Follow TV Tropes

Following

Quotes / Annoying Video-Game Helper

Go To

Why are tutorials built into games nowadays? R-remember when I f*cking put in Super Mario World?! It went "Da-da-da-da Da-da-da-da DAA-da!", and I pushed START, and I pushed A, and I was PLAYING THE F*CKING GAME!! I didn't need Monita to be like "You must push A to jump, and go left." F*CK YOU!!! You stupid, f*cking, whore, computer, B*TCH!!! I KNOW HOW TO PLAY GAMES!!!

"EMERGENCY, LEFT TURN, LEFT TURN. EMERGENCY, LEFT TURN, LEFT TURN. EMERGENCY, LEFT TURN, LEFT TURN. EMERGENCY, LEFT TURN, LEFT TURN. EMERGENCY, RIGHT TURN, RIGHT TURN. EMERGENCY, RIGHT TURN, RIGHT TURN. EMERGENCY, RIGHT TURN, RIGHT TURN."
Top Landing typical run

Advertisement:
She'd waste entire health sprays on me if I so much as stood on a thumbtack. I appreciate the sentiment, but you're not my fucking mum, woman! One time I was low on health - but not too low - and was about to use a small herb to keep myself going when I saw my partner coming towards me brandishing a valuable large herb. And when you're running away from your support character with more desperate terror than you feel for any of the actual monsters, something has definitely gone wrong somewhere!

Ganondorf: "Huh. Didn't know that sword came with a Microsoft Office Assistant."
Commander Badass: "That's cool I guess."
Ganondorf: You'd think that after a quarter-century of questing and some twelve reincarnations they'd give the kid an option to turn that off."

Advertisement:
Navi: "Hey! Listen!"
Link: SHUT THE FUCK UP, NAVI!

Roll: MEGAMAN! THOSE PLATFORMS FALL WHEN YOU-
Egoraptor: HEY NO FUCKING SHIT! They're falling! They're fucking falling! I can see that! How many fu-UGH! I'm going crazy here!
(Roll starts sobbing)
Egoraptor: (Sighs) I'm sorry I just...I don't feel sorry for you.

"Listen up, Player! Here's where I give you advice you didn't ask for!"

"You again! And there's that phone again too! Why? Why?"

"Graham, watch out! A POIsonous snake!"
Top

Example of:

/
/

Feedback