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Fanfic / What Insertion?

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What Insertion? is a Self-Insert Mega Crossover fanfic written by Curtis Wildcat starting in early 2005. Cancelled as of August 14, 2020.

Inuyasha, following his final victory over Naraku, knows that he is in for a long wait before he can see Kagome again. Seeking a way to pass the time, he makes a wish on the Shikon Jewel to send him to a place where his presence would be needed. Meanwhile, in a distant reality, a fat human is trying his hand at writing a self-insertion fic but making little progress. Deciding to try again the next day, he goes to sleep.


Inuyasha's about to get his wish, and Curtis is about to get his material... in ways they don't expect, starting with their relocation to the mind of Hellmaster Phibrizzo towards the end of Slayers Next. Stuck in twin metaphysical (and from their standpoint, literal) chambers within the mazoku's mind—with Curtis appearing and disappearing depending on whether or not he is awake in the real world—they work to keep Phibrizzo alive past the confrontation with the Lord of Nightmares and sane through his adventures elsewhere.

The main story can be found here. An unfinished account of Dolphin's misadventures prior to her reunion with Phibrizzo, Case File: Raging Waves, can be found here.

This story contains examples of:

  • Abusive Parents: Arnold Long towards Nami, to the point where he attacked her after she lost an important tennis match. This led to Nami and Kronk quitting professional sports and fleeing to Japan to try and escape his influence.
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  • All Just a Dream: Dolphin theorizes at one point that her real self is either asleep or comatose back in the Slayers universe. She doesn't finish the thought, but it's implied she's starting to believe that she's trapped in a dreamscape created by the Lord of Nightmares' transport wave.
  • Alternate Universe Fic: As far as the Inuyasha-verse is concerned, since characters who were killed off in the source material actively have a role in Naraku's death in the prologue, and the Shikon no Tama was not used to kill him off. Justified as the story was being written several years before the conclusion of the manga.
  • Battle in the Center of the Mind: Phibrizzo did not take Inuyasha and Curtis's unexpected intrusion into his mind kindly, resulting in him trying to evict them by force.
  • Becoming the Mask: During the events of Slayers NEXT, Phibrizzo's default appearance was that of a well-meaning child. After becoming locked into this form upon his transition to Earth and losing most of his abilities, bringing his nature into question, having him truly become the friendly boy he looks like becomes Inuyasha and Curtis's goal.
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  • Cast from Hit Points: Flareon's 'Furnace'. It acts as an internal Sunny Day, doubling the intensity of his fire-type attacks, letting him burn opponents on contact and permitting the usage of Flame Wheel, but it gradually wears at his stamina as long as its active.
  • Cloud Cuckoolander: Deep Sea Dolphin falls under both this and Obfuscating Stupidity, below. Her means of relieving boredom tend to make people wonder about her mental stability.
  • Cluster F-Bomb: An off-scene instance: Domino, following her first meeting with Happosai. Go figure.
  • Combination Attack: A fair bunch of them, used by protagonists and antagonists alike. Flareon's Twilight Sphere (Flamethrower and Shadow Ball) is just one example.
  • Come with Me If You Want to Live: This is how the trio first meets Sherry: Azusa was in hot pursuit of Phibrizzo, and he was in serious need of a getaway vehicle. On seeing the trouble he was in, Sherry doesn't hesitate to let him in and quickly drive off.
  • Continuity Nod: References to several events in Pokemon Chronicles and Misty's brief trip to the Hoenn region are made, as is Conan's Moonlight Sonata case.
  • Cutting the Electronic Leash: After delivering an ultimatum to Gin through Sherry's cellphone, Inuyasha runs it through with Tessaiga. Sherry mentally notes that she should've seen it coming, since she could be tracked through her phone usage, but is still annoyed by the action.
  • Damsel in Distress: Azusa gets kidnapped midway through the story, prompting her cousin to go to the Moore Detective Agency to see about spearheading a rescue mission.
  • Dead Man Walking: It is implied that while Wanda's father survived having Project: Clandestine literally blow up in his face, he didn't last too long after that, being mostly unaware of what he was doing and surviving just long enough to impregnate Wanda's mother before dying.
  • Death Glare: Dolphin loves this trope, so much so that she actively uses them to mess with people.
  • Distant Finale: Chapter Twenty-four serves as this to the story, describing events such as an unknown ice person saving Vi from Chianti, and the fallout of Phibrizzo's final battle with Claude Jett.
  • Emotion Eater: The mazoku lords, and neither of them are happy to find out that they can't do this anymore after their Lord of Nightmares-sponsored trip.
  • Extra Digits: An opponent of Phibrizzo is noted as possessing an extra finger on each hand, due to inheriting a genetic mutation from someone who took part in Project: Clandestine.
  • For Want of a Nail: Inuyasha and Curtis being transported into Phibrizzo's mind and intervening on his behalf after he summons the Lord of Nightmares sets the story in motion.
  • Genius Ditz: Kronk, Nami's fellow attorney-at-law, somehow managed to become educated enough to form a law firm while remaining dense in most other matters.
  • Genki Girl: Aldonza, the warrior-in-training that Cologne brings on to test Phibrizzo's abilities. The bundle of energy she is, she never lingers in any one place for long.
  • Go-Karting with Bowser: By Phibrizzo's word, Zelas and Luna Inverse have this relation; instead of plotting ways to kill each other, they do things like play brass rackets and just generally hang out. They don't consider each other friends by any stretch, though: Zelas developed a measure of respect for Luna when she stared down death and asked if it wanted spiced chicken or not.
  • Mad Scientist: The person responsible for Project: Clandestine.
  • Must Have Caffeine: Dolphin absolutely loves her coffee. Sunburst loves Dolphin's coffee, too.
  • No Sense of Direction: Mrs. Valen, related to Ryouga Hibiki, has this problem. Subverted if she has access to both a map and a compass, which helps her keep her job as Teitan Elementary's principal, but in full force if she lacks one or both or them.
  • Obfuscating Stupidity: Dolphin. Underestimating her usually results in an instant deluge of water, either from her or her Pokemon, and she becomes dangerous when it comes time to take things seriously.
  • Off the Rails: Sherry de-aging early, and her sister Akemi avoiding her appointment with the Grim Reaper without being aware of it.
  • Rapunzel Hair: Dolphin's hair is noted to be so long that if she tried walking backwards while it was out of its twin ponytails, she'd trip and fall. A later chapter confirms that it is nine feet long.
  • Rejection Affection: Azusa thinks Phibrizzo is adorable and continually chases after him. Phibby, on the other hand, sees her as a psychotic kleptomaniac and would much rather have nothing to do with her.
  • Related in the Adaptation: Sherry and Azusa Shiratori are cousins in this story's setting, something which flummoxes the protagonists when this fact fully sinks in.
  • Running Gag:
    • Phibrizzo would repeatedly hit his head on stuff early on. This was phased out in later chapters.
    • Flareon stealing Dolphin's coffee off-screen.
    • Phibrizzo poking fun at the shrunken Shiho by addressing her as any of her Japanese and English names in some way, shape or form.
  • "Shaggy Dog" Story: Claude Jett made locating the head of Project: Clandestine his primary goal, setting up his own criminal group to do so and using his own recording label as a means to an end. His ventures would be doomed to failure, with Wanda admitting that the scientist in question had been dead for over a decade.
  • Shout-Out: Many, mostly to Megas XLR and One Piece. Other examples include:
    • The recurring character Aisha June, a direct copy of Aisha Clan-Clan.
    • The Team Rocket agents Stan and Ollie, best known as Laurel and Hardy.
    • A bemused Rachel quotes from The Princess Bride in response to one of Phibrizzo's rants.
    • Metallia was a former servant of Phibrizzo.
    • Phibrizzo tops off a prank against Dolphin by leaving behind a card allegedly sent by a drunken stork.
  • Sibling Yin-Yang: Phibrizzo is fire, takes most of his situations seriously, uses his abilities cautiously, and can't consume sugar without his energies being thrown out of wack. Dolphin is water, willing to have fun, throws around teleports and aqua-based attacks left and right, and suffers no food-related issues. In addition, their respective elements are capable of doing debilitating damage to their opposites.
  • Spared by the Adaptation: Akemi Miyano, at least for now.
  • Surprise Pregnancy: Phibrizzo pranks Dolphin along similar lines by making her think that an egg left in her bed as a result of a one-night stand between Sunburst and Jetsam was technically hers, driving her to distraction until Misty and Daisy can straighten things out.
  • Stalker with a Crush: Azusa towards Phibrizzo, to the point where she actively chases after him the moment she sees him. It's likely she just finds him cute instead of romantic, as she constantly refers to him as "Julien", but he doesn't know that.
  • Technophobia: Dolphin is incredibly leery of anything to do with technology; on one occasion, she accidentally trapped herself in the bathroom with a bluegrass-singing teddy bear and wouldn't stop screaming. Phibrizzo is quick to point out that this is an Absurd Phobia, since Dolphin has no qualms with using the coffee machine and toaster or listening to jazz on the radio.
  • Teen Genius:
    • Wanda Fitzgerald. Of course, considering who she is supposed to be...
    • The head of Project: Clandestine. Revealed in the Distant Finale to be Wanda's father.
  • The Dreaded:
    • Azusa Shiratori of all people is this to The Black Organization. Of course, she isn't aware of their existence.
    • Likewise, Chapter Five indicates that the Organization avoids the Nerima ward like the plague.
  • The Mole: Inuyasha tries to convince Sherry to become this when it comes to the Black Organization's activities. It later becomes moot when Gin attempts to kill her due to unrelated circumstances.
  • The Speechless: This trope is zigzagged in the case of Deep Sea Dolphin following her transfer to Cerulean City. As long as she's underwater, she can communicate normally. Outside of it, only water-type Pokemon can hear her; otherwise, everyone-herself included-can't hear a single thing she says, forcing her to rely on a notepad or signsnote  to make herself understood.
  • There Is No Kill Like Overkill: Or in this case, Over-attract, as the females present at Saffron City's first Pokemon Contest found out firsthand.
  • Trademark Favorite Food: For Dolphin, it's pretty much anything made of sugar.
  • Weaksauce Weakness: Intense heat and flames make Dolphin nearly useless.
  • When She Smiles: Phibrizzo lures Sherry to Nerima on one occasion with the intention of invoking this trope. She does, then later busts a gut laughing when all of the ward's lunacies hit her at once.
  • You Got Guts: According to Phibrizzo, this was the end result of Zelas Metallium meeting up with Luna Inverse for the first time: the latter stared death in the face and asked what it wanted for dinner.

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