Lake Misquamicus was an unremarkable lake in Florida, unremarkable that is, until suddenly it was filled with six billion gallons of blood, bile, pus, piss, shit and ...things... directly from the pits of Hell. First the public was in shock, then the government built a wall, and as time passed it became another urban legend. But for some, it has become a travel destination. Spring-breakers, drug-runners, and religious nuts. But a weekend getaway on the shores of Hell, may not be the safest idea...
Lakehouse Infernal is a novel by Christine Morgan. It's the fifth installment in Edward Lee's City Infernal series, being a direct sequel to Lucifer's Lottery.
This book contains examples of:
- Action Girl: Anna Garcia, one of the guards at the wall.
- Dark Action Girl: June turns out to be extremely talented at killing things. So much so that Favius ends up taking her as his queen.
- Death Is Cheap: People don't die in Area 666, they just "subcarnate" into the nearest convenient lifeform. It's theoretically possible for this to be a step up, but the odds are against it; more likely you'll come back as something small, weak and disgusting.
- Embarrassing Middle Name: June's middle name is "Esther," in case she needed more reasons to resent her mother.
- Fauns and Satyrs: Zilch (who is either a demon or a really far gone human) is said to look a lot like Phil from Disney's Hercules.
- Faux Affably Evil: Favius is polite, friendly, disciplined, courageous and soft-spoken. He also really enjoys things like raping people to death and bathing in the blood of infants, and he thinks nothing of befriending people, gaining their trust, and then brutally killing them when they've outlived their usefulness.
- Full-Name Ultimatum: June's mother is prone to "June Esther Goldsmith!"-ing her when she's mad.
- The Fundamentalist: June's band of holy rollers.
- Gag Penis:
- At the sight of Brother Lucas' equipment, June reflects that sex with him would probably kill her, but that it might just be worth it.
- The Ameri-Golem is outfitted with one, much to Favius' amusement.
- Guardian Angel: Ethriel is this to Greg. However, since she's a fairly low-ranking angel, she specifically guards him while he's traveling. When she first makes herself known to him it's to tell him to get up and start moving, because she's only able to protect him when he's going somewhere.
- Hell of a Time: A lot of the residents of Area 666 seem to have settled in quite well. Admittedly they have done so by going completely batshit insane, but still.
- I Have Boobs, You Must Obey!: Chelsea's default strategy in any situation seems to be showing her tits to someone. It usually works.
- Indy Hat Roll: When he's racing to get out before the infernal walls close around Area 666, Greg explicitly compares it to the part of a movie where the hero has to get out at the last second, while also being bleakly aware that This Is Reality and he doesn't have a chance of making it. With Ethriel's help, he does however make it out.
- I Surrender, Suckers: After testing humanity's defenses, Favius surrenders and lets himself be taken captive, all the better to manipulate the authorities into doing his bidding.
- Madness Mantra: After giving Andy a Mercy Kill, Kayla can't stop muttering "I had to do it, I had to do it," much to Chelsea's and Trevor's annoyance.
- Morality Kitchen Sink: The point of view characters range from the pure and good if somewhat snarky (Ethriel), to the semi-heroic (Greg), to the harmless but selfish (Andy) to the genuinely immoral but still sympathetic (June) to the all-out douchey (Trevor and Chelsea) to the horrifically evil which still has a few admirable qualities (Favius).
- New Powers as the Plot Demands: Greg turns out to be a warlock just when things look hopeless.
- Noble Demon: Deconstructed with Favius. Yes, he's genuinely loyal to his masters to the point of selflessness... but his masters are demons, and Favius is a complete psychopath who loves doing horrifying and sadistic things to people, so long as doing so doesn't get in the way of his duty.
- Not Allowed to Grow Up: Billy and Sherri haven't aged a day since AllHell. It's implied that Sharon is keeping them children through force of will since she doesn't want them to outgrow her.
- Number of the Beast: Part of the name of Area 666. Also, every section in the book has exactly 666 words.
- Old Maid: June is painfully aware that she's past her sell-by date, and that no one was buying even before it.
- Powered by a Forsaken Child: Agonicity, the main power source in Area 666. It lets you produce electricity through torturing someone.
- Rivers of Blood: The water in the lake has been replaced by the blood and excrement of its infernal equivalent.
- Shared Universe: The novel is explicitly a spinoff of Lucifer's Lottery, and has references to a number of Edward Lee's novels as well as to Christine Morgan's own earlier novel Spermjackers from Hell.
- Sold His Soul for a Donut: Ethriel warns Greg that he should really not go around saying things like "I'd sell my soul for a glass of water" when in Hell. Someone might take him up on it.
- The Stoner: Andy is aware that as far as teen cliches go, he's very much this.
- Straw Conservative: While none of the religious group are great people, the Shinns are explicitly said to have no real religious convictions but just using religion as an excuse to be shitty to people.
- Unwanted Rescue: June was really really okay with the fact that a demon was about to have its way with her. But then David and Ramon had to show up and ruin everything.
