Funny / Full Metal Panic? Fumoffu

This is one of the funniest anime of all time. We COULD just say "all of it" and leave it at that, but...

• After blowing up his shoe locker due to finding signs of someone having opened it, Sosuke interprets the burned scraps of the letter that had been inside it as a death threat. Kaname points out that the handwriting looks like a teenage girls so it was probably a love letter (as we already know it was) but Sosuke dismisses her suggestion by pointing out that a professional killer could easily disguise his handwriting (complete with an Imagine Spot of a thuggish-looking man sneering as he writes the letter, including adding the love heart to the end). Kaname has this response.
  Kaname: That's one creepy pro.
• Sosuke thinking that getting girls means literally catching them, which he does. His Oh, Crap! reaction when Kaname quickly explained what that actually means is hilarious.
• Full Metal Panic? Fumoffu is rife with these, but the best is when Sousuke acquires lunch... with a gun.
  Sousuke: (fires warning shot in the air) I DEMAND A PLAIN ROLL!!
  • The look on Kaname's face is priceless.
    Kaname: Why plain!?^note That's the joke; the entire reason for the lunchtime scrum is because everybody is rushing to get the good rolls before they sell out and only the plain ones that nobody (except, apparently, Sousuke) wants are left.
    • Gets a Brick Joke later in the episode when the students have been forced to take over distribution of the school lunches while the lunch lady takes time off to recover from the stampede Sosuke caused, and Sosuke complains that they didn't get any plain rolls.
• In the first episode, when the thugs are discussing with their boss how to get to Sousuke, Chidori is brought up, and she's described as less like his "girl" and more like "a rabid dog and his owner". A cartoonish images of Chidori as a thug with a gun-wielding Sagara dog on a leash comes up, and you can faintly hear Sousuke in the background going "Bark. Bark. Bark." in his usual deadpan businesslike tone.
• Once the thugs actually grab Kaname, she has a note stuck on her forehead saying "Hostage. Don't touch!"
• Oh come now, the Student Council President "translating" Sousuke's lines into street in the first episode. Chris Ayres' deadpan delivery in the dub is priceless.
  President Hayashimizu: Now listen, you punk, there's no way you'd beat me, so step off, 'cause you ain't even got one chance in a billion, you loser bi-otch.
  Sousuke: Your language skills are outstanding, Your Excellency!
• Also the slo-mo fight between Sousuke and a horde of Bond henchman knockoffs.
• And the wacky chase scene with the nutso cop lady.
  • Don't forget Sousuke's complete inability to play arcade shooter games: He runs out of ammo so pulls out a real gun and blows holes in the screen. But the punchline is, when asked why he didn't just reload by aiming and firing offscreen, he responds:
    Sousuke: That would be dangerous.
• How come no one has mentioned the rugby episode of Fumoffu? That episode was pure fun.
  • And then the game starts.
  • That entire episode was beautiful. It had Sousuke in a cardboard penalty box, rugby team ass-kicking, and Sousuke's awesome and absolutely hilarious motivational training monologue, courtesy of a book from Mao ^note  "How to abuse a training recruit", complete with an image of Mao blowing a kiss!. Even the special 'behind the scenes' notes on the DVD's (done like an authour's notes on a book) mention that on the training sequence, there was even a CMOF on the English dub; having been told that any swear words would be 'whizzed' out, the English cast went to town, improvising more swear words than a Quentin Tarantino movie.
  • If you listen closely enough in the English dub, you can make out what's been "whizzed" out as more often than not, it'd delve into Curse Cut Short territory.
• Hello? Bonta-kun shock troopers, anyone? Sousuke leading a group of yakuza into a highly fortified enemy stronghold to rescue Kaname, he and his elite team using SWAT-style Close Quarters Battle tactics against the enemy... while wearing amusement park mascot costumes.
  Kaname: What an embarrassing way to be rescued.
  Ren: Do you think so?, I think they're cute.
  • Sousuke training said yakuza. As they fail, he say's they're acting like street thugs, only for them to remind him that they are street thugs.
  • During the training montage, Sousuke leads the yakuza in a military-style jog around town, complete with cadence song. Since he's in the Bonta-kun costume however, all he can do is chant in Bonta-Kun's voice. Where it becomes funny is when the yakuza respond in exactly the same way, syllables and all.
• Not strictly part of the anime, but Arkada's review of FMP contains the most eloquent summary of Sousuke's attitude towards his captain; DO NOT WANT [edges away] WANT [edges forward] DO NOT WANT [edges away] WANT [edges forward] DO NOT WANT [edges away] WANT [edges forward]
• The smoke bomb scene is hilarious too.
• There's that scene where Kaname performs the Japanese Ocean Cyclone Suplex hold on Sousuke when he forgot her notes. And the subsequent mission that followed... all to obtain a notebook.
  • Which it turns out they didn't even need after all.
• Any scene involving the Police Lady's involvements with Sousuke. Especially in her fight with Bonta-kun!Sousuke, someone was having a little too much fun.
• Tessa explaining her credentials:
  Tessa: I'm a submariner! In other words, getting wet is my business.
  Kaname: Ooh. Poor choice of words.
  • Worse in the original dub, where Tessa says she's in the "water trade" (mizu-shobai) which is Japanese slang for the sex industry.
• Tessa tries to kiss Sousuke in Fumoffu when he was dragged unconscious out of the school pool after belly-flopping in to try and save her which is funny enough on its own. She loudly and dramatically declares that he needs CPR and as she leans in to put her mouth to his before Kaname pulls her back by the hair and angrily points out that he doesn't need it.
• Flirting 101 Chidori Style
  • Probably the funniest part of that scene is the final line of Kaname's Motor Mouth spiel: "In other words, you need to act like Kurz!"
• Kogure-sensei, the sports teacher, constantly tries to mess up the bread Sosuke and his friends are selling, only to fall victim to a Properly Paranoid Sosuke's anti-theft traps. Complete with shots of the man suffering as Sousuke outlines the effect of each trap on the human body to Chidori.
  • Not to mention the Running Gag of flies constantly landing on his face and him swatting them while in mid-rant- culminating in him swatting one while holding a fistful of sewing needles...
  • Then when the sports teacher finally gets Crazy-Prepared enough to go in with full body armour, helmet and gas mask, Sousuke has finally gotten the message from Chidori to stop booby-trapping the bread, so the teacher gleefully engages in sabotaging the bread with said sewing needles... completely oblivious to the principal standing right behind him with her arms folded and a stony glare on her face.
• Mao trolling our Chaste Hero when she gets held up by the weather, meaning Sousuke has to spend the night alone with Tessa.
  "You can jump her bones if you like! You have my permission, you lady killer!"
• Bonta-kun attacks a showering Tessa Psycho-style. With a banana!
• The entire episode where a biowarfare agent is released in class and there's only one vaccine, with its hilarious deconstruction of Cold Equation, Lottery of Doom, Heroic Sacrifice and the inevitable Rousing Speech.
• Sousuke in a karate fight.
  • Sousuke's Loophole Abuse when everyone complains
  • Kaname's decreasingly worried expressions.
• Episode 8 has the pool scene, which really has to be seen. Especially the Flash Back to Kurz "convincing" Tessa to wear a School Swimsuit, with the other guys attending the 'briefing' nodding 'seriously' at Kurz's impassioned words.
• Kurz giving a Rousing Speech to assault a heavily defended hill...so they can perve on the girls in a hot spring.
  • Shiji being so determined to penetrate Sosuke's traps that he goes into SEED- er, PANTIES Mode.
    • Only to end up tumbling face-first into Sosuke's junk - SPLASHrollrollrollWHAK!
    Sousuke: ...Mens' and Womens' baths change at 10.^note It takes place during the hot springs episode where Kurz, Onodera, and Kazama's attempts to peek on the girls are constantly thwarted by Sousuke. It all leads up to Kurz and Onodera taken out by Sousuke's various security measures, leaving only Kazama to, after a rousing speech from Kurz, make one last death or glory run to the hot springs, getting past the worst of the traps, and finally reaching the hot springs... only to tumble tail-over-teakettle face first into Sousuke's naked crotch.
• Chidori giving a Rousing Speech to assault a heavily defended hill...for the sake of our grades!
  • The end of the episode is also hilarious as the teacher is showing the principal some of the resulting artwork from that episode. All the other groups chose fairly mundane poses...except for Kaname's group, who took a fairly unique approach.