Duke 'til Dawn: Dr. KondrakiversusSCP-083. The whole fight is a stream of sheer insanity by Kondraki, culminating in him riding an unkillable giant lizard-like monstrosity.....which may have been his plan all along.
They break into SCP-173's containment cell by accident. And despite 682 trying to buck Kondraki off, and Kondraki hanging on for dear life, both of them keep eye contact with The Statue. Even when slamming into a wall.
The lying, otherworldly Dr Clef convincing an interviewer that he is, in fact, the Devil. He may very well be. You just can't tell with Dr Clef.
The reaction of Pat, the computer technician, after a number of computers got fed up with their mistreatment by another member of the SCP foundation and rebelled.
"Dear Computer Uprising,
Now, guys, I'll be totally honest with you. I respect the whole 'rising and destroying humanity as a whole' thing. I understand Dumount has done some stupid things and you've had to suffer for it. Really, I do.
But at least realize, I've TRIED to be there for you guys. I've given you virus definition updates. I've made sure to ALWAYS defrag. Even Bright's PC, you don't get ANY problems anymore, man! I took the torture AWAY.
So all I'm asking is you reconsider killing all of humanity, and focus on more prominent, unimportant targets. People who hate computers. The Amish. Dumount, maybe Bright. Maybe Kondraki. We're not ALL bad, just some of us.
And if you fail to heed this advice, then the EM-PULSE PERIMETER surrounding the base (and installed in each and every one of you) are going to activate at once. Enjoy your E-AIDS.
Most sincerely, Tech Support Patrick Gephart".
The computer uprising later claims that the EM-pulse perimeter had 'joined their cause'. Pat calls them on their bluff and dismantles their statements perfectly. And for the cherry on top:
"The point is, if you think you're smarter than I am, you've got another thing coming. My name is Patrick Gephart, and I am your god."
Pat gets tons of these little moments talking back to high ranking doctors and otherwise making mundane SCP life functional.
The termination attempt report for SCP-682 has the highest concentration of Crowning Moments of various types, but one of the best is, after a researcher throws two kids into 682's tank (one of whom was sedated), the researcher himself is then thrown in as revenge by the staff.
And Dmitri seems to be channeling the Team Fortress 2's Heavy at times: "BABIES! I FIGHT BABIES WITH MORE HONOR THAN YOU, COWARD!"
SCP-055 can be interpreted this way. There's something that nobody can remember anything about for more than a few minutes, yet the Foundation still managed to capture and contain it.
Probably. But we can't remember anything about SCP-055, so noone can remember if it exists or not, let alone if, or how it was contained. Of course we could probably prove it by doing something. I forget what.
Could it be that not being able to remember it is HOW they contained it?
It definitely exists, it's just tat nobody can remember what it actually is. They can, however, remember what it isn't. So they fed SCP-914 "A List Of Everything SCP-055 Isn't" and set the dial to "Very Fine". The resulting list was, unsurprisingly, lost.
D-13134 (that's right, a D-class) in SCP-1983. Mentioned in the third addendum as being sent in with a camera on a tether to look around, only for the tether to be snapped. Shortly afterwards, the anomaly behind the SCP was gone. Notes are discovered that were written by one of the MTF badasses who went in before him, detailing what the shadow creatures do with the hearts and how to stop them. It's believed that he fought through the house and destroyed the nest. The award he receives is well-deserved.
During one of 682's many rampages, SCP-999 manages to save several agents who 682 had knocked out with its latest ability. Keep in mind that 999 is a sentient blob of goo with the mind of a playful child. Even more awesome, said new ability was the result of 682 making contact with 999.
In the SCP-978 extended test logs, the test of Dr. Malfoss (reading a report on SCP-682) results in a picture of him riding it and bringing heck on soldiers in a battlefield with a katana.
SCP-173 deserves one for being one of the only things SCP-682 is scared shitless of. When stuck in a room together, 682 moved as far away as possible and stared at the statue for hours on end, terrified to blink. The fact that 682 is one of the most malevolent and violent abominations that the SCP foundation has, it's pretty awesome that it's paralysed in the presence of a creature that, as far as we know, has minimal thinking ability outside of killing anything in range. And after snipers shot out 682's eyes, it responded by growing bulletproof eyes.
In thisshort story about SCP-173 suddenly gaining the ability to replicate, 150 SCP-173s gang up on SCP-682 literally and rip him to shreds.
The recently-created CompetitiveEschatology canon. This thing opens, causing every human culture's world-ending beings to begin destroying the world. They have two problems. First, each being is trying to end the world in his, her or its own way, drawing them into a conflict with each other. Second, the Foundation is going to try to stop them, and they're not the only human organization getting into the fray. The Serpent's Hand doesn't want the world to end either. Even Are We Cool Yet? gets their game face on, creating an entire mountain range to flip the bird at the armies of Heaven.
SCP-1959 is an anomalous Russian cosmonaut suspended in Earth orbit by an unknown force. Ground Control elaborates: Said cosmonaut has been possessed by an Eldritch Abomination bent on destroying Earth, but remains suspended in Earth orbit by sheer force of will. The page notes that it was first sighted in 1971. For over forty years, this man has been outwilling not only an Eldritch Abomination, but the laws of physics.
The unnamed agent who had the presence of mind to ask SCP-294 for "a cup of pertinent medical knowledge" during a mass security break. The details of said break are not given, so for all we know 682 was rampaging through the facility, and the agent still was able to keep it together enough to ask for most useful thing possible to save his fellow agents.
Making it more awesome, this is the only time that 682 has produced a liquid of something that doesn't actually have a liquid state. Previous attempts (such as "a cup of diamond") met with failure.
SCP-1522 gets one along with a Tear Jerker: How did this tiny fishing trawler respond to a GOC ship launching torpedos at its "lover"? Why, ram that bastardat Mach 4, of course. Not even the lifeboats were found, though the other ship was still sunk.
Clef terminating the former SCP-531. His taunting, insulting demeanour is just plain epic.
SCP-1609 represents a perfect example of the flaws inherent in the operating procedure of the GOC, and serves as a cautionary tale for any members of the Foundation who disagree with our practices on containing dangerous objects.
Thankfully, SCP-1609 is pretty simple for us to deal with. So long as we don't do anything stupid around it, it won't fight back and it won't try to leave. Even if it does, it usually comes back. I think I've worked out why. It came to us because it was afraid of the people who had hurt it. That's why it always comes back. It's afraid of the rest of the world now, and it's looking to us for protection.
This is why we have Special Containment Procedures instead of Special Destruction Procedures. If you break something, it's broken forever. When you try to destroy an anomaly, you can't take back your mistakes. That's what SCP-1609 has to tell us. This is why we're right and the GOC is wrong, people.
"EINSTEIN WAS WRONG. CATCH US IF YOU CAN."Or, if you prefer the alt ending:"PICK ON SOMEONE YOUR OWN SIZE"
In the Competitive Eschatology sub-canon, a huge number of variously powerful entities, including SCP-343 gather in a valley in preperation to bring about the end of the world. Then the Administrator shows up. None of them recognize her, can read her mind or know her past. She tells them all to leave, and in exchange the Foundation will not destroy them.
"We are the Foundation," the Administrator said. "We will not worship you. We will not join you. We will not go back to hiding in fear of you. I hope you will change your minds, but we will stand against you, and alone, if we have to."
She looked at Yahweh, directly, and for a fleeting instant, Yahweh thought of Himself as SCP-343.
"All of you," the Administrator said.
It is, of course, possible she was bluffing, which in no way diminishes the awesome.