Narm / Metal Gear

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!

What was that noise?

...

Oh... it's just some Metal Gear Narm...
Eight-bit Metal Gear
  • Natasha's amazing Final Speech in Metal Gear 2: Solid Snake. She manages to directly contradict her own ridiculous metaphor, twice.
  • The "deadly poisonous Zanzibar hamsters" (see the ridiculous line in all of its glory on the main Narm.Video Games page).
  • Likewise, "I FEEL ASLEEP!!"
  • "UH OH! THE TRUCK HAVE STARTED TO MOVE!"
  • The owl puzzle, which involved hatching an adult owl from an egg and making it hoot to trick a guard into thinking it's nighttime.
  • Fan Translation: Snake's response to having to beat his best friend to death: "FOX! I'LL KICK YOUR TWISTED MIND OUT OF YOU!"
  • The whole game becomes one long Narm if you're more used to the Solid games. If you are, you will be familiar with Snake as a badass Shell-Shocked Veteran-slash-Cool Old Guy and accustomed to the heavy melodrama. It's jarring to pick up a Metal Gear and see exactly what traumatized Snake into Heroic B.S.O.D. in Metal Gear Solid.
  • The climactic battle with Gray Fox would have been moving had it not been entirely based around Fox running around you like a chicken with its head cut off and flailing punches every now and again. What makes it even funnier is the way it's retold in the briefing files of Metal Gear Solid when juxtaposed with the actual gameplay:
    In the midst of a minefield, Snake and Fox fought without any weapons. A fist-to-fist duel involving no hatred or murder intent. During that weird moment of purity, the two were bound by forces transcending words and emotion.
    • In Metal Gear 2: Solid Snake, Gray Fox, on his deathbed, talks about his failed relationship with his true love, Natasha. Unfortunately, the words he chooses to describe this make it sound like he's just dreadful in bed. You can't "make a woman happy", Fox? Then, Fox explodes.
  • The placement of the machine gun on Metal Gear D. Seriously, what is it with Kojima putting weapons and stuff on robot's dicks? Or giving them dicks to begin with (see REX and Jehuty)?
  • One of the bosses is called Red Blaster...and he doesn't wear a single speck of red on him. And if you're aware that he's Russian, it's still Narmy, since what Russian would proudly claim themselves "Red" in such a fashion?
  • The simple fact that what does Big Boss in is an Aerosol Can/Lighter combo. Mind you, this is the guy who once lifted the entire leg of a mech by himself, was electro-tortured, had his eye shot to hell, was shot in the thigh, survived a god knows how high drop down a waterfall and a near 10 minutes underwater.
    • Made even funnier by The Phantom Pain, and the reveal this this is exactly how Ishmael/ Big Boss dealt with Quiet in the prologue - this is actually supposed to be an ironic death.
  • MG1 introduces us to the epicness that is Shoot Gunner/Shotmaker. The End could photosynthesize to regain strength, Psycho Mantis was an unparalleled psychic and Vamp is practically immortal, and Shoot Gunner...has a shotgun. The MSX games' bosses are so mundane its hilarious. Considering that these are the guys Big Boss and Venom Snake put their faith in...
  • Running Man. There's a boss in MG2 called Running Man. And his skill is...running really fast. And he can be beaten in the most ludicrously mundane of fashions: putting mines on the floor that he's too stupid to get around, treading on one every time without fail. And yes his name is an Arnie reference.
  • One of the many versions of Metal Gear 1 writes Big Boss or rather, Venom Snake's Final Boss introductory line as a hilariously casual/energetic "YEAH, I'M BIG BOSS"
  • The boss battle against Dr. Pettrovich in Metal Gear 2. Controls make it impossible for Snake to actually do anything about the frail old man who is choking him, meaning the only way to win is to shoot Pettro repeatedly in the back with remote control missiles, or make Snake step on land mines to injure them both.

Metal Gear Solid/The Twin Snakes
  • Each of the alternate endings in the original Metal Gear Solid had a handful, so there was no escape. Upon failing to save Meryl, Snake - sounding on the edge of tears for the first time so far - rants at himself for being too selfish to save her; it's genuinely moving until he cries, "I'm a loser!" If he rescues her, you then get to sit through one of the most gloriously cheesy romantic scenes ever written.
    "It's so beautiful. The sky, the snow, the caribou...and...most of all... you."
  • The usage of stock footage in both Baker's and Otacon's long speeches. It completely pulls you away from the action in that "...Did they actually USE THAT?" sort of manner.
  • The Twin Snakes had awful facial expressions, especially when you consider that MGS2 contained some strikingly subtle ones three years prior (for a good example, watch Snake's face during Emma's death scene). Snake, in TTS, has a permanent facial expression of mildly-annoyed confusion, which is all the more hilarious because it unintentionally suits his character. It hits rock bottom when Gray Fox is being crushed by Liquid, and Snake gives an impassioned scream of FOOOOOOOOOOOOX! - his face looks so terrible that it becomes immediately funny. And the Say My Name abuse was funny in itself.
    • The scene immediately before becomes Narmful too, if you're a psychopath who enjoys mashing the Square button to hear Snake complaining. "No! I can't do it! -" "AFTER ZANZIBAR - " "It's no good! I can't do it! -" "I WAS TAKEN FROM THE BATTLE - " "No! I can't do it! It's no good! I can't do it!" - "AN UNDYING SHADOW - " etcetera.
    • While the inability of a professional killer to Shoot the Dog, having learned from his past mistakes, is arguably powerful, try destroying the radome with your last missile. Snake's dialogue changes to reflect this: "It's no good! I'm out of missiles!" So much for character development, Snake.
    • Also in the Gamecube version, we have Ocelot's face as he notices that his arm's been chopped off. It looks more like the kind of face you'd see in a Dreamworks movie.
  • Anything involving Liquid and genes.
    • "SNAKE . . . did you like my sunglaahhhhhses?"
      • Liquid's, er... 'British accent' in general in the original MGS. One of the few bits of narm that was arguably improved for Twin Snakes.
  • His description of the "Super Baby Method". Followed by Snake's Parrot Exposition for added hilarity.
  • The Cyborg Ninja (Gray Fox) fight yet. It's hard to concentrate since Gray Fox seems to be having an orgasm from the fight.
    "Now, make me feel it! Make me feel alive again!" (a few punches later...) "That's good, Snake!" (a few punches more...) "HURT ME MORE!!!" (a few punches after that) "MORE!!! MORE!!!"
  • The DARPA Chief, Anderson, dies of an apparent heart attack right in front of Snake, complete with trying to voice his final words while clutching at Snake's shirt. After he falls to the ground, Snake takes his pulse, and simply says, "Huh. Dead." Funnily enough, Snake's justifiably freaked out in the codec conversation immediately afterward.
  • The conversation between Otacon and Snake in the elevator of invisible soldiers is rather scary, with the music growing in intensity...right up until Otacon leans into the screen and starts screaming at Snake to get out while the music swells in volume. There's just something about Otacon screaming combined with his zoomed in, terrified face that is hilarious.
    • Even better is that this conversation is actually kind of long, and yet these soldiers - who were in the perfect position to catch Snake by surprise and just shoot him - are perfectly content to wait until Snake figured out that they were there, before decloaking themselves and making a big deal about how Snake was clearly outmatched or something.
    • Additionally, even when Otacon finally figures out what's really going on in the elevator and the above-mentioned face-filling incident happens, he doesn't really raise his voice. He sounds like he's almost whispering to Snake about the bad guys being in the elevator with him when his face says he should be shouting at the top of his lungs. It's just as bad in The Twin Snakes.
  • The fully animated Briefing cutscene in The Twin Snakes. It starts off fairly sedate, until Snake rather animatedly gestures and flails about while speaking in a manner well out of character for him. At one point, Snake leans on the waist high examining table after taking in a Wham Line, apparently unaware of how ridiculous he looks mooning the camera. Of course this was probably meant as fanservice.
  • "A rat must have eaten it!"
    "Now who's being ridiculous?"
  • Snake's wonderful description of why it's unlikely that Liquid would survive:
    "He'll be sliced up faster than an onion on an infomercial."
    • This is changed in The Twin Snakes to "He'd have been cut to ribbons by the rotor blades." More accurate sure, but less fun.
  • "Can love bloom, Snake? Even on a battlefield?"
  • "Snake? SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE!?"
  • "A surveillance camera?!"
  • Contrast and compare: Exhibit A: Colonel Trautman in Rambo 3 being electrocuted on a metal bed- pained expression with suppressed cries of pain. Exhibit B: Solid Snake in Metal Gear Solid being electrocuted on a metal bed- NNNNNNAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
  • The death of Sniper Wolf. Her long speech wouldn't have been unintentionally amusing if she hadn't stated at the beginning that she had been shot in the lung.
    • To add to that, Wolf magically ending up with a shot up lung even if you spent the entirety of that battle blasting her with Nikita rockets or Stinger missiles.
    • And did we mention that it's long? Yes? Well, just try sitting through a tragic death cutscene that goes on for 8-and-a-half minutes. All of Foxhound's death scenes clock in at over 5 minutes, but this one takes the cake. Even with a shot lung, she's still able to give an eloquent, tragic recount of her backstory just fine, with a token choking noise as if to remind you she's dying.
  • How could nobody have mentioned the ladder instructions, yet?!
  • This is more of a generational Narm, but… If you played the later installments first, then went to the original Metal Gear Solid, you won't be able to take it seriously. At all. Why? BECAUSE NOBODY HAS A GODDAMN FACE. Say what you will about the Twin Snakes, but they at least have recognizable human anatomy. Making the cutcenes on 3DO hardware without changing the engine after being scrapped in favor of the PS1 made the game look dated, even by the standards of the time.
    • This gets even more funny when you play MGS4 and obtain a camo mask of Snake's PS1 face, jagged textures and all.
    • If Meryl hadn't said "oh gross!" upon seeing Mantis unmasked, it would be pretty hard to tell that he was supposed to be horribly deformed.
  • Snake's echoing death scream, which you'll have heard so many times by the end of the PS1 version you'll be ready to chuck your controller at the screen. "YAAAH...yaaah...yaaah..."
  • Nothing screws up the mood of a duel between Solid Snake and Gray Fox like the onlooker (Otacon) proclaiming that "THIS IS JUST LIKE ONE OF MY JAPANESE ANIMES!"
    • What makes it better/worse is that the very next two lines literally are as anime as they can be, with Gray Fox going on about he's "come from another world" to fight Snake and Snake assuming he wants revenge for something or other.
  • Snake describing Metal Gear Rex as "A Nuclear Equipped Walking Deathmobile".
  • "I LOVE to reload during a battle! There's nothing like the feeling of slamming a long, silver bullet into a well-greased chamber." Not to mention Kenneth Baker moaning in the background...
    • The above was removed from The Twin Snakes. Whether that's better or worse is up to you...
  • Vulcan Raven's line: "The raven on my head thirsts for his blood!"
  • Gray Fox using the codename "Deepthroat". If you're not familiar with the Watergate Scandal (or fell asleep when Snake mentions it) it can elicit a giggle or two for other reasons instead.
    ?: "Just call me 'Deepthroat'."
    Snake: "'Deepthroat?' The informant from the Watergate scandal?"
    ?: "Uh... yeah."
  • The white Cyborg Ninja/Gray Fox is voiced by the black Greg Eagles, who, while he tries hard, badly conceals his African-American baritone with a bizarre high-pitched rasp that destroys the drama in most of his scenes. It's especially jarring since he does such a good job voicing Gray Fox's codec alter ego, Deepthroat. The Twin Snakes fixed this by recasting the role with Rob Paulsen, who does an awesome job.
  • Revolver Ocelot is menacing right up 'til the moment that Naomi says that he's "totally obsessed with spaghetti westerns and cowboy movies". And then the Cyborg Ninja comes out of nowhere and hacks his arm off. It isn't until the end of the second game that Ocelot gets any of his man cards back.
  • The Twin Snakes is absolutely loaded with narm, especially the "airplane noises" as Chip Cheezum calls them. Other interesting bits include the new cutscene duel between Grey Fox and Snake after the boss fight with Revolver Ocelot (which features, among other things, cartoonish tire squealing sounds when Snake is knocked backwards) and Snake's reaction to Kenneth Baker forgetting Meryl's Codec number turning from a rather sedate "Damn!" to sudden screaming, flailing, stumbling, and aiming a gun at his head in anger.
  • In the original Metal Gear Solid 1, right after exiting the communications tower, Snake gets shot by Sniper Wolf. A moment later, he gets up... and then promptly kneels down in the open field to take a codec call. The Twin Snakes mercifully fixed this nonsense by having Wolf's initial bullet miss Snake by a few inches, and then Snake wisely diving behind a tree for cover and then taking his codec call.
  • Snake's victory over the M1 Tank in Twin Snakes goes from the original's immediate cut to exploding tank and dying gunner to starting with Snake unpinning a grenade, holding it for a good 5 seconds, and pitching it baseball style right down the barrel of the tank with ludicrous accuracy. Wha.
  • One improvement Twin Snakes made was giving more voiceovers to the Genome Soldiers, which is good. Of course it gets a bit irksome for some when one of the V As for the Genome soldiers is Scott Menville, which makes it pretty jarring when you end up getting seen and having backup sicced on you by Lloyd Irving, Ma-Ti or Robin. The same thing happens in MGS3 here Menville voices both an Ocelot soldier, a random scientist NPC and a Soviet radio officer in the ending.
  • The Best is Yet to Come is a beautiful song and gets effectively used in the game's more emotional scenes. Well, for the first few, anyway. It's used so many times in nearly every dramatic confrontation it feels obnoxious. To the point where whenever the operatic vocals start playing, it becomes funny instead, as if it were a Running Gag.
  • Mei Ling describes the Soliton radar as being "made from currently existing technology." Well, no shit Sherlock.

Metal Gear Solid 2
  • Whenever someone says "La-Li-Lu-Le-Lo" in Metal Gear Solid 2, it undermines the drama of the scene. The voice actors had a decent stab at appropriate enunciation, at least. The same can't be said of the excruciatingly corny Russian accents.
    • Olga Gurlukovich's Russian accent is right up there with Tim Curry's Romanian accent in Congo.
    • The La-Li-Lu-Le-Lo thing makes a cameo in Super Smash Bros. Brawl in all its deadpan glory (at least in the English version). It's in Snake's codec of Luigi.
      • Said Brawl Codec also mocks the death scream:
        "Colonel? COLONELLLLLLLLL!"
  • MGS2 also had Jack and Rose's relationship drama, which, despite aiming for meaningful and moving, has been known to send many gamers into fits of hysterics. The favorite whipping-boy of these conversations is the one about Raiden's room and the infamous "empty like your heart!!!" line. Rose repeatedly attempts to get Jack to recall why the, er, Arc Date April 30th is important to her; while some of her nagging was intended to be funny, it meant that, when it took a darker turn, it got funnier.
    • There's also the classic Raiden delivery of "We've managed to avoid drowning!" as if it's something to be terribly, terribly proud of.
      Campbell: There's a terminal in front of the elevator, a node.
      Raiden: Did you say "nerd"?
      • The 'nerd' line is supposed to be significant. A major part of Metal Gear Solid 2's subtext is that the gamer is fantasizing about being Solid Snake as much as Raiden is, and the node at the start of the game is where you input your name and other details. The intention is that you are the "nerd." However, the way it's delivered makes Raiden sound like a raging jackass.
      • Immediately following this is the first Codec call regarding luring guards away. The Colonel suggests making some noise... and Raiden asks "how?" in the single most confused tone of voice he will ever muster in the entire game, as if simply tapping his fist against a wall is something he's never discovered before in his life.
    • Apparently, the narm of the MGS series has reached the point that things like having a terrorist squad with a freaking vampire who can run up a building, a woman who can't be hit by bullets who had a backstory worthy of a character from Berserk and a fat demolition expert that runs around on roller skates drinking wine through a bendy straw are par for the course.
  • "By the way, Jack, I was the one who killed your parents."
    • Directly ripped from legitimately dramatic revelation in the previous game, where Gray Fox has good reason to be holding back the fact that he adopted Naomi Hunter as an orphan because he had killed her parents during the Mozambique civil war. It lacks the potential drama here since it comes out of nowhere and is completely pointless.
  • While all of the above are good points, they don't touch the glory that is Stillman - not even Rose. "I killed mah SOUL!" "This is the only way I can defuse mah sins!" Even without the shouting, how can we take his dramatic confession seriously anymore if he drops a bad bomb-related pun like that? (He's the explosives expert who taught Fatman, but still.)
  • ''A DUD!?!?!!" One marine's response to a grenade fired at Fortune failing to detonate. It's hilarious mostly for the weird American, near Noo Yoik accent he's sporting that none of the other SEALs we hear speak come even close to matching.
  • "Don't test it! You'll be bacon!"
  • "But WHY?!"
  • "I'm afraid of the night!"
  • Otacon screaming out "E.E.!" during Emma's death scene. This is a horribly awkward nickname to say, let alone scream dramatically, since it really does start to make Otacon sound like a monkey. This is made even worse when Emma actually asks him to call her "Emma": he asks "what's wrong with E.E.", and with the best/worst comedic timing possible, she immediately drops dead. The moment just afterwards, where Otacon sees Emma's parrot and yells "E.E.?! DAMN!", is also pretty narmy.
    • It's even harder to take seriously if you're on a playthrough were Raiden and Snake are wearing sunglasses. Especially the moment where the camera shows all three and everyone has glasses on, since Otacon's the only who needs glasses anyways.
    • Chris Randolph's delivery of the line "what's wrong with E.E.?" makes Otacon seem like an oblivious child with no grasp of the concept of death. You kind of expect him to follow that up with a question about when she's going to wake up from her nap.
  • Raiden throwing away the dogtags that have the player entered information printed on them during the ending is supposed to be symbolic of him separating himself from the player and make the player wonder if the person going through the S3 plan was Raiden or themselves. However, this is somewhat undercut if, like some players, you decide to abuse the Hello, [Insert Name Here] potential by entering something like "Suck My Dick" or "Boner Patrol". Or, heck, something belonging to an in-game character. Adds a certain bit of confusion to Raiden's claim that he's never heard of the name written on the tags before.
  • During codec conversations, feel free to press R1 or R2 to hear the (positive and negative respectively) thoughts of whoever you're playing as. Sometimes it's hilarious pressing R2 just to hear Raiden shout "Whatever!" just before fast forwarding a conversation you don't wanna hear. Especially from Rose. In fact, one fun thing for players to try is randomly tap R2, and if Raiden does indeed shout "Whatever!" then fastforward through the whole thing.
    • This one gets especially ridiculous in the conversation with Olga in the torture room as Raiden's reactions are just the same as for Rose, ranging from a sappy "I love you" to a bitchy "You are a very selfish woman", all that adressed in a tense scene between two characters that are supposed to be tragic.
  • The Metal Gear Ray machines roaring. Okay, they're supposed to be scary, but do they really need to roar like a dinosaur?
  • Vamp's tongue licking before the fight is kinda narmish.
  • In one of the game's death animations, Campbell shouts Raiden's name, sounding like he's calling him for dinner.
    • One of Emma's deaths in the same video(around the 8 minute mark) has Otacon saying Emma's name in an annoyed, rather than sad, tone.
  • If Vamp wasn't bad enough, there's Fortune. If your character's every other word is a shrill nagging about how they want to die, don't expect them to be taken seriously. hiimdaisy nails the narm:
    Fortune: Finish me off — like you finished off my father!
    Raiden: But I don't even—
    Fortune: I'M SORRY WHAT WAS THAT I COULDN'T HEAR YOU OVER MY TRAGIC PAST.
    • Fortune's father issues lead into a whole different can of worms. There's two separate characters in the Plant chapter who lost their fathers due to the incident in the tanker and hold Solid Snake responsible - and he was not responsible either time. It makes you start to think if "Solid Snake killed my father" is going to become a darker variation on Murphy's Law, holding some well-known soldier responsible for all your woes.
  • The ludicrously whiny way Raiden shouts "400 seconds?!" when Stillman confirms the Strut A bomb's timer (the timer varies with difficulty, but most players play the game on Normal and get 400 seconds as a result). Combine that with how Stillman insists on measuring the timer in seconds instead of minutes.
  • Looking through the original Grand Game Plan for the game reveals some pretty narmy things, which were possibly removed because it was realised how silly they would be. Fortune, for example, was originally supposed to play the saxophone, which probably would have come out of nowhere and been at inappropriate moments. She also was supposed to carry fortune cookies around with her, and open them at different points in the game to find out that they said.
  • The codec that explains Vamp's backstory and the origin of his nickname. It starts off fairly serious, with Snake relaying that his family were caught in a terrorist bomb attack and how he only survived through drinking their blood...right up until Raiden exclaims "so that's why they call him Vamp..." It's at this point that Snake replies, in as deadpan a fashion as he could: "No. Vamp isn't for vampire, it's because he's bisexual." Not only is this a ridiculous and rather nonsensical reason for him to have that nickname (especially since "vamp" as a slang term tends to refer to seductive women, rather than men), but it's then followed by Snake and Raiden discussing the rumours surrounding Vamp's choice of lovers. It's played as seriously as it could possibly be played and it's hilarious.

Metal Gear Solid 3, Portable Ops
  • As legendary a soldier as she is, The Boss can make some truly AWFUL puns. Here's this one when she preps a sleeping The End for a fight with Snake: "And when he does (wake up) it will be The End for the boy."
  • Volgin. His lightning powers are no match for the fact that he is a fucking James Bond villain.
    • Failing to get information out of your target is reasonable. Getting so wrapped up in torturing him that you give him all your information is different. What should have been a dramatic interrogation scene that advances the plot only manages to hit two out of three points. Guess which two.
    • Volgin's best Bond Villain moment is right before he lowers you both into the pit, a great moment of ridiculous nonsense in and of itself. Hiimdaisy's comic summed it up well: "Fine. I will explain the entire plot before we fight and I lose."
    • Volgin's angry tantrums whenever the Boss reports the death of the Cobras are humorous. Yes, he's pissed off at their uselessness, but they'd be taken more seriously if they didn't amount to, "WHAT?! THE WEIRD GUY THAT CONTROLS BEES IS DEAD?! I'M GOING TO PUNCH THIS WALL!"
    • The boss fight against Volgin starts seriously and gets dumber as you progress. You shoot and CQC him. He survives, pilots the Shagohod and survives to an explosion. When Volgin finally catches up with Snake and Eva, he is furious with the former but will attack Eva if she makes fun of how he is at bed. Exactly, a tank starts following a motorcycle. During this time, Snake takes advantage of how dumb Volgin is and shoots him... It doesn't kill him! Heck, Volgin looks angrier. Then right out of nowhere Mother Nature (and The Sorrow) attack Volgin with a lightning bolt for no reason.
    • You can fool Volgin temporarily with the exact same Raikov mask. Mid-battle. Where he's likely to see Snake putting the mask on, right in front of him. Sure It Only Works Once, but come ON, Yevgeny!
  • The game has an example similar to the Cardcaptor Sakura one noted in Narm.Anime. It would be much easier to take The Boss seriously if she wasn't voiced by Diane Simmons/ Pearl. It didn't make her any less badass, but you may spend the Virtuous Mission half-expecting her to reply to the Major with a cheerful "That's right, Tom!"
  • The theme song, "Snake Eater", done in a James Bond-esque style, is both Crowning Music of Awesome and Narm at the same time. The music is great, but the lyrics contain lines like "Some day you go through the rain, some day you feed on a tree frog...." The incredible corniness is part of what makes it so good.
    • As well as the title— "Snake Eater"... well, we'll let you guess what "snake" is code for in porn.
    • There's a reason that when the theme starts playing halfway through the final boss battle, it starts off as an instrumental-only version.
    • This is part of the reason why the memetic "Ladder Sequence" is so memorable - it's just Snake climbing up an incredibly long ladder while the vocals to "Snake Eater" plays in the background for literally no reason. Doesn't help that it reminded people of the widely hated Charlie's Angels video game, which also had a really long ladder climbing sequence, and the kicker is that MGS3's sequence is more then twice as long as that one.
  • Some of Ocelot's cred as a hyper-Badass is undermined by MGS3 when he calls for support.
    ''MRRRROWR!'
  • The scene after the Ocelot boss battle. The Pain's hornets come out of nowhere and all of Ocelot's men start running and screaming like girls while Ocelot himself kills the hornets coming his way by twirling his guns, all the while keeping a straight face.
    • The Pain, himself. His Power Ranger introductory dance removes any possibility of taking him seriously from the moment you see him pose.
  • The Fear seems to have some sort of specialized Narm Tourette's involving saying the word "FFFEAR FEARF-F-FFFEEEEEEARR" to help add some derp to his otherwise creepy persona.
  • Big Boss' little reaction/thinking noises. Hrm. Hrm? Grrm. Mrm? Hmm! Ergm. Mrughm? Hnrgm. Murgh? Grm!
  • The scene where Snake, disguised as Raikov, is caught by Volgin and The Boss, and the latter asks "What is this fairy disguise?". And let's not forget that just a few seconds ago we saw Volgin see through the disguise by grabbing Snake's crotch, and it is realized that Volgin isn't exactly what he seems. And then we go from Narm to one of the most horrifying and gruesome torture scenes ever...while Volgin is proving that he is utterly inept at interrogation or hiding classified information.
  • The line "You are above even the Boss. I hereby award you the title Big Boss." from the ending can comes across as quite narmy.
    • What really sells the narm is that President Johnson says the above line in the same tone of voice you'd expect to use for congratulating a kindergartner for tying their shoes for the first time.
  • The death of The End is made much less dramatic when his dentures fly out of his mouth. That it happens mid-sentence is just icing on the silly cake.
    "What a splendid way to end it all. I have no regrets. I can return to the foremrrfmrmurf" *BOOM*
  • During the scene at the end of Metal Gear Solid 3 when Ocelot is fighting Snake as EVA is trying to stabilize the WiG cargo plane, that Ocelot had just fired a bullet into the engine of, she says, "Not good!" I'm sorry but that that one line came off as soundly terribly silly, the tone of voice EVA delivers the line in sounds like she is forcing out a turd or something and the sheer wallbanger territory the line reaches when you realize how obvious it is that the situation is not good, Snake is fighting Ocelot in a fist fight without the aid of a gun to protect himself if things go south and the plane all three of you are in is about to crash... OF COURSE THINGS ARE NOT GOOD! The overall scene is an incredibly awesome fight between Snake and Ocelot and serves as great character development between the two and shines some light on later revelations about Big Boss and Ocelot in Metal Gear Solid 4, but EVA's line and the delivery of it makes it somewhat narmful.
    • The worst thing is, it's as if they got her Japanese voice actress to say this line in English, rather than her American VA.
  • Sure, The Boss showing Snake her cesarean scar is touching, but why didn't she do up her shirt afterwards? And the scar suddenly coming to life and slithering away doesn't fit into the story at all, as symbolic as it may be.
  • The End's eyeball popping out of his head comically at the start of his sniping duel with Snake was just ridiculous.
  • The Fulton Surface-to-Air Recovery System. YOU'RE STRAPPING PEOPLE TO BALLOONS. Its real, but still.
    • No less badass for it, as Batman has proven. But in Peace Walker when they can extract soldiers even in doors? ... what?
  • The Shagohod. Not the thing itself, the name. It's easy to forget how scary the concept is when it has a name which wouldn't look out of place in an Austin Powers film.
    • Well, what do you know? The HD edition gives you a trophy called "Shagedelic" if you defeat it.
  • That scene where Ocelot rebels and basically tells Volgin to go fuck himself falls a bit flat when Ocelot spits "Fight like a man, Volgin!", not using his title of "Colonel" but pronouncing Volgin's name right. Then Volgin incredulously replies back with "Volgin?!"...but pronouncing it "Vol-jin", proving he's a doofus who can't even pronounce his own name correctly. That, or everybody else has been saying it wrong, and he's been too busy punching holes in walls and completely failing at interrogation to bring it up.
  • Naked Snake's conversation with EVA about his relationship with The Boss. Snake responds with, "She was like my mother, and my master." EVA responds with, "And your lover?" While it's meant to be a touching scene showing that Snake doesn't want to go through with the mission, EVA's response makes her sound like a moron and/or gives Unfortunate Implications. Even if she hasn't had any meaningful relationships in her life, no one would immediately jump to saying a man and a woman he considered to be his mother to be "lovers".
  • As mentioned above, Scott Menville voices a few NPCs, including the harmless scientists in the Granin lab and Groznyj Grad. Its more funny than anything holding a knife to one's throat demanding information and hearing Robin/Lloyd Irving whimpering like a kid.
  • The cheesy and very heavy-handed references to FOXDIE and FOXHOUND during the Snake Eater Briefing cutscene. Yes, we get it, MGS 3 is a prequel to the entire series, Kojima, we get that, but you don't have to hit us over the head with blatant lines like Snake's "Does this mean FOX is going to DIE?" and Zero's reply of "No. This FOX is still one step ahead of the HOUNDS." The lines don't have that emphasis there ingame but still. And yes, there are equivalent lines in the Japanese version as well.

Peace Walker
  • To receive a lower age rating for the Japanese version of Peace Walker, Konami replaced the electric torture with laughing rods. No wonder why Kojima was so pissed off after learning about this.
    • "Your next laugh will be your last!"
    • As one Youtube commenter said, "It sounds like he's playing with a broken vibrator". Thanks a bunch for the mental image!
  • Peace Walker. Snake corners Zadornov, who, in a final act of defiance on his deathbed, shoots a peace sign at Snake with his robotic hand, screams "ROCKET... PEACE!", and shoots it at Big Boss's eye.
  • Any time Paz opens her mouth.
    • Her commentary on the final boss battle: 'Soon, you will witness TRUUUUE HEEEELL!!!'
    • You will never hear a name so ridiculous as Pacifica Ocean. And this is a game where the main antagonist is named Hot. Coldman.
  • The sheer amount of times they say 'peace', 'deterrence', 'compas', etc., is enough that one would need to make a drinking game to keep track of it all.
  • Any facial expression Coldman makes. Ever. Rape Face doesn't even come close to describing it.
    • The very name Hot Coldman qualifies as Narm to English speakers. It might be a good pun and sound cool to Japanese gamers, but there's no one in America, let alone the CIA, who's first name is Hot.
      • Speaking of names, Kojima really sucks at them. How many Johns does a series need?
  • The scene where Snake meets Cecile. Let's see: Snake is asking an attractive, half-naked frenchwoman to come back to his place where she can have all the cigarettes she wants. Nope, everything seems COMPLETELY innocent here~!
    • Bilingual Bonus if you know french: Cecile has quite a strong anglophone accent for a native french speaker. Also, for someone lost in the woods trying not to let her kidnappers catch her, the way she reacts to meeting a total strange...
    • And so is Big Boss's answer "Stop playing hide and seek, tell me who you are."
  • The placement of the flame-thrower on Peace Walker.
  • Amanda Libre is voiced by Grey DeLisle. The problem with voice actors is that once you learn who does what voice, all of the characters that they do the voice of start to sound the same. That's right, you're hearing Vicky scream out "SNAAAAAAAAAKE!!!" in complete anguish.
  • Speaking of Game Over scenes, sometimes you'll end up with Cecile begging Snake to get up which is tense...until Cecile desperately squeals "I'll even do a quetzal for you!" and just makes generic bird whistling noises...which are subtitled as "Kyoooooh, kyoooooh." Its more hilarious than anything, keeping in tradition really.
  • The way Big Boss shouts "Bullshit!" after the Chrysalis battle in response to Miller talking to him about fighting an AI modeled after The Boss. It sounds more funny if anything, more so since we're unaccustomed to hearing David Hayter use harsher swearwords.
  • The scene in which Strangelove offers Big Boss some snuff from her hand, which he takes in a scene that seems VERY deliberately animated like he's kissing her hand. Yeah, you're getting a bit overt with the symbolism, Kojima.
  • Some vehicles, especially helicopters, will unleash salvos of explosives even in the stealth section of a fight. This is fair enough, it would be a valid "flush them out" intimidation tactic. But when their missiles sometimes hit the ground support troops by mistake? That's just cruel, chopper pilot.

Metal Gear Solid 4
  • Metal Gear Solid 4 has Raiden whining that "It even rained the day I was born...". That line's pure OTT emo whether or not it was rasped out matter-of-factly or shouted.
    • Snake's response was arguably worse: "You've got it all wrong! You were the lightning in that rain! You can still shine through the darkness!" Careful Snake, you'll make Otacon jealous...
  • The hilarious scene where Otacon breaks down in tears while watching Naomi's final transmission. It would've been sad if he weren't clutching to his chest, of all the goddamn things in the world, a MacBook Pro.
  • Gekkos. While it has its basis in Japan's history dating World War II, it's rather embarrassing that the toughest enemies in the game sound like cattle.
  • Snake's impassioned cry of "LIIIIIQQQQQQQQUUUUUUUIIIIIIIDDDD!" during the final fight. The fact that it looks like he's crotch thrusting adds to it.
    • Every other time he shouts the name, he grunts it out as fast as possible. "LIQID!"
  • Raging Raven/Beauty's crazy speech that establishes her personal fears and psychoses is ruined by one line: "The Ravens are pecking at my flesh! And my soul!" The speech is perfectly fine and disturbing otherwise.
    • Her screaming out "RAAAAAAAGE! RAAAAAAAAAGE!".
    • Whereas Laughing Beauty's speech is ruined right at the outset, as it begins with "I...am an octopus. An EIGHT LEGGED BEAST!"
    • There's also the part right after where she vomits ink. It would have been perfectly acceptable if she didn't keep vomiting for like five or six seconds straight without her stopping for breath or, indeed, without the ink-vomit ever receding.
    • Also during Raging Raven's fight, when you manage to get her out of her robotic suit, she begins ranting, and it's kind of creepy. Then you get an R1 (first person view during cutscene) moment when she turns away from Snake, and he's looking directly at her well-shaped but fucking crazy ass.
  • The backstories of the members of the Beauty and the Beast Unit were too over the top to take seriously. Except for Crying Wolf's and Raging Raven's.
    • Laughing Octopus's story is perfectly creepy if you just roll with it (hey, theoretically, it could happen). And then comes the bit about the spilled blood of the torture victims turning ink black. You-u-u lost me there, Drebin.
    • Some can't help but to laugh after hearing some of their backstories, simply because they were so implausible; Drebin's over-dramatic delivery just heightened the Narm. One almost expects more melodramatic things from them.
    (Done in a husky, over-dramatic Drebin impression) "She had a doll, a doll she loved. And one day the soldiers came and raped the doll. The pain was so great, the doll caught fire. And then it exploded. The explosion burned down her village, and killed her grandmother. And to this day, she carries the ashes of that doll. That, Snake, is why she's a crazy overpowered Fembot."
    • The inherent seriousness of the situation and the somber music just added to the Narminess.
      • See here for a Drebin Mad Libs generator.
    • Octopus hating cult...
  • The B&B Unit in general. They're a squad of weaponized furries.
    • Their little imaginary companions? Tulpas.
  • When Naomi dies, what would have been an extraordinarily sad scene is ruined because Otacon is present in the form of a little robot that flails in a cutesy manner as Otacon is crying.
    • Her dying words are spoken outside the hearing range of Otacon and Snake.
      • "Hey, come back you bastards, I'm not finished dying yet!" Snake and Otacon have a big emotional moment and drive off into the sunset together before she even lost consciousness! Charming.
      • What gets me is how, the moment her nanomachines are suppressed, the cancer kills her. Super cancer to the rescue!
      • Worse than that: nanomachines, which the game consistently assigns near magically omnipotent properties, somehow could only "hold back" the cancer, rather than kill the cancerous cells and cure it entirely.
    • What killed the scene was how hammy she was being as she died. It's like Snake and Otacon were unaware that she was dying so she forced them to pay attention to her.
      • Not to mention Otacon's hamminess. Bear in mind, this was a woman he'd recently met and slept with one time. If anything killed the scene, it was him sobbing, "Just when I was ready to love again!" Bonus because this has the effect of reminding the player of the narm in Otacon's other "girlfriends" deaths.
    • Rather than reflexively reaching out toward the dying Naomi, Otacon must be using the unquestionably complex remote controls to manipulate the robot into a simulation of a simple human gesture. It kills the drama when it is understood that the character, by necessity, must be making a conscious and complicated effort to create the appearance of an instinctive human reaction.
  • Examples of Narm that happen repeatedly:
    1. Meryl mentions "the System."
    2. Snake says "huh?" or repeats what was said back. (If a coin was given to charity every time he said "huh?" then there would be no need for charity anymore).
  • The whole scene with one-armed Raiden illogically deciding to hold a WARSHIP IN PLACE (so it wouldn't crush Snake) when he could have (considering his implied strength at this point) picked up Snake and taken him to safety.
    • None of this makes the sheer ridiculousness of the scene any less. The ship was going through concrete. No matter how powerful or durable Raiden's cyborg body is supposed to be, putting it between the ship and the dock wouldn't stop the ship from going forward. At best Raiden would be unharmed but the ground beneath his feet would keep getting destroyed. You don't need to know much anything about physics for this to realize that immediately. And this is if we ignore how fricking ridiculous the idea of anything man-sized being able to stop a damn tanker is in the first place. There are cool breaks from reality, then there're suspension-of-disbelief-shattering breaks from reality. Yours is made of steel if it didn't break into laughter at that point.
  • Then there is the cutscene immediately preceding the final hand-to-hand battle between Old Snake and Ocelot: while the beginning of the cutscene and the interactive portion of the battle keep two geezers beating the crap out of each other outside the realm of Narm, it goes completely to hell once Snake collapses and has to use his syringe to get back on his feet. After some more fighting, OCELOT collapses and uses ANOTHER syringe to get back up. After some more fighting, BOTH men collapse and use their respective syringes AT THE SAME TIME. Then after some MORE fighting they start collapsing and STAB EACH OTHER with the syringes. Yeah, don't try this at home, kids.
    • While most of the fight choreography was pretty solid, there were two moments that make people giggle with insane glee. The first is a birds-eye-view of Liquid whaling on Snake. Too much emphasis, maybe? The second is a bizarre cross body block from Snake that suggests he graduated from the WWE school of CQC (which, predictably, Ocelot counters by...catching him).
    • Seriousness dies when Ocelot kisses Snake for some reason in the middle of the fight while romantic music plays. It even gets you a trophy!
  • During the microwave scene, Snake's prominent buttocks glow.
    • His entire Octo-Camo was glowing; the color was fleshlike enough to make it seem that Snake was in a bunch of leather straps.
    • Speaking of the microwave hallway, that whole sequence was incredibly dramatic until the PIP screen cut to Sunny dancing in front of her stove.
    • "Is it a good idea to microwave this?"
  • Snake describing the Outer Haven ship as a 'Death Star.'
  • Naomi's final speech. "We wished to free the captured foxes. To let them run free in the wild."
    • Especially considering she's standing in front of BIRDS
  • After the mighty Crowning Moment of Awesome where Rex and Ray fight it out, there's a thoroughly ridiculous scene where Snake falls over and Ocelot's plan is seemingly to run off while laughing like a twit. It's like a militarised Benny Hill routine.
  • Two words: Mount Snakemore.
  • When the time comes for Liquid Ocelot to demonstrate his "Guns of the Patriots" plan, his choice of executing it is without comparison: Using his fingers as guns and shouting "bang" a whole bunch. The scene where he uses his fingers as machine guns, making machine gun noises as his troops waste the opposing armies, is the stuff of a thousand animated gifs.
  • Ocelot's English performance in this game can be ridiculous when yells "BROTHAAAAAAAAAAA!!!" Its a shame Cam Clarke couldn't return as Liquid but dear god did Patric Zimmerman go beyond the call of duty to give players what they wanted from him.
  • The epilogues. Dear lord. If the endless ramblings about zeros and hundreds and whatever didn't make that part impossible to take seriously, then the "Like a scene from The Beauty and the Beast" line definitely killed the next one.
  • The fight between Raiden and Vamp is intense and gripping. But think about it this way: Raiden and Vamp are in a swordfight that's causing Raiden to spray white bodily fluids everywhere.
    • Speaking of which, why is Vamp always licking his knives even when there's no blood on them? When Vamp first captures Raiden, he stabs him in the chest and licks the "white blood" off the blade. ...Maybe we're thinking about this too hard. Snake, who's currently aiming a sniper rifle to try and shoot one of Raiden's restraints off of him, has to take a moment to pull away from the scope and raise an eyebrow at that one.
    • Even sillier is during the fight when Raiden ends up with two Gekko strapping wires to his feet, he starts breakdance-spin-kicking on his head upside down whilst spinning said Gekko around., The imagery is just plain ridiculous and so over the top anime that not laughing is impossible.
  • And of course, it just gets more obscene with the unlockables on the New Game+, particularly the tuxedo and facecamo: You can watch Drebin talk to himself, watch Otacon sneak around like James Bond, and if you're good enough to get it, you can even see Snake replaced by the char-grilled corpse of Solidus.
  • "It's the FROGs!"
    • The fact that they are called FROGs is narmy itself. Ocelot doesn't seem to have a lot of faith in his elite, private army if he's going to name them after an animal that are known to get eaten by snakes.
  • Brilliant though the RAY fight is, one of the special attacks is a bit... unusual. There's an animation where REX jumps on top of a grounded RAY, then leaps off, bombarding RAY with lasers. Metal Gear REX's laser cannon is situated between his thighs. One or both of them will probably be squealing while this is going on.
  • Your iPod can cause severe Soundtrack Dissonance, such as, in the first level, playing what is essentially elevator music while people are being murdered by Gekkos.
  • Snake's body doesn't ragdoll properly when he's knocked back by something, leading to his body rigidly falling to the floor. It's quite hilarious, actually.
  • The final appearance of armless Raiden (carrying his sword in his teeth) is already a bit narmy, let alone how he only saved Snake because all of the FROGs dropped their guns to advance at an excruciatingly slow pace toward the almost totally paralyzed enemy with their machetes. But it gets worse when the duo pause to have a bromantic, sappy scene about how Raiden still has his youth and should let Snake go through the microwave hallway....and the two remaining FROGs were standing just out of shot the whole time, staring at them.
  • The cutscene after the epic Metal Gear fight near the end of Act 4: An injured Snake, having fucked his arm up mid fight watches as Liquid Ocelot joyfully runs out of his reach whilst turning around and giggling and pointing like a school playground bully. Its even more worth it for the too-fast jerky, almost comical way Snake limps at him, assault rifle in one hand as his injured arm dangles.
  • Whenever you beat the BB Corps' Beast forms, you then have to deal with their Beauty forms trying to hug you to death. What propels this into narm is if you try to run away from them, you can literally see them powerwalking towards you with their arms outstretched for a hug. It's ridiculous looking, they look more like comical hug-hungry zombies!
  • Johnny during the Act 5 mission briefing. By this point its already been established throughout the franchise that this Johnny is narm incarnate and even manages to bring out the narm in those around him, but attempting to cup Mei-Ling's buttocks with the subtlety of a boar in heat?
  • When Laughing Octopus makes her face-camo appear as Snake's face - while the camo is a perfect representation of his face, she's not only using her real (albeit androgynous) voice, but she hasn't done anything to conceal her body. So what we have instead of a perfect Snake disguise is Old Snake, but with massive boobs.

Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance
  • Let's face it, the whole VGA trailer was this. Doesn't stop the action from being Crazy Awesome, though.
  • Senator Armstrong lives and breathes narm. Though it seems to be intentional and at least partly self-aware satire of the series itself.
  • The subtitle "Revengeance" is either one of the most-ludicrous-yet-coolest portmanteaus ever or just silly.
    • Turns out it's actually an obsolete word, but that doesn't make it any less narmy.
  • Raiden's reaction (or lack of) to having his left arm severed? "Not again!" Yes, he's a cyborg from the jaw down, but come on!
  • Raiden's really been Snake-ing it up in this game. Sometimes, it's hard to not cringe when you hear him like that. Even more so when falls off high ground. Though most of his "Snake" voice is only done when he's being Jack The Ripper.
  • Sam chastising Raiden for being a hypocritical murderer: "You chopped them up into hamburger!"
  • When Sam receives damage his voice actor gives a weird delivery. It feels like if Sam is going through a reverse puberty.
  • Raiden's exclamation of "THE MEMES" and all the various discussions of such, given the meaning most people associate with the word.
  • Occasionally, some characters have pauses in their lines that really aren't necessary.
    Raiden: What do you want with the Prime Minister?!
    Sundowner: I want him......dead.
  • The fact that Mistral uses two of her many arms to control her breasts' bouncing is both hilarious and arousing for many players.
  • Courtney's Gag Boobs. Seriously, they're half the size of beach balls and she wears her shirt open so that you're always looking at her cleavage whether you want to or not. You'll be on the codec with her discussing some serious humanitarian problem and trying to focus on what she has to say, and the inappropriate fanservice just pulls you out of the moment.
  • Sundowner's memetic line, "I'M FUCKIN' INVINCIBLE!"
  • Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Jetstream Sam, The King of the Shit Eating Grin. This image has become nearly as popular as Sundowner's face for trolling purposes.

Metal Gear Solid V
  • Kiefer Sutherland's delivery of Snake's Catch Phrase comes across as this, given that it sounds rushed. Doesn't help that there is absolutely no context for him saying it at all this time, making it seem even more forced.
    Big Boss: Keptyouwaitnheh?
    • Sutherland in general has a weird slur that muddles many of his lines.
    Big Boss: She survaif?
  • For the most part, The Dev Team Thinks of Everything as is standard for Metal Gear, and will change small parts of the story if you decide to, for instance, rescue Paz first instead of Chico. However, if you bring Paz with you to Camp Omega's prison cells and then try to rescue Chico while carrying her, Snake will unceremoniously drop her to the ground with a loud thud as he enters cutscene mode.
    • Big Boss also doesn't really have individual animations for most of the prisoners you can extract in Ground Zeroes. This results in him hopping up onto the open chopper door with people unable to even stand or walk on their own and typically in great amounts of pain, and just dumping their limp bodies roughly onto the floor. Including the heavily-injured and half-conscious Paz as well as the crippled Chico. It's especially jarring since this completely opposes how careful he tries to be with them, especially Paz, in the cutscenes.
  • The face and noise Big Boss makes when you have to use the health spray when near death. UUUUUURRRRRRRHHHHHH-GA...
  • Miller's reaction to the destruction of Mother Base (and by extension, his dreams) is pretty heartbreaking... With the exception of the metaphor that he uses and the strained delivery of the line, which wouldn't be out of place in a Resident Evil game.
    • It gets better next. In his angry burst he shouts "NOW START TALKING, BITCH!"
  • Paz having a bomb in her vagina. Granted, it can be heart-rending to some if you know the context, but if you aren't shocked or horrified by it, you'll likely burst out laughing at the sheer ridiculousness of it (And its resemblance to that episode of South Park) and how it was pushed so stoically despite the fact that of all places to put a contingency bomb, Skull Face decided in his infinite wisdom to sneak a snuke up Paz's snizz. Its the one place he reckons Big Boss "will never look". Unfortunately, he was right. For the wrong reasons.
  • The opening level of The Phantom Pain, featuring Ishmael guiding the one-armed and horribly crippled Punished Snake out of the hospital, is mostly ruined by Ishmael's hospital gown being open and exposing his bare ass the whole time. The fact that Snake spends most of this on the ground and Ishmael is crouching in front of him makes it worse.
    • Also in the same scene is Ishmael repeatedly telling Snake to hurry or follow him, despite Snake having been in a nine-year coma and barely able to even move under his own power, let alone catch up. Ishmael, of course, doesn't bother helping him around.
    • In the final game, the sequence is somehow even worse because of the copious amounts of ass shots during the cutscenes. It even has ass shots while innocent people are being brutally gunned down by soldiers.
  • To some, the "Nuclear" trailer for The Phantom Pain tries to be serious and melancholy but ends up being unintentionally funny because of the Wangsty music choice. While thematically appropriate, they might as well have played "Crawling".
    • The "Not Your Kind of People" trailer, for similar reasons. A kind of power anthem for "different" people - while it does possess some level of thematic resonance, if taken at face value, the song basically equates Big Boss to your average self-absorbed emo teenager.
  • And now Phantom Pain has actually weaponized its Narm as a form of Easy-Mode Mockery: there's an item that makes you harder for enemies to see, and overall makes the game a bit easier. The catch? Venom Snake is forced to wear an adorable chicken cap for the rest of the mission, including during what are otherwise very serious and emotional cutscenes. God bless you, Kojima.
  • The name Punished Snake is a huge one itself because of how Wangsty it sounds, and spawned a minor meme of attaching "Punished" to random names. Chances are Kojima himself realized this and that's why Big Boss now goes by Venom Snake instead in later trailers. Unfortunately, "Punished" had the last laugh as by the final game, the pre-mission intro credits now list him as "Punished "Venom" Snake" creating the ultimate in early 90s Image Comics edgelord names.
  • After escaping through the hospital and Ocelot and Snake escape on horseback, the Man on Fire literally conjures up a giant magical flaming unicorn flying through the sky and then chases after them on it.
    • The revelation that he's a reanimated Volgin pretty much ruins nearly all the intimidation factor from the get go.
  • The "Birthday Party" Easter Egg is pure Narmy gold from start to finish - from the terrible singing by Snake's fellow Diamond Dogs, to Quiet lighting up Snake's cigar with a sniper shot.
  • The short quasi-credits that play at the beginning and end of every single mission can start to feel like a giant Running Gag very quickly. It also has some odd combinations like "Starring (insert vehicle here)"
  • Skull Face's death, as brutal and satisfying as it is, would've been much better if it weren't for his bizarre Major Injury Underreaction.
    • And then there's what finally finishes him off. After Snake and Miller indulge in an especially grisly Kick the Son of a Bitch moment, they walk away to leave Skull Face for dead, only for Huey of all people to finish him off. After seemingly taking a few minutes to absorb the gravity of what he's done, what are the first words out of Huey's mouth? A childishly Adorkable cry of "I did it!...Revenge!"
  • The open-world layout can create Narm via tremendous Mood Whiplash on its own too. One minute you're witnessing the cold, brutal realities of war; the next moment you're tying balloons to sheep.
  • True to Kojima tradition, one of the cassette tapes you can unlock is just audio of a guard having an EXTREMELY loud bowel movement, which is both Nausea Fuel and this trope.
  • Virtually everything about Quiet is made of concentrated amounts of Narm:
    • The easiest way to complete her recruitment mission/Boss Battle ("Cloaked in Silence") is to summon a supply drop on her head twice. Not only does this cause her to No Sell the effect (it knocks her over for a moment before she teleports away), but it leads to a hilarious case of Gameplay and Story Segregation when you complete the mission and find her sprawled out, trying to shoot herself with her own gun and having failed her mission.
    • The reason Quiet's so scantily clad? The parasites that she was given after being treated for the horrible burns she received early in the game force her to breathe through her skin via photosynthesis. Wearing any more clothing than a small bikini top and tights could lead to her skin suffocating. Not only is it a near Kill la Kill-level silly excuse, but it's quite inconsistent when one considers that The End, who photo-synthesized sunlight to rejuvenate himself and seemed to have similar parasites, got on just fine in a full ghillie suit. Also, it might make you try to imagine The End in a bikini. Don't.
    • Quiet's animations in the Air Command Center have her suggestively trying to woo Snake, even if the player's in the middle of a mission planning screen. It doesn't help matters that one of her idle animations is her stretching, with her rear facing the player as she stretches backwards, the "playful" post (she sits on her chest and stares at Snake with a longing look on her face) or the "butt shot" she does when the player stares at her for too long.
    • Later on in the game, there is an optional scene where Quiet strips down the (very few) clothes she has before seductively rolling on the ground in the rain. Then when Venom comes in, Quiet... starts to splash Venom like a little girl.
    • Having Quiet with you on a mission is a constant source of HMMMMMM, HMMMMM-HMM-HMMMMMMM. That's her humming her theme into her radio to distract enemies, but she does it almost constantly whenever she's in the same combat zone as you, quickly turning it into a Most Annoying Sound. Even better, if you move your camera ever so slightly, she'll target a different guard and start the humming all over again. HMM- *Chht* *Chht* HMMMMM, HMMMM-HM- *Chht* *Chht* HMMMMM...
    • The actual "Quiet's Theme" is hard to take seriously after going through much of the game hearing Quiet humming more or less as if she were thumbing through a magazine in a waiting room.
  • In Mission 12 ("Hellbound"), when Skull Face shoves him down the stairs, Huey pisses himself in terror when he lands. This would be fine (and appropriate) if that way it was animated didn't immediately bring that one scene from Metal Gear Awesome to mind.
  • At the end of Mission 23 ("The White Mamba"), Snake brings Eli back to Mother Base, and teaches him a lesson about not pulling weapons on comrades when the latter tries to stab him. Eli's expression makes it look like he'll attack Snake again in the future and he goes to walk off. At the moment, Snake lights up his Phantom Cigar and (unlike the rest of the cutscene-based uses of the Cigar at Mother Base), we get to see exactly what Snake sees - Eli walking away in fast-motion, waddling like a penguin. It lends an unintentionally hilarious mood to the ending.
  • Midway through Mission 30 ("Skull Face"), the titular villain spends a couple minutes monologuing to Snake about the importance of language and his master plan. During this scene, Snake not only doesn't speak, despite the two of them sitting into a jeep just inches from each other's face, but his idle animations cause him to routinely turn in the direction of the player with a "Can you believe how bored I am" look on his face while Skull Face makes grand gestures and reveals the English-language parasites. Even better, as soon as Skull Face finishes talking, the scene continues for several more minutes as Snake and Skull Face stare at each other very dramatically while Donna Burke's "Sins of the Father" plays in the background because one of the soldiers driving the truck put a cassette of it into the truck's radio.
    • This is followed up soon after with "Such a lust for revenge! WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO?!" when Mantis turns on Skull Face and takes over Sahelanthropus. It's pretty clear that James Horan knew he wouldn't be able to deliver that line in a straight voice, so he decided to say in the most over-the-top, hammy way possible.
    • Speaking of "Sins of the Father," while it's certainly a fantastic piece of music by itself, its use as a Leitmotif can be this, especially when the section used is the soundbite of Donna Burke wailing "Whoooa-HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!". That said segment plays everytime Snake lights up a Phantom Cigar just gets silly.
  • In Mission 31 ("Sahelanthropus"), during the middle of an intense action scene (Snake racing to drive away from Sahelanthropus as he destroys Skull Face's base), we have Skull Face ranting and raving to no one in particular. Made even more narmy because he makes an ill-timed David Bowie reference ("Major! I'M BURNING UP!!!")
  • During Mission 45, Quiet speaks English to save Snake's life...by boringly giving Pequod directions in Stefanie Joosten's thick Dutch accent. What's supposed to be a serious moment is made hilarious as Quiet stumbles over her lines, casually directing Pequod like she's telling him how to get to the nearest gas station, as the music swells into a grand reprise of Quiet's theme. It doesn't help matters that Pequod makes several wisecracks over this supposedly-moving and powerful plot moment, as he happily exclaims how surprised he is to hear her talking and mentions that he never knew she was so personable.
  • In the PC version, you can put in your own custom music that will play in-game, which can cause severe Soundtrack Dissonance during tense scenes.
    • You can replace the helicopter's theme (played over its loudspeaker no less) with anything you like. And we do mean anything. How's about Morpho/Pequod coming in backed by "WE ARE THE CRYSTAL GEMS?" Even if the music file you use comprises of nothing but screaming. Like what Vinny of Vinesauce fame did. It's easy to think "So much for a stealthy extraction" but nobody on the enemy's side is any bit the wiser.
  • Both endings come with a timeline of events, both in-game and real life, showing what happened to cause the game's events and what happens afterwards. While this is clearly meant to be a sombre look at how dark and miserable the series is (and the real life wars and conflicts that are referenced throughout), it can be humorous to people who enjoy black comedy when you realise that it's basically a list of which characters die at some point or other...which is basically all of them. There's something darkly amusing about the game just hammering it in that everybody dies at some point or another, because nothing and no one can ever be happy in this series.
  • The Deja Vu mission in Ground Zeroes is either a funny and heartwarming Call Back to the original Metal Gear Solid, or it's this trope due to how bizarre the whole thing is. The Uncanny Valley nature of Snake being rendered with PS1 graphics while the environment remains unaffected; the vital importance placed on recreating certain scenes from the game, regardless of how banal the original scene in question was (with a leitmotif playing and dramatic camera angles to compare the screenshot with the original it's replicating); the empassioned way that Kiefer Sutherland yells "LIQUIIIIID!"; and all of it capped off in a bizarre quiz section in which random dialogue has been repurposed, with the implication of there being a live audience who cheer and boo when required.
  • How about the fact that Skull Face just randomly wears a domino mask for the entirety of the game? He doesn't need to disguise his identity or anything, it's just sort of...there. He definitely did not have one on in Ground Zeroes either.
    • At one point, he takes it off really dramatically, and the game tries to play it up like it's a big reveal, even though his face is clearly seen in the trailer that came out two years earlier.
  • One of the many Oh Crap! phrases the Africa-based soldiers can shout sounds a lot like they're shouting "FLIPPING OCELOT!!" Okay, what did he do THIS time?
  • One late game tape has Miller and Ocelot pretty much telling a guilty Huey that they know he caused another parasite outbreak on Mother Base and got many personnel killed as a result, informing him that as soon as they get evidence they can use in their Kangaroo Court, his number is very much up. Only problem is, Huey's attempt at self-defense becomes laughably petty when he claims that the Diamond Dogs are all deluded thugs...which falls hilariously flat when he throws an accusation at DD, the team dog! His claim? DD is really a wolf, complete with this ridiculously desperate line:
    Huey: Anyone can see he's a WOLF!
    • Christopher Randolph acted his heart out as Huey but it doesn't change the fact that Huey, when he's acting as his own defense attorney, sounds so much like a Large Ham that its hard to take him seriously. Especially when he's blaming the frigging DOG for the Diamond Dogs' many problems.

Non-canon Metal Gear
  • Not even Metal Gear Solid Ghost Babel is immune. After killing the boss Marionette Owl, he says that he and his unit have vowed vengeance on 'Anonymous'. This was fine at the time; but with the rise of certain Image Boards, the effect is reminiscent of a certain FOX news broadcast. "His madness surpasses even my own," says Owl. Considering Owl's Freudian Excuse was that he found a murdered, shredded body as a child, you can understand he'd have such a hatred for a board full of trolling and Guro.
  • Another non-canon one, this one from Metal Gear Acid 2. Ho Yay between Snake and his friend Dalton reaches its hilarious climax with Snake lying semi-naked on a bed while Dalton chides him for being so reckless as to endanger his own life; Snake responds that it wasn't really recklessness because he knew Dalton would always be there to save him. Dalton agrees, says, "This will probably do you some good" while implicitly approaching - and then there's an extended Fade to Black. If you've been picking up on the Sub Text and are familiar with the Sexy Discretion Shot trope, you'll either be relieved or disappointed when the fade to black is revealed to be a loading break for the next part of the cutscene, in which Dalton is giving Snake a fairly innocuous item.
    • In the same scene, Snake is finally reunited, after huge personal tragedy, with his 'family'. Unfortunately the artist drew him with a look of absolute dread as his allies throw their arms around his neck, making it look as if he would rather have never seen them again.
    • Snake's hairstyle in that game ruins every single serious moment he attempts to have in it. You could argue that his usual hair was pretty Eighties, but at least he wasn't sporting a golden blond high-top-mullet.
    • Talking of Snake's hairstyle, in the first Ac!d, Snake had a straight, shoulder-length cut with the bandanna tied under. It's flattering until we see a couple-of-years younger Snake in a flashback who has hair the same length, but very wavy. The image of Snake picking up a pair of straightening irons so he can preen himself before a mission is patently absurd enough to ruin even a seemingly normal haircut.
    • Metal Gear Chaioth ha Qadesh, once you get to fight it. In theory, great: it's a living Metal Gear which combines the best parts of all its predecessors. The graphics don't help it look intimidating in a REX or RAY kind of way, but the real narm is that, while the camera offers loving views of its lower body, you have to shoot its Metal Gearhood.
    • And how does Snake manage to escape the Metal Gear's Self-Destruct Mechanism once he does manage to defeat it? Using its railgun to launch him into the ocean. Though it crosses over with Crowning Moment of Awesome, and he does break just about every bone in his body, it's an absolutely ridiculous way to conclude the story with one final big moment.
    • And then there's the ending of the first Ac!d, where the real villain Charles talks about fooling everyone with the fake Hans Davis, before suddenly going on a spiel about how he wants Snake and how he could... mold him into something greater than No. 16 was, and finishes by saying "Snake is mine. It's inevitable". Viewable here.
  • It falls somewhere between Hilarious in Hindsight and Crowning Moment of Awesome, but the final boss of Snake's Revenge is Big Boss!... who, upon defeat, transforms into an invincible giant purple robot and chases Snake down the halls breathing fire. Anything we could put here would completely fail to describe how this actually feels to play.
    • His weakpoint is the soles of his feet. It may be impossible to impart that vital piece of information and still sound cool.
  • Nick's death in Snake's Revenge is a fairly dramatic moment, but it's spoiled by miscolouring one pixel on his heaving back. As a result, instead of appearing to pant out his last words, he appears to have a long, firm sausage-shaped object on his back that jiggles up and down like a wagged finger.


http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Narm/MetalGear