Proving to us that even the unabridged version of Yu-Gi-Oh can have a couple of laughs.
Yu-Gi-Oh!
In chapter 7 of the manga, Honda strangles Yugi not once, but twice. The first was when he thinks Yugi snickered after Jonouchi tells him that Honda was in love with Miho. The latter strangling ensues when Honda threatens to kill Yugi if he screws up on writing a love letter on a blank jigsaw puzzle that his grandfather had.
From the English dub:
Seto Kaiba: It's a new high-tech dueling device that allows players the realism of arena matches in any setting.
Joey: Looks like just a regular old briefcase to me.
Kaiba: It's in the briefcase, you moron.
Another one, from Ep 4:
Bystander 1: Whoa, sounds like a duel's going to start over there.
Bystander 2: That's Weevil Underwood, but who's the other guy?
Joey: That guy is Yugi Motou. He beat Kaiba. And I'm his best friend Joey Wheeler. (indicates Tea and Tristan) And these two? These two are trespassers.
The scene when Tristan, Tea and Bakura are climbing a rope into Pegasus' tower. Tristan wants Tea to go first so that he can catch her if she falls, but Tea complains, noting that she doesn't want them to look at her panties. Tristan's solution? Climbing up while blindfolded.
Made funnier when it's Bakura who has to explain that to Tristan.
Even funnier is the begining of the KC grand Prix. Kaiba says that anyone late to the opening ceremony will be disqualified. He then says to Mokuba, "Make sure Wheeler's late."
The episode in which Yugi basically sets his Other Self up, by claiming he's meeting Tea - and then switching with Yami at the last possible moment. Yami's reaction as he realizes he's just been set up on a date, is priceless.
Yami (dub): Hey!! Yugi... I'm not... You can't... This isn't a duel!!!! (notices Tea is staring at him) Oh. (Stands up straight) Hello.
Not to mention Yami getting Yugi back in kind during the KC Grand Championship arc:
Joey: About that Underdog card...you said it reminded you of someone, right?
Yami: ...I did? Oh, yes...um...a little help here?
Melvin Yami Marik: Your strategy backfired, giving me the advantage, little Joey!
Joey: Wrong! Do you think I'd be dumb enough to let that happen?
Yami Marik: Yes!
In episode 176, against Rafael; picture this with dramatic, high-tension background music and all the drama DAN GREEN can muster:
Yami: I'm using my Spider Web [card] to bring back your Monster Reborn card. And I'm planning on using it to save you by setting you free from the darkness!
How does Rafael respond?
Rafael: (Deadpan) Yeah, whatever.
Yu-Gi-Oh! R: During Bandit Keith and Joey's final duel, Bandit Keith tries to cheat like he used to.... only for his Duel Disk to start beeping its Anti-Cheating alarm until he takes the card back.
Yami Bakura's ungodly laughing fits, especially in the later seasons.
And his expression while laughing. Seriously, season 5 Dark Bakura is worse than Dark Malik in that regard.
One from the Japanese version is when Pegasus defeats Bandit Keith in a duel by telling a kid to follow instructions he wrote on a piece of paper. Keith's reaction when he sees the paper? "Oh my God! OH MY GOD!!"
Really just the first half of episode 2 in general, especially Grandpa's training session with Jounouchi ("YOU ARE NOT READY FOR THE TOURNAMENT YET!") and Jounouchi becoming overwhelmed with emotion and attempting to hug Grandpa... and failing, as Grandpa completely ignores him.
From Episode 168 of the English dub:
Seto Kaiba(to Yami): Stop saving the world and get a hobby!
Episode 68. Japanese version. When Jounouchi's parasite card fails to leech on Ryota Kajiki's card (and is, in fact, destroyed), Jounouchi's face combined with his shocked-calm voice had this troper giggling.
And Kaiba's incredulous comment to Yami: "This is ridiculous! You DO realize that you're talking to a hologram with your head on it?!" This, in the middle of a serious moment. Thanks, Kaiba.
Anyone else remember back in episode 18 when Joey was dueling Bones in that cave? And how his friends spent half the episode looking for him? First, coffins with skeletons that fall on Bakura and Tea... then Bakura chasing them with another skeleton draped on his back... and finally, Bakura stepping on a trigger that sends what appears to be a giant boulder that runs over the abused Bakura and almost corners them... until Tristan punches it... and it turns out to be a balloon with a speaker inside. Some of the funniest parts of Season One were all jammed into half an episode.
Joey: Bavarian cream would hit the spot right now...glazes and crullers... [sits up] GIGANTIC DONUT!
The original Japanese version, however, isn't really that funny aside from him sitting up in his sleep, because he's dreaming about his sister Shizuka.
The scene right after Bandit Keith sneaks into his room and steals his card.
Joey: Hey, let go of that! (Keith turns around and prepares to defend himself, but finds Joey is still asleep) That's my pizza!
Inside the Pyramid of Light, Tristan and Joey finally run into Yugi...and the mummiesclosebehind him.
I liked Joey and Tristan at the end of Bakura's intro episode.
Joey and Tristan: *hug each other in fear* Bakura!!!
Tristan: Hands off.
Joey: You grabbed me.
Joey&Tristan: *takes a second before it sinks in and they push each other away* BAAAAH!
From the Joey vs Zigfried duel, when Zigfried uses his three Norns combo.
Zigfried: Looks like it's one underdog vs three divas!
Joey: You mean fournote Zigfried looks very camp. divas!
Joey's various insults to the bad guys, especially if they're bald.
In the manga when Yuugi mentions that their digital pets have the ability to mate and gain strength from each other (which is awkward in the first place) to which Jounouchi responds, "Yuugi and I must mate at once!" Honda comments in frustration that people overhearing might get the wrong idea.
One of my favorite exchanges, during the campout in Duelist Kingdom:
Yugi: Joey, I don't think we should cook the candy bars-
Mako's entire entrance, really: First a wave quite literally washes over him during his dramatic rant, then he's crawls back up the cliff, mortified: "All right, let's try that again". Then the "Freaky Fish Guy" line above, then Tea giggles at the fact that he has an octopus on his head from the wave.
Easy with the technology, you spaz!
"Oh look guys, Joey named his chicken." "It's a Niwatori, Mai."
Bit of a Bilingual Bonus funny moment there: "Niwatori" is Japanese for "Chicken."
And what did Joey name his Niwatori? In the dub, at least — "Drumsticks."
During Yugi and Yami's final duel, Grandpa and Bakura do a happy dance.
Yugi beat the Pharaoh! Yugi beat the Pharaoh! Yugi beat the Pharaoh!
From episode 7 of season 2:
Joey: TRISTAN!! *groan* I'll kick your lyin' butt!
Seto's expression when Mokuba offers the others to fly home with them in the helicopter after Duelist Kingdom. They all squeeze into the backseat, and Seto just keeps grumbling all the time. Then Jounouchi almost falls out when he kicks a ladder down for Mai.
I know the dub abruptly cut the ending of the original anime short but, the last lines between Kaiba and Joey are the some of the best lines in my opinion.
Tristan: So this is the end? Feels weird.
Joey: Yeah...
Kaiba: What were you geeks expecting?
Joey: Fireworks, sappy music...something.
The best part is, Joey doesn't even snap at Kaiba. He just mildly lists a few common Happily Ever After cliches!
From the scripted duel between Yami and Yusei's VA's (see the Awesome page for a link), we get this exchange when it's over:
Yami: I do have one question. What's a Duel Runner for? Yusei: Well, actually, I like to think of it as card gameson motorcycles.
During the KC Grand Prix where Joey nearly gets disqualified in his duel against Mask the Rock because he's too busy eating. Then when he learns he's supposed to be up next, he runs halfway across Kaibaland taking the rest of the gang with him to get to the place of his duel and just barely makes it in time, only to discover that Mokuba has already arrived there ahead of him by taking the back way!
And in the Battle City arc, we have the most amusingly blunt response in the entire (monologue-heavy) series:
