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This thread is for tropers who have trouble with English and would like some help with the crazy grammar of this crazy language.

Write down what you wish to edit on the wiki. If you have been suspended from editing, another troper might be kind enough to edit for you after your suggestions have been corrected.

The thread is for help and feedback on your own suggested edits.

If you want help correcting other people's edits (e.g., if you find a page which seems to have grammar problems but want a second opinion, or you don't feel able to fix it by yourself) then that's off-topic here, but we have a separate Grammar Police cleanup thread that can provide assistance.

Edited by Mrph1 on Nov 16th 2023 at 5:37:57 PM

MGD107 Since: Feb, 2015
MGD107 Since: Feb, 2015
#2852: Jul 6th 2016 at 3:11:17 AM

Okay here's two edits I would like to add to Get Smart:

  • Darker and Edgier: One particular episode that stands out is “Island of the Darned”, while itself a spoof of The Most Dangerous Game it plays the human hunting elements surprisingly straight. Despite possessing a few jokes (especially at the beginning) the majority of the episode involves Max and 99 on the run through the jungle from a Sociopathic hunter, who wants to kill them and mount their heads on his wall, with the danger they are in played one hundred percent straight. To stay alive they’re forced to resort to several noticeably more brutal and dirty tactics than normal (such building a concealed spike pit to skewer one of the hunters heavies) which at the end leads to 99 wondering if they’re really any better than the people they fight (Max disagrees).

  • Knight of Cerebus: Hans Hunter from “Island of the Darned” for a parody of an Egomaniac Hunter is a surprisingly dark villain especially for this series. A Sociopathic mad man with a passion for hunting people he’s introduced chasing another agent like an animal, before killingly the helpless man. He then has his body stuffed and sent back to CONTROL. Capturing Max and 99, he reveals he plans to kill Max and mount his head on the wall with his other hunting trophies. The majority of the episode involves Max and 99 on the run from this deranged lunatic, and being forced to use several surprisingly dirty tactics to survive. Unlike the majority of this shows villains Hans never gets a single humorous moment and is played almost completely straight.

edited 6th Jul '16 3:14:15 AM by MGD107

war877 Grr... <3 from Untamed Wilds Since: Dec, 2015 Relationship Status: Having tea with Cthulhu
Grr... <3
#2853: Jul 6th 2016 at 6:33:56 PM

...a sociopathic hunter... normal,  ( such as building a... hunter's heavies, which... they fight.  ( Max disagrees ) .

Knight of Cerebus: Hans Hunter from “Island of the Darned” is, for a parody of an Egomaniac Hunter, is a surprisingly dark villain especially for this series... hunting people, he’s introduced... before killingly the helpless man...of this show's villains, Hans never...

The first sentence in the Knight of Cerebus example has an alternate correction if you meant as an Egomaniac Hunter instead of for an Egomaniac Hunter.

MGD107 Since: Feb, 2015
#2854: Jul 7th 2016 at 12:57:51 AM

Thank you, and no I did mean ...for a parody of an Egomaniac hunter... but I understand that was a bit ambiguous.

Here is the corrected version, any more errors?

  • Darker and Edgier: One particular episode that stands out is “Island of the Darned” while itself a spoof of The Most Dangerous Game it plays the human hunting elements surprisingly straight. Despite possessing a few jokes (especially at the beginning) the majority of the episode involves Max and 99 on the run through the jungle from a sociopathic hunter, who wants to kill them and mount their heads on his wall, with the danger they are in played one hundred percent straight. To stay alive they’re forced to resort to several noticeably more brutal and dirty tactics than normal, such as building a concealed spike pit to skewer one of the hunter’s heavies, which at the end leads to 99 wondering if they’re really any better than the people they fight. Max disagrees.

  • Knight of Cerebus: Hans Hunter from “Island of the Darned” is, for a parody of an Egomaniac Hunter, a surprisingly dark villain especially for this series. A Sociopathic mad man with a passion for hunting people, he’s introduced chasing another agent like an animal, before killing the helpless man. He then has his body stuffed and sent back to CONTROL. Capturing Max and 99, he reveals he plans to kill Max and mount his head on the wall with his other hunting trophies. The majority of the episode involves Max and 99 on the run from this deranged lunatic, and being forced to use several surprisingly dirty tactics to survive. Unlike the majority of this show’s villains Hans, never gets a single humorous moment and is played almost completely straight.

edited 7th Jul '16 1:00:43 AM by MGD107

war877 Grr... <3 from Untamed Wilds Since: Dec, 2015 Relationship Status: Having tea with Cthulhu
Grr... <3
#2855: Jul 7th 2016 at 1:14:42 AM

You put the last comma after Hans instead of before. Commas separate clauses, and Hans belongs to the clause after the comma.

MGD107 Since: Feb, 2015
#2856: Jul 7th 2016 at 12:14:21 PM

Right sorry, fixed that. Still if that's everything I'll add them.

andrew369 Since: Apr, 2012
#2857: Jul 12th 2016 at 6:21:13 PM

[up][up] Hey war877. Sorry that I didn't response early since I was on holiday but here's the corrected version:

I have another tropes to add in for the Awesome moments in the Overlord Light Novel:

  • In Volume 5, when a knight by the name of Climb happens to see Sebas' powers after Sebas rescued a boy from being beaten up, he decides to ask Sebas to teach him to be strong. Due to a lack of time, Sebas decides to test him by attacking Climb with one punch and a very powerful bloodlust. At first Climb couldn't move a step fearing of death. However when Climb thinks of Princess Renner, Climb manages to move and evade Sebas' punch, impressing Sebas in the process. That kid's will is very strong.
  • In Volume 6, The entire battle between Sebas and members of the Six Arms, except Succulent, who was taken out by Climb and a nameless rogue. Lets just say Sebas manages to Curb Stomp all 5 members with a single hit! They should have listened to his warning:
    Sebas: [To the 4 members of the Six Arms] Don't try to annoy me by attacking me one at a time. If all of you come at once, you might last 10 seconds. [He manages to take them out in just 20 seconds.]

edited 14th Jul '16 6:31:10 PM by andrew369

war877 Grr... <3 from Untamed Wilds Since: Dec, 2015 Relationship Status: Having tea with Cthulhu
Grr... <3
#2858: Jul 13th 2016 at 6:10:58 AM

This thread is for you. Take as many vacations as you want.

At first Climb couldn't move a step fearing of death, even Brain Unglaus who happens to be watching their training.

I don't know how I missed this. even Brian Unglaus was what?

I uploaded the other, with the corrections you missed and one additional correction. Actions is quotes must be in italics, and the spoiler left one square bracket uncovered.

In the future, numbers smaller than thirteen should usually be written as words. But this is a minor error.

edited 13th Jul '16 6:17:05 AM by war877

andrew369 Since: Apr, 2012
#2859: Jul 13th 2016 at 6:44:11 PM

[up]

Edited and corrected. Brain Unglaus is actually a famous swordsman.

But there is one question I'm not so clear about :

"In the future, numbers smaller than thirteen should usually be written as words"

Care to clarify on this part?

edited 13th Jul '16 9:56:42 PM by andrew369

war877 Grr... <3 from Untamed Wilds Since: Dec, 2015 Relationship Status: Having tea with Cthulhu
Grr... <3
#2860: Jul 14th 2016 at 12:21:32 AM

[up]That correction is not right. I do not need to know what Brian is, I need to know what that clause is saying. What is he doing?

There are lots of rules about numbers, and it varies by medium and context. Here are some rules of thumb.

"Five hundred and sixty three dollars," said John.

The amount John asked for was $563.

John purchased 53 tomatoes.

John purchased fifty tomatoes.

John purchased three tomatoes.

Numbers that are part of a name are untouchable. Volume 6, Nineteen Eighty Four.

edited 14th Jul '16 12:22:44 AM by war877

andrew369 Since: Apr, 2012
#2861: Jul 14th 2016 at 6:31:46 PM

[up]

Corrected it again only removed the Brain part.

war877 Grr... <3 from Untamed Wilds Since: Dec, 2015 Relationship Status: Having tea with Cthulhu
Grr... <3
MGD107 Since: Feb, 2015
#2863: Jul 15th 2016 at 7:33:05 AM

Okay here are several edits I would like to add to Grimm page.

Volcanalis

  • Dishing Out Dirt: Has the power to navigate underground, move through earth as if it was air, and able to trigger earthquakes and volcanic eruption if suitably enraged.
  • Greed: Volcanalis was renowned for his incredible greed, anyone who stole the rocks from the Volcano’s base (which it considered its property) it would hunt them down and kill them. If enough are taken it would cause the Volcano to erupt, killing everyone.
  • Historical Rap Sheet: Was responsible for Mount Vesuvius erupting and the destruction of Pompeii.
  • Implacable Man: Due its nature its near impossible to stop, anything that gets in its way will just burn, bullets just melt upon impact, likewise it can travel through sheer rock with ease.
  • Logical Weakness: As a creature made of magma it is vulnerable to extreme cold.
  • Scarily Competent Tracker: It doesn’t matter where you take the rocks, it will find you. Volcanalis has a connection to the earth that no one can truly explain, but it allows it to always find what it considers its.

Blutbaden

  • The Dreaded: As one of the most dangerous of all Wesen Blutbad are feared by multiple other wesen, and themselves only fear the strongest and most dangerous.
  • Noble Wolf / Savage Wolf: As a race on a whole they are renowned for both their brutality and violent nature, especially towards their prey. As well as their loyalty and devotion to those they consider friend. The outright morality thus differs a lot depending on the individual Blutbad.

Cracher-Mortel

  • Breath Weapon: Their spit which is a poison that causes a death-like trance in its victims for a few days before they regain consciousness. Afterwards they go through four stages, starting with uncontrollable rage, then being feral but completely under the control of a Carcher-Mortel that infected them, before finally dying.
  • Wicked Cultured: As a race they have a reputation for wearing smart clothes such as old fashioned suits and top hats.

Daemonfuer

  • Dragon Hoard: A race of treasure mongers, in the olden days they used to steal gold and silver, however in the present several have adapted their tastes to a love of copper.

Genio innocuo

  • Too Clever by Half: As a race renowned for their intelligence they often fall into this, creating situations they are unable to deal with.

Hexenbiests:

  • [[Flanderisation]]: In the first season Hexenbiests power originally leaned more towards Maybe Magic, Maybe Mundane with their potions that could cause bizarre but still not to extreme effects. Later seasons continued to up their magical potential, to the point we’ve seen Hexenbiests with the power to shapeshift, manipulate time, and even alter reality (to an extent). Justified as the show’s made it very clear all Hexenbiest’s have different levels of power, with the more magical ones being acknowledged inverse as very power and introduced later on.
  • It's All About Me: A racial trait. On a whole Hexenbiest are notoriously egocentric and rarely consider how their actions affect others. They are likewise prone to excessive vanity, to the point of putting leeches on their face to make their skin look paler.
  • Squishy Wizard: Downplayed, while possessing enhanced strength and durability (not to Grimm levels) even the most powerful Hexenbiest can die as easy as a human from a blade or a bullet.

Lebensauger

  • Blood Lust: Like actual Leeches they can and do drink human blood, however due to their size this means killing the person, as such some use it as a method of murder.

Mauvais Dentes

  • The Dreaded: One of the most feared of all wesen, due to their reputation of wiping out entire villages.
  • To Serve Man: As well as slaughtering they also eat people, or rather parts of them.

Phansigar

Wildermann

  • Beware of the Nice Ones: As a race they are commonly associated with tranquillity and gentleness. However they are physically stronger than the majority of Wesen, including Blutbaden, able to casually rip people apart. As such if they ever go ape, run!

Ziegevolk

  • Charm Person: The majority of Ziegevolk (commonly known as “breeders”) count as this, as their pheromone abilities merely make the other person more inclined to agree with them and make themselves appear more charismatic and attractive, it doesn’t allow them to force people to do their will. Unfortunately some have further powers.
  • Compelling Voice: Some Ziegevolk (commonly known as “headers”) possess the ability to enhance their pheromone powers by devouring a certain species of toad. In this case they can outright control and force their victims to obey their every word. The most powerful can have this bordering on outright brainwashing and can even rewrite memories.
  • Dirty Coward: As a race they will pick running over fighting every day.
  • Fragile Speedster: Possess goat like abilities to easily climb uneven terrain, as well as surprising speed and agility. However they are no more durable than normal humans, this coupled with their cowardliness means they normally won’t stand and fight.
  • Serial Rapist: Ziegevolk who do possess greater powers commonly misuse them to rape large numbers of women, thus the reason they are known as “herders” in the wesen community.

edited 15th Jul '16 7:42:35 AM by MGD107

war877 Grr... <3 from Untamed Wilds Since: Dec, 2015 Relationship Status: Having tea with Cthulhu
Grr... <3
#2864: Jul 15th 2016 at 12:29:40 PM

[up] I looked at the first half.

Volcanalis

  • Dishing Out Dirt: Has the power to navigate underground, move through earth as if it was were air, and is able to trigger earthquakes and volcanic eruption if suitably enraged.
  • Greed: Volcanalis was renowned for his incredible greed , : anyone who stole the rocks from the Volcano’s base,  ( which it considered its property ) , it would hunt them down and kill them. If enough are taken it would cause the Volcano to erupt, killing everyone.
  • Implacable Man: Due its nature its it's near impossible to stop , : anything that gets in its way will just burn, bullets just melt upon impact, likewise and it can travel through sheer rock with ease.
  • Logical Weakness: As a creature made of magma, it is vulnerable to extreme cold.

Blutbaden

  • The Dreaded: As one of the most dangerous of all Wesen, Blutbad are feared by multiple other wesen, and themselves only fear the strongest and most dangerous.
  • Noble Wolf / Savage Wolf: As a race on a whole they are renowned for both their brutality and violent nature, especially towards their prey. As well as And also for their loyalty and devotion to those they consider friend. The outright morality thus differs a lot depending on the individual Blutbad.

NOTE: from Administrivia.How To Write An Example: Do Not Add Multiple Tropes With A Slash/Adding Multiple Tropes With A Slash Is Bad: See what we did there? Don't do that either. It's lazy, causes duplicate examples to pop up when other tropers notice that a given trope is missing from its proper alphabetical position, not realizing it's slashed with another trope, creates confusion when there are multiple examples (which examples apply to which trope?), and overall just looks bad. If two or more tropes apply to a contextual description, put each trope separately in its correct place.

Cracher-Mortel

  • Breath Weapon: Their spit which is a poison that causes a death-like trance in its victims for a few days before they regain consciousness. Afterwards, they go through four stages, starting with uncontrollable rage, then being feral but completely under the control of a Carcher-Mortel that infected them, before finally dying.

Daemonfuer

  • Dragon Hoard: A race of treasure mongers, in the olden days they used to steal gold and silver , . However, in the present, several have adapted their tastes to a love of copper.

I stopped at Hexenbiests for today.

PeachySqueezy being me is suffering... from nowhere and everywhere. Since: Jul, 2016 Relationship Status: What is this thing you call love?
being me is suffering...
#2865: Jul 15th 2016 at 8:39:13 PM

Hey people! I want to make some changes to my own troper page. Which sentence do you think sounds better?

"Since I'm a straight A Student, this is my standard reaction whenever I get grades lower than 90 or 85%."

or

"Since I'm a straight A Student, this is my standard reaction whenever I get lower grades than 90 or 85%."

Both sound OK to me, and according to The Other Wiki, both ways are possible. However, my grammar sense is tingling for some reason. Notice I'm not a native speaker.

I'm sorry if this is too much of a hindrance.

I'm lonely... would you talk to me on Discord? MidoriPeach<3#9584
Arivne Since: Jan, 2001
#2866: Jul 16th 2016 at 1:50:40 AM

^

The first sentence (grades lower than) is better English (less confusing) than the second one.

Also, the word "Student" shouldn't be capitalized (i.e. it should be "student").

A couple of changes that aren't strictly required but that you might want to consider:

  • I checked using Google and many of the examples of "straight A student" had a dash between "straight" and "A", like this: "straight-A student".
  • I would put a % sign after the 90 (i.e. 90%).

edited 16th Jul '16 1:59:55 AM by Arivne

PeachySqueezy being me is suffering... from nowhere and everywhere. Since: Jul, 2016 Relationship Status: What is this thing you call love?
being me is suffering...
#2867: Jul 16th 2016 at 6:42:29 AM

Alright, thanks for your help!

One more question though. Why do you think the second sentence is slightly more confusing? I find it kind of weird as well, but I don't seem to be able to tell why.

edited 16th Jul '16 6:42:59 AM by PeachySqueezy

I'm lonely... would you talk to me on Discord? MidoriPeach<3#9584
war877 Grr... <3 from Untamed Wilds Since: Dec, 2015 Relationship Status: Having tea with Cthulhu
Grr... <3
#2868: Jul 16th 2016 at 6:48:38 AM

-[snip]- incorrect and misses the point.

It took me a while but I got there: "lower than 90% or 85%" is an adjective phrase. It is being used attributively in both cases, to modify the noun grades. But it is being split by the noun it modifies in the second. Which is unusual. Splitting phrases has a way of making them confusing.

edited 16th Jul '16 7:19:53 AM by war877

PeachySqueezy being me is suffering... from nowhere and everywhere. Since: Jul, 2016 Relationship Status: What is this thing you call love?
being me is suffering...
#2869: Jul 16th 2016 at 7:23:39 AM

I see now. You've enlightened me!

It's very nice to know there's a thread fully dedicated to helping ESL speakers with English!

edited 16th Jul '16 7:29:58 AM by PeachySqueezy

I'm lonely... would you talk to me on Discord? MidoriPeach<3#9584
war877 Grr... <3 from Untamed Wilds Since: Dec, 2015 Relationship Status: Having tea with Cthulhu
Grr... <3
#2870: Jul 16th 2016 at 5:39:38 PM

@MDG107, post #2863 Here is the second half.

Hexenbiests:

  • {{Flanderisation}}: In the first season Hexenbiest power originally leaned more towards Maybe Magic, Maybe Mundane with their potions that could cause bizarre but still not too extreme effects. Later seasons continued to up their magical potential, to the point where we’ve seen Hexenbiests with the power to shapeshift, manipulate time, and even alter reality (to an extent). Justified as the show’s made it very clear all Hexenbiest’s Hexenbiests have different levels of power, with the more magical ones being acknowledged inverse as very powerful and introduced later on.
  • It's All About Me: A racial trait. On a whole Hexenbiests are notoriously egocentric and rarely consider how their actions affect others. They are likewise prone to excessive vanity, to the point of putting leeches on their face to make their skin look paler.
  • Squishy Wizard: Downplayed , . While possessing enhanced strength and durability (not to Grimm levels), but not to Grimm levels, even the most powerful Hexenbiests can die as easy as a human from a blade or a bullet.

Lebensauger

  • Blood Lust: Like actual Leeches they can and do drink human blood , however. Due to their size this means killing the person will kill the victim , . As such some use it as a method of murder.

Mauvais Dentes

  • To Serve Man: As well as slaughtering, they also eat people, or rather parts of them.

Phansigar

  • Reptiles Are Abhorrent: They are komodo dragon like wesen who commonly practice Human Sacrifice.

Wildermann

  • Beware of the Nice Ones: As a race they are commonly associated with tranquillity and gentleness. However, they are physically stronger than the majority of Wesen, including Blutbaden, and are able to casually rip people apart. As such, if they ever go ape, run!

Ziegevolk

  • Charm Person: The majority of Ziegevolk,  ( those commonly known as “breeders”, count as this, as their pheromone abilities merely make the other person more inclined to agree with them and make themselves appear more charismatic and attractive , . It doesn’t allow them to force people to do their will. Unfortunately, some have further powers.
  • Compelling Voice: Some Ziegevolk,  ( those commonly known as “headers”, possess the ability to enhance their pheromone powers by devouring a certain species of toad. In this case they can outright control and force their victims to obey their every word. The most powerful can have this bordering on outright brainwashing and can even rewrite memories.
  • Fragile Speedster: They possess goat like abilities to easily climb uneven terrain, as well as surprising speed and agility. However, they are no more durable than normal humans , . This, coupled with their cowardliness means they normally won’t stand and fight.

Did you mean "Herders"?


Questions and comments always appreciated.

edited 16th Jul '16 5:47:02 PM by war877

MGD107 Since: Feb, 2015
#2871: Jul 17th 2016 at 5:20:11 AM

Okay, first sorry that it was so long, second I implimented all your changes. I also extended the Noble Wolf Savage Wolf parts to be their own entries, and rewrote a few bits cause honestly I don't know what I was thinking when I first wrote that. Unfortunately I also added two knew enties to the Mauvais Dentes and the Phansigar respectively, sorry.

So here it is again, any more/new errors:

Volcanalis

  • Dishing Out Dirt: Has the power to navigate underground, move through earth as if it were air, and is able to trigger earthquakes and volcanic eruption if suitably enraged.
  • Greed: Volcanalis was renowned for his incredible greed: anyone who took the rocks from the Volcano’s base, which it considered its property, it would hunt them down and kill them. If enough are taken it would cause the Volcano to erupt, killing everyone.
  • Historical Rap Sheet: Was responsible for Mount Vesuvius erupting and the destruction of Pompeii.
  • Implacable Man: Due it’s nature its near impossible to stop, anything that gets in its way will just burn, bullets just melt upon impact, and it can travel through sheer rock with ease.
  • Logical Weakness: As a creature made of magma, it is vulnerable to extreme cold.
  • Scarily Competent Tracker: It doesn’t matter where you take the rocks, it will find you. Volcanalis has a connection to the earth that no one can truly explain, but it allows it to always find what it considers its.

Blutbaden

  • The Dreaded: As one of the most dangerous of all Wesen, Blutbad are feared by multiple other wesen, and themselves only fear the strongest and most dangerous.
  • Noble Wolf: As a race on a whole they are renowned for their loyalty and devotion to those they consider friend. They will commonly join them even against near impossible threats, and will always avenge the deaths of their kin. However, their outright morality depends on the individual Blutbad. See Savage Wolf.
  • Savage Wolf: As a race they are infamous for their brutality and violent nature, especially towards their prey. It is not uncommon for them to dismember their victims while their still alive, and some have been known to murder weaker wesen (especially Bauerschwein) simply for sport. However, their outright morality depends on the individual Blutbad. See Noble Wolf.

Cracher-Mortel

  • Breath Weapon: Their spit which is a poison that causes a death-like trance in its victims for a few days before they regain consciousness. Afterwards, they go through four stages, starting with uncontrollable rage, then being feral but completely under the control of a Carcher-Mortel that infected them, before finally dying.
  • Wicked Cultured: As a race they have a reputation for wearing smart clothes such as old fashioned suits and top hats.

Daemonfuer

  • Dragon Hoard: A race of treasure mongers, in the olden days they used to steal gold and silver. However in the present several have adapted their tastes to a love of copper.

Genio innocuo

  • Too Clever by Half: As a race renowned for their intelligence they often fall into this, creating situations they are unable to deal with.

Hexenbiests:

  • Flanderisation: In the first season Hexenbiest power originally leaned more towards Maybe Magic, Maybe Mundane with their potions that could cause bizarre but still not too extreme effects. Later seasons continued to up their magical potential, to the point where we’ve seen Hexenbiests with the power to shapeshift, manipulate time, and even alter reality (to an extent). Justified as the show’s made it very clear all Hexenbiests have different levels of power, with the more magical ones being acknowledged in verse as very powerful and introduced later on.
  • It's All About Me: A racial trait. On a whole Hexenbiests are notoriously egocentric and rarely consider how their actions affect others. They are likewise prone to excessive vanity, to the point of putting leeches on their face to make their skin look paler.
  • Squishy Wizard: Downplayed. While possessing enhanced strength and durability but not to Grimm levels, even the most powerful Hexenbiests can die as easy as a human from a blade or a bullet.

Lebensauger

  • Blood Lust: Like actual leeches they can and do drink human blood. Due to their size this will kill the victim. As such some use it as a method of murder.

Mauvais Dentes

  • The Dreaded: One of the most feared of all wesen, due to their reputation of wiping out entire villages.
  • Person of Mass Destruction: For centuries past, individual Mauvais Dentes would wipe out entire villages killing hundreds of people. In the present day only the Royal families have the power to control one.
  • To Serve Man: As well as slaughtering, they also eat people, or rather parts of them.

Phansigar

Wildermann

  • Beware of the Nice Ones: As a race they are commonly associated with tranquillity and gentleness. However, they are physically stronger than the majority of Wesen, including Blutbaden, and are able to casually rip people apart. If enraged to an uncontrollable degree, they can be extremely dangerous.

Ziegevolk

  • Charm Person: The majority of Ziegevolk, those commonly known as “breeders”, count as this, as their pheromone abilities merely make the other person more inclined to agree with them and make themselves appear more charismatic and attractive. It doesn’t allow them to force people to do their will. Unfortunately, some have further powers.
  • Compelling Voice: Some Ziegevolk, commonly known as “herders”, possess the ability to enhance their pheromone powers by devouring a certain species of toad. In this case they can outright control and force their victims to obey their every word. The most powerful can have this bordering on outright brainwashing and can even rewrite memories.
  • Dirty Coward: As a race they will pick running over fighting every day.
  • Fragile Speedster: They possess goat like abilities to easily climb uneven terrain, as well as surprising speed and agility. However, they are no more durable than normal humans. This coupled with their cowardliness means they normally won’t stand and fight.
  • Serial Rapist: Ziegevolk who do possess greater powers commonly misuse them to rape large numbers of women, thus the reason they are known as “herders” in the wesen community.

edited 17th Jul '16 6:59:00 AM by MGD107

war877 Grr... <3 from Untamed Wilds Since: Dec, 2015 Relationship Status: Having tea with Cthulhu
Grr... <3
#2872: Jul 17th 2016 at 12:04:59 PM

[up]I found a few. Several I had missed the first time. I must have been asleep.

Volcanalis

  • Dishing Out Dirt: Has the power to navigate underground, move through earth as if it were air, and is able to trigger earthquakes and volcanic eruptions if suitably enraged.
  • Greed: Volcanalis was renowned for his incredible greed: anyone who took the rocks from the Volcano’s base, which it considered its property, it would hunt them down and kill them. If enough are were taken, it would cause the Volcano to erupt, killing everyone.
  • Implacable Man: Due to it’s nature its near impossible to stop, anything that gets in its way will just burn, bullets just melt upon impact, and it can travel through sheer rock with ease.

You got the green correction backwards. "its" is the possessive form. Think "Tom's". "It's" is a contraction. Read "it is".

Blutbaden

  • Savage Wolf: As a race they are infamous for their brutality and violent nature, especially towards their prey. It is not uncommon for them to dismember their victims while their they're still alive, and some have been known to murder weaker wesen (especially Bauerschwein) simply for sport. However, their outright morality depends on the individual Blutbad. See Noble Wolf.

Daemonfuer

  • Dragon Hoard: A race of treasure mongers, in the olden days they used to steal gold and silver. However, in the present, several have adapted their tastes to a love of copper.

You may have noticed that I add a comma after all your uses of the word "However". There are very few cases where the word however is not followed by a comma.

Hexenbiests:

  • Squishy Wizard: Downplayed. While possessing enhanced strength and durability, although not to Grimm levels, even the most powerful Hexenbiests can die as easily as a human from a blade or a bullet.

I think although works better here. I would also consider rewriting this one further.

Mauvais Dentes

  • The Dreaded: One of the most feared of all wesen, due to their reputation of for wiping out entire villages.
  • Person of Mass Destruction: For In centuries past, individual Mauvais Dentes would wipe out entire villages killing hundreds of people. In the present day only the Royal families have the power to control one.

You may have meant "for centuries past". What that means is during the period between a few centuries ago and now. "In centuries past" means before the current century.

Ziegevolk

  • Compelling Voice: Some Ziegevolk, those commonly known as “herders”, possess the ability to enhance their pheromone powers by devouring a certain species of toad...

Tomodachi Now a lurker. See you at the forums. Since: Aug, 2012 Relationship Status: Yes, I'm alone, but I'm alone and free
Now a lurker. See you at the forums.
#2873: Jul 17th 2016 at 4:07:48 PM

I made a mistake. I was so happy for finally being able to edit again, that I forgot to put my examples here.

I wrote this on the Memetic Loser page:

"Chiaotzu. The character was Out of Focus for most of the manga, and his most defining characteristic is being Tien friend. Even when he was taken out during the tournament, none of the gang went to visit him to the hospital, unlike Krillin. His only well know moment is making a Stupid Sacrifice that didn't even scratch Nappa. He doesn't even have a line of dialogue with Goku in all of the manga, and like Launch, Toriyama seems to have forgot about him."

Is this alright? I want to fix any problem! I don't want to repeat the mistake of writing without checking again!

edited 17th Jul '16 4:12:01 PM by Tomodachi

To win, you need to adapt, and to adapt, you need to be able to laugh away all the restraints. Everything holding you back.
MGD107 Since: Feb, 2015
#2874: Jul 18th 2016 at 12:34:53 AM

Okay I implemented all your changes, and slightly rewrote that part you thought I should. Also about However and comma's, thank you I'll try to remember that from now on.

So here it is, hopefully for a final time. Anymore corrections?

Volcanalis

  • Dishing Out Dirt: Has the power to navigate underground, move through earth as if it were air, and is able to trigger earthquakes and volcanic eruptions if suitably enraged.
  • Greed: Volcanalis was renowned for its incredible greed: anyone who took the rocks from the Volcano’s base, which it considered its property, it would hunt down and kill. If enough were taken, it would cause the Volcano to erupt, killing everyone.
  • Historical Rap Sheet: Was responsible for Mount Vesuvius erupting and the destruction of Pompeii.
  • Implacable Man: Due to its nature it’s near impossible to stop, anything that gets in its way will just burn, bullets just melt upon impact, and it can travel through sheer rock with ease.
  • Logical Weakness: As a creature made of magma, it is vulnerable to extreme cold.
  • Scarily Competent Tracker: It doesn’t matter where you take the rocks, it will find you. Volcanalis has a connection to the earth that no one can truly explain, but it allows it to always find what it considers its.

Blutbaden

  • The Dreaded: As one of the most dangerous of all Wesen, Blutbad are feared by multiple other wesen, and themselves only fear the strongest and most dangerous.
  • Noble Wolf: As a race on a whole they are renowned for their loyalty and devotion to those they consider friend. They will commonly join them even against near impossible threats, and will always avenge the deaths of their kin. However, their outright morality depends on the individual Blutbad. See Savage Wolf.
  • Savage Wolf: As a race they are infamous for their brutality and violent nature, especially towards their prey. It is not uncommon for them to dismember their victims while they’re still alive, and some have been known to murder weaker wesen (especially Bauerschwein) simply for sport. However, their outright morality depends on the individual Blutbad. See Noble Wolf.

Cracher-Mortel

  • Breath Weapon: Their spit which is a poison that causes a death-like trance in its victims for a few days before they regain consciousness. Afterwards, they go through four stages, starting with uncontrollable rage, then being feral but completely under the control of a Carcher-Mortel that infected them, before finally dying.
  • Wicked Cultured: As a race they have a reputation for wearing smart clothes such as old fashioned suits and top hats.

Daemonfuer

  • Dragon Hoard: A race of treasure mongers, in the olden days they used to steal gold and silver. However, in the present, several have adapted their tastes to a love of copper.

Genio innocuo

  • Too Clever by Half: As a race renowned for their intelligence they often fall into this, creating situations they are unable to deal with.

Hexenbiests:

  • Flanderisation: In the first season Hexenbiest power originally leaned more towards Maybe Magic, Maybe Mundane with their potions that could cause bizarre but still not too extreme effects. Later seasons continued to up their magical potential, to the point where we’ve seen Hexenbiests with the power to shapeshift, manipulate time, and even alter reality (to an extent). Justified as the show’s made it very clear all Hexenbiests have different levels of power, with the more magical ones being acknowledged in verse as very powerful and introduced later on.
  • It's All About Me: A racial trait. On a whole Hexenbiests are notoriously egocentric and rarely consider how their actions affect others. They are likewise prone to excessive vanity, to the point of putting leeches on their face to make their skin look paler.
  • Squishy Wizard: Downplayed. Although not to Grimm levels they do possess enhanced strength and durability. However, even the most powerful Hexenbiests can die as easily as a human from a blade or a bullet.

Lebensauger

  • Blood Lust: Like actual leeches they can and do drink human blood. Due to their size this will kill the victim. As such some use it as a method of murder.

Mauvais Dentes

  • The Dreaded: One of the most feared of all wesen, due to their reputation for wiping out entire villages.
  • Person of Mass Destruction: In centuries past, individual Mauvais Dentes would wipe out entire villages killing hundreds of people. In the present day only the Royal families have the power to control one.
  • To Serve Man: As well as slaughtering, they also eat people, or rather parts of them.

Phansigar

Wildermann

  • Beware of the Nice Ones: As a race they are commonly associated with tranquillity and gentleness. However, they are physically stronger than the majority of Wesen, including Blutbaden, and are able to casually rip people apart. If enraged to an uncontrollable degree, they can be extremely dangerous.

Ziegevolk

  • Charm Person: The majority of Ziegevolk, those commonly known as “breeders”, count as this, as their pheromone abilities merely make the other person more inclined to agree with them and make themselves appear more charismatic and attractive. It doesn’t allow them to force people to do their will. Unfortunately, some have further powers.
  • Compelling Voice: Some Ziegevolk, those commonly known as “herders”, possess the ability to enhance their pheromone powers by devouring a certain species of toad. In this case they can outright control and force their victims to obey their every word. The most powerful can have this bordering on outright brainwashing and can even rewrite memories.
  • Dirty Coward: As a race they will pick running over fighting every day.
  • Fragile Speedster: They possess goat like abilities to easily climb uneven terrain, as well as surprising speed and agility. However, they are no more durable than normal humans. This coupled with their cowardliness means they normally won’t stand and fight.
  • Serial Rapist: Ziegevolk who do possess greater powers commonly misuse them to rape large numbers of women, thus the reason they are known as “herders” in the wesen community.

war877 Grr... <3 from Untamed Wilds Since: Dec, 2015 Relationship Status: Having tea with Cthulhu
Grr... <3
#2875: Jul 18th 2016 at 2:21:04 AM

The squishy wizard example is good now.


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