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Funny / The Emperor's New School

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  • Much of Kuzco's Doodles qualify.
  • "Officer Kronk":
    Kronk: If you keep having me dungeoning people you're gonna end up emperor of nothing. Just like that guy... in the story... who, uh, ended up emperor... of nothing.
    • After Kronk arrests everyone, the scenery is only outlines because he arrested the background painters.
    • When Kuzco has Kronk arrest Yzma, he gives the justification that "it's against the rules to be ugly beyond all belief", and "dinosaurs are no longer allowed to roam the earth".
  • "Bride of Kuzco": The ending where, not even the guy who marries Princess Lalala can stand her annoying personality either. It's to the point where during their picnic, he voluntarily note  changes himself into a llama and elopes with his own female llama steed.
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  • "Evil and Eviller":
    Mr. Moleguaco: (strapped to a lunette) Evil isn't glamorous. Being bad isn't... good.
    Kuzco: Thanks for the obvious, Mr. M. I don't know what I'll do without you.
    Mr. Moleguaco: Now can you let me out of this thing? I didn't think ahead.
    Kuzco: No way. I'm trouble with a capital "T". (whispering to Malina) Trouble does start with a "T", right?
    Mr. Moleguaco: You're about to be in BIG TROUBLE!!
    Kuzco: (beat) Do you have a hacksaw?

    Kuzco: Ms. Ni? What's your sister's name, Ms. Elbow? Ha. I'm trouble.
    Ms. Ni: Actually, my sister's name is Ms. Ni too since Ni is our last name.
    Kuzco: Yeah, well, what's your brother's... er, huh, I mean... wait give me a sec...
    Ms. Ni: I should mention I'm now in charge of student discipline. Troublemakers will be dealt with swiftly and severly—
    Kuzco: I got it! What's your mother's maiden name, Ms. Elbow?
    Kronk: Okay, okay. Let me see if I understand. Because her name is Ni, which sounds like "knee", then it would be funny if her mother's real name also represented a hinging joint of the body. Is that... right?
    Kuzco: You got it, Kronky.
    Kronk: Ha ha ha! Ms. Elbow! Rich!
    Kuzco: I'm on fire!
    Ms. Ni: No you're not. But since you seem to be a troublemaker, I'll be watching you from now on.
    Yzma (Principal Amzy): Eh, I'll be watching you too.
  • "Kuzclone"
    • Kuzco's paper on his best friend, Brad Bowllama:
    "Brad Bowllama, my super-cool and very funny best friend by Kuzco
    Brad Bowllama is a super-cool and funny and he use to be emperor and he's funny. He likes everything I like and he hates cauliflower which I hate too. He doesn't like Yzma either. He thinks Malina is a hotty-hot-hot-hot-hotty, and should spend more time with Kuzco. And did I mention he's super-cool and he's funny? Because he is. The end."
    • Doubling as a heartwarming moment, Kuzco's report later about his real best friends.
    "Malina, Pacha and Kronk are my real super-cool and very funny best friends. The end."
    • The Yzma/Amzy gag for the episode.
    Yzma: Kronk! (rips her Principal Amzy disguise) It's me!
    Kronk: Wow! Right, then who am I? (rips his clothes off, revealing his underwear)
    Yzma: You're Kronk. In underwear.
    Kronk: (covers himself) Aah!
    • Also, Malina says that while the name Brad Bowllama is a stupid name that came from common objects, it's still a better name than "Mr. Bananastaircasehat". During the credits, Mr. Moleguaco reads an essay from a student describing a "friend" with that very name.
    • When Malina, Pacha and Kronk save Kuzco from one of Yzma's traps, they all turn around to see Yzma glaring down at them and threateningly asking "And just where are you going!?" All four of them are understandably frightened...and then Yzma asks why they're not answering her question. Turns out she really was just asking where they were going and not trying to foil Kuzco's escape attempt.
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    • When the cloning potion is wearing off, Brad Bowllama starts to gradually shrink. Malina even nicknames him "the incredible shrinking Kuzco"
    • Three words: The Kuzco Mambo.
  • "Attack Sub"
    Mr. Moleguaco: This morning we're going to discuss relative pronouns, such as "what" and "that".
    Kuzco: What? When are we ever gonna use that?
    • One of Kuzco and Kronk's plan to get out of class involves a radiation meltdown.
    Kuzco: There's been a dangerous radiation leak!
    Kronk: (runs out of the class with a wooden arm tied to him) Oh no! A third arm! This dangerous radiation leak must be turning me... into a mutant!
    Mr. Moleguaco: (rips the arm off) Your mutant arm is made of wood.
  • In "Girls Behaving Oddly", Kuzco pointing out all the signs that Malina isn't taking it easy (i.e. bulging eyes, flared nostrils, and scary teeth) and that she looks like Pacha when he's angry at Kuzco for using his poncho as a towel, complete with a picture of an angry Pacha with red eyes. Here's the scene.
    • The fact that Kuzco is ecstatic about a C+... but Kronk has a B average.
    • Later, we have this:
    Kuzco: (about Malina) How about we brainwash her?
    (shows an image of Kuzco and Kronk holding a pair of sponges up to Malina's head)
    Kronk: Nah, Malina's too smart for that. Plus brain soap's expensive.
  • "The Emperor's New Musical"
    • During the credits:
    Malina: What are you staring at?
    Kuzco: We kissed and you said wow.
  • In every episode... The lever.
    Yzma: Pull the lever, Kronk!
    (Kronk pulls the lever, and the fire alarm goes off prompting everyone to run out of the school)
    Yzma: (on the loudspeakers) False alarm, false alarm! Back to your rooms, you pin-brains. Okay, let's see... "To the secret lab", "Pull the lever, Kronk", something goes wrong, then the wall spins.
    (Kronk pulls the right lever)
  • In an episode where Kuzco's issue du jour is that he's not doing well in squirrel speak class, he asks the teacher if he'd save someone's life by saying "[set of squirrel sounds]". The teacher snarks "I doubt it given that you just said 'Go ahead; jump in the shark tank'."
  • In "The Mystery of Micchu Pachu", Kuzco pauses the episode so he can make fun of Kavo by scribbling on him.
    Kuzco: (in a mockingly hitch-pitched voice) Hi, I'm Kavo the Clown. I like to hold pretty flowers and wear a swim floatie that looks like a bunny.


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