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Funny / Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

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  • Mac: Don't get clever, Boris, You don't know him.— (Sees Boris with a crazed look in his eyes driving faster towards the oncoming Indy) Know him, KNOW HIM! You don't know him! YOU DON'T KNOW HIM! YOU DON'T KNOW HIM! YOU DON'T KNOW- (vehicles crash and flip up into the air, Indy escaping à la Spider-Man on a light fixture)
  • "No defiant last words, Dr. Jones?" "I. Like. Ike."
    • Even funnier, if you pause just as the nuke is seen above the testing site, it seems that the government has the same idea to use "I Like Ike" on the side of the weapon. So, like "I Like Ike" were nearly Indy's last words, "I Like Ike" was the last words that the Russian Mooks heard/saw trying to escape from the testing site.
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  • The warehouse escape. Indy tangled with Dovchenko and their fight makes its way into a secret testing chamber for a rocket sled. As you can most assuredly predict, they wind up activating it and when the rocket starts blasting, the soldiers that followed them are charbroiled alive! Meanwhile Indy and Dovchenko get a ride they’ll not soon forget when the ride the rocket sled all the way to the end of the tracks at around Mach-3! The g-force leaves them with the most hilarious faces as they take a leisurely ride through the desert night. And once it finally stops, Indy looks to see Dovchenko passed out and resting his head on his shoulder!
  • When Indy finds Oxley insane.
    Indy: Ox, listen to me, pal. Your name is Harold Oxley. You were born in Leeds, England. You and I went to school together at the University of Chicago, and you were never this interesting.
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  • "Damn! I thought that was closer!"
  • Indy and Mutt butting into the school library with a motorcycle and the ensuing scene with the student.
    Indy: You want to be a good archaeologist, (Mutt drives them out of the building on his motorcycle) you've got to get out of the library!
    Student: (looks after them mildly confused)
    • Similar to Indy and his father riding a motorcycle.
    • Like his father, Indy was not amused at Mutt's driving. Mostly because he just decapitated the statue of his old friend Marcus Brody.
    • Our old friend, the Wilhelm Scream, returns... as Mutt nearly runs down a college kid in the university library. You probably expected a Wilhelm in the film (it's pretty much Once an Episode in this franchise), but not there.
  • When Indy, Marion, Oxley and Mutt are running from the Soviets' campsite (provoked by Mutt's own Indy Ploy), Indy says "This is intolerable!" Apparently now that his old man is dead, Indy is picking up his speech mannerisms (a thing that people with recently dead (grand)parents will attest is often Truth in Television).
  • Marion giving Mutt advice during his swordfight with Irina, and also Mutt narrowly avoiding Groin Attack by some plants.
  • The waterfall portion.
    • "Three times it drops."
    • And Indy actually takes his hat off just before the third drop.
  • The bit with the drysand pit:
    Mutt: Grab the snake!
    Indy: Stop calling it that!
    Mutt: It's a snake, what do you want me to call it?
    Indy: Say rope!
    Mutt: What?!
    Indy: Say, "Grab the rope!"
    Mutt and Marion: GRAB THE ROPE!
  • After Indy learns Mutt is his son (and after he didn't mind the story about how he dropped out of college for no real reason), blowing up on Marion, going, "WHY THE HELL DIDN'T YOU MAKE HIM FINISH SCHOOL?!"
    • The gag is sold when the drysand pit stops pulling them down when the revelation is made.
    • The fact that Indy never officially finished high school pretty much makes him a big 'ol hypocrite.
  • The Jones gang almost being pushed off the cliff, whilst Mac yells "This is VERY dangerous!" in a hysterical voice and Oxley laughs maniacally.
  • The nuclear testing ground. The overly bright colors and happy figurines just scream The '50s so well that it borders on parody.
    • When the Russian soldiers searching for Indy realize what the town actually is, they understandably try to hightail it out of there. The funny part comes when Indy tries to catch up with their car.
      Indy: Wait! Waitwaitwaitwaitwaitwaitwait!!! (car drives off) SURE, GREAT, DON'T WAIT FOR ME!!!
    • And it ends with a much-divisive case of Refuge in Audacity: having to, as usual, think fast before he dies, Indy hurriedly takes out everything from a refrigerator and hides inside it. And it works!
  • When the Jones gang are attacked by natives at Orellana's tomb, one of them was about to shoot a poison dart at an unsuspecting Mutt, only for Indy to pop up and blow it right back into the native's throat. This mirrors the same trick Bugs Bunny used in the Looney Tunes shorts "Bushy Hare" and "Pre-Hysterical Hare".
  • The argument between Indy, Mutt, and Marion after Mutt finds out that Indy is his dad. He takes it better than that other kid, though he also spends some time in denial. Then the Soviet guarding them is so annoyed by the continued arguing that he gags Marion - who is still able to shout despite her mouth being tied shut. (She must have had some practice after Raiders.) And then all three of them overpower the guard before the big jungle chase.
  • Indy and Mutt starting a big fight between jocks and greasers at a malt shop to escape Soviet agents. The funny part being, you really don't know why Indy told him to punch Joe College... until he backs up into his friends, all wearing the same jackets... and a bunch of guys dressed like Mutt back him up... THEN you go "ooooooooohhhhh", and the fight music starts.
    • The fight music? Bill Haley & His Comets' "Shake, Rattle and Roll".
    • As Indy and Mutt flee you can even see several people sprinting towards the malt shop to join the fight.
    • The best part? While Indy and Mutt are running away from the agents they make a turn and drive by the shop again, to find that the jocks and greasers (and some of the girlfriends) still duking it out!
  • When our heroes begin their escape from the carvan, Marion slides into the driver's seat of the truck while Indy ducks into the back for a weapon as if it's completely old hat for them. Equal parts Funny, Heartwarming, and Awesome is the look Mutt gives his Mom. He's probably never seen his mother in action before, and now he's both confused and a little awestruck. "Wow. My parents are a Battle Couple."
    Mutt: What's he gonna do now?
    Marion: I don't think he plans that far ahead.
    (Indy leans out of the opening into the back of the truck with a freaking rocket launcher)
  • Here's something ironic. When Indy cautions Mutt about how it's not wise to bring a knife to a gunfight, well, Mutt should trust him on that one.
  • The killer ants try to take Indy's hat.
  • The scene prior and after Spalko uses the skull on Indy. When Indy says he's gonna break your nose, it doesn't matter if an alien skull messes with his head, he'll do it. Just ask Mac.
    Indy: Eventually, they're gonna let me out of this chair, comrade, and when they do, I'm going to break your nose.
    [minutes later they let him out of the chair and Indy punches Mac]
    Mac: You broke my nose!!!
    Indy: I told you.
  • This little gem:
    Mac: [In Indy's chokehold] Indy.
    Indy: Shut up!
    Mac: Indy!
    Indy: SHUT UP!
    Mac: INDY!
  • "Somewhere, your grandpa is laughing."
  • The wedding scene. When the pastor says, "You may kiss your bride", Marion hands him her bouquet and kisses Indy. The look on Mutt's face is priceless.
    • Shortly after this, the door of the chapel blows open and the wind blows Indy's hat at Mutt's feet. Mutt picks it up and is about to put it on... when Indy walks past and takes it from him.
  • This conversation at the beginning of the film.
    Dovchenko: You recognize building, yes?
    Indy: (sees the dead American soldiers) Drop dead.
    [Gets a vicious backhand]
  • In the novelization, when Mac's treachery is revealed a second time, Indy tells him to make up his mind as Marion mentions she's really getting sick of him. Spalko, meanwhile, ignores the confrontation as she simply and casually claims the Crystal Skull.

  • A meta-example. When Harrison Ford appeared on The Tonight Show to promote the movie, Jay Leno played a "clip" from the movie—an old man hobbling along with a walker with the theme tune playing, obviously poking fun at Ford's advanced age. As the audience roared with laughter, Ford, not to be outdone, cracked, "Actually, that's my stunt double."