Come in, Polyblank. Here, have a seat.*sits down on whoopee cushion*Now, we want you to take on the task of describing this electronic first-person game by the name of Jazzpunk. Intel describes it as a first-person comedy adventure game that came to Windows and OS X-enabled computer entertainment devices via Steam and GoG on February 7th 2014 by way of a two-man Canadian developer by the name of Necrophone Games.The game itself takes place in an alternate-history version of the Cold War, featuring an assortment of Cyber Punk tropes and bizarre references, all of which are Played for Laughs. I guess you could argue, Polyblank, that this game is built entirely around Rule of Funny.The whole point of the game is that you're dropped into a certain area and given a simple mission to complete, but the player can wander around the level and find all the quirky references and various assorted bizarre things all over the level in their own time.That's all we know. What we want you to do is venture into this game, and gather all examples of various tropes from within its electronic landscape. Here's your standard perscription of Missionoyl. If you need me, I'll be in the wine cellar.*picks up perscription**gulp*
Ambiguous Gender: One the one hand, your arms and legs are usually shown as very hairy. On the other hand, you can easily pass as a bombshell blonde, and can also participate in some activities with women. The live-action trailer portrays Agent Polyblank as a young white male, however, and the hairy arms as extendable props.
Apologetic Attacker: A street bartender gives you some truly horrid drinks, then apologizes in shame after each one.
Art Shift: While characters in the player's view are depicted with the minimalist bathroom signage style, the player's own hands are depicted in a more detailed, semi-cartoony look. Justified in that these limbs are just cardboard cut outs on the end of sticks.
Behind a Stick: One of the mooks in the Soviet Consulate area does this behind various trees.
Bonnie Scotland: The manager at the resort is inexplicably Scottish, and claims to be trying to be "ambiguously exotic".
Bowled Over: One sequence which involves the player escaping from a band of mooks looking to reclaim the cybernetic kidney you just stole involves the player barging past said mooks, resulting in the sound of bowling pins being knocked over. Lampshaded twice when one mook utters, "Bowling joke", and when the last group of mooks before the level exit has a giant bowling pin in mook clothing amongst the other mooks.
But Thou Must: A few examples. Even if you know the drink sent to you by one of the ladies at the resort is a trap, you still have to drink it and get drugged. Likewise at the end, pressing either of the buttons below the Director's tank results in the Director getting turned into a crocodile (or alligator) and you end up getting eaten.
The Dev Team Thinks of Everything: If you try to active the dev console with ` (the tilde key), a joke one appears. Standard functions like godmode and noclip are available, both of which are pointless considering, as well as joke ones like "toggle french moustache".
Expospeak Gag: One of these appears in the Steam description. It refers to "the human voice captured and preserved in CryoSonic Stasis™, thawed before your very ears during NPC exchanges!". It's referring to voice acting.
Failure Is the Only Option: Twice during the finale. Firstly, the only way to beat the Editor is to let him win, then shower him with prizes so his ego becomes overinflated. Secondly, both of the buttons below the tank the Director is being held in result in the player getting eaten by the Editor as either an alligator or a crocodile.
Falling Damage: Subverted For Laughs - every time the player falls a significant height, they land with a comedic "boing" sound.
Fantastic Drug: You have to take a drug to start each mission (Combining it with another drug causes a warning to pop up which then glitches up and breaks), it's implied that you take a drug to start your vacation, and you leave the simulation by taking a drug.
Fem Bot: The robot prostitute that appears in the Soviet Consulate area.
Flying Car: The player travels to the different parts of the Big Bad's challenges in a flying golf cart.
Foreign Queasine: The Japanese chef near the start of one level serves up enough of this to invoke a Spit Take in the player three times.
Gainax Ending: Deliberately invoked (unsurprisingly). You eat your boss' secretary out of her jell-o prison and, while trying to save your boss, turn him into an alligator/crocodile before he eats you. You then get to walk through his insides while a fake credits sequence rolls.
God Mode: This is possible by using the game's console. Subverted in that nothing can actually kill you in this game, and parodied with the "Atheist Mode".
Go Karting with Bowser: The Editor challenges you to a number of sporting events. And you have to let him win.
Hacking Minigame: By putting on a strange helmet, the player is able to grab bits of code floating in midair with a frog tongue.
Interface Screw: Not only does taking most non-human-oriented alcohol cause the screen to briefly be filled with static, but taking a certain drug found in the Soviet Consulate level causes a warning to pop up warning you against doing that...before degrading into gibberish and then crashing to the ground.
Japan Takes Over the World: All the currency is stated to be in yen (even when written as dollars), the intro is full of Japanese text, etc. etc.
Obnoxiously smoking and throwing popcorn at people in a movie theater (Since the popcorn lingers during a play session, players can trash the entire cinema with repeat visits).
Blinding mooks by bursting bubblegum in their face or throwing hot food in their face.
Stealing a coin from a busker just to use it in a newspaper stand.
Helping a vase shop owner kill the flies in her shop...and then smashing up the vases anyway. The post-game credits sequence even keeps score of this.
Squirting pufferfish poison at everyone.
Knocking over an entire cinema queue.
Use a photocopier to make a pile of Cheek Copies while infiltrating a Soviet Consulate building.
Spit Take your unpleasant Eastern delicacies in the face of the man sitting next to you.
Look Behind You: Happens in two separate places with a random bum who spouts mindless rambling paranoid conspiracy theories at you. At one point, he says, "Ya gotta look behind you". Do this and he runs away.
Happens again when the player is going to rescue the Director. He tells you to look behind you, revealing...a crab. The Editor then spends 20 seconds trying to get Polyblank to look in the right place.
Lotus-Eater Machine: An informant reveals to you that the entirety of the Kai Tak Resort is one of these.
Picking up a fruit bowl in one area reveals a small Carmen Miranda lookalike who recites Rita Repulsa's opening speech from Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers verbatim...before throwing assorted fruit at you.
If you look through the coin-operated binoculars on the second floor of the Kai Tak Resort, you get the gun barrel opening from the James Bond films, complete with opening theme and everything. Then you find out that "James Bond" is actually hovering in front of you, but he doesn't fall until you see him. And he lets out a goat scream for good measure.
Should you call the Kremlin on your first mission, the hold music is "Theme A" from Tetris.
Slippery Skid: The floor near the exit to the Soviet Consulate level does this.
Sore Loser: Even if you beat The Editor, He claims it is "reverse winning" and you're forced to give him accolades to continue. You still get the last laugh as he literally inflates the more you feed his ego until you can send him skyrocketing via a needle.
Spinning Paper: Several of these appear throughout the Soviet Consulate area. Parodied when one of the headlines is about how the nation is gripped by an uneventful day.
Another news story on the page offhandedly mentions that the moon just blew up.
Spit Take: An Asian restaurant owner ends up invoking this in the player three times with really unappetising food ingredients.
The Tooth Hurts: The man who reveals that the resort is a simulation does this to the player in order to get rid of a tooth-implanted listening device.
Trade Snark: Frequently, throughout the trailers and the Steam page, acting as if the game is presented as a vintage film using all sorts of fantastic new technology like "Stereographic Polygony Soundeo™, NOW IN COLORVISION".
Transhuman Treachery: The director after the player turns him into a crocodile or aligator. He pretty much states "Hey I'm an animal that eats people now, so let's just cut out the middle man and get it over with already.
Travel Montage: When The Director sends you off on a vacation, the game suddenly cuts to a player-controlled variation on this trope, where passing the dotted line over various locations on the world map triggers a Hurricane Of Technology-Related Puns based on certain place names.
Trope 2000: One of the gadgets has the name "Exhumer 3000" printed on it.
Wide Open Sandbox: The main mission objectives in each area can be completed within a short space of time. The whole point of each area, however, is to get distracted by various Funny Background Events and find all the harder-to-find jokes.
Lampshaded in one moment where the game congratulates you on being the 1032nd player to examine an ordinary pile of garbage.
World of Pun: Pretty much everything is retro-cyberized. Also taken literally in the vacation travel minigame.
Robotic Hooker: [giggles] ".rar~ Am I Turing you on?"
Jazz Musician: "Got a couple of gigs coming up. Almost a terabyte. Just like dat. I record on .dat."
Jokes also reference typography (A geisha tells you "It's rude to ask a lady her font weight.") and game design (one target says he was "born on a render farm".)