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"Zoo Race is... is a game. Someone made this. This is a thing that exists and was put into the world knowingly."
JonTron, The Zoo Race episode
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Zoo Race is a Christian-themed animal racing game. It was released independently in 2007 on the developers' own website, and is freely available for download.

In it, a researcher named Reuben is reading about Noah's Ark, when Hannah, a librarian, makes fun of him for it. For reasons unknown, both they and others are transformed into animals, and pitted in a foot race.


Tropes present in Zoo Race:

  • Alliterative Name: Each human is turned into an animal with the same first letter as their name: Reuben Rhinoceros, Hannah Horse, Priscilla Pig, etc.
  • Anachronism Stew: It's supposed to take place right after Noah's ark was opened. There are fully-populated cities, exploding barrels, hot air balloons, and Egyptian tombs. Then there's a NASA Space Shuttle on the moon, complete with solid rocket boosters and fuel tank. Note that the Space Shuttle is not designed to land on the moon, and that the Solid Rocket Boosters and Fuel Tank are jettisoned on launch, although that is well down the list of things that you should be concerned about, accuracy-wise.
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  • Animorphism: People get turned into animals in the intro.
  • Aquatic Sauropods: Averted with the Brachiosaurus in Seth’s Safari, which is standing firmly on dry land.
  • Artistic License – Physics: Leaping makes you go faster than running, no matter which animal you choose.
  • Batman Can Breathe in Space: All of the animals can breathe perfectly fine on the Moon. There’s even crows flying around and pooping on the lunar surface.
  • Bears Are Bad News: Averted with Bethany the Bear.
  • Creepy Crows: There are crows flying around in both the first part of Hannah’s Heights and the later half of Gad’s Galaxy, in the latter case being on the Moon. They just fly around without harming the racing animals, but their poop is an obstacle.
  • Dance Party Ending: Your reward after completing a course.
  • Exploding Barrels: These get thrown downhill at some courses.
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  • Fiendish Fish: Both barracudas and piranhas are a hazard in the water. The barracudas can be found in the waters of Cain’s Caverns, and the piranhas are found in both Cain’s Caverns and Bethany’s Blaster.
  • Gentle Giant Sauropod: The Brachiosaurus in Seth’s Safari is dunking a railway locomotive in the water, and is harmless to the animals.
  • The Great Flood: Every level has water, and the animals come straight from Noah's ark to the starting line.
  • Human Cannonball: In one of the courses, animals are shot out from a cannon.
  • Panthera Awesome: Cain the Cougar and Tamar the Tiger.
  • Piranha Problem: The cave in Cain’s Caverns is filled with enormous piranhas. The giant piranhas are also lurking in the waters of Bethany’s Blaster.
  • Plot Tailored to the Party: Swimming and strength sections are obligatory, and sometimes out of place, in every track.
  • Ptero Soarer: In Seth’s Safari, pterosaurs resembling small Pteranodons can be found flying over the water.
  • Raptor Attack: Some featherless dromaeosaurs appear in Seth’s Safari. They can be found stalking the edge of the river the animals swim in.
  • Rhino Rampage: Rueben can break through obstacles.
  • Rodents of Unusual Size: Giant rats are a hazard when running out the banks of the lake in Bethany’s Blaster.
  • Rocket Ride: In one of the courses, Gad’s Galaxy, this happens so the animal can conclude the race in the moon.
  • Schizo Tech: There's a lot of modern technology mixed with the ancient setting.

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