus: Exactly the same.Shawn: A virtual carbon copy.
- Red Dwarf:
- More like humor based off of hypocrisy, but Rimmer finds out Lister is using illegal learning drugs to study for his Chef's Exam. Rimmer demands names, places, and dates. "Arnold Rimmer, his locker, this morning."
- In "Parallel Universe", the Red Dwarf crew wind up in a parallel universe where their counterparts are female. This episode contains a trifecta of hypocritical humour.
- Lister is turned off by his female counterpart drinking six pints of lager and belching the whole of "Yankee Doodle Dandy." Rimmer points out the irony of this situation, as Lister is a complete slob himself.
- Rimmer is disgusted by his female counterpart groping him and making sexual advances on him. Earlier in the episode, Lister was chiding Rimmer on his chauvinistic sexual advances on various women.
- Rimmer's opposite makes the aforementioned sexual advances on Rimmer. When she finds out that the two Listers got drunk enough to get in bed together, she questions why one would make love to oneself.
- Royal Canadian Air Farce:
- In the April 14 2000 episode, Vera asks her friends at the donut shop if they got their Lotto 649 tickets for the week. Charlie gets upset and says that lotteries are a tax on the stupid, people have a better chance of getting hit by a bus than winning, and lotteries are for "lazy unmotivated people who don't want to do an honest day's work." Al asks how many tickets he bought, and Charlie replies, "The usual, six."
- In the March 31 2000 episode, John Morgan is on a commuter train and two of his fellow passengers start having loud conversations on their cell phones. He picks up an imaginary phone and starts having a pretend conversation about how he's "sitting in the middle of a couple of cell phone A-holes" and how obnoxious it is to talk on a cell phone in public. After the "cell phone A-holes" get up and leave, though, Morgan takes out an actual cell phone and makes a call of his own.
- In the November 18 1999 episode, Dave the Cabbie complains to a passenger that "there are too many immigrants coming over here and living off us hardworking Canadians!" Then he mentions that he has to pick up his welfare cheque after work.
- In Samantha Who?, Samantha is relating an incident to her ex boyfriend, breaking off to ask him to 'Please put down the baloney, I'm trying to tell you how I don't need attention from men anymore!'
- Taylor Swift wrote a musical monologue when she hosted Saturday Night Live (November 7, 2009). The song consists of her talking about stuff she likes, the douchebags in her life, who she may or may not be dating now, but she ends each verse with "I'm not gonna talk about X in my monologue."
- Extremely common in Scrubs episodes. E.g.: Elliot makes a crack about Dr Cox's god complex. Dr Cox claims he has no idea what she's talking about, only to demand a random extra kiss his ring. In another episode, JD complains about a former patient following him around like she has no other friends; immediately after Turk goes to see his wife and JD says "I'll go with you." "Of course."
- In the episode "The Jimmy", Jerry asked Kramer "Do you really feel the need to use a lot of obscenities at the dentist's office?" It's interesting because Jerry once used a colorful metaphor to describe how good his yogurt was.
- In another episode, George complains about being set up on a blind date with a bald woman. George is bald.
- The first episode of season 2 of Sherlock gives us this:
Mrs. Hudson: ...Family is all we have in the end, Mycroft Holmes.Mycroft: Oh, shut up, Mrs. Hudson!Sherlock and John: [In unison, outraged] MYCROFT!Mycroft: Apologies.Mrs. Hudson: Thank you.Sherlock: [To Mrs. Hudson] Though do, in fact, shut up.
- Six Feet Under: Bordering between this and N-Word Privileges:
Gabe: (to a hipster that bumped into him) Faggot!Claire: Hey, shut up! My brother is a faggot.
- A Series of Unfortunate Events (2017):
- In the first part of The Bad Beginning, Olaf's troupe complains about the meal the children made for them while still eating it.
- From Slings and Arrows:
Anna: I was asking about pot. You know, marijuana.
Maria: I know what pot is. So, you assume I'm a pothead, as well as a lesbian? Because all stage managers are pot-smoking lesbians, right?
Maria: Well, I'm sorry to disappoint 'cha, but... I'm all out. This process has been hard on my stash, and my guy's out of town 'till Tuesday. Sorry.
- In Smallville, when Chloe notices minor earthquakes around town...
Clark: You guys talk about this?!Lana: What? It's just Chloe.
- Chloe is nice enough not to mention that Clark spent a sizable amount of time complaining to Chloe about his sex life in an earlier season.
- Done subtly and hilariously in one episode of Spin City. Having invited a gangsta rapper to the mayor's office over the matter of his lyrics, Carter says, "And remember, no gangsta stereotypes!" The rapper arrives and reaches into his coat for a business card... and Carter screams "GUN!" and dives behind a desk. Later on, when the rapper reaches into his pocket for something else, Carter does it again.
- Stargate SG-1 gives us a relatively subtle example with a Chinese ambassador attending a meeting at Stargate Command. During a recess, he disapproves of the US' secrecy concerning the Stargate, then says with absolutely no irony, "The Chinese government does not believe in keeping secrets from its people." Nobody comments on that, save for a disbelieving glance from the Russian general standing right behind him.
- Star Trek: The Original Series:
- Possibly unintentional example: In an episode Kirk is told "Your old titles mean nothing here, Captain."
- In "The Trouble With Tribbles", Spock remarks, "[The tribble's] trilling seems to have a tranquilizing effect on the human nervous system. Fortunately, of course, I am immune to its effect," while petting a tribble and acting particularly calm. Everyone turns to look to him and he surreptitiously puts it down.
- Also in "The Trouble With Tribbles", Scotty tells Chekov to calm down and not let the Klingons goad him into a fight. Very soon afterwards, he himself is goaded into starting the fight.
- Star Trek: The Next Generation:
- An unintentional one that combines with an accidental Take That, Scrappy!: In the episode "Datalore", Wesley Crusher is told by Captain Picard to shut up when Wes is trying to warn the crew that something was off about Datanote , which takes him and his mother, Beverly, off-guard. When Wes tries to protest again, this time it's Beverly who's telling him to shut up, though this was more of a fearful thing as everyone thought Wesley was being paranoid over nothing.
- In "Hollow Pursuits", Riker is irritated to encounter a rather unflattering duplicate of himself in one of Barclay's holodeck programs. Troi tells him that he's overreacting... until her duplicate appears as the gauzy-robe-clad "Goddess of Empathy".
- In "Cost of Living", Deanna suggests that Worf and Alexander draw up a contract that clearly defines their rights and responsibilities.
Deanna: What would you like your father to promise, Alexander?
Alexander: No yelling.
Worf: I DO NOT ... I do not yell.
Deanna: Well, then you should have no trouble with that part.
- And then she does it herself, explaining to Alexander that eventually, most children learn to appreciate their parents, only for Riker to inform her Lwaxana's on board. She collapses in her chair and mutters "On the other hand..."
- Star Trek: Enterprise Malcolm Reed to Trip Tucker in 'Shuttlepod One':
- Malcolm:You know, I'm not a doctor, but I'm pretty sure you use up a lot more oxygen WHEN YOU SHOUT LIKE THAT!"
- Strangers with Candy: "There's only one thing I hate more than racists, and that's spics!"
- This exchange from the Supernatural episode "Heaven and Hell":
Uriel (an angel): How dare you come in this room... you pussing sore.Alastair (a demon): Namecalling. That hurt my feelings... you sanctimonious fanatical prick.
- From The Thick of It:
Malcolm: Oh, and that's an incredibly homophobic headline you're running with, you massive poof.
- Malcolm again, this time in a subversion, talking to Oliver:
Malcolm: Don't you EVER call me a bully!(beat)Malcolm: I'm so much worse than that.
- Malcolm again, this time in a subversion, talking to Oliver:
- The Thin Blue Line:
- At one point, Grim is needling Raymond about his divorce and slightly distant relationship with his son, whom Raymond is worried is turning a bit wild. Grim makes a lot of hay about how he's a devoted family man who is always there for his sons. On an unrelated matter, guess who's loutish son just got arrested for disturbing the peace...? Raymond's son, incidentally, turns out to be studying to try and get into university; turns out Raymond's worries were a bit hyperactive anyway.
- "Ism Ism Ism" has Grim arguing against "weird customs and funny clothes" in the police force, then turns around and tries to demonstrate his initiation ceremony for the Todgers.
- On Top Gear, after their homebuilt electric car has received a scathing review from Autocar magazine, the three presenters complain that the critics were too hard on their vehicle and that it will hurt their sales... and what do people who review cars for a living know, anyway?
- Victorious: In Wi-Fi in the Sky, when Trina asks the dad to don't let his son kick her seat, but he doesn't care.
- Trina: Some people are so rude!Tori: [Picks up the trash Trina put on her table some moments ago] I know!
- The Weird Al Show episode 11, in reference to another in-universe show host parodying him:
Al: How awful! How heartless! How could anyone sink so low as to do a PARODY of another human being??
- The West Wing
Leo: This is the week when pull this party together and show the American people we can lead with integrity and maturity. Okay, the speaking order. Rock, Paper, Scissors on three.
- They sometimes Played for Laughs the fact that much of the US population engages in this. At one point they quoted two opinion polls that demonstrated at least 14% of Americans think contributions to the UN are too high, and at the same time think it shouldn't be cut.note
- Then there's the sixth season's Democratic convention negotiations.
- From What I Like About You:
Val: I can be spontaneous. Right now I'm going to come up with a list of spontaneous things to do. I'm gonna need some graph paper.
- Will & Grace:
Karen: Ok, ok, it's over. Now, listen to me. (gets out a pill) The first thing you have to do is admit that you have a problem. (swirls the pill in her martini) Because if you can't even recognize the signs... (drops the wet pill into her mouth) Then you are really in sorry shape. (washes down the pill)Oh, mmm! (to the martini glass) Why are you so good to me?
- One episode has Jack develop an addiction to coffee while dating someone from a coffeehouse, and then ends up trying to squeeze coffee out of the used filters from a coffee-maker after said boyfriend quits. Karen then proceeds to lecture him about dealing with the problem... while washing down a pill with a martini.
- Also, when discussing Karen dumping Jack Donaghy:
Karen: Well, you know me. If there's one thing I cannot do, it is hurt another person's feelings.Jack: That is so true, Karen. You do have a kind heart.Karen: (pause) I'm sorry, honey. I don't what it is, but your faggy little voice is just going right through me today.
- And then when discussing the incompetent Middle Eastern woman Grace has hired:
Grace: You know what? You're never going to understand. I mean, the fact is, I'm tolerant. And you are...well, maybe a little bit racist.Karen: How dare you call me a racist! A homophobe? Maybe. Distrustful of Spaniards? Who isn't? But nobody calls me a racist. And you can ask anyone I own.
- Workaholics has given several examples, usually from the comically unaware Adam, who often subverts his own brief attempts at being decent and kind.
- Adam: If you donít want to date me thatís fine Ė I get that. But youíre wrong and I hate you.Adam: Just because you don't like something, doesn't mean that its bad. Also, fuck you, everything you like sucks.Adam: (when Ders is riding on a mini-carousel in a drunken funk over turning 25) This is the saddest thing I've ever seen dude, you're not a child! (to Blake) Yo, do you have some more tokens, I wanna play Pop-Shot. I've got like the fourth highest score, I'm not gonna give up I'm not a quitter.
- From Yes, Minister: "In politics you have to learn to say things with tact and finesse, you berk."
- Rick from The Young Ones, at the top of his lungs: "I AM NOT GETTING AGGRESSIVE!!!!"
- Kathy Griffin, describing how disappointed her Catholic mother was with her Emmy award speech: "Kathleen, why'd ya have ta tell Jesus to suck it, gawddamnit? I can't even show my face at church, fer Christ's sake! Damn, Kathleen, don't be so rude!"
- As the late, great, George Carlin put it, "So I say live and let live. That's my motto: Live and let live. Anyone who can't go along with that, take 'em outside and shoot the motherfucker. It's a simple philosophy, but it's always worked in our family."
- One of Kenny Everett's running characters was 'Mr Angry of Mayfair', a city gent who would usefully appear to complain about the filth on TV, only to reveal at the end that he was dressed in women's underwear.
- Movie critic Richard Roeper, jokingly. Watch out for the end of his The Greatest Movie Ever Sold review, right after saying "I mean, come on, some of us still have our integrity!"
- In the first time presenting a show on commericial television Andrew Denton pretends to ring up the head of the network to complain about how often the ad breaks are. He was formerly on the Australian government-run ABC which has no ad breaks. We only hear his part of the conversion and it ends like this:
Andrew Denton: They make how much money?
<turns to camera> And we'll be back after these important messages.